I have several clients waiting on I60’s and although the waiting is the hardest part, when the Chaplain calls to schedule your wedding, please answer unknown calls as it may very well be the Unit calling. Last week, I declined an unknown call myself. Thankfully, the Beto Chaplain left a message to return his call.
Wednesday morning as I loaded up my SUV to meet two clients on my way to Hughes Unit, Cindy and I were still laughing about the two headed fur we took in trade from Huntsville and what we were going to do with it. “Maddy thinks it’s a stuffed animal and the twins are horrified.”
I haven’t had time to shock my furniture reupholstering connection yet with this “latest flip.” Terry will either tell me to trash it or tailor it to remove both heads and the legs. It will be a “wait and see” situation.
Occasionally our Flips ARE Flops instead but, since we don’t limit creative requests, we certainly do have a few hilarious adventures on site at Appraisal Appointments.
Cindy was covering Jack County Jail clients as well as Parker County and my son was at Green Bay Unit with clients while my niece, Leigh Ann was finishing editing on photos from Tarrant County Jail bride, Payton. I would be “flying solo down the back roads” with Skynard, Donna Summers, ELO, Elton John and the Bee Gee’s keeping my company today.
Checking in with Cheyenne, I let her know that I was taking the back roads in order to meet two clients on my way to Hughes Unit who wanted help buying their marriage licenses. I map out my travels to accommodate such requests on a regular basis.
Country towns have creative signage. One air conditioning sign had me laughing out loud remembering my twin sisters firm belief that “hillbillies are geniuses.” The sign? “Do you have a HOT WIFE? Service your A/C and cool her off.” I bet that guy was even funnier in person.
Passing by the Dairy Queen sign, I thought about my brother in law, Steve Daniel who has fond memories of riding his bike to DQ and fishing on the river in San Antonio. I loved the “howdy ya all” sign. Welcome to the friendly and fun back roads of Texas! The courthouse I was meeting my first client at looked like a Gothic mansion with the overcast sky behind it.
Settled in a small town with many of the stores closed down, sadly the expensive building was surrounded by smaller shops that had most likely (years ago) had been thriving with customers. The irony wasn’t lost on me. This courthouse ruled the center of Meridian, Texas. After helping my client get her license, I jumped back in to my SUV to head to Coryell County Courthouse and sent Cindy a text from my navigation.
My Crain Unit client has been having difficulty buying his license and after numerous phone calls back and forth, I had scheduled him into my day to address his apprehension by accompanying him to buy the license. I actually do this for clients frequently by “working them into my road trips to prisons.”
My timeline to meet my Crain Unit client was perfect since the courthouse was fairly close to Hughes Unit and mapping out meetings is essential to accommodating my schedule and my clients.
Driving down 6, I sent Cindy a pic of a “report poaching sign.” I’d never seen one before.
Cindy called me and asked “was that a poaching sign posted? I haven’t seen one of those in years.” I send road trip text photos all of the time if Cindy isn’t with me laughing about the things we see rolling down the road.
My sister can name every type of cow and admire a ranch fence like nobody else I know. Why? Because while I was traveling the world modeling, Cindy was building a dairy brick by brick in Gordon, Texas.
Cindy is far more “country” than I will ever be. We are Compensating Personality Twins as are Cindy’s twin granddaughters. It’s rare. Cindy loves “educating me” about goats, horses and cattle on our back roads journeys across Texas and Louisiana as well as Oklahoma. I think all cows look alike. But, Cindy loves to tell me what makes them different.
I always gas up because finding gas stations can be tricky on back roads.
By the time, I rolled into Coryell County, Christina had sent me a text regarding running a little behind which perfectly fit my schedule to meet my Crain Unit client before heading to Hughes.
Arriving at Hughes, I let Christina know where I would be in the parking lot while fielding texts and phone calls from other prison wedding clients. My phone never stops ringing. I dabbed on light makeup as the guard tower watched me change shoes, fix my hair and finally leave my SUV to walk to the main entrance. Lipstick and tinted glasses when leaving WorthamWorld early along with a ponytail are my usual attire. Flip flops are changed into dress shoes once I arrive at a Unit. I always wear a suit to Prisons.
Sadly, the status of the inmate hadn’t been changed from G4 to G2 which meant he would be behind glass. This upset my client but, it’s my job to calm my clients and I did. Had we known ahead of time the status change would be delayed, we could have rescheduled the wedding but, these things can and do happen.
No one likes marrying with glass separating them. Christina didn’t either but, we overcame the disappointment of having her fiancée behind the glass and enjoyed a wonderful visit prior to the ceremony. Since Christina didn’t want photos posted, I posed with her husband and bought photos of all three of us as well as one of her and her husband before leaving the Unit for her to keep.
Headed to Huntsville again, I thought of all the times I’ve driven to Gatesville the past two years. A city that two years ago, I had never heard of that literally is compromised of mostly inmates and prisons.
It’s shocking how frequently I drive to Gatesville. Many of the Units house females although Hughes Unit is a male Unit surrounded by female Units. Other than Hughes Unit, the majority of my Gatesville clients are males marrying females.San Saba Unit is also a female Unit I frequently make trips to as is Hobby.
The Hobby Unit clients booking with us are predominantly females marrying females. Since I’m always asked about this, yes, it’s legal for a male to marry a male or a female to marry a female. This question continues to confuse me. The Units I marry inmates in are located in the United States.
I have no idea why this question comes up pertaining to inmate marriage since same sex marriage has been legal for years now in the United States.
Tennessee Colony is also one of those towns and a regular trip for my niece, Leigh Ann or I to meet a client at their Prison Wedding.
Beto, Michael, Coffield and Gurney are regular trips month after month. Tennessee Colony like Gatesville and Huntsville is a “city of prisons.”
I had a surprising text out of the blue from one of my former production company friends asking “are you and Cindy under contract?” I advised Kristen “no, we are too busy for film projects and we’ve expanded inmate weddings to cover several states.
My niece, Leigh Ann and my stepsister, Tammy are going to be taking on California Prison Weddings by August 2019 with my son and his wife focusing on Oklahoma, Louisiana and Arkansas.
Due to my schedule with traditional as well as prison clients and Pawning Planners Clients, Cindy and I will continue to travel while focusing more on Texas and Louisiana when not traveling for destination bookings through Texas Twins Events.”
The truth is that although I’m consistently contacted regarding show concepts and inquiries, our clients will always be our priority. Cindy and I put everything we have into taking care of our clients.
If and when we have the time to take on the task of filming, it won’t be during wedding season. The reason for this is our time.
Prison weddings and traditional bookings during wedding season leave Cindy and I no time for Skype, voice overs, sizzle reels, conference calls and other time consuming tasks that production companies require. Flying off to pitch meetings in season is out the question for the Texas Twins.
Arriving back at my home office and preparing my suit for Hutchins Unit, I check in with my niece, Leigh Ann who will be handling photography Thursday for Brandy after her inmate wedding at Hutchins while juggling phone calls, emails and text messages.
In this type of business, responding quickly and promptly is essential. I respond every 2-3 hours to clients and keep them updated. Clients are anxious. The process to marry an inmate can run from 3-6 weeks or in unusual situations like Torres Unit, over a year. Inmates being moved are generally the reason.
Bouncing from an appointment with my grandniece, Makenna at Cooks Childrens Hospital for her dermatology appointment and meeting Cindy to take Makenna back to school before parking Leigh Ann’s SUV for her to jump into mine and head to Hutchins Unit. We all have suvs to carry numerous props for photo shoots except my son who drives a 4X4 truck. All of our vehicles are black which makes it easier for clients to find us in jail or prison parking lots.
My twin grandnieces, Maryssa and Makenna like Cindy and I have completely different health issues. Maryssa unlike Makenna had Precocious Puberty. Makenna unlike Maryssa has eczema and psoriasis. Completely different health issues is unusual for identical twins but, Cindy has had none of my health issues and I’ve had none of hers.
Makenna is trying a new steroid cream for her outbreaks and we’ve added bleach baths to the mix after her dermatologist suggested it to Cindy and I at her latest appointment.My youngest grandniece, Madyson is a ball of fire and not a twin. Maddy is three and a half but her first two years were spent with hearing issues we were unaware of.
Maddy has been in speech therapy after ear surgery last year and is now making great strides with verbal communication. Maddy also has wildly curly and unnameable hair.
My niece, Leigh Ann is the only person in our entire family with curly hair that she regularly flat irons. As a child, Leigh Ann was nicknamed, Shirley Temple due to her reddish curly hair. Maddy looks just like Leigh Ann did years ago.
Leigh Ann started photography shortly after the birth of Maddy and has worked with me for years. You can trust my niece to make your day as special as you are.
Like my entire family, Leigh Ann treats each and every client like her only client. From officiating traditional events and ceremonies to inmate weddings and photography, Leigh Ann loves working with our diverse client bases. Maddy also often “jumps in” on photo shoots with clients.
Did I anticipate our services as inmate wedding Officiants to expand and compromise the largest portion of our bookings? No. Who would? But, this diverse client base has become my favorite type of client. Why? Because unlike our other clients, the clients marrying inmates are far more passionate and thankful for our help making their Dream Event a reality that’s why.
The interest by media and production companies regarding our prison wedding clients continues to surprise me but, none of my clients are familiar with television and I’m very protective of their journey.
Standard reality contracts would take advantage of our clients who are often unaware of what the “talent” would actually be giving up if they werent educated by us about reality television and more importantly, standard reality contracts with production companies.
Thankfully though, Cindy and I are “very familiar with standard reality contracts” and more than happy to educate our clients regarding the pros and cons of reality tv. Our clients are our priority. Thirty percent of them don’t want others to know they are marrying an inmate. In fact, we don’t publish photos in order to protect their privacy as a courtesy.
I’m a multitask expert at all times but taking on filming is simply too much “in season” for me. Cindy and I haven’t had a day off in months.
Driving in to the guard gate at Hutchins Unit, my Hughes Unit bride called me to check on the status of her marriage license being recorded. I had sent it to San Antonio via 2 day priority mail on my way home from Hughes Unit and quickly tracked the envelope sitting in the parking lot and let her know it would arrive Friday at the clerks office today before 3PM. She was relieved that I sent it with tracking but, I send every marriage license with tracking unless I’m filing it in person. I’m OCD.
Parking my SUV, I sent a text to Brandy from the Hutchins parking lot to meet me at reception, I left Leigh Ann in my SUV. Brandy looked beautiful.
Going in to reception, we encountered a secretary who “didn’t know anything about a wedding today. I don’t have an I60.” Brandy was immediately upset. Who wouldn’t be. We had scheduled this wedding three weeks ago. Once again though, it’s my job to comfort my clients and stay in control. I had Brandy sit down and told the secretary to find the Chaplain.
Apparently, both Chaplains have retired at Hutchins which was a bit of a problem and thankfully, the volunteer Chaplain, Mike knew what was going on and where the original I60 was. The volunteer, Mike sent a guard to the law library to find a copy of the original I60 to give to the wardens office. This took nearly an hour.
When waiting on a prison wedding, the wait can be up in the air. From our escorts to locating the inmate to moving to the location, I can be in a Unit 1-2 hours. Rarely though, I’ve waited three hours. It happens.
When my client and I were finally escorted to the visitation area, my client was thrilled to finally see her fiancée! Although getting to him was exasperating, the wait was worth the joy I witnessed between my couple.
The stress and setbacks leading up to a prison wedding for clients is the hardest part of the process. Once the wedding is performed though, their relief is evident. Finally, they are married. FINALLY.
As usual though, the Unit photos were blurry and dissapointing. I had purchased 3. We left one with the Groom and I gave 1 to the bride and kept the photo below. Thanks to Texas humidity, my hair is a hot mess. I had cut my own bangs in my SUV again. Ugh. Wish I had time for a process haircut but it won’t be “in season.”
Walking out of the Unit, Brandy and I both were surprised at her grainy wedding photos BUT that’s why I pack an entire SUV full of bouquets, tiaras, clothing, furs and more. That’s right. Brandy was going to have a great day with Leigh Ann and I less than 3 miles from Hutchins.
I believe everyone should be able to celebrate their wedding day and my photo shoot and rolling photo booth ensure that they do. Cindy and I had found the blue fur at a junk shopping after leaving San Saba Unit. The fur was a perfect match to Brandy’s outfit.
We think of everything. Photography by http://www.facebook.com/maddieandmephotography.
The mahogany fur stole Cindy and I found junk shopping after leaving McConnell Unit a few weeks ago. We are always shopping for client photo shoot ideas, props and fun items.
Leigh Ann can’t wait to finish editing Brandy’s photos and I can wait to see them. When her husband is released, Brandy is also rebooking us to perform their Vow Renewal. We are looking forward to another celebration of joy and freedom long after Lock Up….
For a few months now I’ve been pushing off a press release for an award I was presented. Why? I don’t have time to sit down for a one to two hour interview. My work takes precedence over anything else in my life with family running a close second.
I’m frequently asked how I became so successful by others who readily realize that I have never advertised or needed to. The answer is by exceeding my clients expectations. If everyone else in the sales industry would put forth the effort with each and every client they too would see amazing results but, sadly we live in a world where sales are similar to taking a number. Once the number is taken, it’s thrown in the trash.
Relationships outlast the initial sale. I don’t treat clients like sales. I treat them as individuals and make their needs my priority. I’m different because I actually care about my clients.
My Beto client last week touched my heart. Her journey hasn’t been easy. Both of her parents were sentenced to prison when she was only one year old. She had also just given up her apartment and had her car towed a week prior to her scheduled wedding at Beto. Hearing this news days before the wedding and knowing she had a two year old son touched my heart. How could I find her help for a very stressful situation? I quickly went to my contacts at Womens Haven and Union Gospel Mission as well as deeply discounting my fee and even offering to drive her to Beto myself.
At her photo shoot, I asked her “what her plans were for her and her son?” My bride had family in East Texas but, her son attended school in Forest Hill and my client didn’t want to pull him out of the school she had fought to get him into. Her son’s school took precedence over any decision she would make to find a new home and job to support herself and her young son.
It’s not well known but, my twin sister and I were residents at Women’s Haven ourselves at fifteen years old. Homeless and alone, Cindy and I both lived at the center until we could get on our feet again. During my divorce, I worked 2-3 jobs to support myself and my son while paying his Ad Lidem attorney and my own attorney. Without my twin sister helping me by taking care of my son, I have no idea how I would’ve afforded childcare back then.
I’m driven and determined because I’ve always had to be. I’m compassionate because I’ve learned that caring about others journey is rare but, I care far more than anyone realizes.
Yesterday as I was driving back from Dallas North Tower and the county clerk, my Beto bride called me regarding filing the license. An issue she faced was that she no longer lived at the address she had given when purchasing her marriage license. If I filed the license for her, it would be mailed to the old address. I spent some time going over a few alternatives with my client that included going to the post office to put a hold on her mail at her old address as well as getting a P.O. Box or filing the license in person.
If I file a wedding license, it’s mailed directly to the address given by the couple. If a client files the license in person, the license is recorded and handed back. I suggested this option to ensure the license wasn’t lost in the mail and put gas money in the envelope containing her wedding photos to be sure she wouldn’t run out of gas getting to Dallas. I hadn’t heard from her prior to running to Dallas myself yesterday morning and assumed she had filed the license herself last Friday. Otherwise, I would have driven her to Dallas myself to spare her the trip and the expense of gasoline.
This morning as I prepare for a call from Kate, a journalist on my way to Tarrant County Detention Center, I wonder if my bride has been by my office to pick up her wedding photos and gas money? I wonder if she has found a place to stay or a job and I wonder how the burden of expenses involved to be a Prison wife will affect her life? I worry constantly about my clients. I can’t help myself.
There’s a stack of mail in my office awaiting my attention. There’s also a five page questionnaire for Power Woman Of 2019 awaiting my attention. I have 172 emails to answer and I have a text from Cindy. My day is off to a “roaring start.”
Cindy now has both of her adult daughters and all three of her grandchildren living with her. I’ve talked to Adult Protection Services in Valdosta and Texas. The “Stephaney Situation” is finally blowing over although I may need to testify in Valdosta, Georgia regarding how my niece wound up there and how I realized that there was a problem while at Wynn Unit with my client in Huntsville, Texas. It’s a long story.
Cindy is overwhelmed at “trying to make everyone else happy in my home other than myself.” Cindy does it all and without my help, Cindy would be doing it alone. Maryssa and Makenna argue incessantly and Leigh Ann has a chip on her shoulder regarding her sister, Stephaney moving back home. “Five females fighting” is an ongoing rerun at Cindy’s house. Arguing over the bathrooms, arguing over the chores, arguing about each other. I could go on and on here. Cindy lives at Camp Chaos. Don’t let the happy smile you see Cindy wearing fool you. Cindy spent seventeen years caring for our selfish grandmother. My sister finally snapped over our grandmother and kicked her out after nearly eighteen years. I would have never moved her in. I’m far less tolerant of moochers and morons than Cindy. My twin has the soft heart regarding our family that I possess regarding our clients. It’s a fact.
Cindy has spent her entire adult life caring for her children and grandchildren and Cindy needs a vacation. Cindy loves leaving her fighting family behind to jump in my SUV and head off to meet clients. Who could blame her? At home, chaos and more chores await my overworked twin sister.
After listening to Cindy nearly crying while I sat in my SUV at the Tarrant County Clerks Office preparing to file licenses before walking across the street to the county jail, I butt in and suggested “laying down the law. It’s your house. Your adult children are guests. I’m highly concerned about Leigh Ann’s husband, Alex coming to stay from July to August and bringing more chaos. You need to establish rules and guidelines. If you don’t, I will.” Cindy knows I will and it will be far less confrontational if she would snap and start putting her own needs first. If she can’t though, I certainly can.
My Beto bride sends a text asking “are you home?” I’m twenty minutes from home but at least an hour from attending to filing licenses and meeting my Tarrant County client. I suggest meeting me for lunch at the 7th street Starbucks in an hour after she picks up her wedding photos and gas money. I’m highly concerned about her and her child and have a list of suggestions for her to get back on her feet. I have plenty of time to get to Jack County Jail and Parker County Jail to meet my afternon clients before heading to Willow Lake Event Center with Cindy at 4PM. Leigh Ann will pick up Maryssa and Makenna at 3:30PM and after their incessant arguing this morning on the way to school, Cindy could use a break from the twins and Leigh Ann quite frankly.
Yesterday, Cindy and I were with our clients at Taylor’s rental looking at bar height tables and chairs for a June graduation party when Leigh Ann sent a group text to Cindy and I regarding Stephaney. I was instantly lit because when my family know we are with clients, the last thing I need are to be blasted with family bickering but, Leigh Ann consistently and repeatedly makes her problems a priority to her mother and I. “Maddy had milk on her mouth and I asked where that milk came from? I went into the living room and Stephaney was eating cereal and had been sharing it with Maddy. I’m so furious about this that my hands are shaking!”
I walked out of Taylor’s to call Leigh Ann. While she attempted to interrupt me, I interrupted her. “Listen, we are on location with clients. We don’t care about your problems and if Maddy wasn’t hungry she wouldn’t be asking Stephaney to feed her. You need to go feed your daughter and stop disrupting us with stupidity while we are working. We don’t care how mad you are. Now we are mad you bothered to dump your problem on us. Grow up.” I then hung up and practiced smiling in the parking lot before walking back to my clients and sister.
I abhor disruptions to my carefully orchestrated agenda from family members and everyone realizes it. And yet, the consistent disruptions from my family are a regular and consistent occurrence in not only my life but my twin sisters too. Dash it all.
What Leigh Ann should have been doing was feeding Maddy first and finishing the Sunday rehearsal photos second. But, explaining prioritizing to my niece is an escapade in futility.
Meanwhile, my Bridgeport bride had sent me a message on FB that would have to wait until choosing tables and linens and my Allred client wanted to know about the Absentee Affidavit while my Torres client was concerned “about the glass” and my Eastham client wanted to know “how much longer the I60 would take?” My phone never stops ringing and bleeping alerts.
Preparing myself to text back and answer emails from the Taylors parking lot after happily waving goodbye to my June clients, I turn to Cindy and say “about the California back and forth situation, I’ve come to a decision. We aren’t telling any of our adult children when we are leaving or arriving in California. We need a few days of fun without being drug into drama in San Diego with Leigh Ann, the twins and Alex. We won’t check in on FB. We will pretend we are still in Texas. Wink. Wink.”
Cindy is shocked by my “plan.” I’m not. I need a break from my family and whether Cindy knows it or not, she does too. My sister is thinking. I jump in before she can respond (as usual) “listen, we are exhausted and overwhelmed. We have a podcast with Karen and then the Twyce Twins, a press release for Power Woman Of The Year, a follow up interview with Kate, and we are juggling 29 clients with new clients each and everyday. We need a vacation and I’m booking us into The Beverly Hills Bungalow for three days of spa, shopping and fun before we hit the bricks on that August wedding in two cities. It’s going to be an ass whipping and if we don’t catch our breath, I’m afraid we will be in the hospital from pure exhaustion. We are bouncing from Louisiana to Arkansas to Oklahoma to California seven times between August and October. It’s time to put our needs in the “front pocket” in order to be camera ready and refreshed for our clients. Our families and their chaos are killing us with stress Pal. Unlike our clients, they dont appreciate our sacrifice today, tomorrow or ever. With them it’s me, me, me, I, I, I. We must hopefully before our 55th birthday in November, learn to put our demanding kids and chaos on the back burner.”
Warily, and probably feeling guilty (as usual) my twin sister agreed. Traveling gives us the opportunity to enjoy each other’s company but, thanks to cell phones, our family is always a text or phone call away from screwing up the day. It’s a fact.
My son and his wife have been traveling together as an Officiant and photography team the past 4 years. When my son and his wife get into an argument, everyone in my family hears about it. My daughter in law “I can’t drive with him in the car. Nothing I do is right and he makes me nervous.” My son “Stephanie doesn’t pay attention. She’s either driving too slow or driving too fast.” Me “you two are married and work together. Try to stop bickering and work together on learning patience.” Cindy “Robert and Stephanie Hafele are arguing again.” Me “I cannot stop what’s coming. Those two think they are communicating when in fact they are arguing.”
When I’m on location with Leigh Ann as I was last weekend at one of my rehearsals, I’m called “The Boss.” I instruct Leigh Ann on locations for photos and how to pose the wedding party. I wonder how Leigh Ann will handle addressing clients in California when I’m not there telling her what to do? It’s a valid point. I recognize that more flights to California to “save the day” await the Texas Twins. Our adult children are needy and often demanding. Heavy sigh.
For two years now, I’ve been bouncing between states for inmate weddings. It was essential due to my burgeoning client base to add Leigh Ann as a TDCJ Officiant and to bump county Jail Weddings as well as traditional requests for an Officiant/photographer to Robert and Stephanie.
Cindy and I are both stretched to the limits. My traditional bookings are now three years out. Weekends and evenings that include holidays are taken up by traditional clients.
Trying to find a day off is impossible during wedding season. As usual, my anniversary will be bumped into my birthday this year when things slow down. My husband accepts my overwhelming schedule. He knew when he married me that I was an overachiever and accepts it. He’s also fifteen years older than me and turns off his phone from 6PM to 8AM Monday through Friday and altogether on weekends.
Matthew is “off work when he is off the clock.” We have very different views regarding client needs. I never turn my phone off which may be why my husband is “tuned in” on client needs and family chaos. He hears it all.
My husband doesn’t have any family to burden him with their problems. I cannot imagine what a worry free blessing that would be to not have adult children or grandchildren and their problems dumped in your lap like my husband doesn’t. Seriously. My husband as well as Cindy’s husband don’t have children which is a remarkable comparison to Cindy and I with our “carnival of chaos kids and grandchildren.” Opposites do attract. Our marriages are proof of that.
I’m going to go over the certified marriage license to address questions about the process of changing an inmate status from single to married. While we are inside a unit, often there will be a copy of the marriage license filed with inmate records. This is not a certified copy.
What constitutes a certified copy being available has a few caviats. First, the license must be signed by the Officiant AND then filed at the clerks office either in person by the client or via certified mail from me to the clerks office BEFORE a certified copy of the license is available for purchase.
The certified copy bears a seal deeming it as certified to be true and correct. While the original marriage license (after being signed and filed) can be used for the DMV and SS Office, it CANNOT be used for a change of status to inmate records.
Only a certified copy of the marriage license can accomplish this task. You will purchase and then mail the certified copy to inmate records at the Unit your spouse is incarcerated at.
You have 30 days from the date I married you at the Unit to provide a certified copy. You will then need to change your name (if you intend to do so) on your state issued ID for visits to the Unit.
The reason that Units NOW REQUIRE a certified license is to prove the marriage license was filed and is legally binding.
Apparently, several people were “going through the motions to get married” but, by not filing the license, were effectively not legally married. Due to this issue, certified marriage licenses are now a requirement at many if not all Units.
Reading a text from one of my Coffield Unit brides was truly good news today. The inmate has made parole and will finally be coming home. I cannot wait to Officiate their Vow Renewal with family and friends present to celebrate their new journey of freedom and promise together. God Bless my amazing couple and their resilience. What a blessing.
My Beto bride and sit down together to “go over her plans for her son and their new direction to move to East Texas.” Visiting for a little over an hour before running off to Jack County, I also prayed that this trip would bring my client a new job and positive direction although removing her son from school was somewhat troubling to her. At two years old, her son is resilient enough to change schools now as opposed to being older. I will order her certified license as the Officiant and forward it to her to send to the Unit.
Since there are many questions about certified marriage licenses, I’m adding a photo of the questionare for Dallas County for your review.
The cost in Dallas is $10. The cost may vary by county. Tarrant county charges $21. Unlike Dallas county, there is no form online in Tarrant county. Here’s the link– Tarrant County Certified Marriage License Request.
Juggling incoming emails and text messages while sitting in the parking lot of Jack County Jail, my husband sends me a text telling me he loves me. It’s the little things but the stinky skunk development problem is finally over and Matthew is relieved! Thank goodness. We’ve had a month of brain storming to solve the skunk issue and, it’s a month too long.
I miss my happy go lucky husband. Matthew is actually hilarious when he isn’t stressed out. Cindy and I are looking forward to road tripping to Stiles, San Saba, Crain and Huntsville Units before heading back to Louisiana in May. We love getting away for a day or two and hitting the junk shops together.
My husband prefers long walks with my feisty Beagle, Foxy Wortham along with the Golf Channel or NASCAR and a dry martini.
Cindy’s husband left for Canada today so she has 5-6 days before Steve Daniel is back home for a 1-3 day “staycation” at Camp Chaos AKA Cindy and Steve’s house.
With five females fighting over the bathroom, I’m guessing Steve was “ready to roll.” Fighting for a bathroom isn’t fun at Cindy’s house. I drink a lot of water and coffee and it’s not uncommon for me to stop at Petro on my way to her house to effectively “stand in line.”
Things will get worse when Alex comes to stay for a month before leaving for San Diego with Leigh Ann, Maddy and the twins. A summer in San Diego will do them all good and an empty house will be a Godsend to Cindy as we bounce all over the place to client bookings.
In fact, I’m looking forward to Cindy staying at my house for our slumber parties and spook movie nights.
My Saturday clients are so much fun that Leigh Ann and I can’t wait to see them again. I love it when clients at outgoing and spirited at photo shoots.We love our LBGT clients and I’m looking forward to seeing the rest of the rehearsal photos for Brokk and Ruben.
Since I’ve been asked, I do stop and start blogs between bookings. I just leave my WordPress app open and pick up where I’ve left off. All of my blogs are typed with one finger on my iPhone. Often, while waiting on a client at a Unit or venue. I spend a lot of time waiting as I’m always early.
I reviewed another email regarding someone else blogging on one of my sites and will once again go over why I have no interest in “guest writers.” First, my content is entirely my own and based on my experiences with clients and my family since they are both combined.
Secondly, I have no interest in sharing my platform with others.
Thirdly, I do not allow back links on any of my sites. Sorry, but, I’m not now nor will I ever be interested in having a guest blogger.
I’m off to the Parker County Courthouse and looking forward to meeting all of my new clients in the coming weeks…
Wednesday afternoon while headed to Willow Lake Event Center, my TDCJ Beto Client called me while exiting Santa Fe towards the venue and my “traditional clients.” Sitting at the red light watching semi’s pulling out of Petro, I hit “accept” and wondered where my brother in law, Steve was driving since I hadn’t heard from him since Monday and if my niece, Stephaney would get the waitress job she had applied for at Petro? My mind never stops.
Apparently, the Warden at Beto had called my bride which is somewhat unusual. I shifted my attention to her to find out more. “He will be behind glass. The glass upsets me. I was hoping to hold his hand or hug him but, we will be separated. I’m terribly upset about this.” Dang. I was rattled myself. “The glass.” No one loves the glass.
Since I was thirty five minutes early for my appointment at Willow Lake and only twelve minutes away, I pulled into Petro to attempt to calm down my client.
I should note that the majority of my “upset client calls” will always be my Prison Wedding Clients. Why? Because they are not in control of a lengthy process that often confuses them and occasionally even scares or angers them. I’m the hand holder. I’m generally the go between and I’m usually the one talking to the Warden.
The glass is something no one is ever comfortable with. Behind the glass, the inmate is also handcuffed. At Ferguson Unit, the inmate was also locked into the cage behind the glass.
Ferguson was also the first time I would encounter an inmate behind the glass and effectively, shocking to me. I didn’t expect the glass although my client was prepared for it. Occasionally while inside the visitation area for a wedding ceremony, I will notice the glass cracked or writing on the wood. I asked one guard “how did the glass get broken?”
The answer surprised me. “Well, Miss Wendy, the inmates get angry at visitors and hit the glass.” Hit the glass? To the person that drove all the way to the Unit? Waited in a long line. Went through the screening process? I was shocked. The wiring under (also sometimes above) the glass was how my client and I communicated with the inmate. It’s essential that the inmate can understand the commitment aspect of the wedding ceremony.
I was more than a little nervous about the inmate hearing and subsequently, understanding me but, he could easily hear and understand the ceremony.
The wedding photo above thrilled my client because the glass “merged them together.” Walking back to the parking lot, I hid my silent tears from my client and “braced myself” for smiles a few miles from the Unit for her wedding photos. I didn’t want her to know how rattled I was about the glass and the wedding photos. I hid my sorrow intentionally. She couldn’t touch him. It pained me.
As a mother, the aspect of marrying an inmate is a lonely life of isolation for many of my clients marrying an inmate that is often serving 20, 30, 50 years or even life. My clients may never see their spouse on the outside. It’s not an easy path. They may never touch them.
I worry about my TDCJ Clients and on occasion, have even talked a few out of marrying the inmate. It’s a rare occurrence but, it has happened. The “Coffield Unit Con Man” who attempted to control my client and her money needed the boot and got it.
On my fourth phone call from my emotional Coffield client, I had suggested that she consider what the inmate was bringing to her life. If the only “gift” was strife and argument, it was a gift that she needed to give back.
It took a month but, the Prison Wedding Planning Process isn’t “quick or easy.” If one of my TDCJ clients wants “out,” they have time to effectively “hit the highway.”
Mary was determined to marry Lester. Her path wasn’t easy. It would take months. Mary would never touch Lester. The glass would always be separating them from one another even on their wedding day.
The glass didn’t make Mary uncomfortable as it hadn’t made Nikia uncomfortable. Mary and Nikia were prepared for the separation. I was the only one uncomfortable with the glass and the inability of my clients to touch their new spouses. It always saddens me.
It’s difficult for me to accept that for a number of my clients, they will never touch their spouse. The glass will be a part of every visit they make to the Unit. It will be a permanent “barrier.”
The glass is something neither I or anyone else can change but, it always saddens me nonetheless. It’s something I must accept ascmy clients have. It’s also something “I’m working on.” G4 and G5 inmates are always behind the glass. Lifers are too. I’m never really prepared mentally to Officiate a ceremony that won’t be “sealed with a kiss.” My heart hurts. I have had hundreds and even over a thousand “other couples” to compare my wedding ceremonies to.
From my couples “on the outside” to couples “on the inside,” the differences between both sets of my clients is significant.
While one set of my clients worries about the perfect dress, the perfect cake, the perfect venue, the guest list, the DJ, the photographer and more, the other set of clients drives several hours to get to the Unit, worry that their clothing will be within the visitation guideline, and try to remember to bring quarters to buy low quality wedding photos for $3 each if they are even offered at the Unit. Private Units do not offer photos.
I had finally calmed my Beto client down “about the glass” before pulling out of Petro. It wasn’t an “easy conversation” it never is when a client is upset.
Mentally, I prepared myself for the first “behind the glass” ceremony at Beto. I wondered if they would have the phones Allred did that no one could hear using? I hoped my bride wouldn’t cry seeing the inmate behind the glass.
I recalled my Coffield client vomiting in a trash can beside me when we walked in to find her beau behind the glass. The shock rattled her to such an extent that it took several moments to calm her before proceeding with the ceremony. She also “nearly ran” from the Unit following the ceremony. I was forced to chase her down because I feared that if she left the Unit upset, she might have a car accident. Luckily, I had plenty of time to talk her through the shock of the glass and explain to her that it was something neither of us could control.
Normally, I leave one Unit to head to another. On the Coffield Unit day of “the glass,” I wasn’t due at another Unit for several hours and had plenty of time to spend with my client. She was so upset that she skipped doing bridal photos and I bought her lunch instead at the infamous General Store in Tennessee Colony.
Thursday morning at 6AM, I checked in with my Beto bride. I was juggling several other “traditional clients” on my books for rehearsals Wednesday evening, Thursday evening and Friday evening for wedding ceremonies at venues on Saturday and Sunday. I was also apprehensive about how my bride would react to “the glass.”
In fact, I was so worried about my bride that I offered to drive her myself to the Unit. This is rare but, it’s happened. My Estes bride didn’t drive and took a bus from Houston to Fort Worth. I picked her up and took her to breakfast before driving her to Sanders Estes for her ceremony and upon leaving the Unit, had a great time with her at the Botanic Gardens getting some fun bridal photos for her.
I’m different. You will hear me say this over and over because it’s true. I care about my clients and their journey. It’s not an easy journey for TDCJ clients.
At 9:30AM Thursday, I had already been to the post office to mail photos and contracts to clients, filled up my SUV, hit the bank for quarters, met with my Saturday client to go over vendor details and driven through a Starbucks for egg white bites and a non fat latte. My Beto bride was to meet me at 9:30 and leave her car at my home.
The drive to Beto could run two hours and fifteen minutes to two hours and thirty minutes based on traffic and road construction.
Sitting in my SUV and responding to emails regarding Roach, Darrington, Hutchins, Bradshaw and Garza East Units while sipping my latte, I checked the time, 10:01AM. Alarmed, I sent a text to my bride to ask where she was?
A few minutes later, she responded “my son was late to school and I need to leave him with my inlaws. They live in DeSoto.” I quickly checked the distance from DeSoto to Beto and DeSoto to my location to Beto.
There was no way my client could get from DeSoto to me and me to drive to Beto and arrive by 1PM. Because of this, I suggested meeting me at Beto. I would arrive first and if my client was runnng late, explain her tardiness to the wardens secretary. I also immediately left my driveway headed for Beto.
With my preselected stack of cd’s beside me, it would be a day of music from artists with the first name of John. I noticed this before jumping on 20 to head to 287. Usually, I just grab a stack from my case and apparently, my husband had organized cd’s in the order of the first name. I thought I was OCD lol.
From Johnny Cash to John Cougar Mellencamp to John Denver and John Fogerty, I opted for Fogerty and thought about the hearing and lawsuit he had won regarding being himself. For those unaware of the irony or the story, here’s the link– John Fogerty Plagiarism Suit 1988. Plagiarizing himself? How could he be anyone else. The case went before the Supreme Court.
With “Here We Go Rocking All Over The World” blaring on my radio, I jumped onto the highway. I would be “on the dash” because I had planned to leave at 9:30AM with my client. I operate on strict timelines that allow a “cushion.” I’m not a last minute anything type of person.
The drive through Waxahachie is often time consuming due to traffic but, I was making good time and checked in with my client on her GPS estimated arrival time.
Taking several phone calls during my trip, Cindy and Stephaney were at her second interview at Petro. Steve was in New York.
My son was in Arkansas and my husband was back at the “Stinky Skunk Development In Springtown.” Leigh Ann was editing photos for three clients. The skunk development has been an ongoing escapade. Everyone in my husband’s office questions “why Matthew is handling it himself?” John, the builder had never encountered a problem of this magnitude. In fact, no one had. My husband has tried everything to get the smell out of the house and if he can’t, will be the person forced to deal with the homeowner returning from Japan May 4th. The same day I’m out of town with clients and my team. Ugh.
Driving through Eureka, Texas and thinking to myself “there should be an exclamation point after the name,” I check back in with my client. She’s due to arrive at Beto at 12:47PM. I’m rolling in (according to navigation lady) at 12:32PM.
I changed my cd to Elton John and paid attention to the words as I sang along to “let us strive to make a way to make all hatred cease. There’s a man over there. What’s his color? I don’t care. He’s my brother. Let us, let us live in peace” as I rolled on over a long bridge with a peaceful lake that no one is ever using on my trips to Tennessee Colony. Why doesn’t anyone use that lake? I wonder this on every trip across the bridge.
Twenty minutes out from the Unit, I call Cindy before popping in John Cougar and laughing about his “hey, hit the highway!” Its funny to me because I’m always hitting the highway and “finding a lover that won’t drive you crazy” while stating that you want them to “hit the highway” is somewhat offensive and blunt to say the least. It’s also funny. John Cougar is a real character.
The joys of road construction in Tennessee Colony continue. Now the “follow me” truck has moved from Coffield/Michael to Beto/Gurney. Jeez. I call my bride. She’s about ten minutes behind me. I remind her not to speed and get pulled over.
As I stand in the parking area looking for my client, I decide to go to the entrance and alert the tower of my arrival. She arrives a few minutes later looking beautiful in slacks with blonde hair. I wonder if she had colored it since I had last seen her? I love the cut. As usual, I consider growing my hair out and trying to go with a new style but, who are we kidding here? I constantly try to cut my own hair and lack the patience to grow my hair out.
Walking into the Unit, we screen in and wait. As usual, my bra sets off the metal detector and we take a seat. I’d skip the underwire but, I’m far too busty. One day, maybe when I have time, I will get a reduction.
My friendly guard comes to escort us and asks “how is your twin doing?” Cindy’s basement has flooded yet again from heavy rain and I’m headed to Parker County today after filing licenses in Tarrant County to help her mop up. The Daniel Diva house consistently floods in the basement. We’ve had twenty years of flooding at Cindy’s. It’s an ongoing escapade.
Walking in, I look for the phone or a hole under the glass. There isn’t one. The steel mesh above the glass is how the inmate will hear us. It’s difficult to get a clear photo with the glass and the area we are in is somewhat cramped. My client is doing well under the circumstances. She’s not crying or upset.
Leaving the Unit, I suggest stopping at the General Store for her to use the restroom and offer to buy her a cola. I was surprised to hear that she doesn’t consume caffeine and bought her a cranberry juice instead.
We head to my favorite new abandoned building outside Tennessee Colony on the way back to Corsicana. I love the peeling paint and forgotten “look” of this building right off the remote back roads.My bride is joyous the wedding is over and she can now have some fun. Most of my clients have the most fun with me on location photography shoots. As I go through my rolling photo booth switching out props and changing areas, my Saturday client, Brok sends a text to confirm Saturday at 3PM. I answer “my team and I will be there with bells on.”
Brok responds “we are so excited!” My team and I are too. I’ve been looking forward to this wedding and celebration for a month now. They are incorporating hand fasting into their ceremony and I love creative input. Brok and Ruben are so much fun. My bride loved the props I had packed and I asked “how much gas do you have? Do you have to stop for gas on your way back to DeSoto?” She did so I handed her an extra roll of quarters from my SUV and gave her a hug as I headed on to Hodge Unit to meet my next client.
I want only good things for all of my clients. My TDCJ clients often face a difficult journey because they are effectively “pulling the wagon alone.” For many of them, the inmate faces many years but, for my Beto bride, the inmate is due for release in three. I’m happy to hear this because at the very least, she will have an opportunity to experience married life “on the outside.”
A very large percentage of my clients will never have the opportunity. My heart is heavy for the journey they will face without ever having an opportunity to hold their partners hand. Their passion and resilience is unmatched by most couples. The sheer dedication of my clients is amazing. They don’t give up. For them, live isn’t only a four letter word. It’s their life. Love believes all things and bears all things for my TDCJ Clients.
My husband sends a text from his office that cracks me up near Corsicana. The staff had sprinkled powder and purchased a stuffed skunk to surprise him. It’s hard to laugh about the skunk that’s caused so many problems but, my husband did.Hopefully, in the coming week, the smell is resolved before the homeowner returns. My husband saw an Elk near the new home and was amazed at the wildlife out in Springtown. I remind him of my encounter with a black bear on the patio of the lake house in Arkansas. I’m not a “country person.” If I never encounter another bear, I’m “good with it.”
Rolling back onto the highway outside Corsicana, I pop in Melissa Etheridge and “Everybody Has A Hunger No Matter Who They Are.” Melissa is right. I’m hungry for dinner back home and looking forward to sharing supper with Matthew before running off to Marty Leonard Chapel to meet clients.
I hope my clients and connections enjoy a beautiful weekend of sunshine and enjoy a few good times, great music and Spring weather…
This morning while grabbing a quick coffee prior to “hitting the road,” my husband asked me the same question he asks everyday “is there anything I can do for you?” Sounds like a simple question but, the depth and the meaning aren’t overlooked by me. My husband would do anything for me and I know it. The same is true of me for him or my twin sister, my grandnieces, my son, my nieces and my clients.
I’m just as driven, determined and dedicated to making my clients day as worry free and pleasant as possible as I am with my own family.
Everyday is a “no repeat” day. There are no re takes or do overs. Being the best version of yourself might sound silly to anyone who hasn’t faced death. The fragile nature of life is lost on them. It isn’t lost on my twin sister, my husband or our children. Why? Because my twin sister nearly died in an accident at 23 years old.
For fifteen years now, I’ve faced several surgeries to fight “the C word.” I cram as many “moments into each day” as humanly possible. I don’t take any day of my life for granted. Instead, these minutes, these moments, these opportunities are viewed as the gifts they are. I’m “C free” and have been for several years but each and every check up, I literally “brace myself for bad news.” By the grace of God, I haven’t heard any in five years.
Laying out my usual array of CD’s for my drive to TDCJ Coffield Unit, Donna Summer, Elton John, Lenard Skynard, Rod Stewart, Chicago and Jim Croce would be keeping me company on this trip since Cindy was busy in Parker County, Leigh Ann had a booking on the courthouse steps and my son was on his way to Houston.
I don’t mind driving alone on Texas highways or anywhere else for that matter. Music occupies my mind and keeps me company. I know all of the words to all of my favorite CD’s.
My husband only knows the beat or rhythm to music and nearly never pays attention to the words. I find his favorite AC/DC song to be the only song he actually does know the words to hilarious. What is it? Thunder Struck. It cracks me up.
Checking in with my Thursday Beto bride to confirm timelines after passing through Corsicana and hoping rain wouldn’t ruin my Tuesday and Thursday photo shoots after Unit weddings, my 2 hour and fifteen minute trip to Tennessee Colony was running closer to 2 1/2 due to the usual road construction. Heavy sigh.
Sitting in a line of traffic, I had time to review email requests for Goodman Unit, Middleton Unit, Garza East, Ellis, Estelle, Clements, and Dominguez Units. I review at least 5-8 new requests every 2-3 days for prison weddings.
Even I am often surprised at the sheer numbers of clients wanting to marry an inmate. Texas is our highest booking state with California running second and Louisiana third in requests for an Inmate Officiant.
Since I was driving without a copilot, I called the prospective clients back rather than emailing them.
Road construction to Tennessee Colony is a virtual mess of mazes through small towns. I often wonder where everyone works or why people just abandon old farmhouses and leave them to decay. What happened?
In Texas towns that have a Prison, nearly everyone works for TDCJ. The number of employees who have retired and returned to TDCJ is impressive.
One law library clerk told me “2025 is my retirement year and I won’t be coming back like everyone else does. I will leave the bars behind me and find something to do outside of the prison.” I am fairly sure he means it. My husband checked in several times along the way and let me know he had a dentist appointment today. Like me, Matthew hates going to the dentist but, it’s a necessary evil.
Listening to Chicago “being without you takes a lot of getting used to,” I remind my husband to take an Aleve to prevent a headache at the dentist.
I then reminded myself to call Cindy since she’s the one “I was without” on my Tennessee Colony trip.
Cindy doesn’t enjoy riding with me to Tennessee Colony because “there’s nothing to do.” She’s right. There are no shopping centers or cafes and the only drop off point is the General Store. There are five Prisons though and I make the trip here at least twice a month to one or more of the five Tennessee Colony Prisons.
Rolling into Tennessee Colony with my bride a few minutes behind me, I sent my husband the “greeting” sign featuring TDCJ Units located in the city that features only one General Store.
Nearly everyone in the General Store either “knows someone employed by TDCJ or is related to someone employed at one of the Units.”
Five Units house inmates within fairly close proximity of one another in Tennessee Colony. Coffield and Michael are both located behind the same guard entrance gate. The close proximity of Coffield and Michael are convenient for me because I can move from Coffield wedding ceremonies starting at 9AM to Michael which usually schedules me in at 10:30 or later which is how I literally “bounce” from Coffield to Michael with fluid frequency to meet my clients and conduct their wedding ceremony.
Often I “stack” clients if I have more than one client at the same Unit with thirty minute intervals for each client. After I complete wedding ceremonies at Units, my clients and I find a place for their bridal photos.
Bouncing from Coffield or Michael to Beto or Gurney wouldn’t be quite as convenient as you would need to leave the Coffield/Michael Units to drive “back through town” and down another two lane road to get to Beto, Gurney or Powledge.
Coffield and Michael schedule inmate weddings on Tuesdays. Other Tennessee Colony Units prefer Thursday’s. I’m in Tennessee Colony so often that I could literally drive it blindfolded. In fact, I’m back in Tennessee Colony on Thursday. This time at Beto then on to Hodge Unit. Hodge Unit is in Rusk, Texas and forty five miles from Beto.
I’ve left Tennessee Colony Units to drive to Huntsville Units on more than a few occasions. Huntsville is also a city of Prisons and one hundred and two miles from Tennessee Colony. It’s a very long day to leave Fort Worth to Tennessee Colony to Huntsville but, it’s doable.
I’ve spent up to eighteen hours driving from Unit A to Unit B and occasionally even Unit C before heading back to Fort Worth to rise and shine at 3AM and start all over again. Whatever I can do to keep from renting a hotel for prison weddings, I do during the week as weekends often find me at Destination Events and staying at hotels. With my schedule, finding time to be home at night and see my family during wedding season is difficult at best but, I give it my best shot. Having a copilot helps tremendously as my twin and I take turns driving to locations over 6 hours from the DFW area.
Arriving at Coffield Unit, I was thrilled to see my beautiful bride wearing a wedding dress. This is a rare treat. I loved the entire ensemble. Her bouquet was perfect match to her dress.
Although my bride wasn’t allowed to bring her bouquet into the Unit, I couldn’t wait to incorporate it into her bridal photos after we left Coffield Unit. Her smile said it all.
My TDCJ clients are nervous, excited and exhilarated to finally be getting married. It’s a long and arduous process. Michael Unit won’t allow dresses or skirts of ANY TYPE inside the Unit. Advising my Michael Unit brides that only slacks are allowed isn’t an easy conversation but, it is necessary. The Rule at Michael is unbending.
The “wait” at Coffield is always surprising. Occasionally you can “get right in” while other times the wait can run anywhere from 1-3 hours inside the Unit. My bride and I checked in together at 8:50AM for a 9:00AM scheduled wedding ceremony. I had expected to be out of Coffield by 10 at the latest. Instead, it would be after 11 before we finally walked out of the Unit together.
“Screening in” can be a time consuming ordeal. I always screen in first. I decided that while my bride was being screened, I would head to the Wardens Office to sign in and pay for Unit photos at $3 each. I always buy three photos for my clients as a courtesy.
Luckily, I had bought 2 rolls of quarters rather than one since I’m at Beto on Thursday as my Tuesday bride had forgotten her quarters and realized it in the parking lot. To solve the problem, I emptied my Beto quarters into the Coffield baggie to cover us for 6 photos at Coffield. I’m nothing if not prepared.
I can (and will) get quarters for Beto on my way to Erath County on Wednesday for Beto on Thursday.
I never go to a Prison without quarters. Often my client may forget to bring quarters for photos and a wedding ceremony is the one event where clients want as many photos as they can get although the quality of the photos is often “questionable.”
If we all have our heads in the photo, it’s a good day. Guards are not professional photographers and “you get what you get.”
Amazingly, Estes Unit by far has the best Unit photos. This is saying a lot from me because all of my clients want Unit photos.
Privately owned Units rarely (if ever) offer wedding day photos. Sanders Estes takes the best Prison photos I’ve seen from any Prison in Texas.
Sanders Estes is also the only Unit where a guest or guests have been allowed to witness the ceremony. Sanders Estes UnitSanders Estes Unit
Clear or “in focus” photos are rare at Prison Weddings. Allred actually runs a close second with Hodge Unit coming in third regarding photo clarity and quality. Allred UnitHodge UnitBeto Unit
Back to the waiting area at Coffield, my client and I would continue to wait while another bride waited on her “other Officiant.”
I’m well aware of this “other Officiant” because she is almost always late and always unfriendly. I pay little or no attention to her intentionally although I WISH she would pay more attention to her clients and arrive on time.
The entire Unit accommodates prison weddings and her work ethics are embarrassing and inconvenient to not only her own clients but also myself and my clients who are “effectively forced to wait on her to ride in on her broom with an attitude.” Prison Weddings aren’t planned overnight. The process is time consuming and stressful to clients who anxiously await wedding day.
From start to finish, planning a Prison wedding can take anywhere from three weeks to months. The “person on the outside” will send an Absentee Affidavit and the “person on the inside” will request a TDCJ ID that can take several weeks.
Once the “person on the inside” has the Absentee Affidavit and ID Notarized, the “person on the outside” will use both documents to purchase the marriage license. The “person on the inside” will then file an I60 Request For Marriage Form listing the TDCJ Approved Officiant on the paperwork.
The I60 requires up to 6 signatures. Once approved, the Warden will hand the chaplain the paperwork to set the date and time for the marriage. The TDCJ Officiant will then confirm the date and time assigned. I.E. Prison wedding planning is a lengthy process.
One of my clients, Mary, waited months to get approved for her wedding. Another, JoJo, waited over a year. Still another waited six months at Stiles Unit. Part of the issues these clients faced that made their journey more difficult involved Unit transfers or a CLM status or other “hiccups.” I spend months walking each of my TDCJ client facing “hurdles” through a confusing process. I also become everyone’s mother when a Prison wedding has hurdles.
I spend FAR more time talking or corresponding with TDCJ Clients than I ever will with a Texas Twins Events, Pawning Planners or other client booked through a venue that I’m on staff with. Prison Wedding Planning is by far more complicated than a “traditional wedding.”
On weekends and evenings, I’m often working with “traditional clients” or on site at a venue when a call from a TDCJ client may come in. I juggle everyone everyday and return calls every 2-3 hours.
My “job” never ends with any of my clients because they offer re book with myself and my staff for other services including Vow Renewals upon release of the inmate or Baptisms and these clients ALWAYS refer their friends and family to my staff and I. We have earned our reputation of excellence by exceeding our clients expectations. These clients are like family to my staff and I. They are far more than a “Gig” or “Booking.”
Waiting on “another Officiant” is the last thing any client needs on wedding day. Having everyone else on site for their wedding wait on “another Officiant” who obviously has a blatant disregard for everyone else’s time continues to infuriate me.
The “other Officiant” needs to buy a watch or find a new business that isn’t based on being timely, organized or articulate.
At Allred, my clients and I were forced to wait yet again due to this same “other Officiant.” It’s aggravating to me that people don’t view being late as stealing because it is. You are taking something you cannot replace. These brides or grooms have waited months on their wedding day.
The last thing anyone wants to do on wedding day is to wait on “another Officiant” who is unprofessional and uncaring. When “another Officiant” consistently being tardy to a Unit subsequently forces my clients and I to wait on their arrival for my clients wedding ceremony to take place, such conduct annoys my clients as well as pissing me off at the same time. Some people take no pride in their work ethics.
Hire someone with a stellar track record and responsible behavior. It will save you a lot of grief. It can also save you money. How? Well, if you’ve hired someone who doesn’t return your calls or answer your emails, you might very well have also hired someone so unreliable (obviously not affiliated with Texas Twins Events) that they won’t bother to show up on wedding day!
How do I know about NO SHOWS? Because I’ve been hired as second and even the third Officiant or Planner or BOTH over and over for years by clients who had “hired the wrong vendor to begin with.”
That’s right. I’ve taken calls from hysterical brides or their mothers or members of the wedding party for YEARS who found themselves wishing the had hired Texas Twins Events in the first place but instead, found themselves ALONE at a Unit or venue with a MIA Officiant or Planner (obviously not affiliated in any way, shape or form with my staff).
These “emergency requests at the 11th hour” have been going on for so many years now that I now have emergency fees in place based on our availability. After all, my staff and I DON’T HAVE EMERGENCIES. The client who hired the WRONG VENDOR is HAVING AN EMERGENCY.
I will never forget the TCU wedding party calling me years ago about “two hundred guests waiting and we can’t get in touch with our Officiant. We need someone here as soon as possible.” I had been working on a Texas Twins Treasures trunk and obviously unprepared to “run off and save the day” but, due to the hysterical phone call, changed my clothes and dashed over to the church.
Arriving with everyone upset and agitated, I had no idea what they wanted for their ceremony, names of the wedding party, who was giving the bride away or anything else for that matter. Also and more importantly, who was paying MY FEE? Upon inquiring about my fee in the midst of the circus environment of chaos, I was told “we didn’t bring any money because we paid the other Officiant.”
Oh, you mean the person who DIDN’T bother showing up? I advised the wedding party of the facts since paying the No Show Officiant doesn’t benefit me one iota. “I received a hysterical phone call on my day off begging me to drop everything and run over here to save YOUR wedding. If you don’t have funding to pay my fee, I will be leaving now and ya all can have a great party.”
Turning to leave, someone managed to come up with my fee. I am not a volunteer. I’m a staunch professional who effectively “goes to work” in exchange for consideration. If you have no money, you can submit a bartered item proposal through my sister site, The Pawning Planners.
After the “TCU incident,” and similar escapades that included excuses pertaining to paying the “other Officiant” that prevented these hysterical folks from paying me or anyone in my staff who ACTUALLY DID SHOW UP when the initial vendor hired and more importantly, PAID DID NOT, all of my sites were updated with “emergency fee structures” as well as holiday fees. I don’t have emergencies and no one on my Team does either.
I abhor tardiness. Worse, are the “consistently tardy people” who assume that by being tardy that their behavior is acceptable to everyone else who are effectively forced to wait on them.
I’m never late. Ever. I leave a minimum of 30 minutes to an hour earlier than necessary for every commitment I have. I plan ahead. Not showing up at an event? NEVER. But, I’m not like everyone else. My staff aren’t either. Our booked clients are OUR PRIORITY.
Since the other Officiant was MIA and most likely running 20-30 minutes late (as usual), her client was alone and feeling somewhat insecure about “screening in” since the alarm kept going off when she attempted to “clear in.”
The “hold up” at screening due to the other client bringing a ring box and ring into the Unit. Ring boxes have metal hinges. Metal interferes with the metal detector. Whether it’s jewelry, a watch, a girdle with boning or a bra with underwire or even a ring box, YOU MUST CLEAR the machine to enter ANY TDCJ UNIT.
I strongly advise all of my clients not to bring anything other than their current state issued ID, Marriage License, car keys and quarters. It will save you and I time screening in and make our visit far more pleasant on wedding day.
Having someone walk in bewildered and alone while wondering if their “other Officiant” is going to bother showing up is just too much for me. I often wish they had someone reliable in their corner during what is often already an emotional process but, again, I cannot save everyone from hiring the wrong Officiant. I’ve seen it happen before and I will see it happen again. I’m not only referring to Prisons either.
My office “fields” emergency Officiant calls on a regular basis because someone hired the wrong Officiant, Photographer or Planner. You know, the “other Officiant or vendor who were paid to show up but didn’t.”
Getting a call from a frantic bride, groom, mother of the bride or groom to one of our Texas Twins Events cell phones from someone in a panic because “our Officiant didn’t show up” or “our planner isn’t here” or “our photographer isn’t here and we need you to send someone over immediately” are the types of phone calls no one wants to take.
Don’t these frantic callers assume that we aren’t already on location? You know with the clients who booked with us. We can’t save everyone. What we can do is put our clients needs first and if I have any available staff, send them to the “emergency” caller. But, these emergency services come at a higher rate. Also, emergency services are based entirely on availability. Our clients don’t have emergencies because they booked with Texas Twins Events.
I’m booked up to 2 years out and no longer take on emergency Officiant bookings. The reason for this is that you are effectively “going in cold” with clients you know nothing about who are often angry, anxious and upset because “someone else” had let them down. It’s an awful situation for the client who trusted the “wrong person” but again, I cannot save everyone. My staff cannot save everyone. Our priorities are our booked clients first and foremost. Everyone else is secondary.
Emergency Officiant situations are redirected to my staff and their availability. I work 7 days a week and can’t run off from my existing clients “to save the day” for a “stranger” simply because they ask me to.
I strongly urge people who have been wronged AKA “STOOD UP” by another vendor to get a refund before calling Texas Twins Events and expecting us to drop everything because “we help everyone.” We help people who hired us in the first place. File a small claims lawsuit against the person who knowingly and willfully “ruined your wedding day.” Why? Because you paid them to show up that’s why. You trusted them to honor their end of the bargain and they failed you. This my friends is called “Breach of Oral or Implied Contract.” It you have paid for a service you didn’t receive, it’s also called “Theft Of Services.” Study up and know your rights as a consumer.
Booked clients take precedence over anyone else coming to us at the 11th hour in a panic because they initially hired someone else. Not OUR luggage- Not OUR trip.
No one on my staff has ever and I mean never will not been on site at a booked event. It will never happen in my lifetime. I have a full staff for this very reason. If someone becomes ill, there is always a backup that will not be scheduled on the same day. I have never missed a booking in my life, if I’m sick, I go to the ER or Urgent Care and get a shot before heading to my booking or after my job is through.
At Sanders Estes Unit, I had three brides and immense pain. Why? Kidney stones. I waited hours to go to the ER to ensure my clients needs were met first. I was also flying to California 36 hours after this photo was taken and terrified my pain was due to a ruptured appendix but, my bloody urine actually eased my mind. Kidney stones again. Ugh.
Would I have gotten on that plane following an appendectomy? Yes. Against doctors orders I would have. I would also have sought medical treatment in California if I experienced any complications from surgery in Texas. But, by the Grace of God, my pain wasn’t due to my appendix. My smile on the railroad tracks literally masks my discomfort. No one has the work ethics that I possess other than my twin sister, Cindy.
There are no sick days or emergencies in the events industry. Whatever is going on in my life or my staffs lives takes a backseat to our clients needs. There’s always an ER or Urgent Care facility open after hours.
“Work ethics AND morals are like a good set of tires. Everything you have is riding on them.”
Cindy Daniel
The ring at Coffield shouldn’t have been there. Since many of my clients inquire about rings, I’m going to go over Section K of the Administrative Directive because the question regarding rings comes up frequently with my TDCJ Clients.
I’ve memorized the Administrative Directive and no, I don’t call wardens and ask them to make exceptions because they are running a Prison and very busy and also because as a TDCJ Officiant, it’s expected that we know and understand the rules and guidelines set forth pertaining to inmate marriage and, I do.
Offender property prevents ring exchanges and yet… the other bride was unaware of the limitations that would require her to leave the Unit with the ring she had brought.
I suggested that the guard remove the ring from the box setting off the metal detector and that the bride wear the ring herself as I also explained to this young bride that wedding ring exchanges are strictly forbidden. The bride then told me “the Warden said I could put it on but I would have to take it off when I left.” Oh, so someone called a Warden to ask to bring a wedding ring into the Unit although it’s unauthorized? Wow. It’s tough to surprise me but, calling a Warden to ask for something because it isn’t allowed isn’t a good idea. In fact, it’s something that I strongly suggest no one does.
I’m just going to put this out there because giving someone a ring on wedding day only to have to remove it and effectively “take it back” is perhaps even more emotionally traumatic than not presenting it in the first place but, that’s my opinion.
My clients are strongly advised against calling the Warden to ask for something that’s prohibited in the first place. It’s far better to follow the Administrative Directive. That’s why there is one put in place giving inmates the right to marry in TDCJ Units.
By the time my client and I were called to go to the Visitation Area, my bride and I were more than ready to “get the show on the road.” After all, we had been waiting for quite some time and having the “other Officiant” haughtily stare at me enjoying a conversation with not only my client but also her own client was more than a little awkward for her I’m guessing.
I can talk to anyone and I can certainly befriend anyone who is unaware that a ring box is going to set off the machine. “Clearing” a machine is essential to entering the Unit. Whether you need to disrobe, take your hair down, remove a ring from the box or whatever else is setting off the machine, compliance is required. My bride had to take her beautiful updo down. It’s very distressing on wedding day but, clearing the machine isn’t “optional.”
Walking through the heavy doors into the visitation area, I decided to use both backdrops for photos because lighting is often an issue at Coffield. I wanted my bride to have the best possible photos from her wedding.
The groom was nervous and thrilled to see his bride. These moments are emotional. My client and her beau have been through phone calls, confusing paperwork and long wait times to stand with me to marry. They are excited and yet, apprehensive. No one knows what to expect. I lay out the rules. “You can hold hands. You can hug. You can kiss twice but no open mouth. No groping. We will be respectful and stay within the guidelines.” I also remind both parties “although this wedding is taking place inside a prison, once I sign and file this license, you are legally married and dissolving your union will require a divorce. Do you both agree to continue?” They always do. I’ve never had anyone change their mind on wedding day but, I have had a few people hyperventilate and even vomit. I’m not specifically speaking only about Prisons either. I’ve seen pretty much everything in my years of the events industry.
My hair was a mess with humidity and my usual ponytail pulled most of it out of my face. I had cut my bangs again while waiting on a client at Green Bay Unit and as usual, messed my hair up AGAIN. I need to throw my cuticle scissors out of my SUV and stop taking whacks at my bangs but, for years I’ve been guilty of attempting to cut my own bangs and botching it. Time is something I don’t have.
My couple looked fantastic and although the groom was a little nervous, he relaxed before posing for photos.
My bride was a delight in every way. I love my clients. My “client” is the person on the outside. This confuses people but shouldn’t. The person on the outside is responsible for finding their TDCJ Approved Officiant. I don’t advertise and I never have.
Frankly, my reputation is why and how I stay booked. Referral business is a gift. If you are doing your job right, you won’t need to advertise. Moving over to the other backdrop across the visitation area, the groom wanted to see the license after I had signed it. Occasionally, the groom or bride want to view the license and I found this to be a “sweet moment.” I had no idea that this wedding had been something the couple had planned for years. The reason the groom wanted to see my signature was to know “the deal was done.”
My bride had told me something that was not only real but also raw with honesty as we stood waiting on a guard to unlock the heavy steel door. I turned to face her as she said “Wendy, I’m doing time too while he’s in here. For years I’ve thought I can’t keep doing this. He has to want to get it together and, he finally does.” She was absolutely right. I thought of the line in a song on one of my cd’s and just as the heavy steel door was being unlocked “I can’t wait upon a lovers cross for you” Jim Croce. No one can wait upon a lovers cross forever. I understood completely what my bride had meant.
The person on the outside is a warrior. They make all of the sacrifices. My bride had waited because she wanted light at the end of the tunnel and I pray she finds it.
Her new husband went before parole last week and I’m hoping he makes it. I love happy endings and will also be officiating their Vow Renewal upon his release and looking forward to seeing them both again.
I had packed my make up kit but had no time to put on any make up other than lipstick which is why I wore my “no make up” tinted glasses. Time. I have so little of it. I live every moment and I love working. I love meeting new people and I love my job.
I now have 3 pairs of glasses for my “on the dash” days where lipstick and a smile are all I have time for. Makeup? Who has ten minutes for that? I know I didn’t. My bride and I said goodbye to her new husband and walked back to wait another hour near the metal detector. Why? Because the second bride and “other Officiant” were buying photos too and rather than print our photos first, the guard was back in the Visitation Area with the same camera and SD card. It would’ve been far more convenient (for us anyway) to print our photos first but, we wait patiently.
My client and I would wait on the other bride who would come out to wait alone with my client and I on her own photos while the “other Officiant” stomped off and walked right out of Unit leaving her client to wait alone. I felt sad for her. Sitting alone and abandoned after waiting on that “other Officiant” she was now watching leave as my client and I waited with her on the wardens secretary to print out our photos first.
Weddings aren’t a “drive through.” I was glad my client and I were there to keep the other bride entertained with some good company.
Life Events aren’t “on the dash” and yet, arriving late and leaving early, the “other Officiants” behavior didn’t surprise me at all. Frankly, I’m used to it with this “other Officiant.” I always feel sorry for her clients. She doesn’t care about how important their “moment is.” She doesn’t take into consideration how long they’ve waited or what they went through to get to their wedding day. It’s a tragedy.
I can only imagine how lonely a long drive to a Unit for a Prison wedding would be. Driving home after a Prison wedding without your new spouse by your side? Even lonelier.
I had wished the other bride was able to join my client and I to celebrate her wedding and take photos with us but, I can’t save everyone.
My role is with my client. I must address the person standing in front of me although I’m old and wise enough to see how so many things that could make a day brighter for others would only take a moment of compassion, care or understanding if only the person they had hired would make more of an effort. Sigh.
Driving to Tennessee Colony, I had seen an old building I wanted to use as our backdrop and my client followed me as the mist turned to rain. No matter. My hair was already a mess.
I love how these photos turned out! My beauty and I braved the rain and had a great time together. My bride was a natural and I always try to find a unique background to give photos depth and this building was perfect.
As we both wiped the rain off our faces and I changed signs and floral arrangements, I was so glad to have the opportunity to capture my clients joy on film.
I had told the groom that I would send my beautiful bride double prints in order for him to have a set. God Bless this beautiful lady and as always, I’m honored to meet such incredible and resilient people who overcome any and all obstacles to make their relationship work.
I’ve got jam packed few months ahead and wish all of my clients, friends and followers many minutes and moments of joy. They are out there ya all. Grab them. We are all on a short window. Tomorrow is but a promise.
Take a moment to smell the flowers or grab a coffee. Remember that clients are people too. They aren’t numbers. Put yourself in their shoes and I can assure you that you will make them feel as important as you would like to be treated yourself. My clients are worth it to me. They are the fabric of my life.
Don’t forget to put your needs in the same order of importance as the people you care about. I’m hoping to find time to get my hair cut…
Leaving Fort Worth Tuesday morning at 3:45AM with my twin sister complaining “we should have left at 3:30,” the Texas Twins hit the highway.
It would be at least two hours before Cindy’s twin granddaughters, Maryssa and Makenna even began to roll out of bed in Weatherford, Texas at Cindy’s home. Cindy’s daughter, Leigh Ann would call complaining about Maryssa running late somewhere between 6AM and 6:30AM. How do I know? It happens each and every time we have a “red eye run” to a distant Unit.
Cindy’s husband, Steve is a long haul truck driver who is rarely home more than one day a week. I can give Steve a mile marker and he often knows exactly where we are in Texas. Steve literally has been down pretty much every road in the US and Canada the last fifty years of driving.
Cindy always spends the night with me when we are headed off to a Texas Prison before daybreak.
Our destination? McConnell Unit in Beeville, Texas. McConnell is located near Garza East and Garza West as well as being in close proximity to Connally Unit.
Texas Department Of Criminal Justice operates numerous state owned facilities. There are a few privately owned prisons in Texas as well as Federal and ICE Detention Centers. TDCJ oversees both state and privately owned facilities. Texas ranks first in the nation regarding the number of people incarcerated. It’s a shocking statistic.
TDCJ McConnell Unit is a little over five hours one way from my location in Westover Hills, Texas. A few months ago, Cindy and I made the journey to McConnell in exactly five hours. My Tuesday bride had opted to stay at a hotel as my previous McConnell Unit bride had.
It’s rare for Cindy and I to book a hotel for a number of reasons. First, Cindy has the Twins at home. I have a husband and feisty Beagle as well as numerous commitments with venues that I’m on staff at and Client bookings for Texas Twins Events and The Pawning Planners. Destination trips can get tricky so whenever possible, I skip booking a hotel.
My Tuesday bride and her soon to be sister in law were meeting us at Goodwill in Beeville where I would drop Cindy to search for bargains while I was at McConnell at 9:30AM. McConnell was a 6-8 minute drive from Goodwill.
I always find a nearby location for Cindy to “junk shop” for an hour or two. Flipped items are listed at our storefront where Texas Twins Treasures items are sold worldwide. The inventory can either be refurbished items originally taken in trade through The Pawning Planners or something Cindy and I have found in another state at a Destination Event or at a resale shop near a Texas Prison. We know what we are looking for. How? Cindy and I have been “flipping items” since we were in our 20’s.
Cindy and I have thirty years of resale experience that when combined with our extensive product knowledge from dueling careers in sales, makes us both knowledgeable appraisers. It is rare for my twin and I to “take a hit on a flip, swap or trade.” We have had a few “bust barters” but, they were learning curves. Like anyone else, we learn from mistakes.
I no longer accept non running vehicles that require a hefty investment on our end through The Pawning Planners. Such barters have frequently and nearly always “bitten us in the a$$.” When you lose money on a barter- you remember why and how you “took a hit” and are subsequently, far more cautious. We are.
Many people are surprised to learn that we not only barter but that “we do Prison Weddings.” Often, our traditional clients will call or email during the week while Cindy or I are driving to or from a Texas Prison. The cell reception on back roads is always the “first clue.” My phone never stops ringing. Brok had called about his upcoming wedding while we were headed to Beeville and wanted to incorporate hand written vows. Asking if “I had time to talk?” I advised him that we had at least two hours to talk since we were driving to a Prison. I’m really looking forward to finally meeting Brok and his fiancée next week. I always take client calls while driving. It’s truly the only time I’m not juggling a client standing in front of me or emailing me. In any given month outside wedding season, I can be juggling 10-20 clients. In season? Upwards of 20-25 booked clients while fielding new client requests on a daily basis.
Between Texas Twins Events and TDCJ Weddings, I literally HAD TO add more staff to address our burgeoning client bases. Our growth has stunned others. After all, I’ve never advertised. “How does she do it?” Well, when I started Texas Twins Events, I priced our services far below our competition. When a few people still couldn’t afford to book with us, I rebranded and expanded by merging Texas Twins Events and Texas Twins Treasures to create the barter option of The Pawning Planners. When someone came to me because she couldn’t find anyone to marry her at a Texas Prison, I AGAIN expanded Texas Twins Events to include Texas Prison Weddings. Exceeding client expectations has earned us referral businesss each and every year we’ve been in business. Previous clients re book for Vow Renewal Ceremonies upon release of their loved one from a Texas Prison or a Baptism, birthday party, Quincinera or even Memorial for a family member. It’s not uncommon for a previous client or one of their family members to book several times for different events with us. In fact, it’s quite common. Previous clients become threads of our journey and the door never closes.
I’m not a “country person” although many assume that Cindy and I were born and raised in Texas. Cindy and I were born in California. We’ve left Texas twice to move to California and back again as adults.
For a number of years, I kept a home in San Clemente and Fort Worth. For another number of years, I kept a home on Beaver Lake in Arkansas and another in Fort Worth. I’m out of the vacation home in another state business. Everyone wants to stay at your “vacation home” at your expense. I now book Cindy and I or my Team at luxury hotels instead and let someone wait on me instead. Don’t be offended. I’m honest. Having a holiday home is the biggest way to have everyone and their dog wanting to “stay at your other home” while you are working your a$$ off to pay for it. The lake house was an ongoing escapade of “friends” not only borrowing the house but also the boats and eating the food without replacing it or putting gas in the boats. I will never own another lake home unless of course it’s my primary residence. I don’t need friends who use me for their benefit.
I’ve traveled the world extensively and prefer to live near the heart of the city. Cindy and I are Compensating Personality Twins. My twin grandnieces are as well.
I’m always asked what “Compensating Personality” means. Literally though the definition means two halves make a whole. If you are unfamiliar with Compensating Personality Multiples, I’m adding a link– Twin Studies Compensating Personalities.
Why one twin would be more driven or bossy while the other twin is more complacent or happy to go along with the stronger minded twin continues to be something that confuses scientists.
Part of the issue is that many assume that identical twins are identical thinkers. This isn’t true in our case, Cindy’s twin granddaughters case or any of the nine other sets of twins in our family.
Also, for the many who assume that twins aren’t genetic, Twins have been born every other generation on both sides of our family for over 200 years. Identical twins are genetic. Fraternal twins are not.
Identical twins are almost always “closer” than fraternal twins although the variation has been studied over and over again.
Twin studies are “big business.” My twin grandnieces love gift cards and other “perks” for being involved in twin research.
Cindy and I have very little time to devote to twin studies although on a weekly, monthly and yearly basis, a researcher will contact us begging for Cindy and I to spend hours filling out questionnaires.
A far better approach would be for researchers to call Cindy and I while we are spending hours driving together to a Texas, Louisiana, Oklahoma, Arkansas, California or other state Prison.
Neither Cindy or I have the time or the inclination to spend hours we don’t have filling out forms regardless of what the “perk” offered might be. Why? Cindy and I work seven days a week. Cindy and I juggle TDCJ Clients, Texas Twins Treasures Clients, Texas Twins Events Clients and Pawning Planners Clients. Time is priceless to Cindy and I.
Cindy is funny, witty and never without something to say. I am far more reserved, reflective and detail oriented. Together, we are the perfect team.
My sister and I are happiest when we are together and due to our unique ability to “merge our talents,” capable of overcoming damn near anything on location. Wherever that location might be. Our mini me twins, Maryssa and Makenna closely mirror Cindy and I. Maryssa isn’t driven and far more social than Makenna. Makenna is a stellar student and far less interested in having a social circle.
Maryssa and Makenna have worked with our clients since they were two years old as flower girls, ring bearers & ushers. At fourteen, they now book with clients as princess characters for fundraisers and birthday parties to “save money for their first car.”
The “tiny Texas twins” are no longer tiny and are now taller than Cindy and I. Maryssa and Makenna are both comfortable on camera and have been filmed for numerous media projects.
Maryssa and Makenna are by far “lighter skinned” than Cindy or I. The reason for this is that our grandfather was a full blood Cherokee Indian and also, an identical twin. Our grandmother was Scottish with milky white skin, green eyes and red hair. I’ve been asked “why do most of your businesses have the word twin in them?” The reason is that we are a twin family.
Cindy and I “came up with” the name Texas Twins Events moments before my surgery at Baylor Hospital. Not expecting to survive, I had told my twin “if this doesn’t kill me, I’m hanging up my courthouse heels and doing something I enjoy.” Cindy had asked me “what would it be?”
Thinking about a great way to have fun and meet people that my twin could join me doing while also bringing her twin granddaughters with her, I decided to create a People Over Profit based business and, Texas Twins Events was born.
Cindy had given up “her day job” to take on the responsibility of raising her twin granddaughters fourteen years ago. Isolated and overwhelmed, Cindy needed a way to get out of the house and we created one.
Within one week of my website going LIVE, Discovery Communications contacted me. The difference between Texas Twins Events and other event vendors was significant. Why? We helped anyone. We didn’t care what made you different or if you had extraordinary circumstances. We became the people we had never met.
Our versatility was based entirely on our own experience when planning our weddings.
We didn’t have family or friends to help us years ago and subsequently, became the people we wished we had known but had never met. We are “different” and “being different” is also why we are so successful. Our success surprises people but, as children, we learned at a young age that caring about someone else’s journey was rare. Why try to be like everyone else? That market was saturated.
Driving to McConnell, Cindy and I took calls and checked up on the twins. Cindy’s daughter, Leigh Ann was texting photos she had edited from the weekend before at a wedding and complaining that “Maryssa was making everyone late again.” Cindy and I both did an eye roll.
Midway through our drive to Beeville, I had Cindy screen shot a navigation pic to my beautiful bride to let her know where we were and that we would be arriving between 9:15AM and 9:30AM at Goodwill in Beeville.
Rolling onto the 130 HWY with a posted speed limit of 85MPH, Cindy laughed and said “only in Texas.” I’m not comfortable driving 85MPH although for many years I was a General Motors Certified salesperson familiar with Ride and Drives and various vehicles.
At one XLR-V Ride and Drive in Texas, my driver amped up the speed to 120MPH. Was I comfortable at that speed? Not really. I prefer to drive 70-75MPH quite frankly because stopping distance and other factors are involved.
Put me in an evening gown next to an XLR and I’m far more comfortable. I don’t enjoy “going real fast” in anything. I’m a safe driver because I don’t take risks.
“Every Valero gas station restroom looks the same.” Cindy has become a public restroom connoisseur. It’s rare to “wow us” with an exceptionally clean rest area or public bathroom but, it has happened. The rest area near Huntsville, Texas is sparkling clean but, also has a rooster chasing you around. Once again, only in Texas! Cindy and I always laugh about the Huntsville rest area.
Rolling into Beeville, Leigh Ann calls to see if “we’ve looked at the photos she sent to our phones?” I pull over and take a quick look. It’s 9:03AM and I’m two minutes from Goodwill and our meeting point.
The bride (a traditional client) wasn’t comfortable about wearing a tiara. I talked her into it. Her mother however, loved the idea! I have amassed an inventory specifically to loan clients for photo shoots. Why? So they don’t have to buy items they will only use once. I know, it’s different but, I’m different. I care remember?
“Creating an inventory to LOAN CLIENTS AT YOUR OWN EXPENSE? ARE YOU CRAZY?” No, I’m not crazy but I am committed to “changing the wedding and events industry one client or barter at a time from Fort Worth, Texas.” The smile on the bride “wearing her very first tiara” thrilled me.I buy tiaras from many countries in numerous colors. I also either create my own bouquets or buy them. My rolling photo booth can also feature clothing from one of my 6 closets, boas, mink coats, jewelry, and more.
Unloading one of our suvs while a surprised and delighted client sees everything we’ve brought to make their photo shoot special is a sight to behold.
My McConnell bride jumped into my SUV and together we drove to the Unit. Every TDCJ Client is nervous at a Prison Wedding.
Whether I’m in Texas or another state officiating a Prison Wedding, I’ve yet to meet a client who wasn’t a bit apprehensive. Why? Because no one “plans” to marry inside a Prison.
In August, Texas Twins Events Prison Weddings will be expanding into California. My niece, Leigh Ann will handle California Prison Weddings as well as photography and traditional bookings. Cindy and I will continue to address Destination Events and occasionally, if needed, I will continue to handle a few California Prison Wedding bookings myself. Yes, I’ve officiated numerous “high profile” Prison Weddings and many of these particular clients only want me to handle their Prison Wedding Planning Process and subsequent ceremony.
Before anyone starts panicking that I won’t be performing California Prison Weddings or Destination Bookings with Cindy, calm down kids, I’m still going to book in California but, we need someone living in California and that someone is Leigh Ann. My niece enjoys working with all types of clients and is looking forward to her move. Leigh Ann will be based out of Oxnard, California. My niece is also a Notary, experienced photographer and TDCJ Officiant and enjoys creating memorable ceremonies and moments with clients.
I personally trained Leigh Ann and know she will thrill you with her stellar work ethics. When needed, Leigh Ann will fly back and forth to Fort Worth for Client photography bookings in Texas. Leigh Ann is always the “first choice for photography” bookings although my son and his wife also do their own photography and Officiant packages. Cindy and I will continue to do our own photos with TDCJ Clients and are buying new equipment to begin offering professional photography with either Cindy or myself handling your photos at traditional bookings. Leigh Ann is training my twin and I about professional photography before leaving for California.
My McConnell groom had written his own vows. I love creative input. It makes the Wedding Ceremony far more personal and unique.Visiting with the Chaplain and guards in the visitation area while my clients had a few moments for a visit after the wedding ceremony, I was thrilled to learn that one of the guards was from Fort Worth and familiar with TCGPWA and the parade.
Every year, Texas Twins Events and my Team look forward to being sponsors of the parade and seeing all of our friends in the LBGT Community. Leaving the Unit, I check in with Cindy and head back to Goodwill. As usual, Cindy has a shopping cart full of treasures. I rarely list new items at Texas Twins Events “in season” because I simply don’t have the time.
Instead, during the winter months, Cindy and I walk our storage units and pull silk flowers to create new bouquets and pick or choose items to either send out to refurbish or list as is.
Unloading my SUV, my bride and her new sister in law are thrilled with the wide array of options I had left packed in my main SUV from the Saturday wedding.
Everyone loves my tiaras. I have several more coming that are currently in customs and ladies, ya all are going to love them! Leaving the photo shoot, I check in with my husband regarding the “Stinky Skunk Development.” For weeks now, Matthew has been trying to remove the smell of skunk from his Springtown, Texas development. I’ve bounced ideas while he has sent crews to tear out walls, the bathtub and even hired someone to leave ozone machines. So far, every effort has failed.
Cindy googles for a solution that we haven’t tried yet. I order something on Amazon wondering whether it will work or not? The amount of money spent on trying to solve this “stinky problem” would shock you.
Although I had suggested not replacing the tub, yesterday my husband had to tub pulled and ordered a new one. The skunk had somehow gotten under the tub and died but not before spraying a wide area in the master bath.
My husband is depressed trying to find a solution for the “Stinky Springtown Skunk” issue. After all, in fifty years this is a situation that he has never encountered yet.
Matthew will be relieved when we finally close out the Springtown Development and effectively say goodbye to the skunk problem. It will be a “two-fer.”
Being a builder and developer isn’t an “easy job” but, my husband has far more patience than I do. Matthew can effectively “draw a development on a cocktail napkin.” He sees possibility in a field. I see a field.
My husband tries to explain why “keeping those trees and leaving nature is the best way to develop land” while I prefer to stay safely in the SUV while he walks the land. I worry about poison ivy while my husband puts on hiking boots. I’m not really a “nature walking type of person.”
In fact, I didn’t even own a pair of sneakers until after marrying my husband. We were in Austin, Texas “walking” a possible development. I was wearing Stuart Weitzman high heeled sandals. I will never forget trying to navigate my way while stylishly attired through a forest and my husband probably won’t either.
My husband had laughingly asked “are you going to walk this property in THOSE SHOES? Listen, I know you’ve been a model and commercial actress most of your life but, in the real estate world we aren’t on camera and you need to buy jeans and sneakers.”
Offended, I had responded “why would I spend good money on ugly clothing and accessories?!” Years later, I have jeans and sneakers. True story. Could the Amazon order of Natures Miracle solve the stinky problem? I have no idea but, it arrived last night while I was at a rehearsal with clients.
This morning, my husband couldn’t wait to get to Springtown and “give Natures Miracle” a shot at solving the stinky problem. Warily, I predict that nothing is going to fix skunk house. Ugh.
Heading off to the courthouse this morning before meeting clients at Dallas North Tower, Parker County Jail and Tarrant County Jail, my calendar for months is intimidating to say the least.
A day off for the Texas Twins isn’t coming any time soon but, Maryssa and Makenna are looking forward to the Easter break from school.
This weekend will be spent on location with foster children at an Easter Egg Hunt that Cindy and I along with my Texas Twins Events Team are sponsoring. I look forward to meeting our new clients on location soon and wish you a Blessed Weekend full of family, fun and adventure..,
This morning while dashing off to meet my gorgeous brides, my husband told me the “Stinky Skunk Scenario In Springtown” still hadn’t been solved. We’ve tried chlorine. We’ve tried Killz being painted. We’ve tried knocking down walls and replacing them. We’ve removed bathtubs. We’ve done everything at the “Stinky Skunk Development.” Not surprisingly, every idea has failed miserably. My husband’s latest idea is to put 6 ozone machines in the house. To date, the expense involved in trying to remove the smell is so far over 4K. The number continues to grow. Heavy sigh.
Dealing with the stinky development has really upset my husband to no end. In fifty years of developing and building custom homes, my husband has never dealt with anything like this before. Only time will tell if this latest idea will work. A few months ago, our roof caved in. The insurance sent 6 Hepa machines to get the dust out of our home for the repairs to begin. I had assumed Hepa and Ozone to be the same machine. Apparently, they aren’t.
Thanking my lucky stars that we no longer live in each development and subsequently move every two years anymore, I was anxious to make “a run for it from WorthamWorld” in order to miss morning traffic on my way to Tennessee Colony, Texas. A literal “City of Prisons.”
I know, ya all think Huntsville is the only city full of Prisons but, it isn’t. Tennessee Colony isn’t the only “other city of Prisons” either. Gatesville, Texas is “home of the female prison” city. I’m there frequently with male clients marrying females and female clients marrying female clients.
While others were fighting the traffic to get to an office job, I was fighting traffic to get to my first prison.
“Thank God for Toll Roads. I have no idea what I would do without them. Whether it costs me $100 a month to use the express or a thousand, they are worth every penny due to the amount of travel I do across Texas highways.”
Wendy M Wortham
TDCJ Coffield Unit is remarkably close to TDCJ Michael Unit. Convenient right? I thought so too. Close proximity Units are how and why I can “cover several Units in the same day.” Michael and Coffield are even behind the same guard gate meaning there was no need to drive out and re enter either Unit. I was cleared for both upon entry.
My first bride, Blanca, had brought her mother and the grooms mother with her. You will hear me complain about photo quality at certain Units and wonder why? To better show you, I’m adding the photo from Coffield Unit with Blanca.
There’s a reason I do my own photos. The reason is to give my clients an opportunity to celebrate and have clear photos of their wedding day.
Sadly, I can’t take my own photos at Units and also, the inmate can’t leave so, Unit photos are a must have for clients whenever they are available for purchase at $3 each. I always buy at least 2.
Blanca and I waited for a little over an hour to finally meet her fiancée who was hilarious. Seriously. He should be a stand up comedian. I’ve never laughed so hard while conducting a wedding before. Due to the wait to perform the wedding at Coffield and another wait for the photos to be printed, I left Blanca at Coffield to drive right over to Michael Unit and meet Bridget.
Heading out of Coffield, I stopped to update both moms on what Blanca was doing and that I would meet them again after meeting Bridget at Michael Unit.
Arriving at Michael Unit, I checked in with Bridget and ran back to my SUV to grab the handwritten vows the groom had mailed me. Bridget went back to her car for quarters.
The amount of walking I do at Prisons should have me losing weight I often think. However, a sonic corn dog and Diet Coke or other “road trip” snack items prevent me from getting skinny. Heavy sigh.
While back at my SUV, I check in with my husband and Cindy who is busy in Weatherford with the twins, Maryssa and Makenna who were both “less than thrilled” about STAAR Testing today and tomorrow.
The twins hate STAAR Testing but what student doesn’t? Maryssa is not nearly as driven as Makenna when it comes to stellar grades.
In fact, Maryssa (below left) is social. Makenna (below right) has a meltdown if she doesn’t make A’s 100% of the time.
Little Madyson is loving speech therapy so much that she’s now talking in sentences which is a great leap from where she was only a few months ago.
All three of my grandnieces are looking forward to getting ready for more adventure together this summer. Maddy loves Hurricane Harbor and the twins love not waking up at 5:30AM. Stephaney is settling in to her new routine at home again and looking forward to finding work to keep her busy.
Yesterday, I had a call from the Attorney General about Stephaney and how she wound up in Valdosta. I involved not only the DA but also the Sheriff’s Department and Attorney General to get Stephaney home. I’m also committed to preventing this from happening to anyone else. A poster wasn’t going to bring Stephaney home. Law enforcement did.
It’s shocking to me that something like this “Valdosta situation” could happen to our family but, based on emails from readers, not uncommon.
Families lose loved ones to mental illness and addiction everyday. The only difference between our family and the family members contacting me were that eventually families gave up. We didn’t. We threatened to for years. Nearly seventeen years. It’s a very long time to deal with chaos. During that window, my twin sister developed hypertension and high blood pressure. During that nearly seventeen year window, my sister also had a heart attack.
In the same nearly seventeen year window, I developed a lump in my breast that had to be removed and thyroid cancer in the same year. Two years later, precancerous lesions in my ovaries required a full hysterectomy.
If you think dealing with a loved one who “has problems” won’t affect your health, you couldn’t be further from the truth. Ask me, I know. Ask Cindy. Stress can and does kill people. It hasn’t killed us but it’s because we are fighters. We smile to hide our pain. Cindy and I are resilient.Perhaps my twin sister and I were unwilling to give up on Steph? I don’t know but, I do know that trying to “fix Stephaney” has taken nearly 17 years of our life so far and when you invest that much time in something, it’s harder to walk away. Ask me, I know.
For most of my life, I’ve never turned down an opportunity to travel. As a teen, I traveled Texas for Whataburger Commercials with Mel Tillis.
Later, I went into print and commercial modeling. I never said no to an opportunity to see a new place. I loved adventure and being paid to travel made my life far more fun. I don’t mind living out of a suitcase and never have. I relish the adventure!
I was a frequent flyer for the the better part of my life. At 9 years old, my son was also a frequent flyer. We traveled so much that the Admirals Club was as familiar as our own living room.
I believe part of the reason I found a trip to Georgia appealing was that it would give Stephaney a chance to explore and get out of Texas. I didn’t see danger. I’ve never seen danger and I’ve traveled out of the country to Europe and Mexico with only a few hiccups in Mexico mainly due to driving the pink Jeep identifying myself as a tourist.
I don’t drive Las Brisas Jeeps anymore and discourage anyone else from doing so either.
However, having cash on hand to the people pulling us over claiming to be police officers in Acapulco was a great way to get yourself out of a sticky situation.
While Cindy panicked, a couple fifty dollar bills got us back on the road “high tailing it” right back to our luxury resort and taxi cabs. Leave the driving to someone else abroad. It’s safer.
Bridget was beautiful, bubbly and hilarious. I had so much fun with her that it was as if we had known each other all of our lives.
Walking in to the Visitation Area, Bridget told me about how she had know Pip from years and years ago. In fact, they had met in school. Bridget hadn’t seen him in thirty years.
I’m always fascinated by the back story because every client has one. These TDCJ Clients are warriors. How so? Because for one, I’m not sure if I went to Prison my husband would still be around and two, they make daily sacrifices to make their relationship work. Hence the term “warrior.”
Today, I told my Coffield groom “you are lucky. She has been driving for hours and your mom as well as her mom came with her today.” He said “lucky? How so?” I said “you are lucky to have someone who loves you enough to sacrifice for expensive phone calls and long drives. You are lucky because you have someone who is resilient and has perseverance. There are people on the outside that cannot find anyone to commit to and they aren’t even in prison. Count your blessings and thank this woman because she went through a lot to stand before you here today.” Not surprisingly, he did. I’m honest. I’m blunt and I tell it like it is.
Handing Pip his handwritten vows while he looked at his blushing bride, knowing they hadn’t seen each other in thirty years was a fascinating back story for me. I don’t even remember who I went to school with thirty years ago.
I kept the handwritten vows to send to Bridget with her bridal photos as a wedding gift. I’m corny like that. Here are Bridget and Pip happily married at Michael Unit.Leaving Michael Unit with Bridget behind me, I called Blanca and met her at the Tennessee General Store. I had over 300 emails since last night and ignored them all. When I’m with a client, the best way to reach me is text or phone call. Sorry but, get in line.
Blanca and her new mother in law and mother drove across the street to the Tennessee Colony Church for photos. Bridget met us there too.
I had packed my usual array of fun stuff for photos and had a great time with both of my new brides. Bridget waited for me to get several fun shots with Blanca and her family before they headed back home. While going through my items, Makenna (one of the twins) sent a text. “MiMi, I think I really did great on my STAAR Test today.”
I quickly told Bridget “it’s one of the twins, I need to answer her.” Bridget like all of my clients realize that my family and especially my grandnieces or twin sister are a part of my life and waited for me to not only answer Makenna but also take a call from one of my 7 Beto Brides regarding printing her Twogether In Texas Certificate.
Thank you Bridget. You are an angel and I really appreciate your patience. Here’s my favorite photos from your photo shoot today. As soon as I can find time, we are going to go have that drink! Bridget had to get back to The Colony to take her daughter to work or I would’ve loved to grab a quick bite before heading back to Fort Worth. I decided to head to The Colony instead and check it out.
But, time wasn’t on my side with a phone ringing off the hook in my SUV and a husband who still hadn’t solved the skunk infestation at his Springtown development. I’m suggesting baking soda and hydrogen peroxide next. Jeez, I will be relieved when this skunk situation resolves itself.
The Colony is actually near the airport and I’ve been by many times. I recognized The Dallas Market where I had modeled for years for so many different designers that I can’t even recall all of them.
No, I don’t miss “those days.” Twenty to forty pound bags of shoes while pulling 1-4 racks of clothes in one day? I’m good. In fact, I was thrilled to drive by the Dallas Market to such an extent today that I sped up while doing so.
No more being a hangar for me ya all! Those days are gone forever with half naked models being mean to each other and designers screaming “on the track and out of the racks.”
I won’t miss any of the years I spent in dressing rooms and on catwalks. There isn’t any real glamour as you starve yourself to be the perfect sample size and are fighting the headaches your hungry stomach gives you. I did my time and I still own many amazing couture clothes that were never “given to me” as many believe. Nothing is free. I worked in exchange for nice clothing. I also bought and brought my own shoes. There is no free lunch. I used my designer clothing to obtain high end sales positions. You must look the part and I did.
If you ever try to sell anything without having pride in your appearance, you will fail. I didn’t. I prepared. I created an amazing wardrobe by working very hard to get it for many years. No one buying from me ever knew this. They assumed that I was rich because I looked the part. From crocodile boots to fur coats and $2k silk suits, when you walked in to buy anything, you bought it from me. Not the wrinkled shirt wearing half bored salesman beside me. It’s the truth. I couldn’t afford beautiful clothes so I became a model and worked for beautiful clothes instead. Yep, I’m a pioneer.
Driving to The Colony in the event Bridget had time to meet me, I pulled over to Texas Roadhouse for an appetizer and glass of wine and sent a text to Bridget. Moments later, I would realize they don’t open until 4PM during the week? On a busy access road? Surely they must be losing business? I will have to catch up with Bridget soon as she is equally busy too and a celebratory drink just wasn’t in the cards for either of us today.
I’ve had a few questions about “action shots” on location. Leigh Ann loves getting action shots. She’s the only person on my team who is good at it.
The photo of the groom jumping was also taken by Leigh Ann. I cannot do “action photography” very well I’m afraid. Here’s the pic.
“Why do you wear suits to Prisons and Vestments to other events?” Because vestments are “flowy.” I wear suits because wearing a poncho styled garment into a Unit wouldn’t be practical or within the dress code guidelines.
Thr Administrative Directive pertaining to the visitation dress code is specific about attire and especially oversized attire. Why? An open or flowing garment can hide many things that’s why.
My Vestments are imported from Europe. Traditional Clients love choosing from a wide array of my many closets full of Vestments and suits. Last week, my TDCJ Holliday Unit bride was “shook down” due to her dress. Like a Vestment, it was flowy. Really oversized. I knew when she approached me that a shake down was coming and fully expected it.
The Warden advised me of a “shake.” Knowing why a strip search would be warranted, I offered to join my client for a “strip down.”
I’m adding the photos below to show you why I expected a strip search upon meeting my client in Huntsville. I.E. never question a Warden. I don’t and my clients don’t either.
If you are asked to strip- do it it’s not a request. Quite the contrary, it’s a demand required to enter the Unit.
The other “alternative” is to wear a cafeteria smock backwards. Effectively this “walk of shame” is the LAST RESORT for female clients so, I suggest being complacent and going along with the shake instead.
Clothing is solely at the discretion of the Unit. The AD outlines attire but the Unit has the final call on what’s appropriate and what isn’t. Flowing or oversized clothing is prohibited. Generally, all clients send me photos of what they plan to wear. The TDCJ Holliday client (above) didn’t.
“What percentage of your clients are LBGT” Well, off the top of my head and while being confused as to why this question is asked so frequently, the answer is 30-40% and that applies across the board.
What this means is whether a client booked through Texas Twins Events, The Pawning Planners, TDCJ Officiant or even bought from Texas Twins Treasures, a large percentage of all of my clients are LBGT.
“What percentage of your clients are rednecks or hillbillies?” Well, this question wouldn’t even be being asked if a few people hadn’t seen my shotgun/Camo themed attire. Seriously, it wouldn’t.
It’s actually not that unusual for clients to ask me to dress a certain way or “in theme.” I can’t count the number of times someone has asked me to dress as Elvis.
But, the answer is less than 5% of our bookings are Pawning Planners Clients. “Why are all of your clients so different?” Different to whom? Pawning Planners Clients have little or no money so they barter their event services. Texas Twins Events Clients are booking by paying.
Venues I’m on staff at keep a percentage of my fee. Often the percentage is more than 50% but, worth it to me because the venue is a non profit and I believe enough in the non profit to forfeit a large percentage of my fee.
I don’t HAVE to work. I choose to work. I enjoy working. TDCJ Clients are an extension of Texas Twins Events. I rebranded and expanded Texas Twins Events to include TDCJ Weddings.
The answer to these “percentage questions” is that we help ALL people from ALL backgrounds. From rich to poor and everywhere in between, no two clients are alike.
The variety of our client bases raise eyebrows. We don’t care. Our clients don’t care either. Opinions of others will never have an impact on our client bases.
In fact, I turn down at least 15-25 new requests for services each and every month all year long or move them to another date down the road. You can either choose someone else on my staff or find someone else to help you. There is only one of me.
It’s not uncommon for clients to be so determined to book with us that THEY CHANGE THEIR EVENT DATE TO ACCOMMODATE MY SCHEDULE.
I have never advertised and I’ve never needed to. I went into the event business to exceed expectations and based all of our fees on people over profit. I don’t have to work and can therefore “write my own ticket.”
I don’t take every job because I don’t want to and also because the last thing I would ever do is spread myself too thin for my booked clients who are and always will be my first priority. I’m particular. I only work as a planner by referral. Period. Planning takes months of my time. MONTHS that can be spent addressing numerous other clients.
Planning is a time consuming task. It’s not and never will be my first choice. I’ve been a planner for years and I’m excellent at it but, I can do 30-70 weddings in the time I spend “planning one.” Shocking right? It’s true.
Cindy and I work together as twin event planners. Large events need a minimum of both of us. We enjoy working together. In fact, we are happiest when we are together.
Smaller events can get away with one planner but, we often work as a team to ensure that we are over staffed rather than under staffed. “I heard you on the radio and you’re a little salty regarding language now and then.” Hmm, well, I prefer to be real and honest than fake and dishonest. I grew up on Vandenburg AFB. My first word was most likely “salty.”
Many of family members are active or retired military. I don’t apologize for a little “salty” language now and then. I work hard and I’m driven. I also am a very passionate person. Being “salty” gets my point across. No one expects it but, I’m frank. If I’m speaking salty to you, I’m probably annoyed or irritated to begin with or I’m so comfortable with you, I effectively let it all hang out. In general it’s one of the two aforementioned scenarios that my saltiness will “shine through.” Hopefully, it’s because in comfortable around you.
If I use expletives now and then, don’t be offended by my doing so. I tell it like it is and occasionally, my family life isn’t always pretty. I’d rather say something than hold it inside. But, that’s just me.
“Are you a Christian?” Yes. Absolutely. I was raised to praise numerous different religions. I’m a minister and not only believe in God but also in the power of prayer. My husband is also deeply religious. My entire family believe not only in God but more importantly in giving back.
My faith has been tested throughout my lifetime but, my faith has held true through the good and the bad through the difficult and the easy.
I listen to a lot of old Gospel music as well as country, swamp music, classic rock and even classical music. Often, it’s Johnny Cash who will sing a line that perfectly sums up the way I’ve felt at one time or another in my lifetime. Cindy and I saw Johnny perform at a California prison at a very young age and it’s something that I will always remember vividly.
When he walked out on that stage and said “hello, I’m Johnny Cash,” it was the simplest and yet the most powerful statement I had heard anyone make. As a child, I knew every lyric to the songs he sang with a touch of bitterness one minute that easily transformed to love, hope and promise in the next song. My go to music is Johnny Cash more often than not when driving to a Texas Prison.
“If I gave you time to change my mind, I’d try to leave all the past behind. Knowing that you lied straight-faced while I cried. Still I look to find a reason to believe.”
Johnny Cash
Throughout my lifetime, I’ve lost my faith on more than one occasion. My mother was a heroin addict. My grandfather was a child molester. My first husband beat me and my second husband was unfaithful.
The best way out of a difficulty is through it.” – Will Rogers –
At this stage of my life though, I’ve learned that God was never punishing me. Instead, God was preparing me. I would need faith and resilience. I would need strength and wisdom in my life. My hardships would teach me compassion and empathy.
“Listen to the words written down when the man comes around. Whoever is unjust let him be unjust still. Whoever is righteous let him be righteous still. Whoever is filthy let him be filthy still.”
Johnny Cash
I live and work by a very high set of moral standards. My family does too. There are no grey areas with me. It’s cut and dry. Black or white. My clients are the family I wasn’t born with. They are all like my children.
Long after a Clients event service, these former clients also become our friends. Their loyalty is also why I’ve never needed to advertise any of my businesses. Don’t be surprised, we earned our stellar reputation the hard way.
Cindy would say “close the tent- there are far too many clowns in here again.” I don’t. I can’t control the clowns.
I try to control the chaos but at the end of the day, my life is a unique combination of both my family and my business…
The clowns of course are my family. Cindy doesn’t point that out because our readers already realize this…
I’ve been working in film since I was eighteen years old and filmed my first commercial with Mel Tillis in Fort Worth, Texas. Other members of my family AKA Team? Not nearly as long. Certain members of my client bases? Rare if ever.
I worked as a commercial model for twenty plus years. While some might think this job was exciting, the truth is that I was basically a hangar. I was better at selling high end clothing, jewelry and luxury cars than any of my other coworkers AKA models were. How so? I had the unique ability to have been “born to sell.”
While other models might have had a better body, I had a by far better personality. Selling is about relationships not seeing someone frowning at buyers and behaving haughty while walking a runway.
Only twice has my current husband ever seen me “own a room” on the catwalk. The first time he was amazed at how I managed to notice every buyer in the room. I pay attention to details. Walking off the stage, I also walked the buyers tables and gave them an opportunity to touch the fabric or my opinion on why this fur or that evening gown would be a good investment as a timeless treasure to “the right buyer.” I have always learned every aspect of any product that I have ever sold. I still do. It’s essential to be knowledgeable.
If I believed in a product, I could sell it all day long. If I didn’t believe in the product, I refused to attempt to sell it. I have never been desperate enough to sell a product I wouldn’t buy myself either. I’ve never had to be. Why? Because I’m a helluva salesperson that’s why.
I don’t see clients as numbers. I see clients as relationships. Friendships with my clients have lasted for years after a sale. My clients are like family to me.
In today’s world, trying to find anyone in a store that even knows their own inventory is an escapade in futility. A few weeks ago, I went to Academy searching for camo clothing. Three salespeople told me “we don’t have anything because the season is over.” I continued to search and found an entire aisle of camouflage pants, shirts, jackets and accessories. Did I buy? No. But the reason was fit. The pants were cut for a man and I’m an hourglass shape. Why buy something and pay to have it altered? Instead, I went to my tailor and had an outfit made. Manufacturers need to realize that most women are not built straight up and down because we aren’t.
As a retailer though, it’s essential your staff knows your product. Sadly, this “I don’t know what’s going on” type of scenario has been happening for years within the retail industry due to a consistent high turnover or inadequate pay or even both.
Go out to a store on your lunch break and try to buy something while asking questions regarding the product and see how it works out for you. No one on the salesfloor has a clue anymore. It’s no wonder why people shop online because at the very least they can find what they are looking for. Think about it.
In 2004, I was the top Cadillac salesperson over and over for years until I decided to hang up luxury car sales. How did I do this? By educating myself about the product and then bringing clients to me. Not the dealership but specifically my office.
I was willing to think outside the box and did. While other salesmen were reading newspapers or outside smoking or taking personal phone calls, I hired a photographer, bought evening gowns in various colors and ran my own print ads in country clubs.
Making money takes money. I was investing in myself and knew I could make a profitable return on my investment.
I was effectively direct marketing consumers who could afford to spend $110k on a Cadillac XLR. That’s right. I studied advertising and marketing and knew that “bringing just anyone” into the dealership wouldn’t sell high end cars. Why? The majority of consumers don’t spend $50k-100k on a vehicle.
Bringing the “right person” in to the dealership would sell high end cars and, I was right regarding an “idea” that the other salesman found hilarious. I let them laugh. I’m a businesswoman and smarter than the “peanut gallery.” There’s a reason they have the “cheap seats.”
I am a pioneer. I don’t “fit in any box” and I never will. I laughed all the way to the bank while other salesmen laughed at me. They weren’t laughing long. People often laugh at my ideas or concepts until they realize how thinking outside of the box works. Then, they want my expertise. Then, they want me to train them. But, I don’t work for free. Knowledge is power. Experience is priceless and without risk there are no rewards.
The number of times someone has contacted me to ask me to “teach them how to do what I did” would astound you. From venue owners to salespeople “who heard about the lady that was a model and created her own print ads” to others who recognized that my success was based entirely on being different. As a child, being different was never “a gift.” As an adult though, my resilience and strength were my formula for success.
Others have contacted me for years because they “want to learn how to do what I do.” It is surprising. But, the people “asking for an apple and expecting a pie” cannot understand why and how I make anything I involve myself with successful. It’s actually the “key” to my success.
I am fearless. I’m not afraid. I’ve never been afraid to fail first to succeed second. Ever. I can afford to take risks. When you learn anything the hard way by doing it yourself, you remember every detail.
Sure, I’ve taken a fall now and then on a bad investment but who hasn’t? I get right back on my horse and ride on. Fear is failure.
The stock market literally bores me to death. Put me in a casino with lights, music and excitement. I’d rather gamble than watch the stocks. My husband does the long term investments.
#cindyism “FAILURES are the SEEDS you SOW, before REAPING a HARVEST of SUCCESS” God bless us all.
I have a photographic memory. I’m also dyslexic. I taught myself to read and escaped by reading. I’m different. People who want to do what I do aren’t. They cannot be me because they have never endured the struggles I’ve overcome.
My sister and I weren’t afraid to leave home at 15 with the clothes on our backs. We weren’t worried about where we would go, where we would sleep or how we would survive. At 15 we were also eating out of trash cans behind convenience stores. Now you can comprehend and fully understand why I’m not afraid to be different. Cindy isn’t either. We had nothing and I mean nothing to go back to. No one to help us. No one who cared about us. Our family? Humph. They didn’t care if we starved. We ran from the Hell we left behind. RAN. Cindy and I don’t owe anyone anything. We are survivors.
We both jumped into our first marriages and we both regretted our decision. If someone were to try and hit either of us today, I can assure you that it would be a mistake. We left a violent home as teens and assumed every wife was beaten because we didn’t know anything else. Violence was a normal fact of life for us as children. But, we learned as adults that “our normal” was in fact “abnormal.” So, we left again.
Years ago, other models could not for the life of them understand how I outsold over and over at every single show thought they should sell more solely because “they were thinner.” Being thin doesn’t make you an incredible salesperson whether you are in print or at a style show. It wasn’t unusual in those days for a buyer to purchase whatever I had worn strutting down that catwalk right off my rack. In fact, it was a frequent occurrence. Everyone wanted to be me at a style show. I was the most confident and carefree model I’ve ever met.
Often I was also wearing heavier makeup to mask a bruised eye or swollen cheek from my jealous husband the day before. No one knew this other than my dresser. I wore Christian Dior butterfly sunglasses daily to hide most of my face walking into make up.
When I wore something while modeling, I owned it. I made it more than soft, luxurious fur or a piece of expensive fabric or high end jewelry. The moment my dresser said “go,” I was transformed from all of the problems waiting for me at home (I had a violent first marriage) and because of my inate ability to compartmentalize, when I was on a runway or in front of a camera, I was in also in another world.
Modeling was a world where no one would hit me or call me names. In a world where I was the star of the show while others assumed that they were. I was a chameleon who shed my beaten down victim shell the moment I walked my rack with my dresser. The second I knew each and every change on my rack or racks, I had already decided what liked best about this or least about that. Buyers would ask and I would answer. I knew the fabrics and I knew the products.
I became an actress rather than a hangar and I walked through those backroom drapes and half dressed models to a room full of buyers as if they had been waiting for me all of their lives. I was “on.” The other models never stood a chance with me. It took time for them to realize this but, they did.
I’m a paid consultant and whether I advise you for ten minutes or twenty, my bill rate is by the hour. That’s right I get paid to talk and the buyer listens. I’ve marketed and represented Kodak, P&G, and many other other household name based brands that are highly recognized. If you want my advice or insight or direction on how to sell something you call me. But, you also pay me.
Cindy is a pioneer too. We both had to be our entire lives. Years ago, Cindy was working at Hawk Electronics. She had broken her back in a horrific car accident and couldn’t walk a salesfloor so she took a job scheduling home security alarm appointments. Like me, she was an innovator. Cold calling sucks and to get $25 per sale, Cindy read newspapers and got crime reports to directly find areas of high crime and called them instead of wasting her time and her breath calling the “wrong people.” Cindy had a 99% closing rate but, the “old dogs” aka salesmen she handed the leads to cut her out of the sale and collected $150 for “finding the lead.” Within weeks, Cindy noticed her commissions were going down and went to payroll to question why. When she was told the names of confirmed sales and recognized them as her own leads, she “whipped out her own records.” Because the old dogs “had already been paid on Cindy’s sales,” my sister learned a valuable lesson.
A few days later, one of the salesmen walked up to her desk and said “have you got got any leads for me?” Smirking Cindy said “no but, I do have a news flash. I’m working with payroll and from now on, I’m giving payroll a list of all of my leads names and phone numbers and addresses as well as the date I contacted them. You won’t be stealing from me anymore.” Two days later, the unethical scoundrel quit. My sister though continued to CYA and got paid to do so.
There aren’t any “friends as coworkers” in the sales industry. Sales are a cut throat business. While other coworkers attempted to copy, replicate or duplicate our ability to outsell them, Cindy and I laughed all the way to the bank.
Originality and creative thinking as well as our ability to think outside the box are only a few of the reasons we have always been successful in ANY sales based industry. If we failed, we went hungry and we both knew it.
My experience in film and print modeling propelled me into the strongest selling high end luxury car bracket there was. I also left Cadillac “on top.”
Looking back, those “old dogs” on the salesfloor needed a wake up call. I literally gave them one by bringing my own people into the dealership rather than waiting for the people to come to the dealership and hoping to “snag” a possible client in a position to buy who was actually only “pulling up to window shop” and effectively wasting my time or my “up.”
My ads weren’t for the dealership. They were for me and if you saw my ad, you ONLY came to ME. I worked solely by appointment. Yes, I was THAT busy.
By the way, prior to Cadillac, I had never sold cars in my entire life either. I can look at a business any type of sales driven business and find a niche.
I’ve been a brand ambassador for so many brands that I’m also an expert consultant for GLG and have been for many years. What people don’t know about me shocks them. But, I’m a survivor. I saw a need for affordable event services and created a People Over Profit based event business. No one else was willing to take such a risk but, I could well afford to and I did. Maybe to a few that was a crazy idea but, while they laughed, my business model became stronger and stronger year after year. I laugh now as I have many times before. I laugh because I’m driven, I’m passionate and I’m determined. I don’t give up. I’m also a twin. Yes, together we actually are unstoppable.
The continued interest in my client base or even my life garners phone calls, emails and site inquiries week after week after week. The problem? Trying to educate someone who knows very little about me. It’s a really time consuming task. While talking on the phone to them, I almost always have a client attempting to reach me. In other cases, I am on location with a client when one of these inquiries “roll in.”
I’m the type of person who researches everything. I’m OCD. I’m articulate and I always have a back up plan for disasters in location too. I think in a circle. Literally.
Today’s blog will go over the most unusual and invasive questions I’ve come across yet. A few of them may surprise you. Others may offend you but, I can assure you that I have no problem being honest, transparent and completely open about my life, my clients and my businesses. I have nothing to hide and neither do they.
Leaving my office after going through yet another round of inquiries from production companies and Europe based networks, I am going to literally “kick off” today’s blog with enlightening news you can use if you are not BOUND TO ME BY BLOOD OR BUSINESS.
Listen up and pay attention as I rarely if ever repeat myself. I would repeat myself but I simply don’t have the time during wedding season. I’m far more inclined to be patient when I don’t have a burdened schedule to be honest with you.
Contacting me and assuming that you are going to schedule a Skype interview or conference call at YOUR CONVENIENCE is one of the craziest ideas that I’ve ever heard of yet. You’re busy? You are asking me to drop everything to accommodate your schedule? If I have time for YOU outside my own schedule, such Skype or even phone interviews will be scheduled AT MY CONVENIENCE NOT YOUR OWN.
Furthermore, asking me to “Face Time” you from the road while traveling or while I’m on location, isn’t going to happen today, tomorrow or forever. The ONLY time I use Face Time is with my grandnieces.
Frankly, no one (unless you are in your 20’s) looks good on Face Time. I have no desire for anyone to use film from Face Time to either “pitch or promote” me.
I’m hoping that I’ve clarified the best way to get what YOU want from ME, I will also take a moment to once again ask that anyone attempting to contact me STOP contacting venues I’m on staff at and instead use one of my sites, my email or the same phone number I’ve had for fifteen years to contact me rather than continuing to call me at a business I do not work at on a daily basis.
I.E. the number you are calling isn’t to CONTACT me instead, the number listed on the internet is to BOOK ME. The venue is busy too. After all, it’s wedding season.
This “calling me at a venue I’m on staff at” continues to happen and also is continually disruptive to the business you are contacting. Please stop.
I have five websites with contact us links and my phone number as well as my address are literally “all over the internet.”
Now, let’s get down to today’s parking lot blog and reiterate that all of my blogs are typed with one finger on an iPhone in a parking lot waiting on a client. For those who assume I pay a writer, you couldn’t be further from the truth. I do not hire creative content writers. I create my own content. Also, I have no interest in blogging for someone else because “you need an experienced blogger.”
Please do not use any of my sites to contact me to either pitch a product or for any reason other than Event Services through Texas Twins Events, The Pawning Planners or TDCJ Weddings in Texas and outside Texas.
I don’t need “more clients” or “marketing” or “engaged social media.” I have all of those things and handle my own social media.
I’m an overachiever and a workaholic that hasn’t needed to work to earn a living in years. I’m also not “relatable” to most people due to the fact that while others were working as little as possible in their twenties, I was working 2-3 jobs.
Most people don’t put 120-150% into their career. Why? Because they are lazy and entitled. Also, they have a family to fall back ON nearly all of the time too. I didn’t. My sister didn’t. We are DIFFERENT but, the difference between our stellar work ethics and others is based entirely on our unique circumstances and ability to survive and thrive. We thrill our clients. We treat them like the family we weren’t born with. Our clients are and always will be our first priority. Personlized service is difficult to come by these days but, when you book with the Texas Twins, you are the star of our show.
If you have hired my sister or I in any capacity over the years, you were always surprised at our stellar work ethics. Cindy and I were thrilled to “become the employee you wished you had ten more of.” We were also honored and ecstatic to exceed your expectations because you also paid us to “perform.” This type of dedication is rare.
However, for my former employers that cut our commissions “because we were making too much money,” we also left you and worked elsewhere. Loyalty is earned. I’m always amazed that expecting someone to sell your products without offering them and incentive or adequate compensation continues to “confuse business owners as to why their numbers are down” but, if you have a helluva salesperson, be smart enough to keep them by compensating them rather than punishing them and effectively “cutting their income.” It’s common sense.
“Pigs get fed and hogs get slaughtered.” Cutting your sales staffs commissions is the stupidest and greediest thing I’ve ever encountered. It’s happened to me many times though by managers who were upset that I earned “more than them.”
If I quit to take another job, you forced me to do so by affecting my earning capacity. I don’t look back. I look forward.
Work is my salvation. I’m happiest when working. My twin sister is too.
The Texas Twins Events “umbrella” for Prison Weddings and/or other states outside of Texas inmate Officiant services also fall under Texas because I am based in Texas. I’ve been asked “why don’t you have different sites pertaining to different states you operate within?” The last thing I need is to add more sites for each state I operate within. I already write blogs for five sites and juggle numerous clients and have no need to redirect traffic to another site. I also work solely by referral and always have so there is no need for me to create a new site for a different state we service. In fact, destination event services have been booked through Texas Twins Events for YEARS.
If you are contacting me or having your freight company contact me regarding a purchase or pick up for Texas Twins Treasures, please do not use TDCJ Officiant to do so. This particular site has nothing to do with Texas Twins Treasures. Items sold at Texas Twins Treasures are scheduled for pick up or delivery through my site or via direct email or phone. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Let’s get started on why anyone in the entertainment industry assumes that a bride or groom planning to marry an inmate is either a hillbilly or biker and in either description also uneducated. This “preposterous idea” of anyone marrying an inmate leaving the trailer park to do it is not only offensive to my clients but also myself and my staff.
My clients know the decision they are entering to marry an inmate is serious. They realize that it will be one sided and they are willing to accept those terms. In nearly all cases, many of my clients never actually “planned to marry a Prisoner.”
Because of the continued ignorance of others, I’ve decided to use my production site, Texas Twins TV to specifically share the stories of clients who have an interest in even considering auditioning for any type of television format pertaining to their lives, their journeys and their decision to marry an inmate. For a link to Amanda and her journey, click here- Wendy Wortham Interviews TDCJ Client, Amanda.
These individuals are educated, wholesome and passionate. They are also brave, strong and resilient. If you are unaware of this and assume that our California Prison Clients are “beach bums” or that our Texas, Louisiana and other adjoining states Prison Client Bases are hillbillies or swamp people, save your ignorance and spare my time. You are incorrect on all “assumptions.”
I had one production company ask me last month “can they talk though? Do they speak intelligently?” What? Are you kidding me? Turn off that television and recognize that they have obviously spoken to me and therefore can and do hold intelligent and articulate conversations on a daily basis. Can they talk? WOW.
I could not believe yet another idiotic statement last week that ironically came (as usual) at the worst possible time for me while on location with a bride having a meltdown at a high end venue from yet another production company “we saw you with shotguns and wearing camo in Texas on the internet. What do you mean you aren’t a hillbilly? You looked like one.”
Let’s add the photos shall we? I’m the most versatile person you are ever going to encounter. I can go from a barn to an exclusive venue within hours and I do. First- the camo client had hired my staff specifically for a themed wedding. Do your research. Second- Dream Events are just that. The client wanted to incorporate her daughter into the wedding as the groom had been acting as her father since birth. This was a very emotional ceremony for all concerned.
The bride had asked me to wear camo and like anyone else asking me to do something outside my usual scope of services, was a referral. I had never previously owned anything camo in my entire life. So, no, I’m not a hillbilly. I don’t live on a farm and I don’t ride a horse to work either.
I thinks it’s interesting that people jump to conclusions without doing more research but, they do. What is this “I’m a hillbilly” or my clients are “hillbillies” synopsis coming from? Could it be based solely on living in Texas? I’m confused.
Here are other photos of more “traditional clients” solely to enlighten you. Yes, they are “regular” clients not to say that any of my clients are “irregular” I am actually quoting yet another production company. “But, Wendy do you have any regular people? You know that aren’t LBGT or marrying an inmate or so poor that they have to barter? You know like regular people?” Obviously, that production company employee was either 21-27 or had miserable grades in English and Literary Composition.
Usually, a production company has someone so young asking the questions that I almost feel sorry for them. Almost. Why? Because they live in a bubble and obviously need to get out more that’s why. Maybe if these “youngsters” would put down their computer or phone and meet real people in real life rather than trolling Instagram, they might realize that being different isn’t weird or antisocial? Just a thought.
Maturity in your 20’s is obviously not easy to obtain when your world is on social media rather than out in the “real world.”
Anyway, we do destination events on a regular basis. These are scheduled on weekends and evenings of course because during the week I’m at a jail or prison. I don’t find this nearly as “unique” as production companies do. Why? Because I’m meeting clients I’m simply meeting them at a different location. I book high end end events too. Surprised? Don’t be. I’m not cheap either. If you want to book me or get on my books, you get in line. I’ve had clients reschedule THEIR EVENT to ACCOMMODATE MY CALENDAR. It’s a fact.
If you want honor, integrity, and a team committed to making your Dream Event a reality regardless of your income because we also barter, then you come to us. We don’t advertise. We never have. We have also never needed to. If I’m cocky- bet your butt I earned the privilege. No one GAVE me a successful business plan. In fact, I created it myself. My family joined me. I wasn’t trying to be like everyone else because obviously that market was entirely saturated.
When I’m asked about my affiliation with the LBGT Community, it isn’t because I’m LBGT. But, one production company assumed my entire family was? “I saw you and your family at a gay parade on the internet. Does homosexuality run in your family?” Hmm. Again, WOW. Common sense is like breath spray. Most folks don’t realize they actually need it. By the way I did answer “no” before waiting with baited breath on the next question while my twin covered her shocked face. PS- it’s LBGT not gay. That word is offensive to the community as a whole.
Let’s go over this stupid assumption in a question format regarding my sexual orientation one more time. Production Company– “are you a lesbian? I saw you on CW33 at a LBGT event.” And you assumed everyone there was LBGT why? What about mothers, siblings, friends? Do you believe that every LBGT event is solely for LBGT people? Hmm.
The photo below was taken by Adam Bouska immediately prior to being cut off attempting to visit friends I recognized at the event by a CW33 NewsFix team and subsequently, they barn stormed my family and I with a camera and microphone stuck right into my face while my grandnieces and sister were being pushed out of the way by CW33 NewsFix at the same time.
If you HAVE NOT seen the CW33 interview, you missed seeing how terrified my grandnieces were. Don’t look at me. Look to the right at them. Maryssa and Makenna were both shell shocked while Cindy angrily looked on. To enlighten you, in adding the link– Wendy Wortham CW33 NewsFix Interview NOH8 Dallas, Texas.
The safety of having Cindy and I beside the twins is most likely is why the twins both didn’t start crying or screaming when that herd of reporters came running at me and effectively, pushing at the twins and Cindy at the same time.
Children who are unfamiliar with reporters are always “uncomfortable.” I can say this though, every production company that we have ever and I mean ever signed with was kind and friendly to our children and grandchildren. It’s very important to me and my twin that film crews understand we have family that includes younger children and even pets that are an intricate fiber of our lives and business. God bless the production companies for realizing we are a family and often with our grandchildren since reporters obviously don’t for one second consider that I have children with me when charging into the scene.
Our children and grandchildren are no longer intimidated or uncertain with barn storming reporters, cameras or microphones. Why? Because they have spent a large amount of time with over 9 production companies and also have been on location for numerous other film projects. The twins are seasoned and no longer concerned about cameras or microphones although someone charging at them might rattle them, it will not intimidate them anymore.
The difference between the CW33 NewsFix Interview for my grand twins then and today is experience. The twins and my entire family are now (years later) not only familiar with cameras in our faces and microphones in our bras but also more than “used to the process” of filming. It’s just another day for us.
Reporters this is for you- children are not accustomed to barn storming. If you would like to interview me or my sister, for God’s sake do not corner us when we have our granddaughters with us on location.
My youngest grandniece, Madyson is 3 and like the twins years ago, completely and wholly unfamiliar with reporters, microphones or the type of barn storming the twins encountered on the CW33 interview. Did they think I planned to run to the nearest exit for a quick getaway? Who knows. I don’t run with children in tow. No one does.
A few years later at the same NOH8 Campaign, the twins were not nearly as nervous when KTVT approached us at the event. Why? Because by then they had filmed a television pilot and numerous other film productions. I.E. the twins were now “familiar” with cameras in their faces. See photo below…
I’m not a lesbian but I have thousands of friends who are. The “other woman” was my twin sister. Ironic that everyone assuming that we were partners failed to realize we were twins isn’t it?
For years now, I have sponsored the Tarrant County Gay Pride Week Association Parade. You should know that the parade for YEARS was held in the red light districts of LBGT clubs. To make the parade a “family friendly” event where children felt welcome, a group was established, Fairness Fort Worth to fight politicians and get families the opportunity to bring their children. My accountant, Tom Anable started Fairness Fort Worth. Sadly, Tom took his own life after the Raid At The Rainbow Lounge. I miss him. I will always miss him.
“I’ve never met anyone like you and find your use of foul language to be something I didn’t expect.” F Off. I don’t need your approval. My clients don’t need your approval and I don’t give a shit about what might offend you. After all, you contacted me remember? I grew up with a heroin addict for a mother and bumped around with my siblings for years. If you want “fluffy,” find it somewhere else. I’m not fluffy because I’m real.
“What does “bound to you by blood or business” mean?” It means that unless you are part of the primary concerns in my life, you are a fly in my soup. Don’t attempt to “guide” me during an interview into making me something I’m not. You can’t pay me enough to be fake or phony or worse, your version of what you expected.
“How do you manage to keep one client base of yours from being offended by the other?” Offended? Hmm. By what I wonder? That I’m in a Prison one day and in location with affluent people the next? They aren’t going to be at the same event together are they? Well then, why would it matter?
Unlike “other people” who aren’t my clients, the majority of my clients do not and have not ever compared or judged each other or their differences. Except once in all of these years. That’s right. Once.
In one (that’s right ONE) instance, I had a TDCJ Client effectively fire me due to my affiliation with the LBGT Community. Because of this and the apparent confusion since I’m a well published and public supporter of LBGT families, I refunded the former client and updated each and every Wendy Wortham site to address ANYONE trolling that I not only perform LBGT ceremonies but ALSO PRISON WEDDINGS. If my occupation or client bases offend anyone, it’s NOT MY LUGGAGE NOT MY TRIP. Get over yourself.
I hope this blog not only educates but more importantly enlightens everyone who spends 2-5 minutes googling me without spending the time to do more research.
As for this weeks brides and grooms, congrats kids! We made it. It wasn’t easy but it’s now time to celebrate. I look forward to seeing you at Units and sharing your joy.
To all of my Texas Twins Events & Pawning Planners Clients following TDCJ Weddings, I will see ya all in the coming weeks at backyards, venues, and PS, my team and I are excited to once again be back on the tarmac at Carswell AFB on a C-130 officiating another unique and creative wedding ceremony. If you missed the video of our C-130 Wedding on our last visit to Carswell AFB, click here- Wendy Wortham Carswell AFB On Location With Texas Twins Events.
God Bless America and although my staff and our amazing clients may not be what you either assumed or expected, I can assure you that we are all GOING TO SHINE ON regardless of what you think or assume…
Nearly everyday I hear from someone interested in a Prison or Jail Wedding. The number of inquiries would surprise you but, there are many people in love with an inmate and although the majority of my Client base for Texas Prison Weddings is compromised of females, there are also males marrying female inmates.
Yesterday, Our House Media sent an email asking about families living together awaiting the release of an inmate.
After reading the flyer, I agreed to share it on my FB Page– Texas Prison Weddings With Wendy Wortham. I also asked OHM “if LBGT Couples were invited to apply since a large portion of my TDCJ clients happen to be LBGT.” OHM answered that “all families are invited to apply.”
I’m familiar with OHM because they worked on a sizzle reel three years ago about my family owned and operated event businesses, Texas Twins Events and The Pawning Planners as well as documenting how our Texas Twins Treasures storefront effectively “flips” trades bartered through The Pawning Planners.
The barter option continues to surprise people but finding ways for ANYONE to afford services was the reason that I decided to create The Pawning Planners by merging Texas Twins Events and Texas Twins Treasures together.
Families who couldn’t “write a check,” scheduled an Appraisal Appointment and invited my twin sister and I into their homes to “find something of value instead.” Cindy and I love digging through trash to find treasure. Especially when our hunt is to help a family.
Three years ago, prison Weddings weren’t “part of our event service options.” Regardless though, OHM did a great job trying to tie together a package aka my family into a 3 minute video also known as a “sizzle reel.”
I became a TDCJ Officiant shortly after Our House Media created a sizzle reel outlining how four generations of my family work together to make Dream Events a reality.
My twin sister is my partner and my son and his wife work together as an Officiant/Photography team while my niece, Leigh Ann works as an Officiant or Photographer at event bookings.
My twin grandnieces worked as flower girls and ring bearers for years for “tips or flips” but now work as princess characters at birthday parties.
Evolving, expanding and rebranding was essential to our growth and also how a creative request three years ago for “an Officiant at Sanders Estes Unit” would bring a new change and direction to our already wide array of options at Texas Twins Events and The Pawning Planners.
Misty was having difficulty finding anyone willing to Officiate her wedding. The problem? First, it was at a Prison and secondly, it was an interracial marriage. It’s sad to me that anyone would “judge” or “screen” but the truth is that there are a number of Officiants and even photographers who regularly turn away prospects solely because “they are different.”
My family and I have always welcomed anyone and while Misty’s situation was unique, I was willing to undergo the process to become a TDCJ Approved Officiant.
Did I know that my business was about to boom with Prison Weddings? No. Who would? I had no idea that there were so many consumers seeking inmate weddings. But, my weekdays are now spent at Texas Prisons and County Jails.
Before inmate weddings, my weekdays were spent evaluating trades or delivering Texas Twins Treasures sold items when not meeting new clients.
Three years ago, all of our bookings were either on weekends or in the evening. Today, my entire team work seven days a week due to the new bookings at Texas Prisons and County Jails.
My son, daughter in law and niece traditionally handle county jail weddings while I address all Texas Prison bookings. Cindy and I travel across Texas on a daily basis to Texas Prisons as a Twin Team.
While I’m inside a prison, Cindy shops for bargains at area thrift and junk stores for new Texas Twins Treasures items.
After the ceremony is over at the prison, my Client and I meet back up with my sister for impromptu photo shoots that all of our TDCJ Clients enjoy. Photo shoots are fun and bring the celebration to wedding day.
Cindy and I pack a number of bouquets and props as well as clothing changes to keep our shoots fun and full of variety. Over the years, my twin sister, Cindy and I have filmed several sizzle reels with production companies. But, finding a production company that can “successfully” tie my unique blend of businesses into a box hasn’t been easy.
Obviously my “wide array of services” doesn’t fit in a box. I’ve been told that “prison weddings” are controversial but, real life isn’t controversial and love isn’t either.
My TDCJ clients are all educated and fully accept the challenges that loving an inmate brings to their lives. It’s not an easy path. Loving an inmate is expensive for the person or family “on the outside.” The phone calls and long drives to visit are tough on families.
Last week, I was once again at Sanders Estes Unit. This time for a wedding ceremony on Valentines Day which was unusual since wedding ceremonies normally take place on Friday’s twice a month.
The wardens secretary told me she had asked if the wedding could take place on Valentines Day because “it would be more romantic.” My Sanders Estes Client had arrived with the Grooms parents and was thrilled about the Warden allowing the mother and father to join us in the visitation area for the ceremony. The Warden at Estes literally made this families day after a long drive from Austin, Texas to Estes in Venus.
There ARE FAMILIES awaiting the release of inmates. There ARE FAMILIES who live together while waiting for the release of an inmate. OHM has a great idea to document the visits, the phone calls and even, the lengthy process of waiting. The waiting is the hardest part.
Prison Marriage or even Prison Love might be “controversial” to people who cannot understand the concept but, controversial or not, Prison Visitation Areas are becoming wedding chapels two days a month in Texas and other states.
Inmate marriages are on the rise and as families and loved ones await the next visit, the next phone call and finally on the day of release, there are also happy endings…
Valentines Day is one of my busiest days of the year. From Vow Renewals of previous clients to new bookings, juggling new requests required putting my entire team to work.
Meeting my niece, Leigh Ann and her daughter, Madyson at Blue Bonnet Bakery to pick up the cake for our 3PM wedding, Cindy and I were “buckling up” for a bumpy day as the Texas Twins “hit the road.”
As usual, Maddy jumped into my SUV to play with the balloons I had bought for my brides photo shoots today. Leigh Ann and Maddy had a full day of events that ended with picking up my twin grandnieces, Maryssa and Makenna from school and a “dinner date” following while Cindy and I were road tripping.
Of course, Maddy enjoyed her favorite cookies from Blue Bonnet for a treat after her speech therapy early this morning. Maddy’s hearing issues went unnoticed until a year ago.
After surgery for tubes in her ears, Maddy has picked up speaking but at a slower rate than other toddlers. Because of this, speech therapy is helping to bring her up to speed. It’s great that Leigh Ann and Maddy both enjoy the sessions because Maddy can be a handful now and then.
I had purchased a grouping of Valentines balloons not realizing that one of them was a Minions “I’m with stupid” balloon. Although the s and t had been crossed out, I’m glad that I noticed this and cut the possibly offensive balloon from the bunch.
Saying goodbye to Leigh Ann and Madyson, Cindy and I checked in with my son and his wife on their schedules officiating at county jails and two venues today. Everyone was running on schedule so Cindy and I hit the highway to head forty minutes away to Venus.
I frequently check in with my son or niece when the team is split in numerous directions. If I’m unavailable, they call Cindy for advice or insight. Cindy and I have been handling events together for nine years now so it’s hard to surprise us with something unexpected but, it happens.
Arriving in Venus, Texas, I dropped my saucy twin sister at McDonald’s and headed ten miles away to Estes Unit.
My bride looked beautiful and the Grooms parents were excited and thrilled to be able to join us in the visitation area for the ceremony.
The ceremony was short but sweet and I was surprised to learn that Estes doesn’t sell photos for $3 each anymore. Instead, they mail photos as a courtesy which is a nice surprise but, my bride was a little disappointed to be leaving without wedding photos. Hopefully, they are emailed by next week.
Leaving Estes Unit, my bride and her new parent in laws followed me to pick up Cindy and scout a few locations for photos.
I found two hotels nearby and decided to make use of their lobbies while fielding calls for new bookings at Coffield, Beto, Garza East, Ferguson and Allred.
My phone never stops ringing. I handed it to Cindy to field my calls and emails while searching through my traveling photo booth for fun props. Trying to find a beautiful backdrop in Alvarado, I showed my bride how to jump by example. I’m not great at jumping but, occasionally I try to show Clients unique ways to incorporate fun into their photo shoots.
Cindy and I weren’t “thrilled” with the field as a backdrop and decided that the hotel lobby for Holiday Inn Express and Days Inn would work better and, they did.
It’s not easy finding great locations near Prisons for photos. Often, I use Google to check out locations ahead of time.
I found several bouquets and props and even decided to make use of the elevator. By 2:00PM, I had a variety of shots with not only the bride but also the Grooms parents. They loved that I had packed tiaras, bouteniers, bouquets and other fun props. It was nearly time for me to pack everything up and head back to Fort Worth. My timeline was pretty tight today.
Celebrating wedding day after leaving a Prison can be a less than “celebratory” occasion. I change that by offering complimentary photography and an opportunity to “feel like a bride or groom.” My clients love photo shoots with me. Many tell me it was their favorite part of wedding day.
Heading back to Fort Worth to Bell Tower Chapel, Willow Lake Event Center and Mercado Event Center for an evening of weddings, Cindy and I decided to hit a Starbucks and saw a man selling Bonsai trees nearby. I bought one for my husband hoping he would enjoy it as a Valentines gift.
Multitasking our way back from Venus, Cindy called to check on Leigh Ann and all three of her granddaughters while I called back prospects and checked in with my husband and son. Our cell phones ringing all the way, Cindy and I had a great day and are looking forward to taking Friday off before gearing up for a busy weekend of Texas Twins Events bookings. It’s rare to have a day off but, when we do, it’s time to recharge our batteries and gear up for more adventures….
While headed to San Antonio for an event this weekend, I was surprised to see a post about my bride, Mary Martin who was a juror that decided to marry Lester who was sentenced to life in prison.
Of course, I had concerns about Mary and Lester agreeing to an interview about their plans to marry because I warily realized that not everyone could or would understand their fairly unique love story and, I was right.
Public comments broke my heart as I hoped that Mary paid no attention to them. Mary is a sweetheart and although her love story isn’t for everyone, it’s her love story and by being interviewed, it’s now a story that everyone is talking about.
Marrying someone serving a life sentence with no chance for parole is a tough choice. It’s a choice that leaves the “person on the outside” making a lot of sacrifices. What are they? Long drives to the Unit, expensive phone calls and putting money on an inmates books for commissary. Loving an inmate is expensive.
As a TDCJ Approved Officiant, I’ve seen my fair share of surprising unions. From former guards marrying inmates to attorneys marrying their previous client, it’s tough to surprise me anymore. Love knows no bounds.
Dropping my niece, twin sister and all three of my grandnieces at Fiesta Texas, I headed over to the River Walk to meet my clients for the rehearsal dinner with “Mary on my mind.” I had emailed her back and forth yesterday about dates for her upcoming wedding and her paperwork that hadn’t made it to the Chaplain’s office just yet. I60’s Request For Marriage Forms require up to 6 signatures at Prison Units. It’s a time consuming process for my clients.
I decided to order myself a drink while waiting on my clients and worrying about Mary and hoping the negative comments aren’t getting to her.
I love the river walk in San Antonio. From the mariachi bands to the riverboats, it’s another world from Fort Worth.
Since I’m asked “what percentage of our client bases are traditional?” The answer has changed over the years. In the beginning, a large percentage of our clients were LBGT. After merging Texas Twins Events and Texas Twins Treasures to create the barter option with The Pawning Planners, the number of Pawning Planners bookings in comparison to Texas Twins Events or Texas Prison Weddings is remarkably small. But, addressing every economic class has been essential to our growth and success. I’ve never been afraid to take a chance on an idea and neither has my twin sister, Cindy. Did we expect that Prison or Jail Weddings would take over my calendar Monday through Friday year round? No. Who would? But, my bookings went from evening and weekends or seasonal to year round because I was willing to rebrand and expand not only once for The Pawning Planners but twice to expand Texas Twins Events to include Texas Prison Weddings.
Everyone asks about LBGT Prison Weddings. The answer is yes, I also Officiate LBGT Prison Weddings. My businesses are diverse to say the least and we continue to have a strong presence in the LBGT Community. Did I expect a “boom” to our business from being open minded? No. But, my goal has always been to treat every client like family. To celebrate their differences and successes and treat them as the individuals they are.
I’ve had several new bookings already this month and I’m at Bell Tower Chapel as well as Willow Lake Event Center and the wonderful Mercado Event Center. The one thing I enjoy perhaps the most is my versatile Client base and I’m never worried about getting bored.
Variety is the spice of my life and with four generations of my family working with me to make “Dream Events a reality one family (or barter) at a time from Fort Worth, Texas,” I can assure you that resilience and perseverance along with an open mind and heart are how my team and I have weathered every storm and are still going stronger than ever rolling into our 9th year of more adventures, more families and more fun.
I’m at Allred Unit this Wednesday with several clients and hopefully, Mary’s paperwork will be moved through the channels in order for her wedding to be approved by February 20th this month.
At this point, getting Mary and Lester married as soon as possible might just put an end to the widespread comments regarding their unique relationship.
The continued emails regarding my Hughes Unit Groom and his Bride continue. Yes, I know that he was on I’m A Killer Episode 4 and no I don’t google anyone who happens to be an inmate either. My TDCJ Clients aren’t obligated to disclose the reasons their loved one is incarcerated AND I don’t ask either.
For those of you who realized that “you had seen him before” that felt compelled to email me and ask for his name, the reason I didn’t use names on the post was specifically because the Bride told me about the “I’m A Killer” while we were waiting on the groom.
I was unaware of the show prior to booking the event but, even if I had known, it wouldn’t have altered my decision to marry the couple. Television rarely holds my interest. I prefer to read when relaxing and enjoy learning new things and spending time with my family.
While in San Antonio for this wedding, I am enjoying spending time with my family. The luxury of creating my businesses was to not only help others needing event services but also to spend the time I had missed all of these years working for someone else with my family which is why I created Texas Twins Events in the first place.
The twins and Maddy had a great time at Fiesta Texas and I’m looking forward to seeing them later for a late dinner.
My niece, Leigh Ann is handling photography at the wedding tomorrow and my twin sister, Cindy will be taking care of her three granddaughters while Leigh Ann and I spend a few hours on location with our happy couple.
Leigh Ann loves her new SUV and it is really coming in handy for our road trips too. We now have four suvs and two trucks. My team have learned that cars just don’t cut it in the event business. A few months ago, one reader asked why “most of my brides don’t wear a wedding dress?” The reason for this is that Prison Visitation Dress codes often limit what my clients can wear and at certain Units, even a dress isn’t allowed.
Other Units are more flexible. I always wear a suit and often sandals or easy to remove footwear as I’m screened along with my Client which requires removing my shoes upon entering a Prison. If a bride wants to do a photo shoot in a wedding dress though, she changes clothes AFTER leaving the Unit.
Trishelle wore jeans and a tee shirt to her Michael Unit Wedding but, changed clothes for her photo shoot. Most of my brides bring a change of clothes and if they bring friends or family, they wait for us while we are “inside a Unit” and then join my Client and I later for photos.
“The waiting areas” for friends and family members tend to be cafes, thrift shops and occasionally gas stations as Prisons are often in fairly remote areas.
I don’t ask questions about inmates. Whether it’s a male or female, I don’t judge anyone or their circumstances.
Let me add that Mr Martinez was a perfect gentleman to me who even let me borrow his readers since I’m only allowed to bring one pair of glasses into a Unit and I don’t wear bifocals.
In fact, many inmates share items including readers. My groom told me that there are very few luxuries like reading glasses and was happy to look ke hid in order to read the fine print in my new wedding book that was difficult to see.
The older I get, the bigger font I need and due to my fear of eye surgery, things aren’t going to get better unless of course I can drum up the courage for corrective surgery to my 50 plus year old eyes.
Every inmate I’ve ever met when walking into a Texas Prison has been cordial and kind to me. Miguel was also friendly to me and thrilled to be marrying his beautiful bride for the holidays.
Miguel had a welcoming smile and jovial laugh that immediately put me at ease. Although a number of my readers are concerned about my safety, you shouldn’t be. I’m not in a room alone with an inmate at any time.
Marrying an inmate can be far more nerve wracking for my clients than it is for me because no one expects to be marrying in a Prison. It’s different than what anyone might have expected. There aren’t any flowers. There are rarely any wedding dresses. There aren’t wedding cakes, music, toasts, drunk guests or chaos either.
I like the structure and predictability of Prison Weddings. Why? I’ve had 8 years of unpredictable clients and guests that’s why.
Although I may never be planning a Vow Renewal for Mary or Lester, I will do my best to make their ceremony as special as they are.
Hopefully, Mary and Lester will live happily ever after regardless of the circumstances that drew them together in the first place.
I’m at Allred and Parker County Jail this week and Coffield and Estes Units next week and looking forward to meeting my amazing clients and their future spouses…
The courthouse I was meeting my first client at looked like a Gothic mansion with the overcast sky behind it. 
After helping my client get her license, I jumped back in to my SUV to head to Coryell County Courthouse and sent Cindy a text from my navigation. 
Since Christina didn’t want photos posted, I posed with her husband and bought photos of all three of us as well as one of her and her husband before leaving the Unit for her to keep. 
San Saba Unit is also a female Unit I frequently make trips to as is Hobby. 
Since I’m always asked about this, yes, it’s legal for a male to marry a male or a female to marry a female. This question continues to confuse me. The Units I marry inmates in are located in the United States. 
Completely different health issues is unusual for identical twins but, Cindy has had none of my health issues and I’ve had none of hers. 
My youngest grandniece, Madyson is a ball of fire and not a twin. Maddy is three and a half but her first two years were spent with hearing issues we were unaware of. 
Our clients are our priority. Thirty percent of them don’t want others to know they are marrying an inmate. In fact, we don’t publish photos in order to protect their privacy as a courtesy.
Cindy and I had found the blue fur at a junk shopping after leaving San Saba Unit. The fur was a perfect match to Brandy’s outfit. 
