A journalist called me Saturday who obviously had some unfounded opinions regarding marrying inmates being “all about the money.” How and why this biased belief exists I have no idea but I know this, the people I marry to inmates are dedicated, determined, resilient and do it all alone on the outside. They are warriors. They prove that love is more than a 4 letter word.
Many of you don’t have the support you deserve from family or friends. Many of you feel isolated regarding your decision to marry an inmate. Many of you feel you don’t have anyone to talk to but you do. You have me. I take calls, texts, emails and DM’s 7 days a week from 8AM-9PM. I’m here to listen and I’m here to offer you advice. I’m old and I’m wise and your concerns are important to me.
I had a bride ask me about a prenuptial agreement. She’s planning to marry at Garza East. I can prepare this document for you and understand the need to have one if the inmate has outstanding debts going into the marriage. You need to protect what’s yours. You also need to know that the ONLY way to “catch” your spouses debt is by marrying. Be cautious. Ask questions. Too many people don’t ask about their partners debt. Sexually transmitted debt occurs when a marriage happens. Marriage merges debt.
While many of you might think you don’t have anything to protect, what you are doing is isolating your future spouses debts from your own as well as your assets.
Years ago, twenty to be exact, I was opening my mail when a tax lien popped up. I had never ever had an issue with the IRS. In fact, I’m afraid of very few things but the IRS is one of the the things I’m so terrified of that I overlay my taxes. My ex husband had presented his taxes to me and instructed me to “sign this. We are married now.” By signing that document, I unwittingly assumed half of a $378k tax debt.
It took me months to successfully file an Innocent Spouse case with the IRS. In fact, to educate myself, I took a job at H & R Block to learn more about tax debts in order to represent myself. My ex had a tax attorney. I had myself. Many of you are unaware that I’ve been through some serious shit in my lifetime and had no one to ask for help. No mother or father. No grandparents, aunts or uncles. Cindy and I have always had to “figure it out.”
We have “figured it out” since leaving home at fifteen years old. Cindy and I lived at homeless shelters until we were 16. There has never been an “easy button” for solving problems in our lives. We’ve always had each other and it was Cindy who suggested filing Innocent Spouse. She had heard of it from someone else. If not for Cindy, I would have had no idea how to get rid of that lien or where to start. My credit would’ve been ruined and any money I earned taken to satisfy the debt. I had no choice other than to fight and so I did. I learned a lot about tax law. I enjoy learning about the law and spent many years in courtrooms.
A lot of people wonder why Cindy and I started Texas Twins Events. We created an opportunity that didn’t exist for anyone to enjoy a dream event. We want others to have the wedding we didn’t. We want you to have the flowers the fun photos and the wonderful memories of your life event.
I often advise you of things you need to know when committing yourself and your life to marriage because I don’t want anyone making the same mistakes Cindy or I have in our previous marriages. EXPERIENCE MATTERS. Protecting all of you is my greatest concern.
Many of you feel guilty if you don’t write enough letters or miss a phone call. You shouldn’t. You are living on the outside. You have a house to keep, kids to raise and bills to pay. Your needs should be your primary focus. You can’t save anyone else until you save yourself first. Putting too many people in your boat will drown you. Set limits. Establish boundaries.
I have 2 dealbreakers in my life and in my marriage. Violence and infidelity. I would’ve simply fought the tax lien and stayed married to my second husband if he hadn’t been being unfaithful during the entire marriage. The tax lien was the cherry on top of the cake. I had limits. We all do.
This journalist attempted to advise me of why she thought my clients chose to marry an inmate. I answered her with one of Cindy’s iconic quotes known as Cindyism Quotes.
“I would appreciate your advice and insight if I could overlook your lack of experience.”
I meant what I said although she was surprised I said it. I’m transparent. I’ve been dirt poor. I’ve ate of trash cans as a homeless teen alongside my twin sister. We lived without electricity in our first apartment because we could afford the rent but couldn’t afford electricity. I know what hard times are. I’ve been there and done that.
If you are a journalist, casting producer or media person, what you don’t know and assume to know when talking to me with an attitude will be quickly addressed and quashed. Your ignorance regarding my clients is a sure fire way to light me up. I’m being serious. I know them you don’t. Save your opinions Skippy.
For years now I’ve had production people contact me. My twin and I filmed a television pilot five years ago, Pawning Planners. We’ve also filmed numerous projects and are familiar with creative editing and frankenbiting. Our clients aren’t. Our clients don’t understand media contracts. We advise them about production companies and media portraying them in a less than positive light. We educate and protect them. For reasons I may never understand, media believe that anyone marrying an inmate is a weirdo. They aren’t. People marrying an inmate are warriors. Read that again.
Marrying an inmate is a sacrifice. My clients spend holidays alone. They carefully budget to afford expensive phone calls. They drive long hours to Units. They often put the inmates needs before their own. They are selfless. They are givers.
Many of the media people contacting me are takers. You want to take their story, their journey and their lives and twist their story into a train wreck. I won’t let you. Prey on someone else. I’m well aware of creative editing and fabricating sentences that weren’t spoken. I’m well aware of how production companies twist the truth and create “faux personalities.”
A few years ago, I was contacted on Instagram in March by someone claiming to be casting a prison show. This person wasn’t casting a show because there wasn’t a greenlight. It was March I was busy as Hell in season with clients from all three of my businesses and this jackass wanted me to do his job for him while claiming he had been cleared for a show with funding. I know what a greenlight is. I know what questions to ask. My clients don’t. This guy wanted “beautiful people.” All of my clients are beautiful. This guy wanted names and phone numbers. I told him “I don’t give out my clients information. What I will do is post a flyer and if they are interested they will contact you.” Old Chris was fishing. His job was to find the talent and with my burdened schedule, this idiot wanted me to do his job for him. How convenient. Chris thought I was a hillbilly without realizing that I was filming commercials for Whataburger at 17 years old and well aware of media and production. I’ve worked in the film industry for years. Cindy and I listened to his crazy demands for a few days while we were busy as heck before calling him out on the contract he sent me. He didn’t sign it. Chris thought he was smart. In reality he was a smart ass.
Your stories have value to media outlets. Your lives warrant protecting. A standard reality contract is entirely and wholly one sided. If someone sends you a contract and they are in a hurry for you to sign it, send it to me. I will review it and revise it to protect you. If someone isn’t paying your travel and hotel accommodations, they can’t afford you. Be aware of contracts that take everything you have and give you nothing in return. They exist. They are also called “standard reality contracts.”
Many years ago, Cindy and I were told to fly to LA for “pitch meetings.” Pitch meetings are where your production company introduces you to the network. They want to meet “the talent” AKA, you. Your the talent. I asked “who is paying for expenses?”
The production company answered “we can’t afford to cover travel but we really need you here.” If a production company can’t pay your travel, they can’t afford you. Remember this. It’s important.
Now, back to protecting yourself and your assets and assuming no liability with debts of your fiancée, if you need help creating a document that accomplishes this, contact me. Your money matters.