Category: Coffield Unit

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Rainbows In The Dark & Country Roads Taking Me Home. Palo Pinto To Parker County & More Travels Of The Texas Twins….

Starting my day driving out to Palo Pinto County Jail, a call from my husband had me laughing regarding his statement “every song I sing, I sing for you. Everything I do, I do for you.” The statement itself wasn’t humorous but the memory of my Sanders Estes Client asking me to sing at her wedding a few years ago was. Frankly, I’m not a singer and although I’ve got the passion to belt out a line, I don’t have the voice. My husband doesn’t either but his attempts at singing are hilarious nonetheless. 

My Estes client had wanted music and music isn’t allowed at inmate weddings. To overcome this issue, she had asked me to sing the song for her. Always willing to give any request my best shot, I agreed to do so. Mid song at the Unit though, my bride turned and said “Miss Wendy, I really appreciate you trying to sing the song and all but it’s okay to just say the words instead.” I did lol. 

There are performers out there who really can’t sing but are so outrageous and animated that most people overlook their pitfalls. When it comes to singing, I’m animated but I’m not a singer. Like many of my friends who are drag performers though, I can lip sync and give a helluva performance but without music, my skills are limited to my talent as a singer. On the rare occasions that I have belted out lines, it was because the DJ either didn’t have the entrance music or the CD wouldn’t play. In such cases, I ask the guests to join me in singing whatever the song may be. With my back up, my singing skills or lack of them are barely noticeable. Why? Because there is strength in numbers that’s why. I’m not singing alone because the wedding guests are singing with me. 

One interviewer asked me “how would you describe your experiences as a Prison wedding Officiant?” This was an odd question because the majority of my “experiences” with a client are outside of the prison in the weeks and months of establishing a relationship with my clients. The inmate isn’t the client. The person on the outside is. Prison Weddings are Rainbows In The Dark. Prisons are dark places. Weddings are and always will be a joyous occasion for me regardless of where they take place. Searching my experiences with an army of amazing and determined prison wives and husbands who have chosen to marry an inmate, the best way I can describe my experiences is by first establishing a relationship with my client and then by holding their hand through a confusing and lengthy process before finally meeting on wedding day. My staff and I rarely spend more than an hour “inside” a Unit with clients. We frequently spend several hours driving to and from the Unit to meet our clients however. 

This morning my Estelle Unit client had sent me a text regarding the “Chaplain being evasive about the date.” My job is to be a hand holder. A problem solver. To solve this problem, I called the Unit and confirmed the date and time myself with the Chaplain. It’s always easier and speedier for me to contact the Unit than it is to wait for the Unit to contact me. #ProblemSolved. 

August 22nd is completely booked. Please do not tell any Unit that this date will work for you and I. It won’t. My schedule at Texas Prisons is booked 2-3 weeks out. 

If your Unit is within 2 hours of a confirmed booking at another Unit, I can perform my confirmed booking in the morning or afternoon and accommodate hours in the morning or afternoon. The secondary Unit must be within 2 hours of my currently booked and confirmed Unit. Certain Units and cities offer a degree of flexibility due to the number of Units nearby in Huntsville, Gatesville and Tennessee Colony. 

The busiest and most popular Texas days for a Prison wedding are Tuesday and Thursday. Be aware that Tuesday and Thursday are always booked first and don’t simply assume that I “can squeeze you in.” Double bookings or more than one Unit in any given day are subject to my availability and discretion. 

Bouncing from one Unit to the next takes a large degree of planning. For years now, I’ve performed 2 and on rare occasions even 3 weddings on the same day but…it’s stressful and exhausting. I prefer to “max” myself at 2 weddings per day whenever possible. I can do up to 6 weddings and the same Unit and I have which is far less stressful than moving to another location to perform another ceremony at a secondary Unit. 

This afternoon on a call to Leigh Ann after seeing 2 messages from California regarding prison weddings, yet another argument ensued about how “stressful” walking into a prison is for my niece. 

Cindy and I have been “footing the bills” for our adult children all of their lives and it’s not an easy decision to tell my niece to suck it up but, it is a conversation that I was forced to have with her because I cannot fly back and forth to California to perform prison weddings when my mainstay of bookings is in Texas and surrounding states. I have people contacting me for Prison Weddings in California. I have a niece that bought a new car against the wishes of her mother and I and I have a niece who is a shopaholic that loves living the fine life. On a seamans salary with a young child and eventually being stationed at Point Mugu, Leigh Ann must take on gigs in order to pay her bills. 

For nearly four years, Leigh Ann moved home while Alex was stationed abroad and didn’t pay rent or buy groceries. Her mother and I paid all of her expenses while she shopped, got her nails and hair professionally done and then decided months prior to moving to California to buy a new car? 

How do you teach your adult children about entitlement? How do you teach them to supplement their income by working gigs and figuring it out? The conversation with Leigh Ann was less than friendly because quite frankly, if I have to travel to California to perform these weddings myself, I’m assuredly not going to pay Leigh Ann while I’m performing the work myself. 

Conversations with Leigh Ann regarding money are consistently infuriating for not only I but also her mother. We love Leigh Ann but at some point educating her about caviar wishes on a beer budget are in order here. 

Her husband, Alex is studying to take a test that will increase their income however, the possibility that he won’t pass the test exists. I asked Leigh Ann “what are you going to do if Alex doesn’t pass?” It’s a valid question. Alex is shouldering all of the responsibility. 

I’m highly concerned about teaching Leigh Ann to budget or to work to supplement her income. I cannot book a gig in California unless I’m certain that Leigh Ann is going to show up. Cindy and I discussed this at length. “We could stack them and rent two cars then spread out and get everyone covered” Cindy suggested. 

Cindy is effectively “simplifying” our schedules because we are already booked in California with other events. I can’t be everywhere and Cindy can’t either. 

Will Leigh Ann overcome her fear of entering a prison without having a panic attack? Only time will tell. Leigh Ann can certainly book beach weddings as an Officiant and photography. She’s a very experienced photographer and has a portfolio. 

What will I do if my niece doesn’t want to continue performing prison weddings? Cindy and I will have to travel to other states as we do in Texas to perform them ourselves. 

Today Leigh Ann is upset with me but, when she realizes that her mother and I won’t continue to cover her expenses, reality is going to bite. 

Meanwhile, my son had called yesterday while leaving New Boston and heading to Chocktaw Casino to meet a couple who had met there and wanted to marry in a parking lot. I literally have no down time. Cindy listened as I explained that my son’s wife birthday party must be moved to Monday as there isn’t any way I can squeeze it in on Sunday. 

My son is acting very overprotective about his wife’s pregnancy and he’s also been pretty cranky lately. Last month he turned down a wedding at Tarrant County and told me “I’m not comfortable there. It’s difficult to park and a real hassle.” Hmm, working and travel are a hassle? Picking and choosing Units? I could go on and on here. 

Attempting to educate our adult children about finances is a never ending saga. I don’t have a money tree dropping bills every morning and no one else does either. Cindy and I are both overwhelmed with trying to keep our families happy while our families continue to want more, more, more. 

This afternoon in Parker County, my niece Stephaney told me “I’m bored. I hate staying at home. I want to go have fun.” What the? Go have fun? Fun costs money. 

For several months now, Cindy has been buying Stephaney’s cigarettes and gave her a credit card “for emergencies” when we are on the road. Those “emergencies” have included taking friends to lunch or dinner and buying cocktails. 

In one week alone, Stephaney charged over $300 for “emergencies.” As usual, Cindy told me “we eat at fast food restaurants, I never buy anything for myself. I color my own hair. I wear the same clothes and I cannot for the life of me get any help from anyone in my own house. The twins stay in their rooms unless they want something. Stephaney is bored and spending money like water. I bend over backwards trying to accommodate everyone putting my own needs last and now we are looking at the twins wanting cars and paying for drivers ed while Steph complains about not having a car. These people think we are rich. How do I tell her to stop charging this card up?” 

This was a problem. Cindy never tells me problems until they are so big that they begin to weigh on her. 

My twin is soft. She’s easy. I’m far more challenging when it comes to our adult children. Cindy and I walked into Whataburger to order a chicken salad while looking over the latest $300 plus charges to that “emergency credit card.” 

Sitting down to wait on our salads, I fell Cindy “here we are eating at Whataburger while I look at charges from Chili’s, On The Boarder and other “nicer than we are eating at” restaurants. What the? Your husband is eating at truck stops and we are either packing our lunches or hitting convenient spots to grab a bite on the run while Steph is out parting because she’s bored sitting at home? You cook, you clean, you pick up after the entire household and the last thing you need to be doing is handing out a credit card to someone who doesn’t work and has no plans to start. Steph needs to start pitching in and helping you. She’s never paid rent. She’s made plenty of mistakes. She wants another car because she’s went through 4 in 4 years AND NOW the twins each want their own car? Teach these people to fish. Let them go find a job and save up to buy a car while buying gas and insurance. Teach them to be thankful for what they have and what we go through to make sure they have it. Cut WAY back and the next time someone tells you they are bored, hand em a broom and tell em to start cleaning. We work our butts off. Our husbands work their butts off. We have given these people everything we never had and it’s still not enough. Start saying no before the stress of shouldering all of these monkeys kills you.” 

Over our $6 lunches, I also added “none of them appreciate all of the cars we’ve bought, all of the repairs we’ve paid for or anything we’ve given or provided that no one gave us. Fifteen years old and on our own, we figured it out. We had no one. They have both of us.” 

My son has a new truck and a new custom home. Leigh Ann and Alex are moving to a beautiful two story townhome and spending two months in a Marine Hotel in San Diego while spending their free time shopping and enjoying the beach with Maddy. 

Our kids live well but they live well because Cindy and I cover the overdrawn checking account here or there or we send money via Paypal and all of our children and grandchildren know that we will fix whatever because we are the fixers. 

But, one day my husband and Cindy’s husband will retire. One day this gravy train is going to stop rolling and when it does, I’m very concerned about our adult children and their expectations colliding. 

I’ve been trying to “ween” my family for ten years now. Since I turned 45 years old and realized that giving my son a credit card was a mistake. I had quickly realized that my son and his friends were having a grand old time at my expense. 

I’m “tougher” than Cindy and my sons question after months of living the high life were ended with him questioning me  “why are you taking my credit card?” HIS credit card? What the? 

Parents, do yourselves a favor and DO NOT GIVE your kids a credit card. Make them go to work and get their own credit cards. Make them pay the bill. Teach them to fish. 

Cindy has time to teach Steph to fish by taking that credit card back. Man, if our husbands had any real clue what we spend on our children and grandchildren, they would FLIP OUT. They have no children or grandchildren. Why these two have stuck around with our circus of a family I have no idea. Unconditional love must surpass everything is the only answer I can find to my consistent question of why my husband still comes home to “chaos central” around here. There’s always something going on. ALWAYS. 

Steve wishes he was home every night? Cindy wishes she was on the road 5-6 days a week and AWAY from home. You get the point. 

Cindy and I are literally all over the place the next few weeks and who knows what September holds as Prison Weddings in Texas aren’t scheduled until 7-10 days prior to the wedding. I was recently asked “what’s your schedule in October” by someone wanting to film in October. I can give you my weekend schedule but my weekdays go in 2 week intervals since I’m not notified of scheduling until 2 weeks prior to the event. 

My traditional bookings and Vow Renewals on evenings and weekends are scheduled years in advance but if you want me to tell you what Units I will be at in October, I have no idea until mid September in Texas. 

Other states only allow prison weddings once a year, twice a year, every three months and so on. Texas weddings are either on Tuesday, Weds, Thursday or Friday the 1st and 3rd weeks or the 2nd and fourth weeks. You may go a week doing nothing then the next week working Tuesday through Friday. Scheduling prison weddings is unpredictable and chaotic because the Officiant doesn’t control the scheduling. The Chaplain calls with dates but finding a date that works with my existing schedule is challenging. Often, I must choose the 2nd and rarely 3rd date options. 

I’m hoping that Leigh Ann adjusts in California and becomes bolder about walking into a prison. I’m also hoping my son and his wife learn patience with this pregnancy and Cindy learns to limit her generosity. I’m hoping that the twins starting school next Thursday flows smoothly and I’m hoping that eventually Stephaney decides to go back to work and buys her own car but, expecting Cindy and I to pay for everything for the rest of our lives isn’t going to continue to happen. We are trying to teach our children and grandchildren to be independent and it’s not an easy conversation or conversion… 

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Learning Curves- When Love Isn’t Enough & Other Factors In The Prison Wedding Planning Process…

For several weeks now, I’ve been talking to one of my brides about not only her concerns but my own as well regarding marrying an inmate that she’s only “known since December.” The inmate is somewhat manipulative and controlling which highly concerns me. 

Yesterday’s phone call came while I was going down the list of calls to Chaplains and law libraries for several clients waiting on I60’s to be processed. I took a break to listen to Samantha’s concerns and scheduling at Jordan Unit. The inmate had requested a transfer to another Unit which effectively puts a “hold” on wedding scheduling. This “hold” would help give Samantha time to re evaluate marrying. 

Samantha had called me to advise me that the transfer had been denied. After twenty minutes of discussing whether or not Samantha wanted to move forward, it was decided that we would “stall this wedding” until July or August due to a number of things that the inmate was doing to control her life from behind bars. 

Let’s go over a few of these “issues” to better grasp the red flags flying high in what should be a joyous journey for the bride on the outside but, in Samantha’s situation, isn’t. 

A few weeks ago, on another phone call, Samantha told me that the inmate had her sending $200 a month “for their future.” I found this not only odd but also manipulative and voiced my concerns. I also listened carefully about other problems in the relationship. What were they? First, the inmate didn’t want Samantha to wear makeup or “look too attractive.” Samantha is a waitress and her appearance is important. Also, the inmate didn’t want Samantha to take her children swimming because “you will be wearing a bathing suit and I don’t want other men hitting on you.” The monetary demands along with Samanthas “life on the outside” were greatly being affected by the inmate who was also in a hurry to get married. The “hurry” was for the inmate to have more control. 

Slowing this wedding down was in Samantha’s best interest. In fact, canceling it would be in her best interest but, I can only give my clients advice. It’s not my role to tell them who not to marry. I carefully advise clients without overstepping bounds. I also point out things they may not realize while I’m at it. With Samantha, I’ve been worrying about her future for a month now. 

Meanwhile, my Diboll Unit bride has decided not to marry. She sent me a text last night wanting to gift her new with tags size 12 petite dress to another bride in an effort “to be part of the reason they smile on wedding day.” I found this selfless act while struggling with her own heartbreak just another reason of why my prison clients are such giving and compassionate individuals. 

For those unaware of this, the person “on the outside” is doing time too. They are pulling the wagon alone. They are paying all of the bills, raising children and making every sacrifice to make their relationship work. It’s astounding how determined and resilient they are. For Gabriella, her desire to give a dress she loved and planned to marry in herself is a wholly generous and selfless proposition. 

My clients are both passionate and perseverant. I pray that one day Gabriella finds someone worthy of her. When she does, I will marry her. 

After months of overcoming a CLM issue at TDCJ Telford Unit, I’m really looking forward to finally meeting my bride in August. CLM or CLW issues DRAMATICALLY slow the usual timelines of 4-6 weeks turnaround down. In fact, we can wait months to resolve an unexpected issue. Patience is a virtue in the prison wedding planning process. Knowing how to overcome an unexpected issue is key to moving forward. I find solutions. 

I’m headed back to Torres Unit in Hondo, Texas and looking forward to meeting two special brides who also plan to marry on the same day. My McConnell brides are too. 

Cindy and I are really looking forward to seeing Amanda again at Ellis Unit. We had met her a few months ago for family photos in Eastland, Texas and had a great time on location with my grandnieces and her children playing together. 

Many of my brides are sending me photos of what they plan to wear. This is always a great idea and I’m happy to go over your outfit with you. My Crain and Woodman Grooms don’t need to do this as they will be wearing dress shirts and slacks well within TDCJ guidelines. Please do not bring paper money on wedding day to purchase photos. Bring quarters. Unit photos are $3 each. I will buy three and make copies for you. If you wish to buy more, bring your quarters in a ziplock bag and do not bring more than $21 into the Unit. No cell phones. No paper money. No cameras. You MUST BRING your state issued ID or Passport AND your marriage license. If you have handwritten vows, hand them to me PRIOR to entry.  

I’d like to wish all of my July clients from years gone by a Happy Anniversary. I remember all too well how nervous and excited you were on wedding day. We’ve shared precious moments together on location. Meeting your families and sharing your joy is a gift to not only myself but also my staff. 

I am often asked “what I remember the most on location at events?” I remember my clients smiles, their joy and their immense gratitude at finding the love of their life. Soul mates are difficult to find but, my clients did. I remember being hugged walking up to you and how happy you were that the day had finally come. 

Weddings are and will always be my favorite events. Vow Renewals are equally joyous as are baptisms but seeing our families again for a celebration whether it’s the birth of a child or a Vow Renewal or even a birthday party is a family reunion for my Team and I. Clients are the fabric of our lives. Many people are surprised at how often previous clients rebook but they shouldn’t be. Our clients have established a bond with us. In many cases even a death in their family is a rebooking for a celebrant and planner at their loved ones memorial. 

I will always remember how joyous Burt and Deanna were on their wedding day. It had been raining in the park they chose to marry in. The tulips hadn’t bloomed so Burt planted imitation tulips. Burt paid attention to the details. Burt and his friends from Carswell AFB had also draped fabric from the trees. 

Two years after marrying Burt & Deanna, an email from Deanna trying to locate me through Gig Salad came in. “You married us and you may not remember us. We are a military couple from Carswell AFB. We need your help. We want you to baptize our baby.” Because Gig Salad limits correspondence unless the client books you, I was unable to share my phone number or contact information with Deanna. But, I easily located her phone number after walking into my home office and pulling files for the three years of weddings to locate my client records for Deanna. 

I keep detailed records of client correspondence and bookings. I quickly sent a text to tell her I would call her. She excitedly told me “we are pregnant and I wouldn’t want anyone but you to baptize our baby. Please tell me you will be available to Bless our child. We are overjoyed at this miracle.” 

Thinking to myself ” I WILL MAKE time,” I checked my schedule. Cindy and I were traveling back and forth to California as we were filming This Time Next Year but I went ahead and told Deanna that “if I needed to catch a flight from LAX to DFW on short notice I could fly to DFW and back to LAX in order to accommodate Burt and Deanna’s request.” 

I’m constantly checking distances and scheduling. The flights from DFW to LAX are easy and quick. I always leave a car at DFW and have a rental waiting at LAX. Fluidity and planning ahead are key to addressing our numerous clients. There isn’t a day that goes by I’m not checking distance from one prison unit to the next to see if I can move from Unit A to B and even C on the same day. I map out my timelines over and over again. If a Unit is within 2 hours of a booked Unit, it’s usually doable. But if the secondary Unit is 3 or more hours from the booked Unit, we must look at the next available date instead. 

Booked Prison Unit Dates are non moveable. Once I’ve confirmed a date, it’s literally “set in stone” at a prison. 

A few months later while in my home office preparing a ceremony for a house blessing, Deanna called me again. This phone call was far from the joyous earlier call. This call was drought with sad news. Deanna was crying. Baby Delilah phone had Trisomy and Deanna needed me to be able to get to Harris Hospital on short notice as Delilah was only expected to live a few short hours. I was crushed. 

In fact, I was speechless. I’d never heard of Trisomy. I grabbed a Merck Manual to educate myself. I can’t imagine how Deanna must have felt at her OB/GYN appointment during that check up. I couldn’t imagine how carrying a child with the odds of survival being so slim would affect anyone as joyous at conceiving as Deanna was could accept this devastating blow. I mourned for her. I grieved for the child that had blessed their marriage. I prayed. I also prepared. 

For a number of years, I was a volunteer hospice clergy at area hospitals. Sadly, the stress and reality of many patients facing death was simply too much for me mentally. I stopped volunteering after at Baylor and Harris. How doctors handle death daily it I have no idea.

Deanna had added “we will also need you to perform the memorial. Burt and I wouldn’t want anyone other than the person who married us to handle such an emotional and important role.” My heart sank. I knew how difficult it must have been for Deanna to place that call to me. I also knew that as she carried the baby she so desperately wanted that she was hoping for a miracle. I did too. I prayed Delilah would defy the odds. I would continue to pray for months. 

A few months later, the call came. Cindy and I were scheduled at Iheart radio in Dallas. We went to see Burt and Deanna first to check timelines of Delilahs possible birth. There was time to run to Dallas and return to Fort Worth. Cindy and I dashed through our interviews to run back to Burt and Deanna. Delilah was tiny. The smallest baby I’ve ever seen. Cindy and I were surprised by the number of Carswell military members in the room. 

Beyond Deanna’s bed were at least 15-20 AFB coworkers of Burt and Deanna. They were all crying. A room packed with crying soldiers is something you won’t forget. The sadness in the room literally sucked the air from my lungs. I tried to breathe deeply and focus on staying professional and remembering my role walking into that room and past the mourners. Hats in hand, their silent tears said it all. You could hear a pin drop and sniffles over the machines and medical equipment. 

Holding my composure and emotions inside in order to perform the bedside baptism was incredibly difficult. At that moment, I still harbored hope that Delilah would make it. Cindy looked at me from the back of the room with the military personnel to give me the “don’t cry. Your role is to comfort” pep talk as she too wiped away her tears. Cindy knew I was terrified of losing my composure. We had discussed it over and over again. 

Minutes after the above photo was taken, Burt and Deanna told me “we only have a few hours.” I was again literally crushed. I was also enlightened as to why Delilah wasn’t in an incubator. 

By the time I lifted baby Delilah to perform her baptism, my sorrow was so profound that my tears dropped silently on the child this couple had so desperately wanted. I couldn’t hide my sadness. 

A few days later, I performed baby Delilahs memorial wearing the same vestment that I had married Burt and Deanna in. Deanna had asked that I wear the same thing I had met them wearing two years prior at Sampson Park. Delilah wore a gown handcrafted from Deanna’s wedding dress. 

I remember staying up all night working on my ceremony. The details of how I had met the Villareals. The moment of Burt happily walking up to me. The look on his face as Deanna approached us. The man gently playing guitar behind us. The sun breaking through the grey summer day bringing light and promise. I remember every aspect of any ceremony that I’ve ever performed. 

Life Events are Life Moments. Saying goodbye to Delilah was the hardest ceremony that I’ve ever performed in my life as an Officiant, Planner and Celebrant. 

My role is to comfort families as a celebrant but, it was difficult to mask my own emotions. Loss always is. Death is a dark stranger but the death of a child is and always will be the most difficult role that I have ever played. 

Deanna never recovered from the loss of Delilah. I doubt she ever will. She has lost the ability to try to conceive again. Burt and Deanna are praying that they can adopt. I’m praying for them. They are wonderful people who would joyously love to parent a child together. 

The relationship I share with my clients is remarkably intimate. They trust myself and my Team to understand their journey. For some, the journey is far more difficult. Surprises. Setbacks. No one expects them but, whether you are planning an elaborate event or planning a prison wedding, there can be extraordinary circumstances that you didn’t expect. Rain at an outdoor venue. A transfer of the inmate less than 24 hours before their scheduled wedding. These things are beyond our control but, we will work through them together. 

For others like Samantha or Gabriella, they might need a kind word or even advice. I’m there for them. I listen to their concerns. I guide them. They need someone to listen. For my prison wedding clients, it’s not uncommon for them to tell me “you are the only person I can talk to.” In many cases, I am. 

Making arrangements and smoothing the path is my specialty. It’s very important to me that clients aren’t worried about things I can address on their behalf. Experience matters. I’m in the Life Events business. There are no do overs. My events are as humanly close to perfect as possible. Cindy and I give others the weddings we never had ourselves. We care far more than anyone realizes because we know how important the details are to our clients. 

I cried at Delilahs memorial and I cried at her baptism. I cried for the child my clients so desperately wanted but couldn’t keep. I will never forget the moments I’ve shared with any of my couples. 

Perhaps I’m different because I care so much but my clients are all like my own children. I want what’s best for all of them. I want them happy. I celebrate their successes and I mourn their losses. I pray Burt and Deanna find a baby to adopt and shower with love.

A special anniversary wish for my ladies who shared a friendship ceremony a few years ago goes out to three amazing ladies. 

Two of these ladies I married to each other and one of these three friends is still waiting to find the right partner. They are out there Lorraine and I know that one day you too will find a life partner.Bouncing from exclusive venues to Prisons, backyards, parks and other interesting and varied locations throughout wedding season keeps me from ever being bored. Cindy and I love to load up and hit the road on our way to meet amazing clients. 

Our Huntsville client who contacted us through The Pawning Planners several weeks ago loves her photos and is still trying to find Mr Right. We never did find a way to effectively “flip the two headed fox stole” she had bartered in exchange for her photo shoot. If you are interested in a two headed fox stole missing an eyeball, PLEASE give us a shout. We ship AND deliver. This stole needs a new home. 

If you missed the blog on the Huntsville client and the unique circumstances of her request for services, here’s the link– The Pawning Planners- Turning Trash Into Treasure. More Flips, Flops & Fun Adventures.

We have several Vow Renewals coming up over the next two years from previous prison clients who have contacted us to schedule. A special shout out of congratulations to my Darrington, Estes, Coffield, Michael, Bridgeport, Estelle, Hobby and Stiles Unit clients who have excitedly shared their good news with me. We look forward to seeing ya all again soon. 

One of my clients from Michael Unit wanted to plan her Vow Renewal for ten years away. This IS UNUSUAL. Another client I married a few months ago who asked me to wear camouflage attire to her wedding also has scheduled for ten years away. Good Lord, I hope I’m still alive. 

Ten years out is a lifetime away but, God willing, my Team and I will honored to see you all again.

From prisons to venues and everywhere in between, I’ve decided to cut back from large over the top events. 2019 will be our last year of chaotic and unpredictable events with too many Indians and not enough Chiefs on location. 

My reasons for declining future “large budget events” is based entirely on years of one surprise after another and clients opting not to hire enough security with open bars on site. From arrests to injuries on location, I have far more fun as does my Team with smaller parties of 200 or less guests.I’ve been asked about groom tossing. This tradition is fun but can also be dangerous. How so? The groom in California became entangled in the lights. He could also have fallen. Because of the liability associated with groom tossing, we ask about traditional aspects when planning your wedding or Vow Renewal to ensure that there aren’t accidents or injuries on location. We want your event seamless and worry free. 

I’m going to once again “go over” guests jumping in front of my photographers to get their own photos on location. For years now, my photographers have complained about trying to angle around guests who jump up to take their own photos. PLEASE REFRAIN from doing this. You are killing the shot for a photographer who has been hired to capture the shot. It’s often impossible to crop guests out of photos they’ve literally jumped into. 

A few weeks ago, this “guest with a phone or camera” scenario jumping into the shot ruined several photos. We have one shot at a photo on location. It’s a moment that cannot be duplicated. 

Please do not jump in front of photographers. If you’d like to take your own photo, give our photographers time to get the shot and THEN take your own photo. This isn’t a competition. It’s a Life Event. 

If you are in a photo taking a photo, it’s not only difficult and occasionally impossible to crop you but also time consuming adding more stress to my photographers during the editing process. Give the couple the opportunity to have beautiful photos of THEIR EVENT. The continued issues of people jumping into a shot roll on but, courtesy would mandate that if you see a photographer trying to capture a photo that you step out of the shot or… put your phone down and strike a pose instead. 

I’m at Ferguson, Ellis, Michael, Coffield & Green Bay Units in the coming weeks and as excited as you are that your wedding day has finally come to fruition. Please remember to err on the side of caution regarding your attire at your prison wedding.

For my California prison clients, the dress code is far more stringent. Be aware of this. If you need me to send you the dress code, I’m happy to do so. No one wants to wear a cafeteria smock. 

For my Arkansas prison clients, the wait is nearly over and we look forward to meeting you very soon at your wedding.

The continued questions regarding guests at weddings because you’ve seen guests in Louisiana at Prisons question keeps coming up. Louisiana allows guests. Texas in nearly ALL cases does not. The ONLY Unit in Texas that has allowed guests present is Sanders Estes Venus, Texas. Requests for guests must be submitted to the Warden by the inmate. BUT, I’ve never had ANY Unit other than Estes Approve a guest of guests at a prison wedding. We cannot bring rings to your prison wedding. Section K of the Administrative Directive pertaining to Offender Property in Texas specifically forbids ring exchanges. I’m sorry but, we follow ALL rules at prison weddings. 

If you’d like to bring friends or family with you to your prison wedding, you can but THEY MUST WAIT in the parking lot. They are WELCOME to join you at your photo shoot with us and I encourage you to bring friends or family with you to incorporate your friends and family into your photos. The more the merrier.Cindy and I will pack my SUV with enough bouquets, tiaras, furs, fascinators, signs and props to accommodate up to 6 other people at your photo shoot. 

I created an inventory that “rolls with me” to your prison wedding. From pink multi to teal multi to red multi bouquets and bouteniers or even mink coats and clothing in your size, my inventory is always a hit with our clients. We think of everything so you don’t have to. If you can’t wear your wedding dress to your Unit wedding, bring it with you and change clothes for your bridal photos. 

If you’d like to change clothes a few times to have a wider variety of photo options, bring additional clothing changes with you as well. Your photo location can be at a courthouse, city street, field, farm, abandoned building or anywhere near the Unit. It CANNOT be on Unit property though. We MUST leave the Unit to find a location nearby. Try to wear something without patterns on the fabric to your photo shoot in order for us to capture a “clean shot.” 

Solid colors are perfect for your photo shoot. Large, bold or busy patterns can be distracting. We have a wide array of tiaras and furs as well as scarves and shawls to add to your attire on photo shoot location events. 

It’s not unusual for our clients to bring their mother, grandmother, children and grandchildren to their photo shoot and we encourage making your photo shoot a family affair and opportunity to capture family photos together sharing your wedding day. 

From best friends to grandmothers and even pets, your photo shoot should incorporate what’s important to you. If there is someone special in your life sharing your journey from the outside, invite them along. We won’t be in the Unit for more than an hour in most cases. 

 Jozette brought her amazing grandmother to Torres Unit in Hondo, Texas. I packed an assortment of evening jackets as well as furs, bouquets and tiaras to bring fun. 

These two ladies were amazing good sports at an abandoned hotel near the Unit that I saw driving to Torres. My Coffield Unit bride loved the building near Tennessee Colony I saw driving past on my way to meet her. If you have noticed a unique old building, storefront or interesting building, just let me know. We will follow you there. 

I’ve been asked about our fascinators. Cindy and I stopped selling them a few years ago. Why? Because our clients love them. We incorporated them into our photo booth props instead. Cindy makes the fascinators by hand. I create the floral designs.  

We add to our inventory year round to keep it fresh and fun. From tiaras to furs to even wedding dresses, having everything our clients need is essential to exceeding their expectations. 

Buildings with murals also make great backdrops for location photography. My Bridgeport bride loved the unique wall art I found on my last trip to Bridgeport Unit and we found a wide array of great photo ops using the landscape of Bridgeport. Just keep your eyes open driving to visit and look for “out of the ordinary” locations. 

The best location for photos in Abilene is Jacobs Dream at Abilene Christian University. It’s perfect. If you are marrying at Robertson Unit, be sure to go by the university and check it out. Cindy and I along with the Texas Twins Events Team look forward to meeting you, your friends, your family and your inmate at your prison wedding soon. 

In unique situations, I become the mother I have never had to clients that need a friend. Samantha is reconsidering her decision to marry. It’s an important decision. Choose carefully. Life partners are worth waiting for. You can’t find the right one if you are “saddled up” with the wrong one… 

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“UNLESS you have MADE the JOURNEY, never ATTEMPT to OFFER others, DIRECTIONS for their TRIP”

While going over event details with a client from my home office last night, my husband overheard me suggest hiring an outside bartender and security for an upcoming prom themed birthday party for 110-120 guests in November. My husband was getting a martini at the bar in my office. Occasionally when dealing with other vendors, I need a drink myself which is why I chose one of our three dens with an adjoining bar as my home office. True story. 

Many vendors will chase a dollar to make a dime. They lose businesses everyday over their inability to retain and keep clients. But, I don’t have the time to buy a venue and am therefore cautious with clients needing one. I ask the questions because I need the answers. My role as a planner is to make Events as affordable as possible. Budgeting is key. There are no friends in the events industry that can gain my client based on our relationship of friendship. Here’s how they can though- by offering the best value for my client. Sounds simple but, believe me it isn’t. Brand loyalty is built. 

Years ago, my husband bought not one but two Cadillac’s from me before getting the courage to ask me out to dinner. I also had advised him of ways to cut the costs of buying a luxury vehicle. I’m honest. My clients wouldn’t buy from anyone else at Cadillac, GMC or Hummer. Why? I earned their trust and whenever possible I also found and made the best car deal for them. 

My husband and I met while I was going through a divorce. It was a war. My ex had taken the car I believed he had bought in my name back and effectively left me without a vehicle. I had a son to get to school. I had to get to work. I also had to pay my lecherous attorneys. The solution? Visiting the dealership that serviced my vehicle. You know the one that I thought I owned and didn’t. I pitched myself as a salesperson. I also obtained a position within an industry that I had never worked in before. I had sold furs, jewelry, filmed commercials with Mel Tillis and worked as a high end print and commercial model for over twenty years at the time I married. 

But, I needed a car. Luxury car dealerships provided demos. I needed one. I also needed insurance and an income. Cadillac gave me all three. Building a client base required thinking outside the box. The old dogs on the sales floor had established clients. I needed my own. To overcome this obstacle, I hired my former photographer and ran my own print ads. Not just anywhere though. I ran these ads in area country clubs. Targeting consumers who could afford luxury cars. 

The same people at country clubs just like my rich and soon to be ex husband who played golf at, had drinks in the Men’s Only club at and dined at while I was effectively chasing a dime to make a dollar. 

The first ad at Ridglea Country Club shocked him. “Working as a car salesmen? What are my friends going to think? Come home and stop this. We can work it out. I will give you your Deville back. I don’t like everyone at the club seeing my wife in an evening dress pitching cars!” Hmm, I didn’t care. After all, my ex took the car he claimed to have bought me in my name back leaving me afoot with a son. He did this to force me into crawling back. Instead, I crawled away. 

That first ad sold 11 Cadillac’s, 2 Hummers and 3 GMC SUVs. I was smiling all the way to the bank. My ads brought clients in. My honesty sold them. My reputation earned me award after award. I was sought after. When people walked into the dealership holding a flyer from Ridglea, Colonial, Shady Oaks or Rivercrest Country Club they weren’t looking for my competitors on the sales floor, they were looking for me. If they didn’t have an appointment, they waited on me to be available too. 

I had also done something in the car industry no one had ever done before and I could support myself in style because of it. I didn’t need my Deville back. I needed an income, a vehicle, insurance and independence. Cadillac and my ability to think outside the box gave me all of the things I needed. My history surprises people. I’ve never been lucky. I’ve always been resilient. Did I expect to find a husband at Cadillac? No. I wasn’t looking. It was the first time in my entire life that I wasn’t worried about my future. I didn’t date. I wore my wedding ring to work and even had a photo of my ex in my office. I was all business all the time. 

My current husband had bought an SRX from me a year before walking into the dealership to tell me he hated it. I had another client in my office and asked him to wait in the lobby. I was concerned about him being upside down in the SRX and trying to find a way to save him money while closing a sale on an XLR. My solution? A demo. They are thousands less than new cars and carry a warranty. 

I brought him in and explained why I thought it was in his best interest to flip out of the SRX and into the Cadillac Escalade demo that I had been driving. “I’m not concerned about the cost. The SRX reminds me of my ex wife. Your husband must adore you and be so proud of you. I saw your billboard on the highway. You’re smart, successful, honest and upfront. He is a lucky man.” 

Snap. My faux personal life of being happily married was crushed and exposed. I started crying in my office on the salesfloor in front of all the salesmen. Damnit. My acting skills and my life were off fleek. Caught with my guard down. I had successfully created a faux personal life away from work that was so believable that I nearly believed it myself after years of faking it through my divorce. I’m a helluva actress but, Matthew broke my charade. 

I looked up and explained. “I’m not married. I’m divorced. I pretend to be married because I’m here to sell cars not find a date. It’s easier to pretend to be married.” This was how I met my husband. Shocking but true. I retired from Cadillac a year later. I didn’t need Cadillac anymore and started my own business instead. 

My new husband wanted me off the sales floor 50-60 hours a week and enjoying life with him, my son, my twin sister and new twin grandnieces. 

A few folks in the DFW area may remember my twin ad for Escalade “Got a big family? Get an Escalade.” Yes, even my family members were in my print ads. THAT ad sold the heck out of Escalades for me. Two sets of twins is a big family. My son and his equipment for sports was also used in another ad showing how much room for friends, kids and equipment the SRX had while being a crossover vehicle. 

My entire family became “models” during my years at Cadillac but, the twin ads and ads featuring me were my best car selling advertising. 

No one had ever been as creative at marketing as I was. But, poverty can define you or empower you. It empowered me. I was a survivor. I walked away from two marriages in twenty years with no money. I walked away with no vehicle both times. I would never do it again. All of my vehicles are paid for in cash and in my name. Although I can trust my current husband, I’ve learned to be independent and will never be dependent on anyone again as long as I live. My husband knows where I’ve been and understands that I refuse to be controlled. In fact, my agreement to marry years ago included a few rules. What were they? 1. I would own my own vehicle outright. 2. I would keep my own checking account and credit cards. 3. I would leave if infidelity ever occurred. 4. I would leave if violence ever entered our marriage. I wasn’t going back to where I had been and was very clear about the terms of committing myself to another husband. 

I don’t think like other people because I’ve also been a buyer. What would sell me? What would create brand loyalty? I’ve been a brand spokesperson for twenty years. I’ve pitched furs, jewelry, couture clothing and even Whatsburger. Building value in the product is essential to building a brand though and it’s difficult to create a great salesperson. Exceptional salespeople are born to sell. Although I’ve been in sales my entire life, I’ve never oversold a client. I’ve always tried to save money or offer discounts whenever possible because I’ve been on the other side as a buyer myself. What makes your product valuable? What makes buyers inclined to buy from you? Honor, integrity and treating my clients like family is why and how I outsold my coworkers in ANY industry I have ever worked in. They treated clients like numbers. I treated clients like family. I’m different. I care. If you’ve ever bought from me, you realize this. Previous clients buy and book with me over and over again. They also refer their friends and family to me. I’ve never advertised after leaving Cadillac and starting my own business. I’ve never had to. 

Kelley (a venue owner) had sent me a DM regarding renting her venue. The catch? Kelley REQUIRED using her own bartender and security. This would significantly “up the cost” to my client. Why? Because I have friends that work as bar tenders as well as retired military and police officers that work as security. Negotiating the additional cost to use Kelley’s security and bartender might or might not be a deal breaker but, due to the distance from the city to her venue, she would certainly need to be open to negotiating her “in season” fee. 

A lot of people fail to realize that there is an “off season” in the Events business but there is. Half of the year leaves venues like an abandoned motel, deserted and lonely. An experienced planner uses this knowledge to her clients benefit and, I often do. August is often too hot for anyone to book a venue with an outdoor area. October and November can be “iffy” too vecause Texas weather is unpredictable. 

Kelley was attempting to pad the bill by adding requirements to rent the venue. I knew it and she knew it too. Chasing a dime to make a dollar. This up charging was why I continued to get other bids from other venues. Kelley’s venue is remote. At least thirty minutes from Fort Worth and an hour from Dallas. 

If you have a venue in the country, lower your prices. Convenience is worth the upcharge to my clients and their guests. Seriously. I know a Burleson venue owner as well as an Azle venue owner that constantly call me to send them business. If your venue business is in the boonies though, attempting to charge the same rental rates as city venues is why you aren’t booking events. 

The client I’m planning the October/November event for has a son in the military. He’s coming home from Germany in late October to early November. She wants to celebrate his birthday and since he missed the prom years ago, incorporate the theme. She also wants a bar with beer and wine. She knows a friend with a barbecue restaurant that can handle catering. We need a building. Decorations. Bartender and security. Photography. DJ. We also have a budget and I always stay within my clients budgets. I will locate a building for her and it will be a building that is within her budget. 

Today after Estes Unit, I’m going to 3 venues. I’m also using this “venue hopping” to price out an anniversary party for August 31st for 70 guests with no bar and a budget remarkably close to the prom themed event. Meaning, the Vow Renewal with far fewer guests and no alcohol will be far easier to come in under budget on. An open bar can easily add $2k and up to the overall budget. Catering can run $12-25 per person and the Vow Renewal client is by far well within the budget he’s given. It’s going to be a stretch with the Prom Themed Birthday Party with an Open Bar and up to 120 guests. A tight stretch. A make every penny count stretch. If the client can secure catering outside of the budget she’s given me, it will be far easier to pull this off but, if she can’t, Wendy and Cindy will be shopping venues first and shopping everything else second since the largest expense is the venue rental. 

Both clients need a venue first. The venue being the most expensive investment. One of these days when I have time, Cindy and I will buy our own venue to alleviate the need to find one for clients but it won’t be this year. We are overwhelmed. 

A few years ago, Kelley called me to send her clients. I thought this was funny. Why? Because Kelley has never referred our services that’s why. It’s always ironic to me that folks who never throw you a bone want you to throw them a steak. 

Luckily though, I don’t need referrals from venue owners. I’m on staff at Belltower Chapel and have been for years. I limit my affiliation with other venues. Why? Because Belltower supports ACH and foster children. I donate 70% of my fee to ACH. 

Other venues outside of Belltower are all about the money. That’s okay. It’s business. 

But- my clients ARE MY BUSINESS and therefore, building value for their buck is why I don’t pitch them a venue just because I know the owner. Instead, I shop them. 

My clients warrant value. I don’t have any “friends” owning a venue who can supersede my clients. I don’t want any friends expecting me to pad their pockets at my clients expense either. 

Last year, another venue owner called me. “We are going to go out of business. We doubled our prices and can’t get any bookings.” I sat my coffee down to rerun what I just heard. 

If common sense was spare change, a few folks couldn’t afford a coffee. “Perhaps you should lower your prices. If a product doesn’t sell, you discount it.” The venue owner wasn’t interested in solving her own problems. “Amazingly, you have never advertised and have grown year after year. Send me your clients. We will even take on LBGT couples. We need what you have.” What the? “Take on LBGT clients?” I was offended. 

My affiliation within the LBGT community was EARNED. Also, I don’t pass around my clients like peanuts at a bar. Humph. How to be politically correct in an obviously incorrect conversation? I went to my office bar and poured myself a chocolate martini. 

This was going to be a LENGTHY CONVERSATION. “Our clients are loyal to us because we are loyal to them. Inflating your costs is why you are losing clients. This should be common sense. You cannot squeeze everything WITHIN THEIR BUDGETS OUT of them. Venue rentals are a buyers market. As a seller, you need to be affordable and when building your brand, you need to be open to other events and clients outside of solely weddings. Weddings have a season. Off season though, you can promote corporate events, family reunions, birthday parties, Christmas parties and other bookings to sustain you through the off season.” 

Of course, this “intelligent and knowledgeable advice” fell on deaf ears. As a businessperson, if you are a business owner, wake up. I can’t wake you up. I can however shop your venue in my clients best interests and budget. “Don’t ask me for an apple and expect me to bake you a pie.” 

Other vendors ARE NOT MY CLIENTS OR MY PROBLEM. MY CLIENTS ARE MY PRIORITY. If you haven’t figured this out yet, I can’t help you. Loyalty is always directed at my clients not people AKA vendors who are crazily expecting me to BUILD THEIR BUSINESS. 

This morning while organizing my floral arrangements for Michael and Coffield Units Tuesday, I took a call for Salano State Prison in California. 

Our existing bookings in California are stacked meaning finding time to travel to a Unit 6 hours from LA, San Diego, Santa Barbara or even Lompoc (all cities Cindy and I will be at during our trip to meet clients, film commitments and family) is tricky. I ran the distance several times from several cities. 

This Unit is at least five hours from any city that Cindy and I will be at in August. Normally, this could be factored in to an off day during our travels but we have two destination event bookings as well as a family reunion and meeting our sister at Magic Mountain on one day as well as filming a sizzle reel on another in LA. I.E. this is another jam packed trip for the Texas Twins. If I can get to the Unit and find time though, I will. 

Leigh Ann is taking over California Prison Weddings however, she will be based in San Diego August and September while her husband, Alex is in training at the Naval Base before moving to base housing at Point Mugu. 

California like Texas is a big state. Because of this, my stepsister, Tammy is also going to be handling Prison Weddings. 

Due to Cindy and my schedule while in California on this trip, trying to judge distance from cities on our itinerary to the location of the prison may or may not work out for me to personally officiate your Prison Wedding. However, if I can’t, Leigh Ann or Tammy can. I’m moving my bookings to predominantly Texas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Louisiana and Missouri as the majority of my bookings are in Texas. 

Because of the burgeoning schedules of Cindy and I, my son and his wife are also coming on board to address Oklahoma and Arkansas bookings as well as county jail requests in Texas. 

I’m going to go over stacking because it’s essential if you are stacked at a Unit that you are on time. Tuesday, I have two clients at Michael and two at Coffield. These two Units are within 7-9 minutes of one another. Because of this, I frequently move from Michael to Coffield or Coffield to Michael. 

However, if you are running late on wedding day, other clients at the same Unit or the Unit I’m moving to are going to be inconvenienced due to your tardiness. Please be considerate of other clients and arrive at least 15 minutes prior to your scheduled wedding time.

UPDATE ON MICHAEL UNIT CLOTHING- Dresses are now allowed but you cannot wear solid white. Why? Inmates wear white. Please incorporate color or patterns to white. Please keep hemlines not shorter than 2 inches above the knee. Please wear a cami of your dress reveals any cleavage. Please wear a slip if your clothing is sheer.

I’m off to shop venues, meet clients and looking forward to meeting all of our new clients soon at your Prison Weddings and especially excited to see our former clients at your Vow Renewal Ceremonies with Cindy and our Team in the coming months.

As always, we appreciate your trust and your loyalty. We are thankful for the opportunity to meet amazing people from all walks of life and to have the ability to finally spend time together that my career in sales as well as Cindy’s career took from us both for over twenty years. Texas Twins Events gave us the opportunity to give the gift of Dream Events one family at a time while subsequently giving us time to spend with each other. 

For all of the clients that the twins or Maddy jumping into your photos laughed with us, God Bless You. Our grandkids always thought a camera was meant for them. Maddy still does. 

When I look back over the hundreds of families and good times we’ve shared with ya all over the years on location for your bridal photos with my grandnieces hugging your leg or holding your bouquet, I’m reminded what amazing people you are. The love and kindness you’ve brought to Cindy and I as well as our children and grandchildren is a gift. Creating Texas Twins Events was a partnership. Cindy and I knew affordable options didn’t exist. Cindy was also taking on the responsibility of raising her twin grand daughters. Cindy had given up her income as a salesperson to raise her grandchildren. My twin sister is selfless. She is hilarious and she’s never met a stranger. She is also my best friend. Texas Twins Events gave us the opportunity to load up our kids and grandkids and go off to meet wonderful people who wanted a Dream Event. Amazing people who welcomed not only my Team but our entire family. People who became far more than clients. People who became the fabric of our lives. We love ya all… 

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I’ve Got A DANCE That AIN’T Got No STEPS…Work, Family, Clients & Reality…

This morning at 5AM, I was as usual up and at it. My day would have me driving across Texas meeting clients and someone who had contacted me regarding giving up her unborn child to Burt and Deanna who lost their baby girl to Trisomy a year ago. 

Getting my husband breakfast while he watched the weather (as usual) hoping rain would miss his Saginaw development, we had a few minutes to catch up with each other since the past five days have been spent tagging in and out to visit my grandniece at Cook’s Children’s Hospital. 

My husband has been a builder and developer for 50 years. Nothing sets back a development like rain. Saturday’s downpour was yet another setback to Matthew. He’s bracing for yet another one late today. Bless his heart. 

After walking Foxy Wortham, I ran to bathe and chose a Donna Karan suit to wear today while fielding texts, phone calls and emails. Last night while following the ambulance from Cook’s to Mesa Springs with Cindy riding shotgun, I took a call from my Coffield Unit client who was having trouble getting a certified copy of her marriage license from Tarrant County. 

This morning, I drove to the Tarrant County Clerks Office and picked it up for her while leaving Fort Worth. For those unaware of why you need a certified copy of your marriage license or what it is, I will elaborate. A certified copy doesn’t look like your original license. It’s a copy used for legal purposes. Once your license is signed and returned to the clerk, it’s recorded. After being recorded, its returned to you or if you’ve chosen to pick it up, waits for you. Most Units REQUIRE a certified copy be sent to inmate records to update an inmates status. The certified copy is relatively inexpensive from $4-12 based on the county. You will send it to inmate records with the inmates name and number. Please include this information because it you don’t, inmate records can have difficulty if the name of the inmate happens to be common such as John Smith, Michael Moore, Etc. 

Driving through Waxahachie, I was planning to stop for gas on my way to meet the pregnant lady who had contacted me in Corsicana at the Collin Street Bakery while on my way to meet Elizabeth at Beto Unit before dropping off the certified marriage license from Tarrant County to Coffield Unit before heading to Hodge Unit to meet Jenny before going back to Dallas County North Tower to meet two clients and then rushing back to Fort Worth for visitation at Mesa Springs. As usual, my day was busy. Staying busy occupies my mind. 

Arriving in Corsicana, I sent a text to Barbara to make sure she was at the bakery. She was. I rolled into the parking lot to find her wearing a heavy cable knit sweater that covered her wrists. I checked my car for the temperature. Eighty nine degrees. This wasn’t looking good. She was frail. Her eyes were dialated. I knew she was using. This will shock my readers so, I will elaborate. My mother was an intravenous heroin user. At five years old, I found her in the bathroom overdosing with the needle still sticking out from between her toes. To this day, the sight of blood makes me nauseous. 

Leaving my SUV. I ask Barbara to lift her sleeves. She becomes defensive. “Roll up your sleeves. Take off your shoes and open your mouth.” Barbara has dirty hair and clothing that doesn’t fit along with an attitude. I don’t care. Burt and Deanna are good people. I will not let their loss of baby DeLilah be taken advantage of by an addict. Addiction makes me angry. A pregnant addict is even worse. Barbara needs to get help. I plan to discuss this. There’s a program in Tarrant County at JPS that will help her. Convincing her to get help will be difficult and most likely, confrontational. I jump in anyway and decide that if I don’t use this opportunity, I will regret it. I’m tired. My bones hurt. This past week has left me heartsick. Barbara being an addict only compounds my sadness. 

There are old track marks on Barbara’s arms and new ones between her toes. She’s pregnant enough to be showing. Her mouth is full of rotten teeth most likely from meth use. Barbara underestimated me. “You tell them I want $10k for my baby.” When I posted that Burt and Deanna were willing to take on the expense of raising a child, paying for one had never been mentioned. Where did Barbara come up with this idea? 

I look at her deeply sadenned that the child she carries has no say in her lifestyle. Any idiot can get pregnant. My mom did four times. My mom also put a price tag on all four of her children’s heads. How much? Fifty dollars each. I will never get over the amount. None of her children will. The “sale” was recorded by my grandfather. He wrote the check. He also spent our entire childhood reminding us that “no one wants you not even your own mother.” Yes, there was a reason he recorded my mother getting $200 to go get high. The reason was to hurt us over and over again about it. Cindy found the tape years ago and played it until it broke. I listened to it once. It was enough for me. Enough to find her in my 20’s and ask her why myself. The answer would haunt me. The amount still does. 

“Barbara, Burt and Deanna are looking for a child that needs a loving family. They aren’t planning to buy a baby. I’m protective of them. I’m here today to screen you. I’m here today to protect them from being disappointed. I’m sorry but you need to get your head on and put your child’s needs before your desires. I won’t give you money but I will feed you. I will also help you get help when you are ready to find it. Here’s my card. Call me when you decide to change your life.” I took her inside and bought her food she didn’t eat. Addicts rarely do. I packed it up for her and drove away wondering if she would call me? 

Back on the road passing Russell Stover, I thought of the many times Cindy and I had stopped in for a caramel apple. Happy times after meeting happy clients at Tennessee Colony Units for their wedding. I will have to call Deanna and advise her of Barbara and the issues that I had hoped weren’t what I feared. It would be a let down to someone who will never get over losing DeLilah. Reality would be another thorn in Deanna’s heart. The world is often an unhappy place. Many people lose their faith because their path is so painful. I’ve been one of those people. Cindy has too. It’s difficult to understand why God gave us such a hard life now and then. Incomprehensible at times even but, God will find a way to help a mother while gifting Deanna and Burt with a child to love. I have faith. My faith was restored years ago. I lost it in my childhood and again in my first marriage. It’s difficult to “pin down” the many times I’ve wondered why life must be so hard? I’m certain others feel the same way. Barbara came from a good home. She had even gone to college and yet, she chose to become an addict. I don’t get it. Even as a child, I questioned why drugs were so important to my mother. 

My former Beto Bride Client is facing 20-25 years for bank fraud. She has a one year old son and no family. She’s also a good person who has no history of drug abuse. She contacted me two weeks ago fearful for her son’s future in foster care. She also is doing the right thing by giving up the son she loves so much to a family that will love him equally. While Burt and Deanna were more than willing to take on two children, the child carried by Barbara is a drug baby who will almost certainly have health issues do to the abuse of Barbara during her pregnancy. I offered to leave a bus ticket for Barbara on Will Call in Corsicana. I doubt she will use it. But maybe she will put her child’s needs first? I can only plant a seed. I can’t force Barbara to change. No one can. I’m certain her family gave up years ago and fear she may be prostituting herself in exchange for drugs. I had asked. Her face answered. 

I don’t “look like someone” aware of the underworld of drugs. I had to learn it from my mother who was a prostitute in exchange for heroin. I wish I didn’t know the seedy underworld of drug abuse or crack houses but, my niece was also a meth addict. The things people don’t know about me are that I never expected to live this long. Because of this, I’m also unafraid. 

I’ve been in places that would shock you. I’ve marched into dangerous areas to drag my niece out. My sister has too. Our anger prevented us from being afraid. We were determined to “straighten Stephaney up” and the people “pulling her back in” didn’t scare either of us. Instead, they infuriated us both. Twins marching in to crack houses to save Stephaney surprised the dealers but, when you are trying to save a family member, your own safety is set aside in your mission. Ours was. 

Luckily, our anger at my niece’s consistent relapses is (most likely) why we were never shot, stabbed or robbed. A Fort Worth Police officer once told me “she chooses to be here. You are going to get yourselves killed and I’m going to have to write up the paperwork. Get out of this area.” I told him “we know this area because we’ve been coming here for YEARS to save my niece and the dealers are far more afraid of us than we are of them. If we die trying to get her help, we died trying to do everything within our power to prevent my niece from becoming my mom.” He drove off. 

Heading to Tennessee Colony, I returned calls to Luther, Wynn, Hodge and Allred Units. I also cried about people like my mom and Barbara. I don’t understand it. I can’t. I check in with Cindy and Leigh Ann on Makenna. I make a note to pick up shampoo and conditioner for Makenna to take to visitation at Mesa Springs. It’s a very expensive facility. We don’t care. Mesa Springs is also the best facility in Fort Worth. Treatment for mentally ill patients AND addicts is expensive. 

For sixteen and nearly seventeen years, Cindy and I took turns paying for Stephaney’s treatment for drug abuse. Tens of thousands of dollars later, telling her “we were out. We were cutting her loose and we would never help her again” was actually what worked. Cindy and I were enablers. FOR YEARS. We were also, unaware of being enablers. 

I “line up my family for visits everyday” for Makenna while juggling client calls after calling Deanna about Barbara. I also take a call from New York regarding a “show idea.” I end the call by saying “call back after wedding season.” I mean it. I’m overwhelmed. I’m on auto pilot. Frankly, I’m like a horse with blinders the past week. I focus solely on getting everything I need to do done. I’m driven. But, I cannot take on anything outside clients and family right now. I know my limitations. A few months ago while trying to get Stephaney into a “luxury rehab facility in Valdosta,” a producer would waste over a week of my time in his efforts to obtain my clients contact information. He would lie. He would blow smoke and he would also have no idea what was going on in my life and why his “song and dance of empty promises infuriated the shit out of Cindy and I.” From a fake contract to wanting us to secure talent FOR him at our expense, Chris had no idea of what our work and personal lives actually entail. He also had no idea that I would expose his tactics. Don’t call me blowing smoke. I don’t have the time or the energy for bullshit. 

On that “luxury rehab” situation, it was an abandoned trailer with no running water, electricity or food. Cindy and I wouldn’t know this UNTIL we had sent Stephaney there. UNTIL we had send money and until Stephaney told us what was going on. I involved the DA, Attorney General, County Sheriff and more to “get Stephaney back” while saving three children also starving in that abandoned trailer WHILE dealing with clients and the dipshit producer who wanted me to screen my clients FOR HIM. Now you know why I was so pissed off. If you are a producer or casting agent, know your job description and don’t call me to do your job for you. Don’t lie to me to get me to do your job for you either. I have a very low tolerance for liars. 

Driving to Corsicana, I practice deep breaths and being on today. I practice putting my sorrow away to celebrate joy with my clients. I prepare to dance without music. I’m good at it. I always have been. I no longer fabricate the family to others that I didn’t have in order to protect THEM. I stopped doing this at fifty years old. Why lie to PROTECT the people who FAILED to PROTECT my siblings and I? I’m raw. I’m real. I’m honest. This shocks others but, I’m also a survivor. A survivor of a violent childhood and sexual abuse that began at 6 years old and didn’t end until my twin sister and I ran away. We were 15. 

On my fiftieth birthday, I decided to stop pretending I came from a wonderful family. I also decided to stop wishing I had one. This was joint decision by Cindy and I. When we had our children we vowed to treat them the same way we had hoped to have been treated as children ourselves. We kept our promises. 

Maybe a few people found us to be overprotective but neither our children or our grandchildren have ever been beaten or sexually abused because Cindy and I were cautious and extremely careful about who they were allowed to have over to our homes and sleepovers at friends houses were so rare that we can count on one hand the number of times we allowed our children AND grandchildren to stay over at a friends house in 35 years. 

My niece, Stephaney has been in near death situations by her choices over the years. We couldn’t change this. We tried. Over and over and over again. Stephaney’s choices weren’t due to a violent childhood. She had two mothers. Both Cindy and I raised all of our children and grandchildren together but, addiction runs in our family. Cindy and I hate addiction. HATE IT. We pray Stephaney never relapses again. I’m not sure we could handle another setback with Stephaney. We’ve had far too many. 

Elizabeth calls me an hour prior to her scheduled ceremony at Beto Unit. Elizabeth has also asked that I don’t post photos. I agree not to. Client privacy is a courtesy to all of our clients. She looks beautiful in a royal blue dress with her hair down and the Unit photos of her and her husband are the best I’ve ever seen in Texas. Elizabeth is thrilled with her photos. 

We had passed a barbecue place on the way to a Unit and I decided to use it for her bridal photos. I liked the “country backdrop” and it was on my way back to Tennessee Colony to head on towards Hodge Unit. I enjoyed finally meeting Elizabeth and look forward to editing her photos. 

I’m back on the highway and in a hurry to get to Hodge then back to Fort Worth. Due to the delay at Beto, I’m moving my Dallas North Tower Unit to after visitation at Mesa Springs tonight. My clients understand. They are completely unlike traditional clients. Many have asked why I prefer county and prison services? The answer? The people. They are real. They care about my family they have the compassion that many folks lack. They know sorrow and hardship. They too are survivors…. 

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TDCJ Officiant Wendy Wortham Work, Travel, Transportation, Tantrums & Tiaras…

I sleep very little during wedding season. For years, my Team and I “caught a break” off season to address refurbishing trades from Pawning Planners Clients sold at Texas Twins Treasures. Inmate wedding services changed our “off season.” How so? We no longer have an off season and are booked year round. Prison weddings took the place of “off season” for the Texas Twins.

A few folks (including my competitors) wonder how on earth my first Prison wedding literally shifted our client base 300 percent?  

The answer my friends is NOT BY ADVERTISING. The answer is by exceeding clients expectations, earning their trust and gaining their loyalty. 

A few of our competitors are jealous of our success but, “you can’t profit from the harvest if you don’t plant the crops.” 

In April 2017, Misty emailed me regarding performing a Prison wedding at Sanders Estes Unit. I underwent the process to become an Approved Officiant in order to help Misty. 

I have never marketed myself or paid for advertising in the event industry. I HAVE NEVER NEEDED TO ADVERTISE PRISON OFFICIANT SERVICES either. 

Due to this new expansion of our services at Texas Twins Events, I didn’t anticipate the surge in new bookings because at the time, I was unaware that the market and subsequent demand for inmate weddings even existed. 

But, A few months after Misty’s wedding at Estes Unit in April 2017, I was with another client at Michael Unit in September 2017. 

In October 5, 2017, I was with three clients at Estes Unit. By October 7, 2017, I was with another client at Ferguson Unit. 

By December 28, 2017, I was at Darrington with a client who had originally been at Jester Unit and hired Jo Anne (a competitor) to officiate her ceremony.  

This same client told me “Jo Anne can’t officiate so she told me her sister would but the Warden won’t allow her to. I need someone to marry me.” She hired Jo Anne but now Jo Anne was telling the client her sister would officiate? What was going on with my competitors?

The Jester inmate was subsequently transferred to Darrington. I drove to Darrington and married the client who wanted a reliable Officiant after being run around by my competitor. As usual, I exceeded her expectations and provided prison wedding Officiant services. 
My goal and the main reason for starting Texas Twins Events was to help people. By helping Misty with a creative request for services, over the first year of performing inmate services, bookings continued to roll in. I didn’t need to advertise Prison Weddings. I leveled the playing field in an industry that prior to me was charging exhorbitant fees to consumers simply because they wanted to marry an inmate. While my competition was being greedy, dishonest and misleading, I was being honest, affordable and most importantly, reliable. 

Prior to prison weddings, I had been in the event business many years prior to expanding my business to include prison weddings and had never advertised our services and more importantly, didn’t need to long before offering inmate Officiant services. 

Frankly, at the time Misty contacted me to marry her, I was juggling 50-75 existing through Texas Twins Events as well as being an Officiant on staff at Bell Tower Chapel and addressing clients Bartering through my sister business, The Pawning Planners. 

I was also a consultant for GLG and under contract with my twin sister with production companies and filming numerous projects at the same time within the same window. 

I.E. I was busy but, if people needed help marrying an inmate, I was willing to find time to help them. Since prison weddings are scheduled Monday through Friday leaving my weekends free for traditional and existing bookings, I easily could take on more inmate weddings and did. 

Prison weddings were a “perfect fit” to my existing schedule and more importantly, didn’t interfere with existing client bookings on evenings and weekends. 

Although I wasn’t “marketing inmate Officiant services,” word of mouth expanded my inmate Officiant business over and over from April 2017 to now. In fact, we now cover several states. 

Jo Anne (a competitor) had began trolling my sites since 2017 and following me. Although Jo Anne had been performing prison weddings for two years longer than I have and should have built her reputation, she had disappointed the previous clients who subsequently hired me instead. 

Over two years and running now, Jo Anne also recognized and realized that she was  losing her clients to me. I didn’t steal her clients. Her clients like everyone else found me. If you lose a client to a competitor, you lost them based on your own behavior. 

With the Darrington and Stiles clients, Jo Anne couldn’t perform their weddings due to being rescinded. I called her about “this issue” myself since her previous clients continued to find and more importantly, hire me. 

Throughout this two year window, more and more clients would book with me although again it should be noted that I never advertised to generate new clients. 

Clients found me because they had heard about me or because the other Officiant they had hired let them down. Unlike my competitors, I didn’t let anyone down. I treat each and every client like the star they are. 

One sunny afternoon while I was on site with a client at Belltower Chapel & Garden,  another call (and previous client of Jo Anne) came in regarding a wedding at Stiles Unit from yet another person who had hired Jo Anne and was unhappy. “She doesn’t answer her phone and when she does, I can’t get any information. “I hired her but I’ve heard about you. Will you help me?” 

Stiles Unit is an all day drive to and  from my location in Fort Worth. However, after speaking with this young lady, I committed to marrying her myself. 

I also advised this young lady to call the Courts in Huntsville to verify whether Jo Anne was approved. The new to me client called me back to tell me “Jo Anne wasn’t Approved.” 

Due to this shocking information regarding my competitor, I called Huntsville myself. My client was right. I quickly posted the contact information to the Courts in Huntsville on my FB business and personal sites in order to warn ANYONE planning to marry an inmate in Texas to verify Officiant credentials with the Courts PRIOR to retaining an Officiant. 

Immediately following my FB warning post, one of Jo Anne’s “clown posse” called the Courts in Huntsville to “file an erroneous and false complaint” against me regarding my simply stating the facts regarding  my warning to anyone considering hiring a TDCJ Officiant. 

Of course, a false and erroneous complaint from my competitor, Jo Anne and her posse regarding my honest statement had no impact whatsoever on my stellar reputation with the Courts in Huntsville. 

Heads up folks I’m nothing if not blatantly honest. I went into this business to help people. Jo Anne HAD BEEN IN THE PRISON WEDDING business for two years prior to me. Jo Anne has had every opportunity to be a success at this point. 

I wasn’t promoting myself or advertising to TDCJ bookings and I wouldn’t need to. Honesty and client satisfaction built my Prison wedding client base. 

Obviously, Jo Anne and her sidekicks false complaint regarding me warning consumers to call and verify credentials neither impacted or impeded my credentials in Huntsville. “We have other Officiants and I’m calling the Courts to file a complaint against your post regarding Jo Anne.” Sound familiar Jo Anne? 

You know, my post about people needing to know whoever they hired was QUALIFIED to perform the job they had been hired to do in the first place? If the truth bothered you, why didn’t you advise people retaining your services that you couldn’t perform their ceremony in the first place? If you hadn’t let your clients down and they hadn’t found me, I also wouldn’t have known there was an issue with your credentials either. Think about it. 

Our prison Officiant and planning business have literally boomed regardless of the sneaky tactics Jo Anne and her “clown posse” continue to pull. 

In February 2018, I was at Coffield Unit when a call came in from someone who needed an Officiant at Hodge Unit who had originally hired Jo Anne. These continued victims of my competitors continued to find me. I knew there was a problem because my new clients told me what they had been through dealing with my competition. Unlike my competitors though, I made their former clients day at a prison seemless, pleasant and memorable. 

In March 2018, I was at Hutchins Unit with another client when as usual my site was being consistently visited by Jo Anne. 

In March, I was also at Beto Unit when my website Team advised me that Splendora, Texas continued to hit my sites. I track every visitor to all of my sites. Jo Anne began paying for placement on google. 

Cindy and I flew to California to film This Time Next Year with Cat Deeley while also working destination events booked through Texas Twins Events. I.E. we were too busy to worry about Jo Anne. In fact, we always have been. 

We HAVE never been too busy to save clients who hired the wrong Officiant before coming to us. We MAKE time for people who need help. For Jo Anne’s former clients, we’ve made time again and again. 

In April 2018 I was back at Estes Unit before travelling to Stiles Unit on April 19, 2018 and marrying  the bride who needed my help AFTER hiring Jo Anne first.  

Since becoming a TDCJ Officiant April 2017, due to the number of clients coming to us for help, we have rebranded and expanded to address the growing need for inmate wedding services. I’ve been the second Officiant over and over because the first Officiants AKA my competitors have consistently let their former clients down. These “other Officiants” could have done the right thing and chose not to. They also lost their clients to me because they failed to provide services they had been paid to perform. 

A few days ago, Jo Anne drove traffic from her own page to my page by tagging me on FB.” While booking in these new clients, I asked “how did you hear about us? We have never advertised. So, can I ask who it was that referred you?” 

The shocking answer of my new clients and how they found me over the past few days was ironically not from previous client referrals but instead from my competitor? Jo Anne. 

While Jo Anne was busy talking about me on FB as well as tagging me, she was also inadvertently promoting me. Amazing isn’t it? 

New bookings that had never even heard of TDCJ Officiant, Texas Twins Events or Wendy Wortham until my competitors couldn’t stop talking about me? Finding me due to posts from my competition about me? Increased traffic that crashed my site due to my competitors? 

Ironically, because life is ironic, my site crash and subsequent “new Prison bookings” wouldn’t have happened this week without “help” from my competitor, Jo Anne. 

In March of 2018, I decided to buy a trademark for Texas Prison Weddings. By September 2018, I realized that I had hired the wrong attorney to do so. I was never interested in limiting myself to Texas in the first place. 

I decided to abandon my March 2018 trademark filing and focus on clients in several states instead. Texas Twins Events is national so why limit ourselves? 
Since all of our services including prison wedding services are available in several states, I knowingly and willingly abandoned the trademark for Texas Prison Weddings. My competitor subsequently picked it up. 

The trademark was approved for Jo Anne a just a few days ago, my competitor aka Jo Anne cannot stop talking about me or stalking me. But, everyone is listening including prospective new bookings. While Jo Anne is busy talking I’m busy working. I don’t care about that trademark and gave it up knowingly, willingly and intentionally. 

Trademarks don’t earn you business. Only you can do that. Limiting myself and my staff to Texas? NEVER. We travel baby. 

The inept trademark attorney I had hired to file the trademark was a blessing in disguise. How so? The name would have “put me in a box of only performing prison weddings in Texas” but, fate and my ability to overcome obstacles along with a dash of divine intervention and entrepreneurship are why and how I didn’t care about a trademark or a name that would have effectively limited our audience and subsequently, our services to Texas. 

I effectively threw that “geographically limiting” Prison trademark idea straight into the trash instead. 

Prison weddings occur even in other countries, I love to travel and I love to meet new friends. Worldwide prison weddings? Count me and my Texas Twins Events Team in. We will see ya all at the prison! 

Our services are available to many states and our success has a few folks shaking their fists but, our success comes entirely from happy clients, referrals and stellar work ethics. Loyalty is earned. 

My competitors, spies and internet trolls should take a page from my playbook and treat each and every client with the same degree of attention that we do but, common sense is like breath spray. The people who need it the most refuse to use it and get up in your face anyway. Jo Anne’s hometown friend attempting to discredit me with an erroneous complaint regarding my honest FB post and subsequent warning  “advising anyone hiring a TDCJ Officiant to first verify their credentials with Huntsville” was surprising to say the least but the “clown posse” and their antics have continued and even accelerated the past few days. Who cares? I’m working with the clients my competition COULD HAVE HAD if they had bothered to perform the task they had initially been retained to provide. 

“Trust, Honor, & Integrity are the building blocks of success. “Your CHARACTER says a LOT about YOU, even IF you aren’t LISTENING, everybody ELSE is.”

Jo Anne followed up her FB tagging Wednesday morning with more trash talking of while I was with a traditional client in a meeting and preparing to drive to Ferguson Unit immediately afterwards.

While still with my client, a negative review  notification from someone who “just happened to be friends with my competitor, Jo Anne AND even lived in the SAME town (Splendora) as Jo Anne aka the “competitor.” The notification came through to my cell phone. 

Jo Anne and her friend “aka the derogatory reviewer” who’s never retained my services  or even spoke to me (although she said that I was rude in her review) both live in Splendora, Texas. Now Jo Anne and the clown posse were making up fake reviews. 

This “reviewer” who had never hired me or my staff or at the very least even had ANY degree of contact with Texas Twins Events OR TDCJ Officiant whatsoever apparently thought that “leaving a derogatory review for a business you’ve never had any connection to was acceptable behavior.” It isn’t. 

The first Splendora, Texas derogatory and defamatory review would later be followed up by a former client of Jo Anne’s. 

Jo Anne and her posse were too busy laughing with themselves to recognize that “tracking the common denominator of these fake reviews was being conducted” while I was driving to Ferguson Unit. 

The common denominator? Jo Anne and her FB post tagging me. Stirring the chili and getting her friends fired up to unjustly attempt to sully my name. 

Here’s a tip ladies, I keep records of every phone call. Every email. Every text message. Every visitor to ANY Wendy Wortham site and I had NEVER had any INTERACTION with EITHER OF YOU. 

Also, phony reviewers, you were both “late to the party” attempting to hide your friends list connecting you both to Jo Anne. 

The first derogatory and unscrupulous “review” was posted to my page “Prison Weddings With Wendy Wortham” was within an hour of Jo Anne tagging me on FB regarding that trademark I had let go months ago. 

Jo Anne just can’t help herself. She trolls my social media, visits my sites several times a day and even subscribes to all of my blogs. Jo Anne is obsessed with me, my twin and my staff as well as her previous clients smiling at photo shoots after we marry them. On one occasion, Jo Anne even called her former client from Hodge Unit after seeing that I had married her. WTF? 

Jo Anne is literally obsessed with me AND her former clients. But, unlike most crazy stalkers, this competitor and her “friends” weren’t going to ruin my day with their preposterous antics. 

Fake reviews from her own connections? The childishness never ends but, makes it obvious that my stalking competitor has far too much time on her hands. 

Before arriving at Ferguson Unit, one of Jo Anne’s former clients left ANOTHER derogatory review. This type of rampant stupidity is why 24 hours later, my site would crash due to heavy traffic. All because my crazy stalker wanted to draw attention to me? Yes. 

Who needs a publicist or marketing person when your stalker aka competitor Jo Anne cannot stop talking about you and subsequently directing traffic and new bookings to you. 

Hell, Jo Anne, if you keep talking about me, I’m going to be forced to hire more personnel. 

By tagging me on FB and effectively, redirecting YOUR own traffic directly to my services, aka Jo Anne had increased my bookings from 1-3 clients this past week to 12.  

Due to this “redirected traffic,” from FB tagging and trash talking of Jo Anne and her two cronies, my site crashed with an overflow of new business inquiries and bookings between 05-15-2019 to 05-17-2019. 

Had my Jo Anne NOT HAVE TAGGED ME, my newly booked clients might not have even found me on FB. After all, they were on her page FIRST.

I was at the Tarrant County clerks office Friday at 2PM helping my client, Payton get her marriage license and completely unaware of website issues when a call from a Le Blanc prospect that I had spoke with on Tuesday while driving back from San Saba Unit came in. 

Thankfully, my client was thrilled to get her license and can’t wait to get married Sunday. 

Since visitation is on certain days, Payton took the online Twogether In Texas course to waive her waiting period. 

My Le Blanc client had also attempted to follow up and contact me through TDCJOfficiant.com regarding planning her Prison wedding Wednesday while I was at Ferguson Unit. When she didn’t get an answer, she called me “I emailed you a few days ago and haven’t heard back from you.” 

Alarmed, I called my site manager to find out what was going on and resolve the issue. I would spend all night Friday contacting everyone that had attempted to use the contact us link at the same time. 

I’m really looking forward to meeting my latest bookings and especially my Le Blanc client who saved the day for me by giving me a heads up. 

Jo Anne has to have paid placement on google. She “has to” because I don’t need to and continue to outbook her over and over. 

My creative content and quality websites put me at top placement in google search engines. I’m there for free and have been all along. Paid placement? No thank you. 

My twin sister and I have filmed a television pilot based on our business, The Pawning Planners, we have signed with seven production companies regarding show concepts about our businesses and we are currently negotiating with other production companies and networks as well as writing a book and continuing to rebrand and expand. 

While juggling our numerous responsibilities, inmate wedding services have continued to grow beyond any expectation I could have anticipated. We now service inmate weddings in several states. 

Had my site not crashed due to this “redirected traffic” from Jo Anne, the timeline of the “site occurrence” wouldn’t be so “easy to pinpoint.” But, it was. My web designer tracks visitors and urls. The moment my competitor tagged me, my site traffic increased. Boomerang clients? You bet. What goes around comes around. 

I will (as usual) give these new clients the care and courtesy they should have gotten from my competitor who was far too focused on attempting to tarnish my reputation to realize what she was doing. 

Truth is always stranger than fiction. My reputation is why I’m successful. So successful that I’ve added TDCJ Officiants and expanded into other states. 

Client loyalty is a priceless commodity in business. Earn it and you won’t have time to stalk me Jo Anne. Stop trying to figure out why I’m successful and start trying to figure out how to be successful instead. I know, it’s a totally new concept but, try it. Stop stalking me and start focusing on you.

For those unaware of how I got started in the Prison wedding business, it’s actually an interesting story. A creative request to officiate a prison wedding a few years ago and my willingness to undergo the process to help a stranger literally changed the dynamics of our bookings. True story. 

I have never once even considered advertising because at the time I agreed to become a TDCJ Officiant, I already had commitments to my existing clients on the books from Texas Twins Events and The Pawning Planners. My evenings and weekends were booked out nearly two years and I didn’t see how I could possibly squeeze new clients into my schedule. 

I had expected my first prison wedding to be my last request for an inmate wedding because I didn’t realize there were other people who just like Misty needed a TDCJ Officiant. I wasn’t planning to rebrand and expand again. But, due to the demand,  it happened. Texas Twins Events expanded and rebranded a second time in five years to include inmate weddings.

Inmate weddings actually opened a new door and took us into a completely new direction. An adventure of rebranding and expanding with new business bookings based entirely on my first happy Prison Wedding client, Misty at Estes Unit. 

I helped Misty with her prison wedding and by doing so, I was gifted with new opportunities and a new direction. 

For those unaware, I merged Texas Twins Events and Texas Twins Treasures to create a barter option aka The Pawning Planners in 2014. As usual, Cindy and I were pioneers. No one in the events industry had ever considered bartering. We did it first. We have never been afraid to invest in ourselves or finding solutions for others. We are entrepreneurs. 

While our competitors in the events industry laughed at the Texas Twins and the idea of bartering event services, we flew to Hollywood and filmed a sizzle reel. Laughter is the best medicine other event vendors who also troll our sites. 

While our competitors stalked us, we filmed a television pilot. While others expected us to fail, we continued to expand and rebrand. WITHOUT EVER ADVERTISING! The need existed to find a way to fund Dream Events and my twin and I found a solution. The need also existed for honesty and transparency in the Prison Wedding business and again, we grew to address the requests. 

As usual, the moment other event vendors who used to laugh at our idea to create a People Over Profit based event business only to later offer a barter option, no longer laugh. We help ANY income level. 

These same vendors who thought “Prison Weddings were controversial” also thought (years ago) that being openly LBGT friendly would destroy their business are now (so they say) LBGT friendly. Better late than never ya all. 

As other event vendors hid their affiliation with LBGT clients years ago, my Texas Twins Events Team welcomed anyone from any background. Yes, we are different. We are fearless and undaunted by haters who cannot understand why our unconventional business methods are far more effective. 

How our businesses that have never advertised or paid for promotion have continued to succeeded, grow and thrive surprises everyone. Our clients are our priority. Their loyalty is why year after year we continue to grow. Surprised? Don’t be. Referrals are priceless. 

Building a client base requires YOUR dedication. Welcoming ANY client? ANY request? We have and our dedication and resilience within the events industry is a story all of its own. 

From weddings to purple unions to estate liquidation to flipping trades to prison weddings, birthday parties and baptisms, my family and I didn’t care about the people laughing. We cared about the people coming to us for help. We focused on our clients. 

We took the risks no other event vendor was willing to and we would do it all over again. We have continued to grow because our clients are family to us. They are a fabric in our lives. Our relationship doesn’t end after an event. Quite the contrary, our relationships are friendships with our former clients. 

Inmate weddings take place during the week and therefore wouldn’t interfere with existing bookings on the weekends making adding prison weddings to our services the “perfect fit.”

Since I began offering inmate wedding services, we have continued to grow based entirely on our reputation and client referrals. There is no need for me to advertise nor has there ever been. 
Cindy and I think differently than our competitors. We have never “fit a mold” and we have always educated ourselves about any aspect of any product that we have ever sold. Product knowledge is essential in ANY industry. 

My sister and I are both survivors. We left home at 15 and made our own way in life. We didn’t have friends or even family to help us. The reason we started Texas Twins Events years ago was because we didn’t have anyone to help us with our own weddings. Why not? Our mother was a heroin addict who abandoned us as children. We came from a broken family and had no friends or family to help us plan our own weddings. We started our business based on our own experiences. True story. We wanted to give people the weddings we didn’t have ourselves. 

What we DID HAVE was the tenancity to succeed. We are passionate and resilient. We are dedicated and determined. For our competitors, we are also a force to be reckoned with. Client loyalty has expanded our business year after year after year. 

For those wondering how we got here, a little background…. At 18, I was a commercial actress with Mel Tillis doing Whataburger commercials. 

When I needed nice clothing, I became a model to create a fabulous wardrobe and go into high end sales. To sell, you need to look successful and I did. To sell, you need to earn a clients trust and I did. My twin and I had no one to fall back on. We only had each other and we are the most honest salespeople you will ever meet. If we wouldn’t buy it, we didn’t sell it. 

People buy from us because they trust us and we don’t ever let them down. Cindy and I have never been afraid to roll up our sleeves or get our hands dirty either. 

The Pawning Planners (Texas Twins) can put up fences or strip, stain and reupholster trades and more. This twin team knows the value of hard and honest work. We have helped people that no one else was willing to help on more than one occasion. For YEARS. 

The broken fence (below) was a request for help from someone who had no money or barter but, needed our help. We jumped in and rented a truck to pick up free panels and poles to help someone we had never met? Yes, we most certainly did. 

You’ve never met anyone like us because we care about others. We are passionate and perseverant. Finding someone to donate panels and poles? Sure on Craigslist. 

The person contacting us for help with a broken fence didn’t have a truck. We went to Home Depot and rented one. 

The fence person came to us “because she heard we help people.” We do. Occasionally, we give insight to people in order for them to help themselves too. Cindy and I are entrepreneurs who became successful because failure was never an option. 

What made Cindy and I “different” made us sought after. We are the people we would like to meet. 

“You cannot buy a referral OR a happy client. You earn their business by dedication and exceeding their expectations. 

Throughout my life, only once have I needed to advertise and it was within an industry I had no prior experience with. What was it? Luxury car sales. I can sell anything. 

During a divorce, I needed a car and upon realizing that luxury car sales offered free demos, took a job at Cadillac. In order to gain my own client base in a wholly new career path, I used my previous experience as a former print and commercial model to run my own ads in Country clubs across Texas. This “type of advertising” had never been done before in the car sales industry but, I’m a pioneer and my creative advertising campaign paid off for me as a Cadillac salesperson. 

Direct marketing specifically to consumers that could afford to buy luxury cars was the most successful investment I had ever made at that time in my life. Even I was shocked at the success of my unique idea to market myself. I generated clients booking by appointment and I had more clients than I could handle. 

While other salesmen laughed at marketing campaign, they didn’t laugh long. Clients generated through my creative marketing campaign referred their friends and family to me. 

Within a four year window, I was awarded again and again for customer satisfaction and excellence. I retired from Cadillac “on top.” 

My reputation sold all of those vehicles. I earned the trust of my clients and their loyalty. 

After two years, I no longer needed to pay to advertise. I had more business than I could handle because I was willing to be different. To do something different. To invest in myself and stellar work ethics. I knew if I could bring clients in, I would sell and sell I did. 

I don’t fit in a box. Clients I had previously sold Cadillac’s to booked again. This time for event services. 

Former Cadillac clients book new services and ALL of our clients for Texas Twins Events, Texas Twins Treasures, The Pawning Planners and Prison Weddings ARE REFERRED CLIENTS. 

Dedication and dilligence are how we have grown year after year. Happy clients continue to refer their friends and family to us again and again. We build relationships not sales numbers. 

You can’t afford to buy loyalty or referrals. No one can. Loyalty and subsequently, referral business is earned only through building trust with a client.” 

Cindy and I stay busy with interviews. After all, there isn’t a business as versatile as ours anywhere. We especially enjoyed a radio interview together Thursday afternoon regarding people over fifty starting their own business. 

The most important aspect of any business is to expect a learning curve. I didn’t expect to rebrand and expand in order to address low income clients but the need existed and The Pawning Planners was born. I didn’t expect to rebrand and expand again to address inmate wedding services either but, a creative request for an inmate wedding is why and how Texas Twins Events rebranded and expanded again. I’m open minded. 

From rich to poor, our clients are the biggest mix of people from any background you could imagine. But, by rebranding and expanding, our services became available to any income level for any service. 

I’ve been in sales my entire life and the key to sales is building quality in the product and establishing a relationship with the client. Unlike my competitors, I have. 

Although we are based in Texas, Texas Twins Events has offered destination event services from the inception. We’ve never been limited to Texas. We have no plans to start now either. The Texas Twins Travel! 

I’m not ONLY familiar with competing businesses because at WorthamWorld, I am also familiar with competing neighbors.

Friday morning, I was kicking off my morning at 5AM, and I was surprised to see Maria (the maid next door) walking towards Foxy and I. After all, I’m trying to walk my dog in silk pajamas unnoticed. I had a long day ahead of me and wasn’t planning to deal with my entitled neighbor or her brow beaten housekeeper, Maria. 

Ninety nine percent of my neighbors don’t work. There’s a lot of “old money” in Westover Hills, TX. From old mansions to exotic cars and a 90 year old grocery store that sells items 50% or more above “traditional” grocery stores, watching maids walk from the bus to work every morning is a regular occurrence. 

I like Roy Pope Grocery and I realize convenience is expensive so, I enjoy walking to the market with a parking lot full of Maserati’s, Porsche, Mercedes and Rolls Royce vehicles. These folks could walk too but they prefer to drive and leave their cars running. 

If you were a car thief, my neighborhood is the neighborhood to “score” at. Occasionally, I will drive my Santa Fe SUV or my Nissan Rogue over to Roy Pope if I’m returning from a booking. 

My “flawless neighbors” in full makeup and fancy cars give me the stink eye though for a number of reasons but mainly because I work and they don’t. 

Also, watching film crews and clients come and go at WorthamWorld raises a few eyebrows around here. My neighbors are far from liberal or open minded. 

I occasionally pity my neighbors the same way I laugh back at my competitors who once laughed at me. The “affluent housewives” looking down on others would certainly have a fairly tough time surviving on their own should their their husband’s ever leave. I’ve seen it happen. I will see it happen again. 

I’ve never looked down my nose at anyone because I’m old and I’m wise and I happily say hello to my “Beverly Hills Wannabe” neighbors on a regular basis. 

Apparently though, my snootiest neighbor had seen me leave my driveway with Foxy  Friday morning and had sent Maria over to ask me “have you called the city about mowing the estate next door to you?” 

I (momentarily) considered marching over to my neighbors house and getting snappy but poor Maria was just a messenger. Her mistress (most likely) would take out her frustration on Maria if I had. 

A few times over the years, I’ve driven Maria home. Maria is hard working and supports her family. Maria is too good for her mistress who “likes to keep up appearances” in Westover Hills with perfect makeup and clothing to go check her mail or drive to the Country Club. She’s an Instagram neighbor. Her life on social media looks envious but, reality isn’t social media ya all. 

Insta life and real life are far from the same. My neighbor is most likely depressed and struggling with alcoholism. I remind myself daily to pity her rather than resent her but, her treatment of Maria bothers me to no an end. 

If I ever cave in and allow my husband to hire a maid, I’m going to save Maria from being under the thumb of my neighbor. The house next door to me upsets everyone in my neighborhood. But not to the point of them taking any action other than telling my husband or I to “do something about it.” They all have lawn men and could easily send their workers over but, have never done so. Instead, they complain to us to “do something.” 

A few of my “entitled neighbors” have all day to call the city but in my neighborhood,  it’s regularly expected that my husband and I do it for them. “Your husband is a developer. He knows everybody downtown. Surely he has a few minutes to take care of this for the betterment of the neighborhood Wendy.”

The rambling eyesore next door to my home bothers me to such an extent that I’ve hired yard men for years to clean it up. I’m currently on strike though as the neighbor on the other side of it has decided to pay yard men to “cut only four feet into the abandoned estate because you hire people to handle that yard.” Humph. This statement lit me up. 

Six years of paying yard men to clean up someone else’s property and the attitude of all of my neighbors expecting me to continue to pay for the upkeep are what actually led to my strike. Mowing four feet of that yard is ridiculous. When I pay yard men to clean up that estate, I don’t tell them to “just do my side and leave the other side.” 

My husband is equally sick and tired of maintaining the adjoining property with no benefit whatsoever as well as running construction on his numerous developments and dealing with the city regarding the abandoned estate next door is the last thing he wants to do although it happens to be “related to our neighborhood as opposed to his development neighborhoods.” 

My husband and I are on strike about paying to upkeep a property solely because we are forced to look at it next door. What’s wrong with that neighbor? He could sell the lot within days for easily $500k but chooses to let raccoons move in and trees to overtake the property. I don’t get it. 

I told Maria I would call the city on my way downtown and report the three home decaying estate next door to the city again rather than telling her what I REALLY thought about her boss while my haughty neighbor looked on at both of us. 

Poor Maria rides the bus every morning then walks to my neighbors estate. I see her as I’m walking Foxy. I’ve always felt sorry for her. 

Once she arrives at work, her mistress makes her change into a maids uniform. It’s belittling to her. I know she hates wearing it as much as I hate seeing her wear it. 

A few of my neighbors would benefit from manual labor and a good days work. The neighbor Maria works for is one of them. 

Often I think a few of these neighbors must be so far upside down in debt that I nearly expect to see the repo man coming over to pick up their fancy cars but, it hasn’t happened yet. 

Driving exotic cars is something that you will never see me do. We pay cash for new suvs every two years and don’t owe on credit cards or anything else. My husband and I aren’t flashy and we like it that way. 

Rich people get on my nerves but more than that, housewives who run around in tennis outfits ALL DAY while driving $400k vehicles and acting superior to anyone who isn’t driving a fabulous car REALLY GET ON MY NERVES. 

Entitled neighbors aside, I (as usual) had a jam packed weekend of client meetings and events. As my nosy neighbors watch our three suvs and a four wheel drive truck pull out of my driveway at 6:30AM after going over the weekend schedule for my Texas Twins Events Team schedule this morning, I ignored my nosy neighbor rather than giving her the finger. It’s not easy. Her opinion of our clients lights me up. 

Poor Maria is working for a tyrant over there. The fact that my idiot neighbor forces Maria to wear a starched maids outfit to identify her position at that estate infuriates me. 

But, I can’t save Maria. Her position in life bothers me though. One day, I hope Maria does give her mistress the finger one day and finds someone else to work for that treats her with respect.  

Someone needs to “knock that invisible tiara” off my “full of herself neighbors head” but, it won’t be me because I don’t have the time and more importantly, I live here. 

Last weekend my always “determined to impress others neighbor” hired valets who blocked all of our driveways for her party. I was forced to go over there and advise her that three of us couldn’t get out of our driveways. Her response? “Well, go find Maria to tell the valets as you can see I’m entertaining.” Ugh. Poor Maria. 

Rich people are often the worst clients I’ve ever had. They want everything and bitch about paying for it. Although my husband and I live well, we have always treated others with respect and kindness regardless of where they work or how they earn a living. In fact, neither of us have had to work in years now. We both enjoy our work but I enjoy it far more than Matthew. Why? Because building and development incurs new problems everyday. I don’t have his problems. I jump in my SUV and head off for good times with great people. Unless of course, they are rich people and then it isn’t always wine and roses. 

I prefer prison wedding clients. Why? Because my clients are friendly, excited and thankful that’s why. Rich people never are. I’ve limited my traditional bookings for years with affluent clients because of this fact. I turn down new booking requests on a regular basis from “affluent” clients. They are the most demanding people in the world to work with. 

When you don’t have to work to earn a living, you don’t put up with someone handing you an apron to serve food when they hired you to coordinate and officiate. Rich clients don’t want to pay for additional staff. They assume because you have a team that your team will volunteer. Wake up! I prefer to say no and move on to clients we ENJOY working with. 

Rich people think everyone is “day labor.” They assume you have nowhere to be and all day to get there. They also think they are your ONLY CLIENTS. 

I WILL ALWAYS prefer our low to middle class bookings because real people treat you like you would want to be treated. My arm has to be twisted to take on a “big event.” Big Events will always be a hassle. I never look forward to them. 

My haughty neighbor knows I perform prison weddings and LBGT events and “doesn’t approve of rainbow unions or prison weddings.” She actually stopped me one day to tell me about her opinion. I stopped myself from telling her to go F herself. It isn’t easy being me. 

I encounter stupidity from others (mainly my neighbors but occasionally, my competitors) who think their opinion matters to me on a regular basis.

This morning I’m starting my day at Green Bay Unit in Fort Worth. This is a massive detention center that I’m meeting clients at at least twice a week. If you haven’t heard of it, I will include more information and warn you that phone calls are $15 each. Do not assume that these calls are $5 each because they aren’t. 

Tarrant County TX – Green Bay Facility has a phone program where inmates make outbound calls only, you cannot call into jail. Since you are paying for those calls don’t make it a habit of accepting collect-calls, they are over $15 EACH. 

The alternative is to set up an account through their third-party phone company which charges steep fees for each minute used. You are paying for them to call you. 

The preposterous amount of money that Keller charges had one of my clients mothers calling me crying. $775 for ten phone calls? I couldn’t believe it myself. To rectify this issue, I helped Mariah and her mother draft a Letter Of Intent and report this flagrant financial abuse to the Consumer Protection Agency as well as the AG. Beware of collect phone calls ya all because it’s anyone’s guess as to what they will cost. 

The Tarrant County TX – Green Bay Facility is a County – medium detention center located at 2500 Urban Drive in Ft Worth, TX. This county jail is operated locally by the Tarrant County Sheriff’s Office and holds inmates awaiting trial or sentencing or both. 

Most of the sentenced inmates are here for less than two years. Tarrant County accepts inmates from surrounding towns, municipalities and the Ft Worth Police Department who do not have their own long-term lock-up.

There are new detainees delivered to the jail daily, the see arrest records here. Some are released after putting up bail, are released to a pretrial services caseload, are placed under supervision by a probation agency, or are released on their own recognizance with an agreement to appear in court. 

If there is no release, the inmate must wait here at the jail for their court appearance as a guest of the County, getting a bed and three square meals.

Trustees are inmates who work in the jail as cooks, as orderlies for the staff, in the laundry or in the commissary. The trustees are paid a very small amount for their time and some jail gives the trustees a few days off their sentence in exchange for their work.

When an inmate arrives in jail they are put together in a large holding cell with other inmates in the intake. While in intake they are under heightened observation. Violent and out of control inmates are segregated.

I was actually “following the groom” who had been transferred from Tarrant County Jail to Green Bay. Last week my client and I thought he was at Tarrant County but as usual, he was moved without being able to notify his fiancée. We found him again after a collect call. 

Not knowing where your loved one is continues to be upsetting to my clients. Luckily, my Green Bay client has an attorney I know well. I know most attorneys in Fort Worth and Dallas from my years spent in courtrooms as well as socially at fundraisers for Kay Granger and from Ridglea or Shady Oaks Country Club. 

Unlike my snobby neighbor who will spend her summer laying around the Country Club pool sipping martinis and trying to look sexy, I only go to “the club” for client meetings, social functions and the occasional lunch or dinner with my husband. 

I have no idea why my neighbor hasn’t died yet of alcohol poisoning with the ever present martini glass in her hand? I’ve never seen her without a drink regardless of what time it is. How do people function drinking 24/7? I don’t get it. 

Anyway luckily, I knew the attorney and called him to get me a notarized Absentee Affidavit for the inmate. I had a great call with him discussing both of our families and pitching him on getting married. For years now, I’ve asked when this attorney is going to get married? His internet date stories are hilarious though and if he were to finally meet someone and hire me to marry them, I’d really miss his hit and miss blind date sagas. 

Speaking of Tarrant County Jail, I will be back over there today to meet my Dallas County Jail client who was bumped to Tarrant County due to a warrant. Following the Groom is actually a regular occurrence. 

I’m at Rivercrest for a client meeting and lunch this afternoon and no I don’t like watercress sandwiches. My husband loves them and Rivercrest is famous for them. Yuck. 

My husband pretty much lived at Rivercrest Country Club most of his life. His father, grandfather and entire family were members of this stuffy old above 70 years old clique. 

Rivercrest isn’t the fun Country Club of Fort Worth. Both Rivercrest and Colonial are the “stuffy” clubs of Fort Worth. 

The fun folks are members of Ridglea and Shady Oaks or both. For people like me who hate golf, comparing the greens is totally lost on me. Every golf course looks the same. 

My husband could spend hours explaining the differences of the greens at Rivercrest, Colonial, Shady Oaks and Ridglea but the conversation would put me to sleep in seconds.

I’m considering cutting this Rivercrest client loose for more than ONE REASON. First, she calls constantly and when she isn’t calling, her mother is. Secondly, this wedding is at the club and eleven months from now. Nearly another year of constant phone calls? Hell, I need to bill by the call with this client AND her mother. 

It’s an ass whipping to deal with Inlaws and Outlaws in the planning process. This bride begged me to take this job and my husband “knows the family.” 

My husband and I constantly bicker the “valid points” he thinks there are regarding my consistent issues about taking on “affluent clients.” I prefer not to. 

My husband doesn’t know how difficult rich people are to work for in the event planning business but, I do. Cindy does. My husband thinks “working these larger events is a great way to expand.” 

My husband didn’t expect prison weddings to take off and even today cannot believe how successful this extension of services would be. 

A few affluent clients won’t take no for an answer after “telling their friends the Texas Twins are doing their event.” Heavy sigh. I wish they wouldn’t tell people they booked with us long before I’ve ever considered taking the booking. Now you feel pressured to commit. They realize this and then, you are under their thumb. Jeez. 

Today, I’m going to have to go over a few ground rules about these constant phone calls from “traditional clients.” Last night, my bride thought her ring wasn’t big enough. People don’t marry based on the size of the stone. I found this troubling phone call to be a “sign of things to come.” 

Occasionally, “people who have it all can never have enough.” I’ve had enough already and this wedding isn’t until next year. You get the point. I had a lengthy discussion about her finding fault with her ring, the napkins the venue the this and that and taking the time to call me to call so and so and tell them she’s unhappy. I advised her to use the phone and address the issue directly and remove calling me to call them from this circle of chaos or… start paying me by the call. I think I’ve got this covered now but, we will see. 

I’m going to once again go over the truth that guards are not professional photographers. PLEASE DO NOT FILE A COMPLAINT regarding UNIT PHOTOS. Guards are doing the best they can and often with less than professional quality equipment. 

Certain Units have the worst photos and we can’t change the outcome of a bad photo. What we can do is accept that it’s not going to be an amazing shot an move on. 

Hodge and Estes take amazing photos. Seriously. The lighting and everything is as close to perfect as you can get in a Prison.  Coffield is hit and miss. One day the photo might be okay and the next it’s hard to even identify myself in a Unit photo. 

But, these are the only photos we are going to have of the inmate so, let’s keep it light and lower our expectations of high quality photography at your unit wedding. 

I reviewed an interesting request yesterday while in the parking lot waiting on my Mercado Event Center client. “We are looking for a female officiant that is non-denominational with zero religious agenda. Although we are a man and a woman, our ideal officiant is someone that has performed same sex marriage ceremonies in the past or would be willing to in the future. For us that’s a screener right there.” 

The only thing I was uncertain about was being liberal. Was I? I’ve never thought about it. I’m open minded and always have been. I decided to ask my husband. I’ve never put a label on myself but, my husband was roaring with hilarity at my question. “Oh my gosh! You are the most liberal person I’ve ever met in my life. I have to play down how liberal and non judgmental you are on a daily basis to conservative people who begin a conversation with “I saw you wife on the news or such and such show. I heard your wife on the radio. Your wife goes to Prisons? Doesn’t she have enough clients to address? Your wife shouldn’t be working she doesn’t need to work. Tell her to go learn to play bridge at the club.” Wendy, the description of liberal should have your name in it. Lol. The definition is actually: open to new behavior or opinions and willing to discard traditional values.” Hmm. I guess I AM LIBERAL!

Go play play bridge at the Country Club? I would rather jump off a bridge. F that. 

I decided to go ahead and take on this new booking because I love curious and interesting propositions. They weren’t LBGT but were interested solely in someone who performs LBGT Weddings? What the? I’m interested. It’s difficult to surprise me but this guy did. 

Between Willow Lake Event Center, Villagio and Belltower client meetings yesterday, Cindy and I had two radio interviews. Both were fun but Cindy and I especially enjoyed Karen’s. Her story of meeting her husband on Match and not realizing until buying their marriage license he had lied about his age by 6 years was hilarious. Normally, women lie about their age but, the way she told that story was absolutely hilarious. We loved talking with Karen!

I’m meeting my Goree Unit bride this afternoon at the Tarrant County Clerk to hold her hand buying the marriage license. My Crain Unit Groom made the same request. Buying a license if you’ve never done it is scary for my clients. When I don’t have time to accompany those needing someone with them to buy the license, my staff does based on who is available. Don’t be scared. It’s just a process. 

No one in Tarrant or Dallas county is going to be rude or confrontational with you because you are marrying an inmate. You will be just fine. But, if you would feel better having someone with you, just let me know and I will make arrangements. 

I’ve had several inquiries for California Prison Weddings so I will elaborate on requirements. For the past year, I’ve stacked inmate weddings to work in travel expenses. It’s not an problem to stack inmate weddings. In fact, I regularly stack in Texas and Louisiana as well as California. Beginning August 1st though, Leigh Ann will be handling California inmate weddings and the need to stack will be removed. 

My son and his wife will continue to handle “Houston runs” to county jails in adjoining cities. 

Cindy is joining me as a TDCJ Officiant due to the number of requests. We will continue to travel as a team wherever we can because we love our road trips but, in an effort to help everyone, bringing Cindy on board to Officiate prison weddings is a necessity. My son is more comfortable at county jail Weddings as his wife. 

Hoping you have an amazing day and really looking forward to being back on site at Villagio… 

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If You DON’T Focus On YOUR Journey To SUCCESS You Will End Up WORKING For The Person Who Did…

For a few months now I’ve been pushing off a press release for an award I was presented. Why? I don’t have time to sit down for a one to two hour interview. My work takes precedence over anything else in my life with family running a close second. 

I’m frequently asked how I became so successful by others who readily realize that I have never advertised or needed to. The answer is by exceeding my clients expectations. If everyone else in the sales industry would put forth the effort with each and every client they too would see amazing results but, sadly we live in a world where sales are similar to taking a number. Once the number is taken, it’s thrown in the trash. 

Relationships outlast the initial sale. I don’t treat clients like sales. I treat them as individuals and make their needs my priority. I’m different because I actually care about my clients. 

My Beto client last week touched my heart. Her journey hasn’t been easy. Both of her parents were sentenced to prison when she was only one year old. She had also just given up her apartment and had her car towed a week prior to her scheduled wedding at Beto. Hearing this news days before the wedding and knowing she had a two year old son touched my heart. How could I find her help for a very stressful situation? I quickly went to my contacts at Womens Haven and Union Gospel Mission as well as deeply discounting my fee and even offering to drive her to Beto myself. 

At her photo shoot, I asked her “what her plans were for her and her son?” My bride had family in East Texas but, her son attended school in Forest Hill and my client didn’t want to pull him out of the school she had fought to get him into. Her son’s school took precedence over any decision she would make to find a new home and job to support herself and her young son. 

It’s not well known but, my twin sister and I were residents at Women’s Haven ourselves at fifteen years old. Homeless and alone, Cindy and I both lived at the center until we could get on our feet again. During my divorce, I worked 2-3 jobs to support myself and my son while paying his Ad Lidem attorney and my own attorney. Without my twin sister helping me by taking care of my son, I have no idea how I would’ve afforded childcare back then. 

I’m driven and determined because I’ve always had to be. I’m compassionate because I’ve learned that caring about others journey is rare but, I care far more than anyone realizes. 

Yesterday as I was driving back from Dallas North Tower and the county clerk, my Beto bride called me regarding filing the license. An issue she faced was that she no longer lived at the address she had given when purchasing her marriage license. If I filed the license for her, it would be mailed to the old address. I spent some time going over a few alternatives with my client that included going to the post office to put a hold on her mail at her old address as well as getting a P.O. Box or filing the license in person. 

If I file a wedding license, it’s mailed directly to the address given by the couple. If a client files the license in person, the license is recorded and handed back. I suggested this option to ensure the license wasn’t lost in the mail and put gas money in the envelope containing her wedding photos to be sure she wouldn’t run out of gas getting to Dallas. I hadn’t heard from her prior to running to Dallas myself yesterday morning and assumed she had filed the license herself last Friday. Otherwise, I would have driven her to Dallas myself to spare her the trip and the expense of gasoline. 

This morning as I prepare for a call from Kate, a journalist on my way to Tarrant County Detention Center, I wonder if my bride has been by my office to pick up her wedding photos and gas money? I wonder if she has found a place to stay or a job and I wonder how the burden of expenses involved to be a Prison wife will affect her life? I worry constantly about my clients. I can’t help myself.

There’s a stack of mail in my office awaiting my attention. There’s also a five page questionnaire for Power Woman Of 2019 awaiting my attention. I have 172 emails to answer and I have a text from Cindy. My day is off to a “roaring start.”

Cindy now has both of her adult daughters and all three of her grandchildren living with her. I’ve talked to Adult Protection Services in Valdosta and Texas. The “Stephaney Situation” is finally blowing over although I may need to testify in Valdosta, Georgia regarding how my niece wound up there and how I realized that there was a problem while at Wynn Unit with my client in Huntsville, Texas. It’s a long story.

Cindy is overwhelmed at “trying to make everyone else happy in my home other than myself.” Cindy does it all and without my help, Cindy would be doing it alone. Maryssa and Makenna argue incessantly and Leigh Ann has a chip on her shoulder regarding her sister, Stephaney moving back home. “Five females fighting” is an ongoing rerun at Cindy’s house. Arguing over the bathrooms, arguing over the chores, arguing about each other. I could go on and on here. Cindy lives at Camp Chaos. Don’t let the happy smile you see Cindy wearing fool you. Cindy spent seventeen years caring for our selfish grandmother. My sister finally snapped over our grandmother and kicked her out after nearly eighteen years. I would have never moved her in. I’m far less tolerant of moochers and morons than Cindy. My twin has the soft heart regarding our family that I possess regarding our clients. It’s a fact. 

Cindy has spent her entire adult life caring for her children and grandchildren and Cindy needs a vacation. Cindy loves leaving her fighting family behind to jump in my SUV and head off to meet clients. Who could blame her? At home, chaos and more chores await my overworked twin sister. 

After listening to Cindy nearly crying while I sat in my SUV at the Tarrant County Clerks Office preparing to file licenses before walking across the street to the county jail, I butt in and suggested “laying down the law. It’s your house. Your adult children are guests. I’m highly concerned about Leigh Ann’s husband, Alex coming to stay from July to August and bringing more chaos. You need to establish rules and guidelines. If you don’t, I will.” Cindy knows I will and it will be far less confrontational if she would snap and start putting her own needs first. If she can’t though, I certainly can.  

My Beto bride sends a text asking “are you home?” I’m twenty minutes from home but at least an hour from attending to filing licenses and meeting my Tarrant County client. I suggest meeting me for lunch at the 7th street Starbucks in an hour after she picks up her wedding photos and gas money. I’m highly concerned about her and her child and have a list of suggestions for her to get back on her feet. I have plenty of time to get to Jack County Jail and Parker County Jail to meet my afternon clients before heading to Willow Lake Event Center with Cindy at 4PM. Leigh Ann will pick up Maryssa and Makenna at 3:30PM and after their incessant arguing this morning on the way to school, Cindy could use a break from the twins and Leigh Ann quite frankly. 

Yesterday, Cindy and I were with our clients at Taylor’s rental looking at bar height tables and chairs for a June graduation party when Leigh Ann sent a group text to Cindy and I regarding Stephaney. I was instantly lit because when my family know we are with clients, the last thing I need are to be blasted with family bickering but, Leigh Ann consistently and repeatedly makes her problems a priority to her mother and I. “Maddy had milk on her mouth and I asked where that milk came from? I went into the living room and Stephaney was eating cereal and had been sharing it with Maddy. I’m so furious about this that my hands are shaking!” 

I walked out of Taylor’s to call Leigh Ann. While she attempted to interrupt me, I interrupted her. “Listen, we are on location with clients. We don’t care about your problems and if Maddy wasn’t hungry she wouldn’t be asking Stephaney to feed her. You need to go feed your daughter and stop disrupting us with stupidity while we are working. We don’t care how mad you are. Now we are mad you bothered to dump your problem on us. Grow up.” I then hung up and practiced smiling in the parking lot before walking back to my clients and sister. 

I abhor disruptions to my carefully orchestrated agenda from family members and everyone realizes it. And yet, the consistent disruptions from my family are a regular and consistent occurrence in not only my life but my twin sisters too. Dash it all. 

What Leigh Ann should have been doing was feeding Maddy first and finishing the Sunday rehearsal photos second. But, explaining prioritizing to my niece is an escapade in futility. 

Meanwhile, my Bridgeport bride had sent me a message on FB that would have to wait until choosing tables and linens and my Allred client wanted to know about the Absentee Affidavit while my Torres client was concerned “about the glass” and my Eastham client wanted to know “how much longer the I60 would take?” My phone never stops ringing and bleeping alerts. 

Preparing myself to text back and answer emails from the Taylors parking lot after happily waving goodbye to my June clients, I turn to Cindy and say “about the California back and forth situation, I’ve come to a decision. We aren’t telling any of our adult children when we are leaving or arriving in California. We need a few days of fun without being drug into drama in San Diego with Leigh Ann, the twins and Alex. We won’t check in on FB. We will pretend we are still in Texas. Wink. Wink.” 

Cindy is shocked by my “plan.” I’m not. I need a break from my family and whether Cindy knows it or not, she does too. My sister is thinking. I jump in before she can respond (as usual) “listen, we are exhausted and overwhelmed. We have a podcast with Karen and then the Twyce Twins, a press release for Power Woman Of The Year, a follow up interview with Kate, and we are juggling 29 clients with new clients each and everyday. We need a vacation and I’m booking us into The Beverly Hills Bungalow for three days of spa, shopping and fun before we hit the bricks on that August wedding in two cities. It’s going to be an ass whipping and if we don’t catch our breath, I’m afraid we will be in the hospital from pure exhaustion. We are bouncing from Louisiana to Arkansas to Oklahoma to California seven times between August and October. It’s time to put our needs in the “front pocket” in order to be camera ready and refreshed for our clients. Our families and their chaos are killing us with stress Pal. Unlike our clients, they dont appreciate our sacrifice today, tomorrow or ever. With them it’s me, me, me, I, I, I. We must hopefully before our 55th birthday in November, learn to put our demanding kids and chaos on the back burner.” 

Warily, and probably feeling guilty (as usual) my twin sister agreed. Traveling gives us the opportunity to enjoy each other’s company but, thanks to cell phones, our family is always a text or phone call away from screwing up the day. It’s a fact.

My son and his wife have been traveling together as an Officiant and photography team the past 4 years. When my son and his wife get into an argument, everyone in my family hears about it. My daughter in law “I can’t drive with him in the car. Nothing I do is right and he makes me nervous.” My son “Stephanie doesn’t pay attention. She’s either driving too slow or driving too fast.” Me “you two are married and work together. Try to stop bickering and work together on learning patience.” Cindy “Robert and Stephanie Hafele are arguing again.” Me “I cannot stop what’s coming. Those two think they are communicating when in fact they are arguing.”

When I’m on location with Leigh Ann as I was last weekend at one of my rehearsals, I’m called “The Boss.” I instruct Leigh Ann on locations for photos and how to pose the wedding party. I wonder how Leigh Ann will handle addressing clients in California when I’m not there telling her what to do? It’s a valid point. I recognize that more flights to California to “save the day” await the Texas Twins. Our adult children are needy and often demanding. Heavy sigh. 

For two years now, I’ve been bouncing between states for inmate weddings. It was essential due to my burgeoning client base to add Leigh Ann as a TDCJ Officiant and to bump county Jail Weddings as well as traditional requests for an Officiant/photographer to Robert and Stephanie. 

Cindy and I are both stretched to the limits. My traditional bookings are now three years out. Weekends and evenings that include holidays are taken up by traditional clients. 

Trying to find a day off is impossible during wedding season. As usual, my anniversary will be bumped into my birthday this year when things slow down. My husband accepts my overwhelming schedule. He knew when he married me that I was an overachiever and accepts it. He’s also fifteen years older than me and turns off his phone from 6PM to 8AM Monday through Friday and altogether on weekends. 

Matthew is “off work when he is off the clock.” We have very different views regarding client needs. I never turn my phone off which may be why my husband is “tuned in” on client needs and family chaos. He hears it all. 

My husband doesn’t have any family to burden him with their problems. I cannot imagine what a worry free blessing that would be to not have adult children or grandchildren and their problems dumped in your lap like my husband doesn’t. Seriously. My husband as well as Cindy’s husband don’t have children which is a remarkable comparison to Cindy and I with our “carnival of chaos kids and grandchildren.” Opposites do attract. Our marriages are proof of that.

I’m going to go over the certified marriage license to address questions about the process of changing an inmate status from single to married. While we are inside a unit, often there will be a copy of the marriage license filed with inmate records. This is not a certified copy. 

What constitutes a certified copy being available has a few caviats. First, the license must be signed by the Officiant AND then filed at the clerks office either in person by the client or via certified mail from me to the clerks office BEFORE a certified copy of the license is available for purchase. 

The certified copy bears a seal deeming it as certified to be true and correct. While the original marriage license (after being signed and filed) can be used for the DMV and SS Office, it CANNOT be used for a change of status to inmate records. 

Only a certified copy of the marriage license can accomplish this task. You will purchase and then mail the certified copy to inmate records at the Unit your spouse is incarcerated at. 

You have 30 days from the date I married you at the Unit to provide a certified copy. You will then need to change your name (if you intend to do so) on your state issued ID for visits to the Unit.

The reason that Units NOW REQUIRE a certified license is to prove the marriage license was filed and is legally binding. 

Apparently, several people were “going through the motions to get married” but, by not filing the license, were effectively not legally married. Due to this issue, certified marriage licenses are now a requirement at many if not all Units.

Reading a text from one of my Coffield Unit brides was truly good news today. The inmate has made parole and will finally be coming home. I cannot wait to Officiate their Vow Renewal with family and friends present to celebrate their new journey of freedom and promise together. God Bless my amazing couple and their resilience. What a blessing.

My Beto bride and sit down together to “go over her plans for her son and their new direction to move to East Texas.” Visiting for a little over an hour before running off to Jack County, I also prayed that this trip would bring my client a new job and positive direction although removing her son from school was somewhat troubling to her. At two years old, her son is resilient enough to change schools now as opposed to being older. I will order her certified license as the Officiant and forward it to her to send to the Unit. 

Since there are many questions about certified marriage licenses, I’m adding a photo of the questionare for Dallas County for your review. 

The cost in Dallas is $10. The cost may vary by county. Tarrant county charges $21. Unlike Dallas county, there is no form online in Tarrant county. Here’s the link– Tarrant County Certified Marriage License Request.

Juggling incoming emails and text messages while sitting in the parking lot of Jack County Jail, my husband sends me a text telling me he loves me. It’s the little things but the stinky skunk development problem is finally over and Matthew is relieved! Thank goodness. We’ve had a month of brain storming to solve the skunk issue and, it’s a month too long. 

I miss my happy go lucky husband. Matthew is actually hilarious when he isn’t stressed out. Cindy and I are looking forward to road tripping to Stiles, San Saba, Crain and Huntsville Units before heading back to Louisiana in May. We love getting away for a day or two and hitting the junk shops together. 

My husband prefers long walks with my feisty Beagle, Foxy Wortham along with the Golf Channel or NASCAR and a dry martini. 

Cindy’s husband left for Canada today so she has 5-6 days before Steve Daniel is back home for a 1-3 day “staycation” at Camp Chaos AKA Cindy and Steve’s house. 

With five females fighting over the bathroom, I’m guessing Steve was “ready to roll.” Fighting for a bathroom isn’t fun at Cindy’s house. I drink a lot of water and coffee and it’s not uncommon for me to stop at Petro on my way to her house to effectively “stand in line.” 

Things will get worse when Alex comes to stay for a month before leaving for San Diego with Leigh Ann, Maddy and the twins. A summer in San Diego will do them all good and an empty house will be a Godsend to Cindy as we bounce all over the place to client bookings. 

In fact, I’m looking forward to Cindy staying at my house for our slumber parties and spook movie nights.

My Saturday clients are so much fun that Leigh Ann and I can’t wait to see them again. I love it when clients at outgoing and spirited at photo shoots.We love our LBGT clients and I’m looking forward to seeing the rest of the rehearsal photos for Brokk and Ruben. 

Since I’ve been asked, I do stop and start blogs between bookings. I just leave my WordPress app open and pick up where I’ve left off. All of my blogs are typed with one finger on my iPhone. Often, while waiting on a client at a Unit or venue. I spend a lot of time waiting as I’m always early.

I reviewed another email regarding someone else blogging on one of my sites and will once again go over why I have no interest in “guest writers.” First, my content is entirely my own and based on my experiences with clients and my family since they are both combined. 

Secondly, I have no interest in sharing my platform with others. 

Thirdly, I do not allow back links on any of my sites. Sorry, but, I’m not now nor will I ever be interested in having a guest blogger.

I’m off to the Parker County Courthouse and looking forward to meeting all of my new clients in the coming weeks… 

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“Everybody Clings To Their Own Fear. Everybody Hides Their Scars” Moving On Down The Highway…

Wednesday afternoon while headed to Willow Lake Event Center, my TDCJ Beto Client called me while exiting Santa Fe towards the venue and my “traditional clients.” Sitting at the red light watching semi’s pulling out of Petro, I hit “accept” and wondered where my brother in law, Steve was driving since I hadn’t heard from him since Monday and if my niece, Stephaney would get the waitress job she had applied for at Petro? My mind never stops.

Apparently, the Warden at Beto had called my bride which is somewhat unusual. I shifted my attention to her to find out more. “He will be behind glass. The glass upsets me. I was hoping to hold his hand or hug him but, we will be separated. I’m terribly upset about this.” Dang. I was rattled myself. “The glass.” No one loves the glass. 

Since I was thirty five minutes early for my appointment at Willow Lake and only twelve minutes away, I pulled into Petro to attempt to calm down my client. 

I should note that the majority of my “upset client calls” will always be my Prison Wedding Clients. Why? Because they are not in control of a lengthy process that often confuses them and occasionally even scares or angers them. I’m the hand holder. I’m generally the go between and I’m usually the one talking to the Warden. 

The glass is something no one is ever comfortable with. Behind the glass, the inmate is also handcuffed. At Ferguson Unit, the inmate was also locked into the cage behind the glass. 

Ferguson was also the first time I would encounter an inmate behind the glass and effectively, shocking to me. I didn’t expect the glass although my client was prepared for it. Occasionally while inside the visitation area for a wedding ceremony, I will notice the glass cracked or writing on the wood. I asked one guard “how did the glass get broken?” 

The answer surprised me. “Well, Miss Wendy, the inmates get angry at visitors and hit the glass.” Hit the glass? To the person that drove all the way to the Unit? Waited in a long line. Went through the screening process? I was shocked. The wiring under (also sometimes above) the glass was how my client and I communicated with the inmate. It’s essential that the inmate can understand the commitment aspect of the wedding ceremony. 

I was more than a little nervous about the inmate hearing and subsequently, understanding me but, he could easily hear and understand the ceremony. 

The wedding photo above thrilled my client because the glass “merged them together.” Walking back to the parking lot, I hid my silent tears from my client and “braced myself” for smiles a few miles from the Unit for her wedding photos. I didn’t want her to know how rattled I was about the glass and the wedding photos. I hid my sorrow intentionally. She couldn’t touch him. It pained me. 

As a mother, the aspect of marrying an inmate is a lonely life of isolation for many of my clients marrying an inmate that is often serving 20, 30, 50 years or even life. My clients may never see their spouse on the outside. It’s not an easy path. They may never touch them. 

I worry about my TDCJ Clients and on occasion, have even talked a few out of marrying the inmate. It’s a rare occurrence but, it has happened. The “Coffield Unit Con Man” who attempted to control my client and her money needed the boot and got it. 

On my fourth phone call from my emotional Coffield client, I had suggested that she consider what the inmate was bringing to her life. If the only “gift” was strife and argument, it was a gift that she needed to give back. 

It took a month but, the Prison Wedding Planning Process isn’t “quick or easy.” If one of my TDCJ clients wants “out,” they have time to effectively “hit the highway.”

Mary was determined to marry Lester. Her path wasn’t easy. It would take months. Mary would never touch Lester. The glass would always be separating them from one another even on their wedding day. 

The glass didn’t make Mary uncomfortable as it hadn’t made Nikia uncomfortable. Mary and Nikia were prepared for the separation. I was the only one uncomfortable with the glass and the inability of my clients to touch their new spouses. It always saddens me. 

It’s difficult for me to accept that for a number of my clients, they will never touch their spouse. The glass will be a part of every visit they make to the Unit. It will be a permanent “barrier.” 

The glass is something neither I or anyone else can  change but, it always saddens me nonetheless. It’s something I must accept ascmy clients have. It’s also something “I’m working on.” G4 and G5 inmates are always behind the glass. Lifers are too. I’m never really prepared mentally to Officiate a ceremony that won’t be “sealed with a kiss.” My heart hurts. I have had hundreds and even over a thousand “other couples” to compare my wedding ceremonies to. 

From my couples “on the outside” to couples “on the inside,” the differences between both sets of my clients is significant. 

While one set of my clients worries about the perfect dress, the perfect cake, the perfect venue, the guest list, the DJ, the photographer and more, the other set of clients drives several hours to get to the Unit, worry that their clothing will be within the visitation guideline, and try to remember to bring quarters to buy low quality wedding photos for $3 each if they are even offered at the Unit. Private Units do not offer photos. 

I had finally calmed my Beto client down “about the glass” before pulling out of Petro. It wasn’t an “easy conversation” it never is when a client is upset. 

Mentally, I prepared myself for the first “behind the glass” ceremony at Beto. I wondered if they would have the phones Allred did that no one could hear using? I hoped my bride wouldn’t cry seeing the inmate behind the glass. 

I recalled my Coffield client vomiting in a trash can beside me when we walked in to find her beau behind the glass. The shock rattled her to such an extent that it took several moments to calm her before proceeding with the ceremony. She also “nearly ran” from the Unit following the ceremony. I was forced to chase her down because I feared that if she left the Unit upset, she might have a car accident. Luckily, I had plenty of time to talk her through the shock of the glass and explain to her that it was something neither of us could control. 

Normally, I leave one Unit to head to another. On the Coffield Unit day of “the glass,” I wasn’t due at another Unit for several hours and had plenty of time to spend with my client. She was so upset that she skipped doing bridal photos and I bought her lunch instead at the infamous General Store in Tennessee Colony. 

Thursday morning at 6AM, I checked in with my Beto bride. I was juggling several other “traditional clients” on my books for rehearsals Wednesday evening, Thursday evening and Friday evening for wedding ceremonies at venues on Saturday and Sunday. I was also apprehensive about how my bride would react to “the glass.” 

In fact, I was so worried about my bride that I offered to drive her myself to the Unit. This is rare but, it’s happened. My Estes bride didn’t drive and took a bus from Houston to Fort Worth. I picked her up and took her to breakfast before driving her to Sanders Estes for her ceremony and upon leaving the Unit, had a great time with her at the Botanic Gardens getting some fun bridal photos for her. 

I’m different. You will hear me say this over and over because it’s true. I care about my clients and their journey. It’s not an easy journey for TDCJ clients.

At 9:30AM Thursday, I had already been to the post office to mail photos and contracts to clients, filled up my SUV, hit the bank for quarters, met with my Saturday client to go over vendor details and driven through a Starbucks for egg white bites and a non fat latte. My Beto bride was to meet me at 9:30 and leave her car at my home. 

The drive to Beto could run two hours and fifteen minutes to two hours and thirty minutes based on traffic and road construction. 

Sitting in my SUV and responding to emails regarding Roach, Darrington, Hutchins, Bradshaw and Garza East Units while sipping my latte, I checked the time, 10:01AM. Alarmed, I sent a text to my bride to ask where she was? 

A few minutes later, she responded “my son was late to school and I need to leave him with my inlaws. They live in DeSoto.” I quickly checked the distance from DeSoto to Beto and DeSoto to my location to Beto. 

There was no way my client could get from DeSoto to me and me to drive to Beto and arrive by 1PM. Because of this, I suggested meeting me at Beto. I would arrive first and if my client was runnng late, explain her tardiness to the wardens secretary. I also immediately left my driveway headed for Beto.

With my preselected stack of cd’s beside me, it would be a day of music from artists with the first name of John. I noticed this before jumping on 20 to head to 287. Usually, I just grab a stack from my case and apparently, my husband had organized cd’s in the order of the first name. I thought I was OCD lol. 

From Johnny Cash to John Cougar Mellencamp to John Denver and John Fogerty, I opted for Fogerty and thought about the hearing and lawsuit he had won regarding being himself. For those unaware of the irony or the story, here’s the link– John Fogerty Plagiarism Suit 1988. Plagiarizing himself? How could he be anyone else. The case went before the Supreme Court. 

With “Here We Go Rocking All Over The World” blaring on my radio, I jumped onto the highway. I would be “on the dash” because I had planned to leave at 9:30AM with my client. I operate on strict timelines that allow a “cushion.” I’m not a last minute anything type of person. 

The drive through Waxahachie is often time consuming due to traffic but, I was making good time and checked in with my client on her GPS estimated arrival time. 

Taking several phone calls during my trip, Cindy and Stephaney were at her second interview at Petro. Steve was in New York. 

My son was in Arkansas and my husband was back at the “Stinky Skunk Development In Springtown.” Leigh Ann was editing photos for three clients. The skunk development has been an ongoing escapade. Everyone in my husband’s office questions “why Matthew is handling it himself?” John, the builder had never encountered a problem of this magnitude. In fact, no one had. My husband has tried everything to get the smell out of the house and if he can’t, will be the person forced to deal with the homeowner returning from Japan May 4th. The same day I’m out of town with clients and my team. Ugh.

Driving through Eureka, Texas and thinking to myself “there should be an exclamation point after the name,” I check back in with my client. She’s due to arrive at Beto at 12:47PM. I’m rolling in (according to navigation lady) at 12:32PM. 

I changed my cd to Elton John and paid attention to the words as I sang along to “let us strive to make a way to make all hatred cease. There’s a man over there. What’s his color? I don’t care. He’s my brother. Let us, let us live in peace” as I rolled on over a long bridge with a peaceful lake that no one is ever using on my trips to Tennessee Colony. Why doesn’t anyone use that lake? I wonder this on every trip across the bridge. 

Twenty minutes out from the Unit, I call Cindy before popping in John Cougar and laughing about his “hey, hit the highway!” Its funny to me because I’m always hitting the highway and “finding a lover that won’t drive you crazy” while stating that you want them to “hit the highway” is somewhat offensive and blunt to say the least. It’s also funny. John Cougar is a real character. 

The joys of road construction in Tennessee Colony continue. Now the “follow me” truck has moved from Coffield/Michael to Beto/Gurney. Jeez. I call my bride. She’s about ten minutes behind me. I remind her not to speed and get pulled over. 

As I stand in the parking area looking for my client, I decide to go to the entrance and alert the tower of my arrival. She arrives a few minutes later looking beautiful in slacks with blonde hair. I wonder if she had colored it since I had last seen her? I love the cut. As usual, I consider growing my hair out and trying to go with a new style but, who are we kidding here? I constantly try to cut my own hair and lack the patience to grow my hair out. 

Walking into the Unit, we screen in and wait. As usual, my bra sets off the metal detector and we take a seat. I’d skip the underwire but, I’m far too busty. One day, maybe when I have time, I will get a reduction.

My friendly guard comes to escort us and asks “how is your twin doing?” Cindy’s basement has flooded yet again from heavy rain and I’m headed to Parker County today after filing licenses in Tarrant County to help her mop up. The Daniel Diva house consistently floods in the basement. We’ve had twenty years of flooding at Cindy’s. It’s an ongoing escapade.

Walking in, I look for the phone or a hole under the glass. There isn’t one. The steel mesh above the glass is how the inmate will hear us. It’s difficult to get a clear photo with the glass and the area we are in is somewhat cramped. My client is doing well under the circumstances. She’s not crying or upset.

Leaving the Unit, I suggest stopping at the General Store for her to use the restroom and offer to buy her a cola. I was surprised to hear that she doesn’t consume caffeine and bought her a cranberry juice instead. 

We head to my favorite new abandoned building outside Tennessee Colony on the way back to Corsicana. I love the peeling paint and forgotten “look” of this building right off the remote back roads.My bride is joyous the wedding is over and she can now have some fun. Most of my clients have the most fun with me on location photography shoots. As I go through my rolling photo booth switching out props and changing areas, my Saturday client, Brok sends a text to confirm Saturday at 3PM. I answer “my team and I will be there with bells on.” 

Brok responds “we are so excited!” My team and I are too. I’ve been looking forward to this wedding and celebration for a month now. They are incorporating hand fasting into their ceremony and I love creative input. Brok and Ruben are so much fun. My bride loved the props I had packed and I asked “how much gas do you have? Do you have to stop for gas on your way back to DeSoto?” She did so I handed her an extra roll of quarters from my SUV and gave her a hug as I headed on to Hodge Unit to meet my next client. 

I want only good things for all of my clients. My TDCJ clients often face a difficult journey because they are effectively “pulling the wagon alone.” For many of them, the inmate faces many years but, for my Beto bride, the inmate is due for release in three. I’m happy to hear this because at the very least, she will have an opportunity to experience married life “on the outside.” 

A very large percentage of my clients will never have the opportunity. My heart is heavy for the journey they will face without ever having an opportunity to hold their partners hand. Their passion and resilience is unmatched by most couples. The sheer dedication of my clients is amazing. They don’t give up. For them, live isn’t only a four letter word. It’s their life. Love believes all things and bears all things for my TDCJ Clients. 

My husband sends a text from his office that cracks me up near Corsicana. The staff had sprinkled powder and purchased a stuffed skunk to surprise him. It’s hard to laugh about the skunk that’s caused so many problems but, my husband did.Hopefully, in the coming week, the smell is resolved before the homeowner returns. My husband saw an Elk near the new home and was amazed at the wildlife out in Springtown. I remind him of my encounter with a black bear on the patio of the lake house in Arkansas. I’m not a “country person.” If I never encounter another bear, I’m “good with it.”

Rolling back onto the highway outside Corsicana, I pop in Melissa Etheridge and “Everybody Has A Hunger No Matter Who They Are.” Melissa is right. I’m hungry for dinner back home and looking forward to sharing supper with Matthew before running off to Marty Leonard Chapel to meet clients. 

I hope my clients and connections enjoy a beautiful weekend of sunshine and enjoy a few good times, great music and Spring weather… 

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Your INFLUENCE On Others Can Make THEIR JOURNEY A JOYFUL TRIP Or A LONG HAUL…The Choice Is Up To You…

This morning while grabbing a quick coffee prior to “hitting the road,” my husband asked me the same question he asks everyday “is there anything I can do for you?” Sounds like a simple question but, the depth and the meaning aren’t overlooked by me. My husband would do anything for me and I know it. The same is true of me for him or my twin sister, my grandnieces, my son, my nieces and my clients. 

I’m just as driven, determined and dedicated to making my clients day as worry free and pleasant as possible as I am with my own family. 

Everyday is a “no repeat” day. There are no re takes or do overs. Being the best version of yourself might sound silly to anyone who hasn’t faced death. The fragile nature of life is lost on them. It isn’t lost on my twin sister, my husband or our children. Why? Because my twin sister nearly died in an accident at 23 years old. 

For fifteen years now, I’ve faced several surgeries to fight “the C word.” I cram as many “moments into each day” as humanly possible. I don’t take any day of my life for granted. Instead, these minutes, these moments, these opportunities are viewed as the gifts they are. I’m “C free” and have been for several years but each and every check up, I literally “brace myself for bad news.” By the grace of God, I haven’t heard any in five years. 

Laying out my usual array of CD’s for my drive to TDCJ Coffield Unit, Donna Summer, Elton John, Lenard Skynard, Rod Stewart, Chicago and Jim Croce would be keeping me company on this trip since Cindy was busy in Parker County, Leigh Ann had a booking on the courthouse steps and my son was on his way to Houston. 

I don’t mind driving alone on Texas highways or anywhere else for that matter. Music occupies my mind and keeps me company. I know all of the words to all of my favorite CD’s. 

My husband only knows the beat or rhythm to music and nearly never pays attention to the words. I find his favorite AC/DC song to be the only song he actually does know the words to hilarious. What is it? Thunder Struck. It cracks me up. 

Checking in with my Thursday Beto bride to confirm timelines after passing through Corsicana and hoping rain wouldn’t ruin my Tuesday and Thursday photo shoots after Unit weddings, my 2 hour and fifteen minute trip to Tennessee Colony was running closer to 2 1/2 due to the usual road construction. Heavy sigh. 

Sitting in a line of traffic, I had time to review email requests for Goodman Unit, Middleton Unit, Garza East, Ellis, Estelle, Clements, and Dominguez Units. I review at least 5-8 new requests every 2-3 days for prison weddings. 

Even I am often surprised at the sheer numbers of clients wanting to marry an inmate. Texas is our highest booking state with California running second and Louisiana third in requests for an Inmate Officiant. 

Since I was driving without a copilot, I called the prospective clients back rather than emailing them. 

Road construction to Tennessee Colony is a virtual mess of mazes through small towns. I often wonder where everyone works or why people just abandon old farmhouses and leave them to decay. What happened? 

In Texas towns that have a Prison, nearly everyone works for TDCJ. The number of employees who have retired and returned to TDCJ is impressive. 

One law library clerk told me “2025 is my retirement year and I won’t be coming back like everyone else does. I will leave the bars behind me and find something to do outside of the prison.” I am fairly sure he means it. My husband checked in several times along the way and let me know he had a dentist appointment today. Like me, Matthew hates going to the dentist but, it’s a necessary evil. 

Listening to Chicago “being without you takes a lot of getting used to,” I remind my husband to take an Aleve to prevent a headache at the dentist. 

I then reminded myself to call Cindy since she’s the one “I was without” on my Tennessee Colony trip. 

Cindy doesn’t enjoy riding with me to Tennessee Colony because “there’s nothing to do.” She’s right. There are no shopping centers or cafes and the only drop off point is the General Store. There are five Prisons though and I make the trip here at least twice a month to one or more of the five Tennessee Colony Prisons. 

Rolling into Tennessee Colony with my bride a few minutes behind me, I sent my husband the “greeting” sign featuring TDCJ Units located in the city that features only one General Store. 

Nearly everyone in the General Store either “knows someone employed by TDCJ or is related to someone employed at one of the Units.” 

Five Units house inmates within fairly close proximity of one another in Tennessee Colony. Coffield and Michael are both located behind the same guard entrance gate. The close proximity of Coffield and Michael are convenient for me because I can move from Coffield wedding ceremonies starting at 9AM to Michael which usually schedules me in at 10:30 or later which is how I literally “bounce” from Coffield to Michael with fluid frequency to meet my clients and conduct their wedding ceremony. 

Often I “stack” clients if I have more than one client at the same Unit with thirty minute intervals for each client. After I complete wedding ceremonies at Units, my clients and I find a place for their bridal photos. 

Bouncing from Coffield or Michael to Beto or Gurney wouldn’t be quite as convenient as you would need to leave the Coffield/Michael Units to drive “back through town” and down another two lane road to get to Beto, Gurney or Powledge. 

Coffield and Michael schedule inmate weddings on Tuesdays. Other Tennessee Colony Units prefer Thursday’s. I’m in Tennessee Colony so often that I could literally drive it blindfolded. In fact, I’m back in Tennessee Colony on Thursday. This time at Beto then on to Hodge Unit. Hodge Unit is in Rusk, Texas and forty five miles from Beto. 

I’ve left Tennessee Colony Units to drive to Huntsville Units on more than a few occasions. Huntsville is also a city of Prisons and one hundred and two miles from Tennessee Colony. It’s a very long day to leave Fort Worth to Tennessee Colony to Huntsville but, it’s doable. 

I’ve spent up to eighteen hours driving from Unit A to Unit B and occasionally even Unit C before heading back to Fort Worth to rise and shine at 3AM and start all over again. Whatever I can do to keep from renting a hotel for prison weddings, I do during the week as weekends often find me at Destination Events and staying at hotels. With my schedule, finding time to be home at night and see my family during wedding season is difficult at best but, I give it my best shot. Having a copilot helps tremendously as my twin and I take turns driving to locations over 6 hours from the DFW area. 

Arriving at Coffield Unit, I was thrilled to see my beautiful bride wearing a wedding dress. This is a rare treat. I loved the entire ensemble. Her bouquet was perfect match to her dress. 

Although my bride wasn’t allowed to bring her bouquet into the Unit, I couldn’t wait to incorporate it into her bridal photos after we left Coffield Unit. Her smile said it all. 

My TDCJ clients are nervous, excited and exhilarated to finally be getting married. It’s a long and arduous process. Michael Unit won’t allow dresses or skirts of ANY TYPE inside the Unit. Advising my Michael Unit brides that only slacks are allowed isn’t an easy conversation but, it is necessary. The Rule at Michael is unbending. 

The “wait” at Coffield is always surprising. Occasionally you can “get right in” while other times the wait can run anywhere from 1-3 hours inside the Unit. My bride and I checked in together at 8:50AM for a 9:00AM scheduled wedding ceremony. I had expected to be out of Coffield by 10 at the latest. Instead, it would be after 11 before we finally walked out of the Unit together. 

“Screening in” can be a time consuming ordeal. I always screen in first. I decided that while my bride was being screened, I would head to the Wardens Office to sign in and pay for Unit photos at $3 each. I always buy three photos for my clients as a courtesy.

Luckily, I had bought 2 rolls of quarters rather than one since I’m at Beto on Thursday as my Tuesday bride had forgotten her quarters and realized it in the parking lot. To solve the problem, I emptied my Beto quarters into the Coffield baggie to cover us for 6 photos at Coffield. I’m nothing if not prepared. 

I can (and will)  get quarters for Beto on my way to Erath County on Wednesday for Beto on Thursday. 

I never go to a Prison without quarters. Often my client may forget to bring quarters for photos and a wedding ceremony is the one event where clients want as many photos as they can get although the quality of the photos is often “questionable.” 

If we all have our heads in the photo, it’s a good day. Guards are not professional photographers and “you get what you get.” 

Amazingly, Estes Unit by far has the best Unit photos. This is saying a lot from me because all of my clients want Unit photos. 

Privately owned Units rarely (if ever) offer wedding day photos. Sanders Estes takes the best Prison photos I’ve seen from any Prison in Texas. 

Sanders Estes is also the only Unit where a guest or guests have been allowed to witness the ceremony. 

Sanders Estes Unit
Sanders Estes Unit

Clear or “in focus” photos are rare at Prison Weddings. Allred actually runs a close second with Hodge Unit coming in third regarding photo clarity and quality. 

Allred Unit
Hodge Unit
Beto Unit

Back to the waiting area at Coffield, my client and I would continue to wait while another bride waited on her “other Officiant.” 

I’m well aware of this “other Officiant” because she is almost always late and always unfriendly. I pay little or no attention to her intentionally although I WISH she would pay more attention to her clients and arrive on time. 

The entire Unit accommodates prison weddings and her work ethics are embarrassing and inconvenient to not only her own clients but also myself and my clients who are “effectively forced to wait on her to ride in on her broom with an attitude.” Prison Weddings aren’t planned overnight. The process is time consuming and stressful to clients who anxiously await wedding day. 

From start to finish, planning a Prison wedding can take anywhere from three weeks to months. The “person on the outside” will send an Absentee Affidavit and the “person on the inside” will request a TDCJ ID that can take several weeks. 

Once the “person on the inside” has the Absentee Affidavit and ID Notarized, the “person on the outside” will use both documents to purchase the marriage license. The “person on the inside” will then file an I60 Request For Marriage Form listing the TDCJ Approved Officiant on the paperwork. 

The I60 requires up to 6 signatures. Once approved, the Warden will hand the chaplain the paperwork to set the date and time for the marriage. The TDCJ Officiant will then confirm the date and time assigned. I.E. Prison wedding planning is a lengthy process. 

I created a video to walk prospective clients through the process. Here’s the link– TDCJ Approved Officiant Wendy Wortham Explains The Prison Wedding Planning Process. 

One of my clients, Mary, waited months to get approved for her wedding. Another, JoJo, waited over a year. Still another waited six months at Stiles Unit. Part of the issues these clients faced that made their journey more difficult involved Unit transfers or a CLM status or other “hiccups.” I spend months walking each of my TDCJ client facing “hurdles” through a confusing process. I also become everyone’s mother when a Prison wedding has hurdles. 

I spend FAR more time talking or corresponding with TDCJ Clients than I ever will with a Texas Twins Events, Pawning Planners or other client booked through a venue that I’m on staff with. Prison Wedding Planning is by far more complicated than a “traditional wedding.” 

On weekends and evenings, I’m often working with “traditional clients” or on site at a venue when a call from a TDCJ client may come in. I juggle everyone everyday and return calls every 2-3 hours. 

My “job” never ends with any of my clients because they offer re book with myself and my staff for other services including Vow Renewals upon release of the inmate or Baptisms and these clients ALWAYS refer their friends and family to my staff and I. We have earned our reputation of excellence by exceeding our clients expectations. These clients are like family to my staff and I. They are far more than a “Gig” or “Booking.” 

Waiting on “another Officiant” is the last thing any client needs on wedding day. Having everyone else on site for their wedding wait on “another Officiant” who obviously has a blatant disregard for everyone else’s time continues to infuriate me. 

The “other Officiant” needs to buy a watch or find a new business that isn’t based on being timely, organized or articulate.  

At Allred, my clients and I were forced to wait yet again due to this same “other Officiant.” It’s aggravating to me that people don’t view being late as stealing because it is. You are taking something you cannot replace. These brides or grooms have waited months on their wedding day. 

The last thing anyone wants to do on wedding day is to wait on “another Officiant” who is unprofessional and uncaring. When “another Officiant” consistently being tardy to a Unit subsequently forces my clients and I to wait on their arrival for my clients wedding ceremony to take place, such conduct annoys my clients as well as pissing me off at the same time. Some people take no pride in their work ethics. 

Hire someone with a stellar track record and responsible behavior. It will save you a lot of grief. It can also save you money. How? Well, if you’ve hired someone who doesn’t return your calls or answer your emails, you might very well have also hired someone so unreliable (obviously not affiliated with Texas Twins Events) that they won’t bother to show up on wedding day! 

How do I know about NO SHOWS? Because I’ve been hired as second and even the third Officiant or Planner or BOTH over and over for years by clients who had “hired the wrong vendor to begin with.”  

That’s right. I’ve taken calls from hysterical brides or their mothers or members of the wedding party for YEARS who found themselves wishing the  had hired Texas Twins Events in the first place but instead, found themselves ALONE at a Unit or venue with a MIA Officiant or Planner (obviously not affiliated in any way, shape or form with my staff).

These “emergency requests at the 11th hour” have been going on for so many years now that I now have emergency fees in place based on our availability. After all, my staff and I DON’T HAVE EMERGENCIES. The client who hired the WRONG VENDOR is HAVING AN EMERGENCY. 

I will never forget the TCU wedding party calling me years ago about “two hundred guests waiting and we can’t get in touch with our Officiant. We need someone here as soon as possible.” I had been working on a Texas Twins Treasures trunk and obviously unprepared to “run off and save the day” but, due to the hysterical phone call, changed my clothes and dashed over to the church. 

Arriving with everyone upset and agitated, I had no idea what they wanted for their ceremony, names of the wedding party, who was giving the bride away or anything else for that matter. Also and more importantly, who was paying MY FEE? Upon inquiring about my fee in the midst of the circus environment of chaos, I was told “we didn’t bring any money because we paid the other Officiant.” 

Oh, you mean the person who DIDN’T bother showing up? I advised the wedding party of the facts since paying the No Show Officiant doesn’t benefit me one iota. “I received a hysterical phone call on my day off begging me to drop everything and run over here to save YOUR wedding. If you don’t have funding to pay my fee, I will be leaving now and ya all can have a great party.” 

Turning to leave, someone managed to come up with my fee. I am not a volunteer. I’m a staunch professional who effectively “goes to work” in exchange for consideration. If you have no money, you can submit a bartered item proposal through my sister site, The Pawning Planners.

After the “TCU incident,” and similar escapades that included excuses pertaining to paying the “other Officiant” that prevented these hysterical folks from paying me or anyone in my staff who ACTUALLY DID SHOW UP when the initial vendor hired and more importantly, PAID DID NOT, all of my sites were updated with “emergency fee structures” as well as holiday fees. I don’t have emergencies and no one on my Team does either. 

I abhor tardiness. Worse, are the “consistently tardy people” who assume that by being tardy that their behavior is acceptable to everyone else who are effectively forced to wait on them. 

I’m never late. Ever. I leave a minimum of 30 minutes to an hour earlier than necessary for every commitment I have. I plan ahead. Not showing up at an event? NEVER. But, I’m not like everyone else. My staff aren’t either. Our booked clients are OUR PRIORITY. 

Since the other Officiant was MIA and most likely running 20-30 minutes late (as usual), her client was alone and feeling somewhat insecure about “screening in” since the alarm kept going off when she attempted to “clear in.” 

The “hold up” at screening due to the other client bringing a ring box and ring into the Unit. Ring boxes have metal hinges. Metal interferes with the metal detector. Whether it’s jewelry, a watch, a girdle with boning or a bra with underwire or even a ring box, YOU MUST CLEAR the machine to enter ANY TDCJ UNIT. 

I strongly advise all of my clients not to bring anything other than their current state issued ID, Marriage License, car keys and quarters. It will save you and I time screening in and make our visit far more pleasant on wedding day.

Having someone walk in bewildered and alone while wondering if their “other Officiant” is going to bother showing up is just too much for me. I often wish they had someone reliable in their corner during what is often already an emotional process but, again, I cannot save everyone from hiring the wrong Officiant. I’ve seen it happen before and I will see it happen again. I’m not only referring to Prisons either. 

My office “fields” emergency Officiant calls on a regular basis because someone hired the wrong Officiant, Photographer or Planner. You know, the “other Officiant or vendor who were paid to show up but didn’t.” 

Getting a call from a frantic bride, groom, mother of the bride or groom to one of our  Texas Twins Events cell phones from someone in a panic because “our Officiant didn’t show up” or “our planner isn’t here” or “our photographer isn’t here and we need you to send someone over immediately” are the types of phone calls no one wants to take. 

Don’t these frantic callers assume that we aren’t already on location? You know with the clients who booked with us. We can’t save everyone. What we can do is put our clients needs first and if I have any available staff, send them to the “emergency” caller. But, these emergency services come at a higher rate. Also, emergency services are based entirely on availability. Our clients don’t have emergencies because they booked with Texas Twins Events. 

I’m booked up to 2 years out and no longer take on emergency Officiant bookings. The reason for this is that you are effectively “going in cold” with clients you know nothing about who are often angry, anxious and upset because “someone else” had let them down. It’s an awful situation for the client who trusted the “wrong person” but again, I cannot save everyone. My staff cannot save everyone. Our priorities are our booked clients first and foremost.  Everyone else is secondary. 

Emergency Officiant situations are redirected to my staff and their availability. I work 7 days a week and can’t run off from my existing clients “to save the day” for a “stranger” simply because they ask me to. 

I strongly urge people who have been wronged AKA “STOOD UP” by another vendor to get a refund before calling Texas Twins Events and expecting us to drop everything because “we help everyone.” We help people who hired us in the first place. File a small claims lawsuit against the person who knowingly and willfully “ruined your wedding day.” Why? Because you paid them to show up that’s why. You trusted them to honor their end of the bargain and they failed you. This my friends is called “Breach of Oral or Implied Contract.” It you have paid for a service you didn’t receive, it’s also called “Theft Of Services.” Study up and know your rights as a consumer. 

Booked clients take precedence over anyone else coming to us at the 11th hour in a panic because they initially hired someone else. Not OUR luggage- Not OUR trip. 

No one on my staff has ever and I mean never will not been on site at a booked event. It will never happen in my lifetime. I have a full staff for this very reason. If someone becomes ill, there is always a backup that will not be scheduled on the same day. I have never missed a booking in my life, if I’m sick, I go to the ER or Urgent Care and get a shot before heading to my booking or after my job is through.

At Sanders Estes Unit, I had three brides and immense pain. Why? Kidney stones. I waited hours to go to the ER to ensure my clients needs were met first. I was also flying to California 36 hours after this photo was taken and terrified my pain was due to a ruptured appendix but, my bloody urine actually eased my mind. Kidney stones again. Ugh. 

Would I have gotten on that plane following an appendectomy? Yes. Against doctors orders I would have. I would also have sought medical treatment in California if I experienced any complications from surgery in Texas. But, by the Grace of God, my pain wasn’t due to my appendix. My smile on the railroad tracks literally masks my discomfort. No one has the work ethics that I possess other than my twin sister, Cindy. 

There are no sick days or emergencies in the events industry. Whatever is going on in my life or my staffs lives takes a backseat to our clients needs. There’s always an ER or Urgent Care facility open after hours. 

“Work ethics AND morals are like a good set of tires. Everything you have is riding on them.”

Cindy Daniel

The ring at Coffield shouldn’t have been there. Since many of my clients inquire about rings, I’m going to go over Section K of the Administrative Directive because the question regarding rings comes up frequently with my TDCJ Clients. 

I’ve memorized the Administrative Directive and no, I don’t call wardens and ask them to make exceptions because they are running a Prison and very busy and also because as a TDCJ Officiant, it’s expected that we know and understand the rules and guidelines set forth pertaining to inmate marriage and, I do. 

Offender property prevents ring exchanges and yet… the other bride was unaware of the limitations that would require her to leave the Unit with the ring she had brought. 

I suggested that the guard remove the ring from the box setting off the metal detector and that the  bride wear the ring herself as I also explained to this young bride that wedding ring exchanges are strictly forbidden. The bride then told me “the Warden said I could put it on but I would have to take it off when I left.” Oh, so someone called a Warden to ask to bring a wedding ring into the Unit although it’s unauthorized? Wow. It’s tough to surprise me but, calling a Warden to ask for something because it isn’t allowed isn’t a good idea. In fact, it’s something that I strongly suggest no one does. 

I’m just going to put this out there because giving someone a ring on wedding day only to have to remove it and effectively “take it back” is perhaps even more emotionally traumatic than not presenting it in the first place but, that’s my opinion. 

My clients are strongly advised against calling the Warden to ask for something that’s prohibited in the first place. It’s far better to follow the Administrative Directive. That’s why there is one put in place giving inmates the right to marry in TDCJ Units. 

By the time my client and I were called to go to the Visitation Area, my bride and I were more than ready to “get the show on the road.” After all, we had been waiting for quite some time and having the “other Officiant” haughtily stare at me enjoying a conversation with not only my client but also her own client was more than a little awkward for her I’m guessing. 

I can talk to anyone and I can certainly befriend anyone who is unaware that a ring box is going to set off the machine. “Clearing” a machine is essential to entering the Unit. Whether you need to disrobe, take your hair down, remove a ring from the box or whatever else is setting off the machine, compliance is required. My bride had to take her beautiful updo down. It’s very distressing on wedding day but, clearing the machine isn’t “optional.” 

Walking through the heavy doors into the visitation area, I decided to use both backdrops for photos because lighting is often an issue at Coffield. I wanted my bride to have the best possible photos from her wedding. 

The groom was nervous and thrilled to see his bride. These moments are emotional. My client and her beau have been through phone calls, confusing paperwork and long wait times to stand with me to marry. They are excited and yet, apprehensive. No one knows what to expect. I lay out the rules. “You can hold hands. You can hug. You can kiss twice but no open mouth. No groping. We will be respectful and stay within the guidelines.” I also remind both parties “although this wedding is taking place inside a prison, once I sign and file this license, you are legally married and dissolving your union will require a divorce. Do you both agree to continue?” They always do. I’ve never had anyone change their mind on wedding day but, I have had a few people hyperventilate and even vomit. I’m not specifically speaking only about Prisons either. I’ve seen pretty much everything in my years of the events industry.  

My hair was a mess with humidity and my usual ponytail pulled most of it out of my face. I had cut my bangs again while waiting on a client at Green Bay Unit and as usual, messed my hair up AGAIN. I need to throw my cuticle scissors out of my SUV and stop taking whacks at my bangs but, for years I’ve been guilty of attempting to cut my own bangs and botching it. Time is something I don’t have. 

My couple looked fantastic and although the groom was a little nervous, he relaxed before posing for photos. 

My bride was a delight in every way. I love my clients. My “client” is the person on the outside. This confuses people but shouldn’t. The person on the outside is responsible for finding their TDCJ Approved Officiant. I don’t advertise and I never have. 

Frankly, my reputation is why and how I stay booked. Referral business is a gift. If you are doing your job right, you won’t need to advertise. Moving over to the other backdrop across the visitation area, the groom wanted to see the license after I had signed it. Occasionally, the groom or bride want to view the license and I found this to be a “sweet moment.” I had no idea that this wedding had been something the couple had planned for years. The reason the groom wanted to see my signature was to know “the deal was done.” 

My bride had told me something that was not only real but also raw with honesty as we stood waiting on a guard to unlock the heavy steel door. I turned to face her as she said “Wendy, I’m doing time too while he’s in here. For years I’ve thought I can’t keep doing this. He has to want to get it together and, he finally does.” She was absolutely right. I thought of the line in a song on one of my cd’s and just as the heavy steel door was being unlocked “I can’t wait upon a lovers cross for you” Jim Croce. No one can wait upon a lovers cross forever. I understood completely what my bride had meant. 

The person on the outside is a warrior. They make all of the sacrifices. My bride had waited because she wanted light at the end of the tunnel and I pray she finds it. 

Her new husband went before parole last week and I’m hoping he makes it. I love happy endings and will also be officiating their Vow Renewal upon his release and looking forward to seeing them both again. 

I had packed my make up kit but had no time to put on any make up other than lipstick which is why I wore my “no make up” tinted glasses. Time. I have so little of it. I live every moment and I love working. I love meeting new people and I love my job.

I now have 3 pairs of glasses for my “on the dash” days where lipstick and a smile are all I have time for. Makeup? Who has ten minutes for that? I know I didn’t. My bride and I said goodbye to her new husband and walked back to wait another hour near the metal detector. Why? Because the second bride and “other Officiant” were buying photos too and rather than print our photos first, the guard was back in the Visitation Area with the same camera and SD card. It would’ve been far more convenient (for us anyway) to print our photos first but, we wait patiently. 

My client and I would wait on the other bride who would come out to wait alone with my client and I on her own photos while the “other Officiant” stomped off and walked right out of Unit leaving her client to wait alone. I felt sad for her. Sitting alone and abandoned after waiting on that “other Officiant” she was now watching leave as my client and I waited with her on the wardens secretary to print out our photos first. 

Weddings aren’t a “drive through.” I was glad my client and I were there to keep the other bride entertained with some good company. 

Life Events aren’t “on the dash” and yet, arriving late and leaving early, the “other Officiants” behavior didn’t surprise me at all. Frankly, I’m used to it with this “other Officiant.” I always feel sorry for her clients. She doesn’t care about how important their “moment is.” She doesn’t take into consideration how long they’ve waited or what they went through to get to their wedding day. It’s a tragedy. 

I can only imagine how lonely a long drive to a Unit for a Prison wedding would be. Driving home after a Prison wedding without your new spouse by your side? Even lonelier.

I had wished the other bride was able to join my client and I to celebrate her wedding and take photos with us but, I can’t save everyone. 

My role is with my client. I must address the person standing in front of me although I’m old and wise enough to see how so many things that could make a day brighter for others would only take a moment of compassion, care or understanding if only the person they had hired would make more of an effort. Sigh. 

Driving to Tennessee Colony, I had seen an old building I wanted to use as our backdrop and my client followed me as the mist turned to rain. No matter. My hair was already a mess. 

I love how these photos turned out! My beauty and I braved the rain and had a great time together. My bride was a natural and I always try to find a unique background to give photos depth and this building was perfect. 

As we both wiped the rain off our faces and I changed signs and floral arrangements, I was so glad to have the opportunity to capture my clients joy on film. 

I had told the groom that I would send my beautiful bride double prints in order for him to have a set. God Bless this beautiful lady and as always, I’m honored to meet such incredible and resilient people who overcome any and all obstacles to make their relationship work. 

I’ve got jam packed few months ahead and wish all of my clients, friends and followers many minutes and moments of joy. They are out there ya all. Grab them. We are all on a short window. Tomorrow is but a promise.

Take a moment to smell the flowers or grab a coffee. Remember that clients are people too. They aren’t numbers. Put yourself in their shoes and I can assure you that you will make them feel as important as you would like to be treated yourself. My clients are worth it to me. They are the fabric of my life. 

Don’t forget to put your needs in the same order of importance as the people you care about. I’m hoping to find time to get my hair cut…

Posted on

Travel? I’ve Had My Share Because I’ve Been Everywhere…

This morning while dashing off to meet my gorgeous brides, my husband told me the “Stinky Skunk Scenario In Springtown” still hadn’t been solved. We’ve tried chlorine. We’ve tried Killz being painted. We’ve tried knocking down walls and replacing them. We’ve removed bathtubs. We’ve done everything at the “Stinky Skunk Development.” Not surprisingly, every idea has failed miserably. My husband’s latest idea is to put 6 ozone machines in the house. To date, the expense involved in trying to remove the smell is so far over 4K. The number continues to grow. Heavy sigh. 

Dealing with the stinky development has really upset my husband to no end. In fifty years of developing and building custom homes, my husband has never dealt with anything like this before. Only time will tell if this latest idea will work. A few months ago, our roof caved in. The insurance sent 6 Hepa machines to get the dust out of our home for the repairs to begin. I had assumed Hepa and Ozone to be the same machine. Apparently, they aren’t. 

Thanking my lucky stars that we no longer live in each development and subsequently move every two years anymore, I was anxious to make “a run for it from WorthamWorld” in order to miss morning traffic on my way to Tennessee Colony, Texas. A literal “City of Prisons.”

I know, ya all think Huntsville is the only city full of Prisons but, it isn’t. Tennessee Colony isn’t the only “other city of Prisons” either. Gatesville, Texas is “home of the female prison” city. I’m there frequently with male clients marrying females and female clients marrying female clients. 

While others were fighting the traffic to get to an office job, I was fighting traffic to get to my first prison. 

“Thank God for Toll Roads. I have no idea what I would do without them. Whether it costs me $100 a month to use the express or a thousand, they are worth every penny due to the amount of travel I do across Texas highways.”

Wendy M Wortham


TDCJ Coffield Unit is remarkably close to TDCJ Michael Unit. Convenient right? I thought so too. Close proximity Units are how and why I can “cover several Units in the same day.” Michael and Coffield are even behind the same guard gate meaning there was no need to drive out and re enter either Unit. I was cleared for both upon entry. 

My first bride, Blanca, had brought her mother and the grooms mother with her. You will hear me complain about photo quality at certain Units and wonder why? To better show you, I’m adding the photo from Coffield Unit with Blanca. 

There’s a reason I do my own photos. The reason is to give my clients an opportunity to celebrate and have clear photos of their wedding day. 

Sadly, I can’t take my own photos at Units and also, the inmate can’t leave so, Unit photos are a must have for clients whenever they are available for purchase at $3 each. I always buy at least 2. 

Blanca and I waited for a little over an hour to finally meet her fiancée who was hilarious. Seriously. He should be a stand up comedian. I’ve never laughed so hard while conducting a wedding before. Due to the wait to perform the wedding at Coffield and another wait for the photos to be printed, I left Blanca at Coffield to drive right over to Michael Unit and meet Bridget. 

Heading out of Coffield, I stopped to update both moms on what Blanca was doing and that I would meet them again after meeting Bridget at Michael Unit.

Arriving at Michael Unit, I checked in with Bridget and ran back to my SUV to grab the handwritten vows the groom had mailed me. Bridget went back to her car for quarters. 

The amount of walking I do at Prisons should have me losing weight I often think. However, a sonic corn dog and Diet Coke or other “road trip” snack items prevent me from getting skinny. Heavy sigh. 

While back at my SUV, I check in with my husband and Cindy who is busy in Weatherford with the twins, Maryssa and Makenna who were both “less than thrilled” about STAAR Testing today and tomorrow. 

The twins hate STAAR Testing but what student doesn’t? Maryssa is not nearly as driven as Makenna when it comes to stellar grades. 

In fact, Maryssa (below left) is social. Makenna (below right) has a meltdown if she doesn’t make A’s 100% of the time.

Little Madyson is loving speech therapy so much that she’s now talking in sentences which is a great leap from where she was only a few months ago. 

All three of my grandnieces are looking forward to getting ready for more adventure together this summer. Maddy loves Hurricane Harbor and the twins love not waking up at 5:30AM.  Stephaney is settling in to her new routine at home again and looking forward to finding work to keep her busy. 

Yesterday, I had a call from the Attorney General about Stephaney and how she wound up in Valdosta. I involved not only the DA but also the Sheriff’s Department and Attorney General to get Stephaney home. I’m also committed to preventing this from happening to anyone else. A poster wasn’t going to bring Stephaney home. Law enforcement did. 

It’s shocking to me that something like this “Valdosta situation” could happen to our family but, based on emails from readers, not uncommon. 

Families lose loved ones to mental illness and addiction everyday. The only difference between our family and the family members contacting me were that eventually families gave up. We didn’t. We threatened to for years.  Nearly seventeen years. It’s a very long time to deal with chaos. During that window, my twin sister developed hypertension and high blood pressure. During that nearly seventeen year window, my sister also had a heart attack. 

In the same nearly seventeen year window, I developed a lump in my breast that had to be removed and thyroid cancer in the same year. Two years later, precancerous lesions in my ovaries required a full hysterectomy. 

If you think dealing with a loved one who “has problems” won’t affect your health, you couldn’t be further from the truth. Ask me, I know. Ask Cindy. Stress can and does kill people. It hasn’t killed us but it’s because we are fighters. We smile to hide our pain. Cindy and I are resilient.Perhaps my twin sister and I were unwilling to give up on Steph? I don’t know but, I do know that trying to “fix Stephaney” has taken nearly 17 years of our life so far and when you invest that much time in something, it’s harder to walk away. Ask me, I know. 

For most of my life, I’ve never turned down an opportunity to travel. As a teen, I traveled Texas for Whataburger Commercials with Mel Tillis. 

Later, I went into print and commercial modeling. I never said no to an opportunity to see a new place. I loved adventure and being paid to travel made my life far more fun. I don’t mind living out of a suitcase and never have. I relish the adventure! 

I was a frequent flyer for the the better part of my life. At 9 years old, my son was also a frequent flyer. We traveled so much that the Admirals Club was as familiar as our own living room. 

I believe part of the reason I found a trip to Georgia appealing was that it would give Stephaney a chance to explore and get out of Texas. I didn’t see danger. I’ve never seen danger and I’ve traveled out of the country to Europe and Mexico with only a few hiccups in Mexico mainly due to driving the pink Jeep identifying myself as a tourist. 

I don’t drive Las Brisas Jeeps anymore and discourage anyone else from doing so either. 

However, having cash on hand to the people pulling us over claiming to be police officers in Acapulco was a great way to get yourself out of a sticky situation. 

While Cindy panicked, a couple fifty dollar bills got us back on the road “high tailing it” right back to our luxury resort and taxi cabs. Leave the driving to someone else abroad. It’s safer. 

Bridget was beautiful, bubbly and hilarious. I had so much fun with her that it was as if we had known each other all of our lives. 

Walking in to the Visitation Area, Bridget told me about how she had know Pip from years and years ago. In fact, they had met in school. Bridget hadn’t seen him in thirty years. 

I’m always fascinated by the back story because every client has one. These TDCJ Clients are warriors. How so? Because for one, I’m not sure if I went to Prison my husband would still be around and two, they make daily sacrifices to make their relationship work. Hence the term “warrior.” 

Today, I told my Coffield groom “you are lucky. She has been driving for hours and your mom as well as her mom came with her today.” He said “lucky? How so?” I said “you are lucky to have someone who loves you enough to sacrifice for expensive phone calls and long drives. You are lucky because you have someone who is resilient and has perseverance. There are people on the outside that cannot find anyone to commit to and they aren’t even in prison. Count your blessings and thank this woman because she went through a lot to stand before you here today.” Not surprisingly, he did. I’m honest. I’m blunt and I tell it like it is. 

Handing Pip his handwritten vows while he looked at his blushing bride, knowing they hadn’t seen each other in thirty years was a fascinating back story for me. I don’t even remember who I went to school with thirty years ago. 

I kept the handwritten vows to send to Bridget with her bridal photos as a wedding gift. I’m corny like that. Here are Bridget and Pip happily married at Michael Unit.Leaving Michael Unit with Bridget behind me, I called Blanca and met her at the Tennessee General Store. I had over 300 emails since last night and ignored them all. When I’m with a client, the best way to reach me is text or phone call. Sorry but, get in line. 

Blanca and her new mother in law and mother drove across the street to the Tennessee Colony Church for photos. Bridget met us there too. 

I had packed my usual array of fun stuff for photos and had a great time with both of my new brides. Bridget waited for me to get several fun shots with Blanca and her family before they headed back home. While going through my items, Makenna (one of the twins) sent a text. “MiMi, I think I really did great on my STAAR Test today.” 

I quickly told Bridget “it’s one of the twins, I need to answer her.” Bridget like all of my clients realize that my family and especially my grandnieces or twin sister are a part of my life and waited for me to not only answer Makenna but also take a call from one of my 7 Beto Brides regarding printing her Twogether In Texas Certificate. 

Thank you Bridget. You are an angel and I really appreciate your patience. Here’s my favorite photos from your photo shoot today. As soon as I can find time, we are going to go have that drink! Bridget had to get back to The Colony to take her daughter to work or I would’ve loved to grab a quick bite before heading back to Fort Worth. I decided to head to The Colony instead and check it out. 

But, time wasn’t on my side with a phone ringing off the hook in my SUV and a husband who still hadn’t solved the skunk infestation at his Springtown development. I’m suggesting baking soda and hydrogen peroxide next. Jeez, I will be relieved when this skunk situation resolves itself.

The Colony is actually near the airport and I’ve been by many times. I recognized The Dallas Market where I had modeled for years for so many different designers that I can’t even recall all of them. 

No, I don’t miss “those days.” Twenty to forty pound bags of shoes while pulling 1-4 racks of clothes in one day? I’m good. In fact, I was thrilled to drive by the Dallas Market to such an extent today that I sped up while doing so. 

No more being a hangar for me ya all! Those days are gone forever with half naked models being mean to each other and designers screaming “on the track and out of the racks.” 

I won’t miss any of the years I spent in dressing rooms and on catwalks. There isn’t any real glamour as you starve yourself to be the perfect sample size and are fighting the headaches your hungry stomach gives you. I did my time and I still own many amazing couture clothes that were never “given to me” as many believe. Nothing is free. I worked in exchange for nice clothing. I also bought and brought my own shoes. There is no free lunch. I used my designer clothing to obtain high end sales positions. You must look the part and I did. 

If you ever try to sell anything without having pride in your appearance, you will fail. I didn’t. I prepared. I created an amazing wardrobe by working very hard to get it for many years. No one buying from me ever knew this. They assumed that I was rich because I looked the part. From crocodile boots to fur coats and $2k silk suits, when you walked in to buy anything, you bought it from me. Not the wrinkled shirt wearing half bored salesman beside me. It’s the truth. I couldn’t afford beautiful clothes so I became a model and worked for beautiful clothes instead. Yep, I’m a pioneer. 

Driving to The Colony in the event Bridget had time to meet me, I pulled over to Texas Roadhouse for an appetizer and glass of wine and sent a text to Bridget. Moments later, I would realize they don’t open until 4PM during the week? On a busy access road? Surely they must be losing business? I will have to catch up with Bridget soon as she is equally busy too and a celebratory drink just wasn’t in the cards for either of us today. 

I’ve had a few questions about “action shots” on location. Leigh Ann loves getting action shots. She’s the only person on my team who is good at it. 

The photo of the groom jumping was also taken by Leigh Ann. I cannot do “action photography” very well I’m afraid. Here’s the pic.

“Why do you wear suits to Prisons and Vestments to other events?” Because vestments are “flowy.” I wear suits because wearing a poncho styled garment into a Unit wouldn’t be practical or within the dress code guidelines.

Thr Administrative Directive pertaining to the visitation dress code is specific about attire and especially oversized attire. Why? An open or flowing garment can hide many things that’s why. 

My Vestments are imported from Europe. Traditional Clients love choosing from a wide array of my many closets full of Vestments and suits. Last week, my TDCJ Holliday Unit bride was “shook down” due to her dress. Like a Vestment, it was flowy. Really oversized. I knew when she approached me that a shake down was coming and fully expected it. 

The Warden advised me of a “shake.” Knowing why a strip search would be warranted, I offered to join my client for a “strip down.” 

I’m adding the photos below to show you why I expected a strip search upon meeting my client in Huntsville. I.E. never question a Warden. I don’t and my clients don’t either. 

If you are asked to strip- do it it’s not a request. Quite the contrary, it’s a demand required to enter the Unit. 

The other “alternative” is to wear a cafeteria smock backwards. Effectively this “walk of shame” is the LAST RESORT for female clients so, I suggest being complacent and going along with the shake instead. 

Clothing is solely at the discretion of the Unit. The AD outlines attire but the Unit has the final call on what’s appropriate and what isn’t. Flowing or oversized clothing is prohibited. Generally, all clients send me photos of what they plan to wear. The TDCJ Holliday client (above) didn’t. 

“What percentage of your clients are LBGT” Well, off the top of my head and while being confused as to why this question is asked so frequently, the answer is 30-40% and that applies across the board. 

What this means is whether a client booked through Texas Twins Events, The Pawning Planners, TDCJ Officiant or even bought from Texas Twins Treasures, a large percentage of all of my clients are LBGT.

“What percentage of your clients are rednecks or hillbillies?” Well, this question wouldn’t even be being asked if a few people hadn’t seen my shotgun/Camo themed attire. Seriously, it wouldn’t. 

It’s actually not that unusual for clients to ask me to dress a certain way or “in theme.” I can’t count the number of times someone has asked me to dress as Elvis. 

But, the answer is less than 5% of our bookings are Pawning Planners Clients.  “Why are all of your clients so different?” Different to whom? Pawning Planners Clients have little or no money so they barter their event services. Texas Twins Events Clients are booking by paying. 

Venues I’m on staff at keep a percentage of my fee. Often the percentage is more than 50% but, worth it to me because the venue is a non profit and I believe enough in the non profit to forfeit a large percentage of my fee. 

I don’t HAVE to work. I choose to work. I enjoy working. TDCJ Clients are an extension of Texas Twins Events. I rebranded and expanded Texas Twins Events to include TDCJ Weddings. 

The answer to these “percentage questions”  is that we help ALL people from ALL backgrounds. From rich to poor and everywhere in between, no two clients are alike. 

The variety of our client bases raise eyebrows. We don’t care. Our clients don’t care either. Opinions of others will never have an impact on our client bases. 

In fact, I turn down at least 15-25 new requests for services each and every month all year long or move them to another date down the road. You can either choose someone else on my staff or find someone else to help you. There is only one of me. 

It’s not uncommon for clients to be so determined to book with us that THEY CHANGE THEIR EVENT DATE TO ACCOMMODATE MY SCHEDULE. 

I have never advertised and I’ve never needed to. I went into the event business to exceed expectations and based all of our fees on people over profit. I don’t have to work and can therefore “write my own ticket.” 

I don’t take every job because I don’t want to and also because the last thing I would ever do is spread myself too thin for my booked clients who are and always will be my first priority. I’m particular. I only work as a planner by referral. Period. Planning takes months of my time. MONTHS that can be spent addressing numerous other clients. 

Planning is a time consuming task. It’s not and never will be my first choice. I’ve been a planner for years and I’m excellent at it but, I can do 30-70 weddings in the time I spend “planning one.” Shocking right? It’s true. 

Cindy and I work together as twin event planners. Large events need a minimum of both of us. We enjoy working together. In fact, we are happiest when we are together.

Smaller events can get away with one planner but, we often work as a team to ensure that we are over staffed rather than under staffed. “I heard you on the radio and you’re a little salty regarding language now and then.” Hmm, well, I prefer to be real and honest than fake and dishonest. I grew up on Vandenburg AFB. My first word was most likely “salty.” 

Many of family members are active or retired military. I don’t apologize for a little “salty” language now and then. I work hard and I’m driven. I also am a very passionate person. Being “salty” gets my point across. No one expects it but, I’m frank. If I’m speaking salty to you, I’m probably annoyed or irritated to begin with or I’m so comfortable with you, I effectively let it all hang out. In general it’s one of the two aforementioned scenarios that my saltiness will “shine through.” Hopefully, it’s because in comfortable around you. 

If I use expletives now and then, don’t be offended by my doing so. I tell it like it is and occasionally, my family life isn’t always pretty. I’d rather say something than hold it inside. But, that’s just me. 

“Are you a Christian?” Yes. Absolutely. I was raised to praise numerous different religions. I’m a minister and not only believe in God but also in the power of prayer. My husband is also deeply religious. My entire family believe not only in God but more importantly in giving back. 

My faith has been tested throughout my lifetime but, my faith has held true through the good and the bad through the difficult and the easy.

I listen to a lot of old Gospel music as well as country, swamp music, classic rock and even classical music. Often, it’s Johnny Cash who will sing a line that perfectly sums up the way I’ve felt at one time or another in my lifetime. Cindy and I saw Johnny perform at a California prison at a very young age and it’s something that I will always remember vividly. 

When he walked out on that stage and said “hello, I’m Johnny Cash,” it was the simplest and yet the most powerful statement I had heard anyone make. As a child, I knew every lyric to the songs he sang with a touch of bitterness one minute that easily transformed to love, hope and promise in the next song. My go to music is Johnny Cash more often than not when driving to a Texas Prison. 

“If I gave you time to change my mind, I’d try to leave all the past behind. Knowing that you lied straight-faced while I cried. Still I look to find a reason to believe.”

Johnny Cash 

Throughout my lifetime, I’ve lost my faith on more than one occasion. My mother was a heroin addict. My grandfather was a child molester. My first husband beat me and my second husband was unfaithful. 

The best way out of a difficulty is through it.” – Will Rogers – 


At this stage of my life though, I’ve learned that God was never punishing me. Instead, God was preparing me. I would need faith and resilience. I would need strength and wisdom in my life. My hardships would teach me compassion and empathy. 

“Listen to the words written down when the man comes around. Whoever is unjust let him be unjust still. Whoever is righteous let him be righteous still. Whoever is filthy let him be filthy still.”

Johnny Cash

I live and work by a very high set of moral standards. My family does too. There are no grey areas with me. It’s cut and dry. Black or white. My clients are the family I wasn’t born with. They are all like my children. 

Long after a Clients event service, these former clients also become our friends. Their loyalty is also why I’ve never needed to advertise any of my businesses. Don’t be surprised, we earned our stellar reputation the hard way. 

Cindy would say “close the tent- there are far too many clowns in here again.” I don’t. I can’t control the clowns. 

I try to control the chaos but at the end of the day, my life is a unique combination of both my family and my business… 

The clowns of course are my family. Cindy doesn’t point that out because our readers already realize this… 

Posted on

Why Vow Renewals Are Not Offered At TDCJ Prison Units…

This evening after returning home from a long drive to Huntsville, Texas, I had a message through my FB Page, Texas Prison Weddings With Wendy Wortham regarding Vow Renewals. 

The Administrative Directive is specific pertaining to inmate marriages and a requirement on “wedding day” is a marriage license from the County Clerk as well as your state issued ID or passport. 

Because you cannot legally marry the same person twice, Vow Renewals are a popular way of celebrating your life together. 

However, since such ceremonies aren’t authorized by TDCJ, I came up with a new way to celebrate Clients anniversaries by having them print a Vow Renewal for their years together or if I’ve married the couple, providing one myself as a courtesy.

There are a number of sites with free downloads to say “I Do” all over again and, inmates are thrilled to receive these certificates in the mail. 

If you’d like to check out one of my favorite sites for free downloadable certificates, here’s the link– I Do Still Free Download Vow Renewal Certificate.

All you need is a computer and if you like, you can buy luxe paper to print on at Office Depot or other retailers. 

Congrats to all of my TDCJ Brides and Grooms on their upcoming anniversaries and looking forward to Vow Renewals for my previous clients who have finally made it through the storm and freedom. My team and I look forward to meeting ya all again at your celebrations this year.

I’m all over in March from Allred to Hobby to Stiles to Bridgeport to Coffield and numerous Units in Huntsville and Tennessee Colony. Mid month bookings have been moved to accommodate existing bookings that already have been assigned dates.

Due to my schedule, bookings are on a first come first book basis. If you are booking mid month, your wedding will be scheduled the following month. The timeline for Prison Wedding Planning is generally 4-6 weeks. 

The ID often takes up to 3 weeks on its own. The TDCJ ID will also need to be notarized. The Law Library at all Units is where the inmate will get the notary seal. You will also need an Absentee Affidavit which will also be notarized in the Law Library. Using both of these documents, you will purchase a marriage license. 

After the inmate has obtained notary seals of both the ID and the Absentee Affidavit, you will have him or her go back to the Law Library to file an I60 Request For Marriage Form. The I60 Form requires up to 6 signatures and your TDCJ Approved Officiant MUST be listed on it or it will NOT be APPROVED. 

Since the I60 Form requires so many signatures, it is passed from signee to signee. If a signer is on vacation or our sick, the form waits for them to return and sign it before passing it to the next signer. Because of this, there is no set timeline for a marriage ceremony to be Approved. The Warden is the last person to sign off on this document before passing it to the Chaplain who then contacts me to go over my availability before “setting” the date and time.

I require all clients to sign a contract. My reasons for this are that I almost never have met my TDCJ Clients in person until wedding day. Your behavior reflects on me as you are my client. Because of this, my TDCJ contract outlines all of the possible “no no” situations ahead of time. From what to wear to what you can or cannot bring to respectful behavior inside a Texas Prison as well as when to arrive, my contract covers all of the bases. This is key to us enjoying a worry free wedding day with no surprises. 

As my client, you will at no time be alone or without me by your side once we enter a Prison or Jail. Unless of course, you need to use the restroom. In such cases, I will wait for you outside the restroom. 

Most clients are nervous on wedding day because no one expected to be marrying at a Texas Prison. You will be okay. I will make sure of it. There will also be guards to escort us and the possibility of the Warden, Chaplain or both witnessing your ceremony. Focus on your fiancée and don’t be nervous. 

There is no open mouth kissing, groping or inappropriate contact allowed. You can hold hands, hug and kiss (closed mouth) at the end of your ceremony.

Certain Units allow a brief visit following the wedding ceremony of 10-20 minutes but, this varies from Unit to Unit. 

Certain Units offer photos of your Prison Wedding. Again, this varies from Unit to Unit. However, if photos are offered, I bring $6 in quarters and purchase 2 photos that I copy and mail clients as a courtesy. Clients can purchase up to 6 photos (if they are offered).

If you are marrying at a Death Row Unit, the circumstances are completely different than those mentioned above. Traditionally, the location is in the Visitation Area. However, Death Row Units often do not allow the inmate to leave the cell area. No photos are allowed in cell areas. Please be aware of this.

The ring issue continues to “come up.” However, the Administrative Directive specifically forbids the exchange of property to an inmate (Section K). 

As my client, I must insist that you DO NOT attempt to sneak anything into the Unit. Such behavior will suspend your marriage and your ability to visit.

Because I’m committed to giving you a worry free wedding day, I’m once again revisiting the wedding ring issue. But, only a special exception from the Warden can override this rule and in three years, I’ve never seen an exception made regarding a ring exchange. 

However, you can wear your ring in and hand it to me mid ceremony thus allowing the inmate to put it upon YOUR finger. If desired, I can also bless your ring as part of the ceremony. I’m happy to do so and love creative input from clients making their ceremony unique and memorable.

I strongly encourage all of my TDCJ Clients to write poetry, scripture, song lyrics or something you haven’t said before in order to make your ceremony as special as you are. By writing something yourself, you extend our time with your fiancée as certain Units only allow us to have the ceremony and then leave without the benefit of a brief visit. By writing things down and handing them to me prior to entry, I can hand them back to you and extend our visit by 5-10 minutes based on the length of your notes. 

Complimentary Bridal or Groom Photography is offered to all of my TDCJ Clients as a courtesy. I have a rolling photo booth of props, bouquets and more to bring fun to your photo shoot. I make double prints of photos as a courtesy so clients can send their new spouse copies.

Wedding dresses are RARELY allowed at Prison or Jail Weddings unless it’s a minimum security Unit. It’s so rare that a bride is allowed to wear a wedding dress that I’m pointing this out. 

However, if you wish to change clothes for your photo shoot with me, I encourage you to bring your dress with you. 

Visitation Attire is expected at your Prison Wedding. Please do not wear tight or revealing clothing. The last thing you want is to be handed a cafeteria smock. It’s happened and it always breaks my heart. I don’t want my brides crying on wedding day so, I strongly discourage anything that might be deemed “risqué.” The Unit has the final call on Attire. 

While guests are rarely allowed at maximum security Units and especially, Death Row Units, occasionally at minimum security Units such as Estes, the guest exception has been granted but, it’s only ever happened at Estes.

If you’d like to bring friends or relatives, I encourage you to because it makes your drive far more pleasant and because they are welcome to join you in photos after we leave the Unit.

Laying Out. What is it and what does it mean? I ask all TDCJ Clients to have the inmate lay out the day prior to the wedding. My reasons for this are that if the inmate is in class or working on wedding day, it’s difficult for staff to locate them on the premises. It’s not uncommon to wait up to 3 hours for a Unit to find the inmate. If the inmate has laid out, they stay in their cell and are easy to locate and move to the Visitation Area. 

You cannot bring a change of clothes for the inmate. This rule is also specifically addressed in the Administrative Directive under “offender property.” I know you’d like your loved one to wear something other than state issued attire but, we cannot change the rules. 

Please do not drink PRIOR to your Prison Wedding or bring anything onto the property that shouldn’t be there. Leave mace, wasp spray and other similar items at home. Your car may very well be searched and the last thing you need on your wedding day is a problem with something in your vehicle. Even if you own a firearm and are licensed to carry it, you CANNOT under ANY circumstances bring a firearm or cell phone into a Prison Unit. 

By knowing what to expect at your Prison Wedding, I’m hoping it makes your day seamless and as close to perfect as we can get it. Please arrive at least 15 minutes prior to your scheduled wedding time to allow a search entering the Unit. 

If you wear a wire bra, corset or other lingerie with metal, you may be asked to go to the bathroom for a private screening. Please be courteous to staff during this process. The guards are following protocol and it will always be a female or if you are a male, a male guard conducting a private search.

Your hands and feet will also be screened. Because of this, I can help you remove your shoes but once cleared, I cannot assist you putting your shoes back on. There are generally benches or seating available to give you a place to sit and put your shoes back on.

Please be aware that expired ID will not be accepted to enter a TDCJ Facility. If your ID is soon to expire, I strongly encourage you to replace it. Passports are accepted as ID as well as state issued drivers licenses.

I always ask clients if they wish for me to file their marriage license? There are valid reasons for this. First, marriage licenses have a shelf life. Once signed by me, they must be filed within 30 days. If you wish to file your license in person on your own, PLEASE do so quickly. If you’ve lost your license, contact me immediately and visit the clerks office as I will need to sign a duplicate. 

It’s best to allow me to file your license as I file them on Monday, Wednesday and Friday every week. If your license is from a clerk more than one hour from my location in Fort Worth, Texas, I mail it Certified/Return Receipt in order to track it and ensure it arrived timely and safely to the clerks office. 

If you have any other questions, comments or concerns not addressed in today’s blog, you can email me directly wendy@texastwinsevents.com I answer emails every 1-2 hours. 

Many clients and prospects are messaging me on Instagram (wendywortham) or FB. My FB page alerts me to new messages while Instagram does not if you aren’t following me or I’m not following you, Instagram “hides” your message. Because of this issue, a delay in my responding to you might occur. Please email me or call me (682-229-6838) if you have messaged me on Instagram and more than a few hours have elapsed. My clients are important to me and a priority. The last thing I want is for someone to assume that I’ve overlooked them or weren’t addressing their needs immediately.

I’m inside Units Monday through Friday or traveling to Prisons or Jails. If I don’t answer your call immediately, I assure you as soon as I get back in my vehicle, I will. 

Weekends are workdays for me too as I own Texas Twins Events, Texas Twins Treasures and The Pawning Planners as well as work at numerous DFW based venues I’m on staff at. If you are contacting me on a weekend or evening, I may be working and occasionally, my twin sister, Cindy will field calls and take messages for me.

Responding to all inquiries is important to myself and my staff. Exceeding our clients expectations will always be a priority to us.