Category: Business And Family

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“Is The Nightmare Really Black Or Are The Windows Painted?” Elton John

For two months now I’ve waited and hoped for good news while praying that this virus would leave as quickly as it came. I’m not alone. The news is so depressing these days.

From anxiety to depression Covid-19 has set the world on edge. For inmates the fear of dying is valid. For loved ones of inmates worry and concern go hand in hand.

There isn’t any good news these days. Gloom and Doom fill the internet, news and media.

Finding hope amidst hopelessness is no easy task. In fact it’s similar to searching for a needle in a haystack.

My hometown of Lompoc, California is saturated with Covid cases. The COVID-19 time bomb ticking inside the Lompoc prison complex since late March detonated in dramatic fashion this week as the federal facility confirmed 912 open cases among inmates and 25 cases among staff. The outbreak remains the largest in any federal prison in the United States.

The rest of Santa Barbara County has reported 475 total positive cases.

My sister, Tammy called me alarmed, worried and concerned about filing for unemployment. It’s something neither I or my sisters have ever done before.

Tammy has worked at an upscale restaurant in Buelton since she was 19 years old. Everyone in our family learned the value of working at a very young age. We didn’t have anyone to “fall back on.” Instead we had each other and strong work ethics.

There are three things that I remember most about Lompoc every time I roll into town, the prison, the base and the flowers. Lompoc is known as the valley of the flowers. Tammy never left Lompoc.

Many of our relatives stayed in Lompoc but Cindy and I had no real choice about leaving. Our mothers mother adopted Tammy.

Our father loaded up Cindy, Jerry and I and left our hometown and everything familiar to us behind.

I thrive on structure and predictability. My reasons are based entirely on my childhood. Nothing was predictable. Bounced from relative to relative my siblings and I were often unaware of where we would be from one day to the next.

Cindy has stayed in the same house for nearly twenty five years so her daughters and granddaughters could attend the same schools. Structure is important to her too.

My son attended private school so moving wouldn’t change his structure. I drove him thirty minutes to an hour away until he was able and old enough to drive himself.

I wanted my son to go to school with the same friends. Predictability and structure during his school years were very important to me. Being the mother I didn’t have was never easy or inexpensive but worth my effort and attention.

I wanted predictability for my child I had never had for myself. Cindy and I both shared the same importance of stability for our children that we had never had as children ourselves.

Cindy and I broke the chains of our broken childhood. We changed the outcome for our own children and grandchildren. We gave them the childhood we would have wanted for ourselves. It was entirely a joint decision.

Cindy and I have both raised our children and grandchildren together.

Mothers Day is always a hardship for me. It’s a day of gloom and doom even in the best of times. I can never understand why our mother made the decisions she did.

Further I cannot under any circumstances send a sappy card about what a wonderful mother she was. None of my mothers children can. We struggle through every Mother’s Day fighting to remain positive. Pretending we have a normal family. Knowing we don’t. We never have. We never will.

Our mother broke our family. She exposed all three of her daughters to predators. Addicts and “friends” of hers who took advantage of her children often right in front of her. We had no one to protect us. We had no one who cared enough to step up or step in.

My depression each and every Mother’s Day occasionally takes me several days to put away.

Posts from happy families celebrating their mother. Internet “tips” for making this Mother’s Day perfect for your mother. The best way to treat your mother to a wonderful holiday based entirely on the sacrifices she made for her children. Ugh.

Cindy and I switched up this Mother’s Day ooh la la stuff when our children were old enough to realize we prefer to treat it like any other day and treat our kids to lunch and a movie or a trip to the casino. Our older kids are in their 30’s.

Cindy’s twin grand daughters often buy gifts for her and I while shopping with my husband or their Papa. They don’t understand why Mother’s Day is a dark day for us.

The twins don’t know why their MiMi’s dread the yearly phone call to our mother to wish her a happy Mother’s Day while secretly wondering why we continue to keep up this “faux celebration” of a day that reminds us over and over again that we never had a real mother. We never will.

Monday while scrolling FB and waiting on the police to report my fathers truck stolen, I saw a post from Naquitia about Mother’s Day that grabbed my attention. She was hurt that her children hadn’t bothered to do anything for Mother’s Day. I was relieved my son hadn’t. Why rub it in? The day of the year that kicks off my yearly reminder of having absent parents is Mother’s Day.

Don’t even get me started on Father’s Day. Ugh from the frying pan straight over to the fire. Tit for tat. “You wouldn’t be where you are without me.” Really? I’m where I am because I learned that in order to keep from starving I would need to work my ass off. I don’t “owe” anybody. I’m well off and live comfortably. I don’t have to work. No one gave me financial security. I earned it.

By the time I slap myself together enough to put Mother’s Day behind me it’s Father’s Day. You get the point.

Anyway, I’ve been driving by my dads house for two years. What am I looking for? Broken windows. Signs of an intruder. The usual. I had driven past when I noticed his truck was missing. Ugh. Now I had to have a conversation with my dad BEFORE Father’s Day to “update him that the truck was missing.”

My father and I have a very strained relationship. My father never forgave me for hiring an investigator to locate my mother in my 20’s.

In fact most of my fathers side of the family and even my brother were angered about it.

I wanted answers. I really wanted an apology. I got neither. The same day my mother met me in exchange for $1500 she was in a debilitating car accident that she would never recover from.

I was so shocked by my meeting with her that I lost the opportunity to tell her what a shit she was. Why couldn’t she lie and say she was sorry or that she wondered what had happened to us? Why couldn’t I express my anger? I was dumb struck at her cold responses while she counted my money.

I would never have the opportunity to “say what I really think” to my mother. She has no memory of what she put her four children through. I believe she knows more than she lets on but challenging this fact would upset my sisters and our already fragile faux normal family. I zip it instead.

My sisters and I pretend normality around our mother. It’s strained, awkward and always emotionally debilitating.

My friend and prison bride, Naquitia had written on her FB wall “my kids don’t even know what day this is.”

I was immediately struck by her post for a few reasons. First, her kids should know what day it is the older ones at least and second I was busy trying to forget Mother’s Day.

I commented on the post and advised her that Cindy and I try to forget Mother’s Day every year.

Her response touched me though. “If I had a husband at home, he would be taking these kids to buy me gifts and teaching them to celebrate me.”

It’s something I had never really put much thought into but she was right. My prison clients in numerous states are often alone on Mother’s Day. Those who aren’t are often forgotten by their children.

Another prison bride sent me a message on FB that read “my son isn’t talking to me it’s been six months. What can I do? My heart is broken.” Karen like many mothers would like to mend this rift but her son doesn’t approve of her plans to marry an inmate. I suggested sending her son a card or letter expressing her love for him while acknowledging that she must make her own decisions when it comes to choosing a life partner.

I have no idea how this will turn out for Karen but I firmly believe in the power of communicating your feelings unless of course you are me and my sisters. We communicate our feelings to each other and skip our parents.

When Cindy’s husband was home and Leigh Ann and Stephaney we’re younger, Steve took them shopping for Cindy to celebrate Mother’s Day.

When my son was still living at home, Matthew not only took him to shop for a Mother’s Day gift but even got a card from my dog, Foxy lord rest his soul. I’ve missed Foxy so much during this pandemic. He would have loved having me home.

I decided to send Naquitia some fabric. She’s an excellent seamstress and I knew she would enjoy some of our LV fabric to make masks. She did. She also sent me a photo wearing the mask she had used my material to create.

Naquitia is a good friend. All of my clients are. They are amazing, resilient and sadly, alone. Separated from their loved ones by prison walls. Sending the fabric to Naquitia, I decided to send a few of our custom masks to a few of my prison clients who had messaged me regarding being miserable on Mother’s Day themselves. Better late than never. If their kids wouldn’t celebrate them I would.

The inability to visit their loved ones along with the worry that their loved ones will become sick with Covid spreading through the prison system keeps fear and hopelessness at an all time high.

My clients have resilience, strength, patience and perseverance. They have also taught me to focus on other mothers on Mother’s Day rather than my own. It’s taken me 55 years to get past hating Mother’s Day but my clients have.

The police finally arrived at my dads house to take the stolen truck report and logged off FB to begin going over the details.

Google images showed that the truck had been parked exactly where I had last seen it and tread marks appear to have been from a trailer hauling it off.

The truck had sat there for five years. Flat tires and all. Who would steal it?

Someone was unaware that I regularly drive by and would notice it was missing.

Three months ago my sister and I hired a tow truck to move my dads other car a Mitsubishi Galant to her home until we could find an international carrier to move it to our brothers home in Monroe, North Carolina. It’s expensive to move vehicles ya all.

The policeman needed my dads date of birth. Ugh. I have no idea of my dads date of birth. I called my sister in law, Michelle who knew it.

I have no idea what my mothers birthday is either. I know my parents were both 21 when Cindy and I were born. We’ve never celebrated our parents birthdays. They’ve never celebrated ours.

I’ve never had a birthday gift from anyone in my family in my entire life. Cindy hasn’t either. For many years after locating my mother that fateful day in California and wishing I hadn’t, the benefit of meeting my mothers mother who never forgot my birthday or Christmas and even my sons birthday was the sheer delight of finding a greeting card in my mailbox.

When the cards stopped coming I knew that grandma Tinney had passed on. No birthday card in November no Christmas card in December. I called Lompoc and confirmed that grandma Tinney was gone.

The only person in my entire life who bothered to send a birthday and Christmas card every year to not only me but also my sister Cindy and her daughters. You remember things that you never had. You are thankful for them too.

Father’s Day is right around the corner. There are 3 days I intentionally overlook every year. My birthday, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. I’ve decided to start focusing on others instead. It’s a good place to start.

My clients are the family I never had but was gifted with instead. They bring me joy. They call to check on me during this pandemic. They are amazing.

While I continue to hope and pray this virus finally leaves the prison system and the former structure of my life can be restored, I’m hopeful that Father’s Day this year will be different for me. My son is a new father. I’m a new grandmother. I have many things in my life to be thankful for. I will focus on moving beyond my anxiety of going down the card aisle with others buying sappy cards for their parents and buy a sappy card for my son and his wife or my clients.

I will work on accepting that not having parents in my life made me a better person. A kinder person. A compassionate person. The things in my life I didn’t have never defined me. I became the person I wanted to meet. The mother I never had. The father my son needed. I was capable of far more.

You don’t need parents in your life to be a good parent. You need patience, love and understanding…

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Homebound And Feeling Down? You Aren’t Alone…

My entire adult life has been built around structure. I’ve always had a schedule. I don’t anymore.

My “new normal” consists of going outside to take out the trash these days and making a run for it if one of my neighbors happens to be doing the same thing at the same time or meeting clients and staying in my suv. It’s odd to not walk into a venue or a unit. It’s odd to change so much so quickly.

Social distancing has affected anyone who takes this virus seriously. For others who don’t, they eventually do when their job shuts down or their city is locked down by a safety in place order.

Due to the number of requests for drive by ceremonies, I’ve updated my site pages… Texas Twins Events I cannot and will not “just sign a license.” I will conduct a ceremony regardless of how brief PRIOR to signing your license.

Changes to how, where and when people are now getting married by car are shocking but occurring with regularity during this virus window.

Suddenly being stuck at home and unprepared for the possibility has caught a number of folks with their pants down. People who didn’t know how to cook are learning. People with limited food at home are “winging it” with wild recipes of items they have on hand.

I miss seeing my grandson the past 2 weeks. I miss my clients, my structure, my predictability and my family. I miss the way things “used to be.” But, this is temporary. Self quarantine protects all of us. It’s inconvenient but it’s essential.

My twin sister summed up this unexpected virus to me while I was sadly calling 9 clients last week to advise them that their event had been cancelled.

These clients had been scheduled at 4 TDCJ Units, 2 FBOP facilities 1 ICE Detention Center and 1 county jail and were excitedly looking forward to a wedding they had waited months to have.

Cindy summed up the situation better than I could have (as usual).

“YOU will no longer FEAR the STORM, once you’ve SURVIVED the DROUGHT”

Cindy literally has a flair for iconic and memorable quotes that I’ve never had.

Yesterday, I reviewed a DM from a Linda who wanted to know if I “had heard about Harvey Weinstein?” I follow prison news and legal news closely and ironically had told my husband weeks ago “they are taking him to Bellevue.” Matthew wanted to know the outcome of a very public and sensational trial. I had tuned in at odd times to follow this trial.

While awaiting sentencing, Weinstein was kept at Rikers.

Rikers Island is among the world’s largest jails – it is perched on a 413 acre island between Queens and the Bronx and holds about 7,000 inmates, down from more than 20,000 at its peak in the 1990s.

The majority (85%) of detainees at Rikers Island are pretrial defendants, either held on bail or remanded in custody. The rest of the population have been convicted and are serving short sentences.

As early as February, Bellevue had reported cases of Coronavirus. But the main story that most of us will remember is the death of Kobe not the outbreak of a virus sweeping through New York.

Obviously, Weinstein wasn’t sick during the trial or showing signs of illness.

How do I know? From catching glimpses of the trial. No one was coughing or showing signs of difficulty breathing. That trial was charged with emotion but without visible signs of illness.

Meanwhile at Bellevue, more cases surfaced not only there but at other hospitals as well.

Because Weinstein had suffered a mild heart attack, he was sent to Bellevue for an angioplasty procedure.

There weren’t any reports of Coronavirus at Rikers until after Weinstein having that angioplasty. Think about it.

My observation of the widespread and unheard of transmissions of the Coronavirus at Rikers took me a moment to try and understand why or how the virus had come to get into Rikers.

Was it a guard? A weekend visitor? Or was it Weinstein returning to custody from Bellevue? Could his nurse or treatment team at Bellevue have inadvertently transferred the virus to Weinstein it was it a hard surface that Weinstein came in contact with? Hospitals are riddled with germs as are prisons.

Many posts regarding Weinstein becoming infected with the Coronavirus run from “he deserved it” to “that’s great.” Focus on where he’s been and who has been around him ya all.

What these folks are missing here is the number of people who have been within 6 feet of Weinstein.

Regardless of your feelings about HIM what about THEM?

Attorneys, correctional officers, hospital staff, I could go on and on here. Reporters within close proximity are and have been equally “exposed.”

Someone else had commented on yet another post regarding Rikers being overrun by the virus. Another “who cares?” Well, for people this narrow minded and unconcerned about inmates, it should be noted that the inmates family care.

The correctional officers and their families care too.

Do these people posting hateful comments realize the number of people who work within the criminal justice system prior to making idiotic public remarks? No. Because they don’t love an inmate or an officer. They don’t care about inmates. But there are millions of people who do care about inmates.

There are families who care about a loved one working at a facility overrun with a deadly virus too.

Prisons have millions of visitors on weekends throughout the U.S. But if we look at where this virus is running rampantly through the criminal justice system, it isn’t affecting any state as much as New York. Why? Rikers and Bellevue? The airport? A city that’s a literal hub for international travel? Public transportation? Cabs? Ubers? Drivers from the network? Hotels? Airplanes?

Could it be because Weinstein literally “brought the Coronavirus into Rikers from Bellevue? It is a possibility. Or was an officer already infected and transporting Weinstein from court to Rikers or from Bellevue to Rikers? Was he already infected during the trial? He didn’t appear to be but if the incubation period is two weeks the possibility of him being ill at some point are possible.

Rikers is now releasing inmates at an alarming pace. Were these other inmates exposed? We may never know but the possibility exists.

Other correctional facilities are following Rikers lead. They too want to thin the numbers of inmates. This has never occurred within the criminal justice system before. TDCJ will not follow the lead of others and neither is CDCR although many are pressuring early releases. CDCR may very well start releasing older inmates or inmates with health issues due to the number of people pressuring them to do so but pressure won’t affect TDCJ. This is Texas and Texas is being proactive rather than reactive.

Ironically, the Fort Worth PD announced publicly that they won’t arrest Class C suspects. They don’t want to bring anything into the jails. But does this announcement encourage criminal behavior? Maybe. In Texas, most citizens are armed and in a position to protect their home and property. Texans are preparers by nature. Most know how to hunt and fish. Parents and grandparents teach kids gun safety at a young age. I was one of those kids. My uncle handed me a rifle at about ten years old. I don’t like guns and never have but I know how to use one and my husband has taken me to driving ranges for years to keep me aware of the possibility of one day needing to use a gun to protect myself. I hope that day never comes.

How did the virus get to Bellevue? A woman returning from abroad flew into Newark and then went to Bellevue. Did Bellevue already have the virus? Maybe. Was it a possibility? Absolutely.

  • No one took this Coronavirus seriously until they were forced to do so. Including me. I viewed this virus as I did the flu which affects and kills people every year.
  • I’m OCD and to people around me known as a germ freak. Those months spent volunteering at the nursing home taught me to be aware of germs and the transmission of germs. I’ve never forgotten what I learned about sterilization at that nursing home.
  • Why? At 15 years old I was volunteering at a nursing home for a health class to attempt to go into the nursing profession.
  • At a very young age, I learned about germs. Nurses and personnel warned me about infection and transmission.
  • Although I chose another path in my career, I’ve never forgotten how fragile seniors are and how easily germs can spread through a nursing home. Prisons are equally vulnerable as are hospitals.
  • I began officiating inmate weddings in California years ago prior to other states including Texas, I followed the same stringent guidelines about sanitizing my hands prior to entering and after leaving a Unit.
  • I also had advised my PCP that I would be going into prisons and needed booster immunizations in order to protect my clients, the facility staff, myself and the inmates.
  • When my twin sister, Cindy and niece, Leigh Ann began officiating inmate ceremonies, they followed the same regimen of doing whatever they could to stay healthy and immunized. Why? Because the importance of being vigilant is to protect not only ourselves but also those around us.
  • I had an inquisitive phone call about a post on my FB page, Prison Weddings With Wendy Wortham after posting my observations regarding Rikers. It was a reporter. She had read my post regarding Rikers and Bellevue.
  • Why no one else saw or noticed the same things I did I have no idea. I love a mystery. I love trying to figure out what happened or will happen. With the Coronavirus, no one could have anticipated what has happened. No one.
  • While the media reported that Weinstein “tested positive,” what they didn’t do was attempt to find out how.
  • My self imposed isolation began last Monday. I’ve continued to stay in touch with clients, Units and my family. I’ve officiated two drive through funerals. Shocking yes but I’ve also had a flood of people contacting me because their “other officiant” effectively bailed on them.
  • Fear flops two ways. While vendors are upset about cancellations, customers are now getting cancelled by their vendor? This trend during wedding season has never occurred before.
  • BUT I can’t save everyone. I have to put my booked clients first which is why I’m not taking on new or short notice bookings. Why? Because I currently have a month of rescheduled events already. These clients are my priority.
  • “You must turn your back on the choir to focus on the congregation.”
  • My twin sister famously told me this at a wedding years ago. The couple were the congregation. Their families were the choir. Cindy and her iconic quotes are honest, raw and real.
  • Anyone contacting me with a full plate of clients awaiting reschedules is effectively the choir. I have an existing congregation.
  • The reporter contacting me wanted a Zoom conference. I prefer Skype and use it frequently for production companies and media interviews. Nonetheless and anyhow, I downloaded Zoom and attempted to “fix myself up.” What do I mean by that folks? Well my quarantine clothing consists of daytime pajamas and nighttime pajamas which obviously aren’t appropriate for a video conference call.
  • My husband asked “why are you putting on makeup? You aren’t going anywhere are you?”
  • The safety of officiating ceremonies from my car and limiting my interaction with mourners, clients and guests is and will be odd. Mobile weddings and funerals are unheard of but fast becoming a reality. Social distancing is a learning curve.
  • I miss the intimacy of hugging clients to celebrate their wedding or posing for wedding photos. I miss the intimacy of shaking hands and sharing my sorrow at a memorial. I can currently no longer perform baptisms. Social distancing and stringent guidelines to protect the transmission of this virus have literally changed the way I live.
  • All of my clients are upset about changes. From visitation revocation to rescheduled events, no one is happy about the current changes set forth to prevent the transmission of this virus. We are all “adapting.” We have no choice.
  • Rikers and Wende now have the Coronavirus.
  • Cindy and I had flown into Newark last August to film with Mel Robbins. Cindy and Wendy both sanitized our entire areas on the plane with antibacterial wipes while fellow passengers stared at us. Cindy and Wendy fly a lot and learned years ago that every time we got off a plane we got sick. We changed that by being OCD. We no longer get sick flying and the reason we dont is over precaution.
  • Leigh Ann had flown into JFK. Our travel coordinator couldn’t put us at the same airport which wasn’t an issue as the driver for Leigh Ann took her to the same hotel our driver did.
  • Our first night in New York would be the first time my twin had chest pains. It would be our first inkling of a problem too. Irony has many faces.
  • On one hand, we had a set of Texas Twins who have never not honored a commit in their lives. On the other hand, my sister had a health issue that had surfaced. Cindy wouldn’t go to the hospital in New York because “we must be on the set. I will go to a doctor back home.”
  • Leaving New York at Newark Airport, I as usual had antibacterial wipes. In fact, every time we got into a car with our driver, I wiped down the areas. My sister was having chest pains. I went and bought a bottle of aspirin and bottle of water. I was terrified Cindy would have a heart attack returning to DFW. But, she didn’t and she didn’t because I bought those aspirin.
  • Back in DFW, my twin was diagnosed with angina. I was determined to find out why.
  • Admitted and discharged from Harris with this cryptic diagnosis. I demanded a prescription for nitroglycerin. Why? Because I had researched angina.
  • In a matter of days the nitroglycerin would save my sister from a major heart attack. In a matter of months, my sister would undergo an angioplasty just like Weinstein. But the nitroglycerin and aspirin while waiting on a referral for a cardiologist are why my sister survived.
  • We were waiting on that referral while Cindy was a passenger in my suv running from Unit to Unit across Texas and driving her daughter, Stephaney to treatment in Oklahoma.
  • The stress of “another inpatient stint” for Stephaney didn’t help Cindys stress level or angina discomfort.
  • I took Cindy to Harris in Willow Park and my twin was finally transferred to the Heart Ward for an angioplasty. The referral from our PCP came while she was at Harris still recovering.
  • You can imagine after going through all of this to get my sister proper treatment why I wondered how Weinstein “got right in” and “got that angioplasty.”
  • For people on the outside, getting a cardiologist and getting an angioplasty are far more difficult. Why do you think there are so many heart attacks in America?
  • A number of people are saying “Weinstein got what he deserved.” But, what about the personnel at the Unit? What about other inmates? What about the visitors to Rikers? What about the families of personnel and visitors? This isn’t so much about Weinstein as it is throwing a rock in the pond. The rock leaves ripples.
  • As Units across the country consider releasing inmates, Rikers is releasing more than anyone else.
  • Are these inmates infected? Who knows but they are out and they are out after being exposed. Think about it.
  • Wende now has two cases with one of them being Weinstein. Will there be others at Wende? Are there already?
  • Weinstein will be housed in Wende for his entire classification process, a Department of Corrections spokesperson said.

    • “There is no standard time frame for this process, as it varies based on the individual’s programmatic, medical and other needs,” the rep said.

  • How many correctional officers have been within 6 feet of Weinstein? How many people have been near him? It’s a question that may never be answered but needs to be considered….
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    Back At TDCJ Beto Unit & Big Surprises At TDCJ Units Revoking Visitation & Rescheduling Of Confirmed Dates…

    Monday while traveling from the Tarrant County Clerks Office to Parker and Palo Pinto Jails, my husband send me a text that read “buy toilet paper we are out.”

    This wasn’t an unusual request from my husband as I had left with a list of weekly items that I normally buy and stock once a week.

    I do not buy toilet paper every week because there are only two of us at our home and we don’t need or warrant more than 4-6 rolls at a time. But, this simple request would become extraordinarily difficult to find for me.

    Welcome to the toilet paper controversy with hilarious memes and people laughing at others buying toilet paper this past Monday.

    By Friday, the people laughing weren’t laughing.

    By Friday people in small town Weatherford were getting into fist fights over Charmin.

    By Friday I had seen the world change before my eyes. Hoarding and flipping hand sanitizer for $100 on eBay? I’ve seen it.

    Toilet paper for $20 a roll on FB Marketplace? I’ve seen it. People buying all of the cold medicine, alcohol, hand sanitizer and wipes as well as canned food items, sugar, meat and food while wiping out supplies for anyone else? I’ve seen it.

    I’ve seen some of the wildest scenarios in four days that I could ever imagine. I wish I hadn’t but I have.

    On Friday, Cindy and I took a break between clients to go to Walmart. Shelves were empty. Baskets over turned by angry customers left lying on their sides. Ransacked shelves empty greeted shoppers who didn’t expect this type of “mission” to buy toilet paper or anything else for that matter.

    Cindy and I left Walmart and headed to Dollar Tree. No toilet paper. No hand sanitizer. No bottled water.

    We then drove to Dollar General and found alcohol for the injections my husband gives me at home because going to the doctor once a week with my schedule isn’t convenient. The alcohol was 50% rather than 70% but it was better than nothing. We also found 2 packs of 4 roll toilet paper. There were only 2 packs of 4 roll TP in the store.

    We then left Dollar General and went to Albertsons. Still no hand sanitizer. There was coffee and cream and bread as well as eggs. The panic that would arrive a few days later hadn’t “hit yet.”

    I bought cantaloupe, watermelon, broccoli and my usual staple items including coffee and cream as well as salmon and chicken breasts and a few cans of soup.

    Had I known that there would be food shortages for my Sunday or Monday shopping depending on my schedule, I might have bought a few cans of soup more, some rice and even some beans or ramen noodles but, hindsight is 20/20.

    Monday prior to the hysteria and hoarding going on around me, I arrived home and prepared my suv for the drive to Beto Unit in Tennessee Colony on Tuesday to meet my bride. I had loaded furs, bouquets, hats and fun items from my Texas Twins Inventory and planned a leisurely drive to Beto Unit.

    Tuesday, I stopped in Corsicana to visit the Walmart and buy my new grandson the diapers and wipes since I couldn’t find at Cindy’s Walmart Monday.

    I would have a few problems finding either the diapers or the water wipes my daughter in law prefers in Corsicana.

    There weren’t people agitated racing down the aisles. There was bottled water. There wasn’t hand sanitizer or toilet paper, baby wipes or paper towels.

    I needed a few rolls of paper towels but decided I could wing it if I had to by using my tea towels at home.

    By Tuesday I still wasn’t alarmed. A few things were difficult to come by depending on where you went while others weren’t. No mass hysteria just YET.

    I left Corsicana Walmart and headed to Tennessee Colony/Palestine Texas to meet my client at Beto.

    While driving there, a herd of wild hogs came running across the 2 lane road with cars traveling 70-80 miles an hour. I saw the “hub bub” about half a mile ahead and slowed down thinking it was deer or elk.

    On closer inspection, it was something I had never encountered on the 300,000 miles I have driven getting to Units in Texas.

    Wild hogs? They were huge and could easily flip a car as their girth is low to the ground. I tip toed my way around the herd and traveled on wondering where they had come from and if a driver not paying attention wouldnt slow down until it was too late?

    Arriving at Beto, I find my bride in the parking lot. We walk in together. She’s thrilled. Her smile shows her joy. We clear in and wait on the chaplain.

    We walk to the traditional photo wall at Beto and it’s coveted with Coronavirus signs.

    Frankly, I don’t want to use the wall and have my clients photo peppered with Coronavirus signs on wedding day. I request using the tropical wall in the vending machine area instead and we are granted the privilege to do so.

    Leaving the Unit, my bride follows me to an old church just outside Palestine. I begin unloading and finding my favorite areas based on lighting and background. We are laughing and having a great time together. I hand her a bottle of water from my trunk and we spend a few minutes trying different areas and have fun celebrating her marriage.

    I love my job. We hug and say goodbye as I head to Dallas North Tower to meet my next client.

    Cutting through Tennessee Colony, I’m leery about another encounter with those wild hogs I saw a few hours earlier. My fear is confirmed when I see a hog on the side of the road outside of Cayuga, Texas. Someone wasn’t paying attention.

    Backroads in Texas give you a wide variety of surprises such as deer, elk, possums and armadillos which can jump straight off the ground four feet right into your grill. Wild hog herds though were a new one for me.

    Cautiously driving towards Corsicana aware that something else could jump out on the road, I’m unaware of the widespread panic spreading across America.

    I take calls from clients and Units. I check in with my husband and let my son and daughter in law know I will drop off diapers and other supplies I’ve found to them in the morning. I’m not worried about baby wipes because I assume I can find them. I will later realize I can’t.

    By the time I leave North Tower in Dallas, a phone call from my niece at Point Hueneme, California regarding “people fighting over toilet paper and water.” This IS DISTURBING. Toilet paper?

    Leigh Ann is frightened. People at the military base are no longer touching and running her ID. Instead, they are now simply looking at it.

    People are acting differently. Leigh Ann plans to go to Ventura and try to find bottled water. I advise her to wait until her husband comes back from work since her 4 year old, Madyson is a handful.

    Checking the clock on my Sahara, I don’t have time to file licenses in Tarrant County and decide to do so Wednesday morning on my way to drop off cold supplies to my son who has sinusitis and diapers for my grandson.

    I decide to stop in Lake Worth to buy groceries, juice and soup. There are no paper towels, water or toilet paper at Walmart. I buy meat, pasta, bread, lunch meat and cheese as well as juice. The supplies are low but I assume the trucks are coming or running behind.

    There aren’t entire empty shelves other than cleaning products, hand sanitizers and toilet paper or water. There is still fruit and vegetables. There is still soup, rice, beans and other staples.

    Wednesday morning with my Jeep loaded for my sons house, I head to the clerks office. There are signs regarding the Coronavirus everywhere. The governor of California has revoked visitors to prisons. This is alarming.

    I have 5 Units next week. Will TDCJ follow suit? I’m thinking no but my husband is thinking a strong maybe on my phone call to him leaving the clerk. “They are cancelling major events. NASCAR, golf, basketball. This is spiraling out of control. Update your clients and stay on top of changes. They will need to know what’s going on. Stay calm. This will pass but it may take a week or two.”

    I’m worried but helpless to change what’s coming. Leigh Ann is increasingly concerned watching the news by Wednesday. Costco and Sam’s are running out of everything.

    There is no hand sanitizer available anywhere. My son needs it as he is sick with a new baby. Cindy and I decide to make our own hand sanitizer.

    My son is getting better but still answers the door in a mask. I begin unloading an full of items for my son and his wife and begin cooking lunch for them while checking on the baby.

    Ollie is three weeks old and doing well but he’s fragile. He wears an Owlett sock to monitor his breathing, blood sugar and heart rate.

    Leaving my son fully stocked other than baby wipes, I drop in on my husband down the street from my sons development. McBee Homes is just a few miles away. I invite my husband to lunch.

    We choose Boo Ray about 1/2 a mile from McBee. It’s dead. There are very few people eating out. I notice it. My husband does too.

    My husband decides to ask about my schedule next week and any possible changes. It’s a full plate. I’m at Green Bay Unit Monday. Wallace and Middleton Units Tuesday. Allred and Roach Units Thursday. Estes Unit Friday then back to Green Bay and Parker County. I will be driving about 2300 miles.

    My husband again advises me “TDCJ may follow California. Caddo Parrish is also suspending visits.” Matthew like me is following prison news.

    I consider cancelled visitation at prisons before answering my husband. “Weekend visits are thousands of people at prisons. My client and I are two people. I’ve decided to add to my booster shots a phnuemonia shot just in case and after Cindy’s heart surgery, believe it wouldn’t be a bad idea for her either.”

    I’m still not even entertaining the possibility that TDCJ will cancel my confirmed dates. I cannot imagine having to tell my clients who have waited months that another delay looms in the future. I worry. I fret.

    I also head to Dr Stern for an adjustment. The stress of Leigh Ann in California and people hoarding along with the possibility that my clients could be rescheduled has me with a stiff neck.

    Dr Stern has been my trusted chiropractic go to for twenty years. He knows when I’m stressed I hold stress in my shoulders. My left shoulder is out. He pops it back in and goes over the importance of finding time to relax. I have none. Time is something I never have.

    Thursday morning, Cindy arrives at WorthamWorld. We have a list of things to buy for an upcoming wedding at Botanic Garden and head to Hobby Lobby. We both discuss the news media and coverage of this mysterious virus. We worry about Leigh Ann and Maddy in California. But, we don’t think mass hysteria is going to come to Weatherford or Fort Worth. We are both wrong.

    I talk my twin into getting a phnuemonia shot with me at Walgreens. We both walk into prisons on a regular basis. Keeping our vaccines up to date is important not only for our own health but also to keep from getting ill and possibly getting our family or clients sick too.

    I buy colloidal silver. I buy zinc. I listen to Cindy complain about her arm pain. I have it too but it will get worse later. So painful was my left arm and shoulder by 1AM that I woke my husband crying out in pain. I go get Aleve.

    My arm feels like it weighs 100lbs. I worry I’m having a bad reaction.

    At 3AM, I call Cindy. Her arm is killing her too. We are both highly concerned this pain will be permanent.

    I consider buying a sling the pain is so intense. After reviewing answers from others who have had the same shot, I decide to use my arm rather than prop it.

    Friday morning, I drive to Weatherford. Cindy sits for me to meet her after Parker County Clerks Office. We can’t find feminine items for Cindy’s twin granddaughters and decide to set out on a mission. The twins are picky. They are also brand loyal.

    Walmart is a mad house. Empty shelves and angry shoppers abound. We leave and go to Big Lots. We then leave and go to Albertsons. We then leave and go to Brookshires then H E B. We come up empty. There are no hygiene products to be found the Twins brand or otherwise.

    There’s a fist fight at Brookshires. In small town America? Willow Park of all places? Two grown men fighting over toilet paper.

    Someone is honking and yelling at someone else to pull out of a parking lot space. Angry honking which is rare in Texas is everywhere. People are agitated. Angry. Scared.

    Governor Abbott announced a state of emergency. He also suggested removing visits from nursing homes, prisons and large gatherings of people.

    Fifteen minutes later, TDCJ suspends all visitation. But, does this affect my clients and I as we go into Units during the week. I begin calling Units for next week. The revoked visitation affects my clients. Their dates are cancelled.

    Arriving home, I’m still fielding panicked clients in Texas and other states. I have no idea how long this will last.

    An email from Chaplain Rentz of Bridgeport Unit that reads “I’ve just got off a conference call with all Chaplains in TDCJ and they have Cancelled all Volunteer entry into Units throughout the state until further notice.”

    I’m still trying to determine if my clients are affected when I find that they are. Everyone will need to reschedule. People who have waited months for a very important date. People who will be saddened and disappointed. My people. My clients.

    Leigh Ann sends me photos and videos of mass hysteria in California. I advise her that Texans are equally terrified, angry and behaving in a manner I’ve never seen before.

    I’m 55 years old. I’ve seen a lot of things. I’ve lived through the gas crisis in the 60’s and 70’s. I’ve never seen people fighting over food. I’ve never seen people fighting over water or toilet paper.

    I’ve never seen anything like this mass hysteria occur in my lifetime. I hope I never see it again..watching people fight over gas as a child was something neither Cindy or I can or will ever forget.

    We are all in this together. Please don’t hoard essential items that others need. Please don’t leave home if you are ill and please wash your hands…

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    Baylor NICU To Garza East, Allred & Roach Units. Driving To My Clients And Away From My Family Isn’t Always Easy…

    Last Saturday my first grandson was born three weeks early. Our unexpected joy would become worry within 24 hours though.

    Baby Oliver Glenn was having oxygen saturation issues within 24 hours of birth as well as low blood sugar and was subsequently moved to NICU.

    Of course my son and his wife were devastated to learn Ollie had breathing and blood sugar issues but, my son and his wife were anxious regarding moving Oliver to NICU and away from Stephanie’s hospital room.

    Cindy and I jumped right in to voice all of the reasons why NICU was the best place for Ollie.

    How do we know so much about NICU? Cindy’s twin granddaughters Maryssa and Makenna spent months in NICU.

    Cindy and my niece Leigh Ann also took turns sleeping in their cars in the parking garage. They both literally “lived at Cook’s NICU.”

    For months during that window, I delivered food and clean clothing to Leigh Ann and Cindy before and after going to work everyday.

    Having a child or twins in NICU is stressful to parents and guardians. You walk around in a daze. You are sleep deprived. You are worried. You feel helpless.

    My daughter in law Stephanie was discharged from Baylor Monday night.

    Leaving Ollie behind at Baylor was beyond heartbreaking.

    My son felt helpless to calm his wife or fix his son. Robbie was caught in the middle.

    Stephanie had decided they would sleep in their cars too. I was concerned about this idea. She had just had a baby. Leaving a hospital bed to sleep in your car isn’t a healthy option. I was strongly opposed to this idea.

    To solve the issue of being near NICU, I located the same hotel that Ella a reporter who interviewed and traveled with Cindy and I had stayed near my home in August. I then booked a room for my son and his wife within 9 minutes from the NICU.

    I was awake and returning calls at 6AM Tuesday. Driving 5.5 hours to Beeville to meet my bride on Tuesday morning, I had assumed that everything “back home” had calmed down. Why? Robbie and Steph would have a place to sleep far more comfortable than her Jeep and still be close enough to run to NICU every three hours to breastfeed. Cindy and the twins were doing well and had finished painting Maryssa’s room. Cindy is always remodeling. ALWAYS. Leigh Ann and Maddy were looking forward to flying to Texas in two weeks and my only worry was baby Ollie becoming strong enough to breathe and eat at the same time. But… I had more to worry about coming my way. Things I couldn’t foresee. Things no one saw coming.

    Arriving at the Beeville Clerks Office I waited for my bride and the grooms mom to arrive. As they rolled into the parking area beside me, I got off a call with a client flying in from Washington. My phone never stops ringing.

    Viewing the courthouse area, I had a few areas that I wanted to use for bridal photos and we had at least 30 minutes before we were due on site at Garza East.

    I began unloading furs, an umbrella, tiaras and several bouquets before finding the right areas and lighting for photos.

    I always bring at least 8 bouquets, 4 furs, numerous signs and 10 tiaras as well as fascinators and fun items for photo shoots.

    Leaving the courthouse, my bride and the grooms mother follow me to the Unit while I quickly check in with my son and his wife as well as Cindy.

    The Garza East wedding is at 4:30PM. I will be driving home in the rain and the dark 5.5 hours.

    It was a long day but beautiful wedding with a cute couple thrilled to finally be marrying.

    The grooms mother cried when she saw my bride and I walking out of the Unit after the wedding towards the razor wire decorated gates by the guard shack.

    The grooms mother was happy looking through the Unit wedding photos that I had bought. So happy that she cried and hugged her new daughter in law.

    I always buy 3 Unit photos if they are offered as a courtesy to my clients.

    Driving back to Fort Worth and knowing I had another long day Wednesday, my back is stiff from the drive in pouring rain. I’m relieved to get home by 11PM. Matthew has waited up for me and I’m immediately ready for bed. No dinner. No snacks just sleep. I’ve had so little sleep this week running to and from the hospital when not driving, meeting clients, helping Cindy remodel and filing licenses that I’m literally on auto pilot.

    Wednesday morning while in my bathroom throwing on my makeup and preparing to head to meet my first client in Wichita Falls, my phone rang. It was Maryssa. She was hysterical. Her twin sister had taken a handful of Xanax that she had I found in Cindy’s purse “because she can’t keep up with her AP classes and if she can’t make 100’s she doesn’t deserve to live.”

    Horrified and knowing I couldn’t be there to support my twin sister or my twin grandnieces, I have Maryssa call 911 and get an ambulance.

    My sister nearly needed an ambulance herself. Cindy has heart problems. She had heart surgery just a few months ago. The shock, the anger and the fear another attempted suicide with Makenna brought to her home yesterday quite nearly caused another heart attack for my sister.

    I was sick about Makenna and her inability to tell us to change her classes. I was saddened that once again my beautiful niece had become so upset about school that she believed her only way out was to swallow pills.

    I’m fearful. Agitated. Confused. Angry. I don’t know why anything like this could happen in our family twice in the past year. Why? Why? Why?

    Makenna is under medical supervision at Cook’s Children’s Hospital. Baby Oliver is five minutes away.

    My families hospital Merry Go Round continues in Fort Worth.

    Meanwhile I’m loading up to head to meet two brides at two Units two hours apart. I have a tight day. Two hours to Allred then two hours to Roach. Four hours from home and my family members.

    I’m crying driving from 30 to 35 headed to Wichita Falls. I’m crying because we haven’t fixed Makenna with counseling or medication.

    I’m crying because I feel helpless. I’m crying because my twin sister and her weak heart are breaking.

    I’m crying because for the second time in 8.5 months, Makenna has attempted suicide and twice Maryssa has found her twin sister incoherent and called 911 and literally saved her life.

    I’m crying because I am driving away from everyone who needs me to keep them calm being left on their own.

    I have no choice. I have responsibilities that require me to be elsewhere.

    Arriving in Wichita Falls, I call my bride. She is still at her hotel. Her shower wasn’t working properly. I meet her there and attempt to curl her hair. I’m all business now watching the clock.

    I know exactly what time I’m due at Allred and what time I must leave. My bride is running late. We were due at Allred at 11:30 to check in. It’s going to be 12. I know it and yet there’s nothing I can do to change it. It’s her wedding day. I want her to feel beautiful. I want her happy.

    I call the Chaplain and advise him of our delay. At 11:36AM, my bride and her family load up to follow me to Allred.

    My usual spot for photos is taken by a man selling yard art. I make a left rather than turn right towards the Unit and pull into a gas station.

    My bride and her family follow me. I see a wall that will work as a backdrop and begin quickly unloading inventory for the photo shoot.

    A quick ten minute photo shoot behind a gas station and I’m loading up to drive to the Unit with my new friends behind me.

    Cindy’s sending a text “they pumped her stomach she should be okay. What can we do? I don’t want to go through this again. We need a new psychiatrist. He just changed her prescriptions last week. I think those medications are causing suicidal thoughts.” Cindy is horrified. Terrified. Guilt ridden of being unaware that Makenna was so unhappy that she was searching for a way to end her life AGAIN.

    My voice text reply as I roll onto the lot at Allred was “ask them to ask her if these suicidal ideation thoughts started after changing her medication last week. It’s critical we find out how and why this has happened twice. Make a list. Ask questions I can’t be there to ask for you ask for me.”

    I’m crying again. I take a minute to compose myself. I’m due at Roach Unit at 2PM 106 miles from Allred. My client and I are 30 minutes later than I had planned.

    Getting out of my suv in the Allred parking lot, I take a deep breath and “I’m on.”

    My husband calls this my showgirl face. Business. All business. Leaving my many “cares behind,” I walk towards my bride and we enter together.

    Screening in, I advise the duty guard that Chaplain Redwine is expecting us for a wedding.

    We wait as we redress. I put my belt and shoes back on. I check my watch. 12:06PM.

    I worry about Cindy, Ollie, Makenna, Maryssa, my son and his wife. No one sees my fear, my worry, my anxiety about my family.

    I am a great actress. I hide my pain, my fear and my anxiety from others. My clients count on me to be organized and articulate and I am.

    I also compartmentalize what I cannot deal with when I cannot deal with it and I’m really good at it. Throughout my entire life, I’ve had to turn my back to the choir and focus on the congregation. From family to business I wear many hats.

    Years ago, a psychiatrist who studied me asked me how I was able to “put away” things I couldn’t deal with. The truth is that I learned this technique at a very young age. Cindy and I as well as our sister were victims of sexual assault for years. The predator was a family member. I learned to act normal because I had to. I was 6 years old. I also stopped speaking for many years. Cindy spoke for me. I developed a stutter after that first assault that would haunt me many years.

    For the people who “don’t believe inmates should have the right to marry” that consistently contact me to voice their opinions, I want to point out that the person who hurt me and my sisters as well as others was never prosecuted. That’s right I said never. So while you have opinions regarding my clients understand this… there are people walking around who should be in prison that aren’t. There are also people in prison who shouldn’t be that are. I never ask why anyone I’m marrying is in prison. It’s none of my business or yours either.

    It will be very late before I’m back in Fort Worth from TDCJ Roach Unit. I have another long day and a head full of concerns about baby Oliver and fears regarding Makenna. We cannot allow her to have a car right now. We can’t trust her not to try this again. We must know why this is happening. We must fight to find the truth. Makenna is quiet unlike her twin. She isn’t a “talker.” She internalizes. She keeps to herself.

    At 12:14PM Chaplain Redwine walks in to escort us. The walk through the garden area to the next building is always a moment where I breathe in deeply and realize that giving my best ceremony regardless of what’s going on in my life is incredibly important to my clients.

    My clients have waited months for this moment. I need their moment to be as magical and memorable as humanly possible. I need to be “on.” Attentive. I always am.

    The visitation area has a number of trainees inside. This is a problem. We will need to wait for them to clear the room and a guard to escort the inmate into the visitation room.

    At 12:19PM, we are ready to begin. I’ve counted quarters for three Unit photos. I’ve got my script prepared and I’ve set out the marriage license. I take off my watch and put it back on upside down to keep from looking at it. I do this when time is something I can’t control. My watch faces out from under my wrist rather than on top of it.

    Going over what’s allowed and what isn’t with my clients, I ask if the inmate has brought vows. He hasn’t. We begin.

    The ceremony hits laughs as well as precious and meaningful moments. I’m articulate. I want the importance of commitment with the joy of love and the journey of a life together covered.

    I sign the license as my couple pose for the photos I’ve purchased. I advise my bride that I must be running to Roach.

    It’s 12:39PM. I’m at least one hour and 45 minutes from Roach Unit. The Chaplain escorts me to the entry gate. We discuss the number of people listing my name but not hiring me at Allred and come to a solution. The Unit will verify my clients through my office.

    I run by my clients truck and let them know she will be out shortly. I put Roach Unit in my navigation and drive 80-85MPH to Childress.

    I answer texts by talking to Cindy and take calls from clients and Units. My husband checks in on me. My doctor calls in a refill on my Lorazapam. My life swirls around me as I focus on getting to my next Unit and client.

    At 1:57PM, my bride sends a text that she’s on site. I describe my filthy Jeep that I haven’t had time to wash since I bought it three weeks ago and we walk in together at exactly 2:07 after finding each other in the parking lot.

    The crows nest guard hollers down “Wendy Wortham?” I answer “yes sir.” Everyone in my life is sir or ma’am. I don’t care who you are or what you do or where you work. Sir and ma’am are the most frequent words out of my mouth.

    Ms Shoffner walks out to escort us into the visitation area. We wait on the inmate to arrive. It’s a bilingual ceremony and the librarian has volunteered to interpret. We go through the ceremony and because rings are not allowed to be exchanged with inmates due to Section K of the Administrative Directive, my bride hands her rings to the inmate to place on her fingers. I count coins for the weddings photos. I borrow a pen to sign the license. I go over what to do when the license is returned to my client. Ms Shoffner walks us out together. I’ve got a 4 hour drive back to Cook’s Childrens Hospital and Baylor NICU and I have a worried husband wondering how I’m handling a day I had expected to be filled with love and joy that was dampened by the unexpected incident at Cindys house with Makenna and the possibility of jaundice as well as oxygen saturation for Oliver. I worry how I’m going to teach my grandniece her self worth and to set limitations with school classes. Her overwhelming schedule is driving her to feel like a failure. I plan, I worry and I realize my clients are following me to the bridal shoot and hit my brakes near a lake.

    Unloading items my bride and her sister find a few fun items.

    I’m now driving back to Fort Worth. The rain doesn’t hit until beyond Wichita Falls. I’m fielding calls and talk texting replies. I’m wondering what I’m walking into at Cook’s first with Makenna, Maryssa and Cindy before heading to NICU to see my son and his wife with Oliver. I’m mentally preparing myself. I’ve just left two joyous celebrations. I’ve just driven over 8 hours the day after driving 12. I’m mentally tired. I’m scared. I’m worried. My family will see none of this. I am the Matriarch. I am the leader. I fix problems. I correct chaos. In last nights situations, I soothed the fear of my family. We will bound together. We will circle the wagons. We will recover and by God’s Grace my niece will learn to communicate her fears and concerns. She will learn to come to us and she will learn that she can. There isn’t anything anyone in my family can say or do that will rattle me at two hospitals. I will remain calm. I’m the calm one.

    At Cook’s, Cindy is crumpled on an uncomfortable sofa. I suggest coming home with me and getting some rest. I visit with Makenna. I was right about the new meds. We discuss her curriculum. I discuss changing it. I discuss why and how attempted suicide effect the entire family. I discuss a new psychologist. I make a list of what she needs from home. I explain why I wasn’t there all day and why Cindy couldn’t ride in the ambulance as she was being screened by a second ambulance for a heart attack. I’m calm. I’ve already called Mesa Springs for outpatient when she’s medically cleared. I leave to visit my son and his wife. It’s 9:00PM.

    At Baylor with Maryssa who wasn’t allowed to spend the night with Makenna, I find my son crying in the hall. We sit in uncomfortable chairs. I ask him to stay calm. Premie babies aren’t ready yet. I explain that I stayed up late researching the oxygen saturation issues being present predominantly with premature babies. We discuss the possibility of Ollie staying in NICU until his due date March 7th. My son admits he’s feeling helpless and would like to leave with the baby. I remind him the baby is safer at NICU. He asks about Makenna. Maryssa and he sit together as I walk back to find my daughter in law trying to bundle Oliver. I pick him up. He doesn’t cry. He never cries when I hold him. He’s tiny. I ask about jaundice after detecting yellow around his cheeks. Stephanie tells me “they are watching that. We just want him healthy. Robbie is upset we can’t bring him home.” I again reiterate why keeping him in the hospital is in his best interest. It’s not an easy conversation.

    My daughter in law “doesn’t want to leave the hospital.” She’s exhausted. My son is exhausted. They’ve been in NICU every 2-3 hours for days and they are walking zombies. I remind her to please go to the hotel and sleep a few hours. I worry about the baby sending their fear. I remind them to sing or read and remain positive in NICU or when around Oliver. They leave with Maryssa and I headed to the hotel I’ve rented. They are so tired that I call to make sure they made it safely.

    This morning at 6:45AM Cindy knocked on my door. “I can’t sleep there the chair is terrible the sofa is worse. My whole body hurts. I’m so scared why does she keep doing this? Is Maryssa up? We have to get her to school. What do you have today? I have to file three licenses and print edited photos, go to the post office, swing by Parker County Jail, email my credentials to Johnson County Jail, go to the cleaners, go to the school and change Makennas class’s, answer over 100 emails, call 17 Units for March scheduling and visit Makenna then go see Robbie and Steph.”

    We made it through the day and brought Makenna clothing while telling her she was out of the genius classes that were stressing her. We give her books and stencils and snacks. We give her love and show her hope. We are masking the fear that gnaws on is hiding in dark corners. The worry of leaving her home alone and the panic of her having a car and being out of our sight. Learning to trust Makenna to talk to us will take time.

    Back over at Baylor, my daughter in law is crying “I just want to go home. Why can’t he get better?” The long talk of doing what’s best for Oliver begins again. Stephanie’s hormonal. She’s just had a baby and is trying to adjust to breastfeeding. It’s a difficult time for a first time mother. She wants to stay with the baby but NICU will not allow parents to stay or sleep with the babies. You are effectively booted out every three hours you are allowed back. It’s hard.

    Tomorrow I’m at Green Bay, Mercado, North Tower and back at Cook’s and Baylor. Tomorrow I will hide my fear about Makenna believing she had no other options. Tomorrow I will continue to teach my son and his wife the merits of patience. The importance of putting your children first and why NICU is keeping Oliver on the road to recovery.

    Talking to my clients is always easier than talking to my family but, by the faith I have in prayer and my own patience, I hope that Makenna’s treatment and changes in her school workload as well as a re evaluation of her medication will prevent another suicidal ideation scenario. I will try to keep my son and his wife aware that Ollie is improving everyday and that when it comes to children that worrying is part of the role…

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    On The Inside Looking Out. Green Bay To Marlin To McClennan County To Mercado To Belltower To Omni…

    I spend 3-5 days a week inside state and federal prisons as well as county jails, venues, military bases, backyards and other locations. I am the busiest Inmate Officiant in the United States. I’m also not limited to Texas. I’m licensed and certified to conduct inmate ceremonies in numerous states. 

    What I’m not is “available to anyone.” I’m picky. I regularly turn down “traditional requests.” Why? I can and if it isn’t fun for me I’m not interested. I’m on staff at numerous venues and for years now the only traditional clients I’ve had were booked from a venue I am on staff at or repeat bookings. 

    Frequently people “who found me on the internet” contact me. These people are neither prospects or interested in retaining services. These people are production companies, reporters or even others “who saw how successful I am and want me to teach them how to do what I’ve done or educate them regarding what I “do or who I do it for.” 

    I’m not in the education industry. I’m an entrepreneur and expert in the prison weddings industry. If you’d like me to educate you, hire me as a consultant. If you’d like me to create competition I don’t have move along. 

    I’m out of the demanding diva business. Instead, I focus on helping people who are thankful and appreciative. I can assure you none of my traditional clients send Christmas cards or check on my sister. 

    My clients marrying an inmate are honest, real, raw, passionate and down to earth. I prefer working with them. I prefer driving down the road listening to music on another adventure. I don’t prefer working with divas. Thanks anyway. 

    I don’t work for money anymore I work for fun. However, I’m not a volunteer and my time, experience and knowledge are valuable. I know my worth. 

    Standing inside a prison with my clients gazing at razor wire glistening like diamonds in the sun, I’m often on the inside looking out. Literally. 

    A few months ago, I married a client on the outside who had been inside for twenty years. Johnny had been to three TDCJ Units. I knew all three. I’ve been to them many times over the years. Johnny is a success story. He is an amazing husband and good friend too. 

    Johnny was beginning life after lock up. I met Johnny and Brenda and drove them to the clerks office to buy their license. My team and I loaned the flowers and set up their backyard for the wedding. On February 3rd I had first met David at the Tarrant County Clerks Office. He was nervous about buying the license. Most of my clients are. 

    Since I was filing licenses from my weekend of weddings, I told David to meet me at 9:30AM. David like all of my clients was excited and nervous. 

    The clerks office can be intimidating but Tarrant County is one of the friendliest clerks offices in Texas. The number of times I’ve met clients at Tarrant, Dallas and Parker County Clerks Office’s surprises people. But I’m by far more than “just an Officiant.” My role is that of an advisor, a hand holder, the mother of the bride and often in such cases as David, a mother figure walking him through a complicated process. 

    Today at Marlin Unit, David married his best friend. Their joy was evident. I’m performing their Vow Renewal in just a few months in Fort Worth. I love happy endings. 

    I get things done. I have a jam packed schedule and I’ve never advertised. Each and every ceremony is custom created for my clients. Their ceremonies are as special as they are. 

    I am detail oriented and OCD. I’m a list maker, task taker, pioneer and trailblazer. David like all of my clients had “heard about me.” My reputation is my calling card. He knew he could entrust me with the complicated process of getting him married and he was right.

    This morning as I headed to Green Bay Unit for an 8:30AM wedding, I took a call from someone who had listed my name on paperwork at Allred but HAD NOT HIRED ME. For weeks now, phone calls from this someone who thinks I’m going to alter my schedule to accommodate her needs without following my booking procedures has been stressful. I don’t need stress in my life. I enjoy what I do and I don’t have to work. I certainly don’t work for anyone who hasn’t bothered to hire me. 

    I cannot stress this point enough.., if you haven’t hired me I will not be conducting your ceremony. 

    Due to the workload of a Unit often spending weeks to process the I60, Allred Unit will now call me to verify client status. I advised the caller today of my tight schedule and why attempting to schedule herself on February 19th at Allred wouldn’t work. I’ve had this discussion before with her regarding February 5th when she failed to hire me and also failed to show up. I don’t have time to play games with anyone. Pay me don’t play me. 

    My patience with this young lady as well as the Chaplains patience at Allred Unit have been with paper thin. I CANNOT and WILL NOT commit to anyone who has not committed to me. Arguing with her after learning she had called Allred and attempted to put herself on my schedule February 19th when I obviously don’t have time since I’m at Roach on the same day was an escapade in Futility. My schedule is tight. 

    On Wednesday after consistently telling the two people who used my name without hiring me to send money or stop contacting me, I posted the following update to enlighten anyone unaware that Cole to Allred or Allred to Roach or Cole to Hodge or Hodge to Ferguson are an all day affair of driving for me and why I will not commit to anyone who isn’t a booked client to clarify… 

    Attention TDCJ Allred Unit Clients, after a lengthy conversation with Chaplain Redwine and due to my schedule which often has me at other Units on the same day (Roach, Cole and Goree specifically), the Unit will NOW CALL ME rather than you to schedule. Why? Because a number of people have been using my name and credentials without hiring me to obtain a date at Allred Unit. 

    Each couple has 20 minutes. My schedule is TIGHT. I allow for 20 minutes per couple in each Unit. I must factor time inside the Unit as well as travel in order to address additional clients on the same day. 

    I can’t just “add someone” because I’m on site. That’s not fair to my existing clients and certainly won’t work with my schedule. 

    On February 19th I have a confirmed client and only one confirmed client at Allred. Why only one? Because this client was initially booked on 02-05 but didn’t have her marriage license so we rescheduled. After rescheduling at Allred, another client was Approved at Roach. Because of this and the distance between Units, I knew that I only had time for one wedding at Allred before heading to Roach.  

    Because I am also at Roach Unit on 02-19, I must leave Allred no later than 12:15PM in order to be at Roach by 2:30PM . Roach is 106 miles from Allred. 

    Adding another client at Allred would effectively add another 20 minute ceremony at Allred. Because of the timeline I have I’m not adding anyone else on February 19th onto my schedule. I know my limitations and know who I have on my roster at Allred. If you aren’t on my roster though you aren’t a booked client and will need to book services. You will roll to March too. I have zero flexibility for any other weddings on the 19th at Allred. 

    Since I have discussed this “time crunch” issue regarding several units on the same date at length with Chaplain Redwine, we are working together in order to make your Dream Event a reality at Allred Unit. 

    Timing is critical for me. I’m never late and I never rush my clients. Whether I’m moving from Cole to Allred or Allred to Roach or Hodge to Goree since all of these Units use Wednesday’s, my schedule is carefully planned and mapped out. 

    While Ferguson is also a Wednesday Unit, I rarely (if ever) schedule another Unit on a Ferguson Wednesday day. Why? Because Ferguson schedules at 1PM and after. Unless the other Unit is Goree, the possibility of moving from Allred, Cole or Roach to Ferguson on the same day isn’t even a remote possibility. Goree and Ferguson are close enough to be a possibility and schedule on Wednesday’s as well. 

    The distance from Cole to Ferguson is approximately 3 hours and 15 minutes. The distance from Allred to Ferguson is approximately 4 hours and 22 minutes. The distance from Roach to Ferguson is approximately 5 hours and 43 minutes. The distance from Cole to Ferguson is approximately 3 hours and 19 minutes. The distance from Ferguson to Goree is approximately 30 minutes which makes a shift from Ferguson to Goree even possible on the same date. 

    I know the exact distance between Units because I have to. While it’s possible to move from Tennessee Colony to Huntsville to Livingston, it’s not always possible to move from a Unit outside the distance of 2 hours to another Unit without careful planning. 

    Only once have I moved from Huntsville to Gatesville on the same day. Why? Because the distance is nearly 3 hours. I prefer Units be within 2 hours on the same day to give me some degree of flexibility. Moving from Allred to Cole or Cole to Allred or even Cole to Roach is far and beyond two hours which is why I would never book Allred, Cole and Roach on the same date. It’s humanly impossible. 

    Subsequently, I would never book Allred and Ferguson or Goree or even Hodge on the same date. The distance from Hodge to Allred is approximately 4 hours and 19 minutes. 

    I prefer to book Hodge when I’m scheduled at a Huntsville Unit. Why? Because I can easily move from Rusk to Huntsville. Approximate distance between Rusk and Huntsville? One hour and thirty nine minutes. 

    For a few years now in Texas, I’ve had Units and even people I’ve talked to that didn’t book services call me “about a date.” If someone or the Unit is calling me “about a date” and I don’t recognize the name, the person isn’t my client. This is a real problem and it continues to happen. 

    To correct this continuing issue of people listing me on I60’s without bothering to book me, Units are working with me to stop working on paperwork for a wedding that isn’t going to happen. 

    Last year, Hodge Unit called me “about a date with my client.” I didn’t have anyone on my books for Hodge and advised the Chaplain of this fact. The Chaplain at Hodge Unit gave me the contact information of this person and I called her. She had expected me to officiate her wedding without hiring me and was surprised to hear that “I wasn’t in any way obligated to drive 3 hours one way simply because she found my name on the internet.” After a phone call with her and carefully explaining why “I wouldn’t volunteer to drive 6 hours round trip at my own expense because she found my name on the internet and used it on the I60” I called the Unit and cancelled. 

    For anyone unaware of this, an Approved I60 with my name on it for someone who hasn’t hired me is a problem for them because I can cancel the wedding. Using my name and not bothering to book me doesn’t obligate me in any form to show up hours away. Why? Because I have booked clients that followed procedure expecting me on site at their wedding and if I’m not on site there won’t be a wedding. 

    If you aren’t my client, don’t expect me to drop everything and volunteer. I drive 1500-3k miles a week. I’m busy. I’m driving to meet clients who actually HIRED ME. 
    Further, I cannot and will not “move another client” who has followed my booking procedure and has been waiting for 1-3 months aside just because “someone else” who hasn’t followed booking procedures expects me to do so. 

    Don’t ASSUME my schedule or my availability. Don’t assume that you are more important than someone else. Everyone waits. If you are holding a contract and haven’t returned it, I can assure you that calling me about a date isn’t going to go well. I know exactly how many clients are on my books each and every month. Many roll over during the waiting process. Meaning that as well as roll over clients I have new clients each month. 

    At any given time I have up to 30 clients waiting on dates. I limit new bookings in order to be available. I never overbook myself. This is to ensure my availability. 
    My priority is the booked client. My priority is getting to my next Unit in time. My priority is keeping my promises. I ALWAYS KEEP MY PROMISES. 

    What my priority isn’t is accommodating someone or even several someone’s who were aware of my being on site at a Unit and expecting me to simply “add them into my schedule as a courtesy.”This isn’t how my booking procedure or my schedule work. 

    Let’s review how and what create a client relationship one more time. 1. I mail you a contract. 2. The contract outlined the terms of the deal and requires a deposit. 3. When a client returns the contract we create a client file and return a receipt and signed contract to the client. If you are returning a contract without a deposit, the contract requires a deposit. Because this has occurred in the past I’m going to go over why we hold a contract and wait on the deposit prior to creating a client file, I cannot commit to someone who isn’t committing to me. 

    My contracts are very specific and require a booking deposit. 
    Expecting me to officiate your wedding simply because you are aware I will be on site is not only line jumping but also arrogant. 

    My booked clients and my schedule are my PRIORITIES. 

    If you are NOT ON MY BOOKS YOU ARE NOT ON MY SCHEDULE. 

    If you have not returned your contract AND your deposit, you are not a booked client and not my responsibility. I cannot be clearer about this. 

    I do not advertise. I do not book more clients than I can address and I regularly bump new inquiries for bookings to the following month in order to ensure availability for my existing clients. 
    Many TDCJ Units are now requiring the last 4 digits of my drivers license number to limit people pulling my name and then using my credentials to obtain a date for marriage at a Unit. This has to stop. It creates work for the Unit and surprise phone calls for me. I don’t like surprises and Units don’t either. Without an Approved Officiant on site there won’t be a wedding. 

    The paperwork on a Units end to process an I60 is time consuming. Because of this, processing paperwork for a wedding that isn’t obviously going to happen without an Officiant, Texas Units will now requesting information about me that isn’t listed anywhere on the internet or having me contact to confirm. If you are not my client, I will advise the Unit of this and “your date” will be cancelled. 

    While driving to meet my client at Ferguson Unit, one of the people who had listed me on the I60 at Allred but not bothered hiring me at Allred called me. Driving along I prepared to go over why and how rescheduling on the 19th weren’t going to work for her. 

    She has now had three weeks to actually book services and still hasn’t bothered to do so. 

    While she’s holding that contract though my schedule continues to book up with actual clients effectively bumping her opportunity to actually book services AND obtain a date with me. 

    Since this bride had been on the schedule 02-05 as Chaplain Redwine has added her knowing I had four other clients on the same day. Chaplain Allred was unaware I was also at Cole on the same day. 

    She had bothered to call Allred to cancel 02-05 but didn’t bother contacting me regarding this matter as she assumed my availability and somehow assumed she didn’t need to book services either. 

    I confirm bookings at Units. Why? Because my schedule requires planning that’s why. First, this bride doesn’t book or retain services THEN assumes she can reschedule her wedding and my schedule without retaining me? What the? Now you are catching on as to why obtaining your Officiant and services is and should be a priority. Without following procedure, I can assure you that no one else is going to officiate your ceremony either. 

    Frankly on 02-05 I had “timed to the second” my actual booked clients at Allred and the drive time necessary to get to the Unit along with icy roads. 

    The timing was critical as I had not only clients at Allred but also clients at Cole on 02-05. I could not be LATE to either Unit. I am NEVER late. 

    I advised her of all of the reasons that assuming she could just show up and I would have time to address her although she had made no commitment to me wouldn’t work on 02-05 OR on 02-19 AND she still hadn’t booked me EITHER. 

    On 03-04 I’m at Cole and Roach. I advised her that she would need to actually booked me for a secondary date in March and that 03-04 wasn’t an option either as I don’t have time for Cole, Allred and Roach on the same day. I’m being serious. Cole to Allred is 3 hours. Allred to Roach is 2 hours. 

    Pertaining to my actual clients at Allred, the arrival time at Allred is going to be changed after 02-16-2020 to 10:30 check in for 11AM ceremonies after 02-19-2020.

    Outside of the McClennan County Jail waiting on my clients, Allred Non Client called me AGAIN. She had sent another text that read “Chaplain Dooley won’t believe me. You have to call him.” Why would I? She still hadn’t booked me and quite frankly I don’t want to be a nervous wreck adding another client at Allred on a really tight scheduling day.

    I don’t have to do anything for someone who hasn’t hired me going behind my back and attempting to piggyback my tight schedule. 

    Because I had 41 text messages by the time I walked out of Marlin today, I had my Apple play app read text messages as I drove towards Waco. It’s easier to talk text and drive and safer. 

    Persistently pesky non client continues to disrupt my day again today. What she didn’t do was send money. I had ignored her latest text. Why? Because at 10:44AM this morning I had already told her to wire money. I meant it. Chaplain Redwine and Dooley are well aware she hasn’t hired me. How? I told them. 

    I would not call the Unit an add her onto my burdensome schedule UNTIL she paid my fee in full. By the time she left the text while I was in Marlin Unit, she had finally realized that she couldn’t simply add herself to my schedule. Yet she refuses to send money? She’s a waste of my time. I know it, The Unit knows it and I’m guessing she knows it too.

    She has consistently refused to follow protocol. NOW she was texting me? On a 7 Client day? My contracts require payment in full SEVEN DAYS PRIOR TO THE EVENT DATE.

    Either you are serious about marrying an inmate or you aren’t but I can assure you that I’m not going to cut a booked clients event short or risk running late because someone who has consistently failed to follow my protocol assumes they are entitled. They aren’t. 

    You are either a booked client or you aren’t and if you aren’t, you are not on my schedule. PERIOD. 

    Due to the consistent misuse of my credentials by people pulling my name off the internet, Units are now requiring me to contact and verify client status.

    I’m leaving Mercado Event Center to head to Belltower Chapel before heading to Omni Hotel for a midnight wedding. I have another full weekend of events. What I don’t have is time to deal with people who cannot or will not follow my protocol. My time is valuable. I don’t waste time on people who aren’t worthy of my time or my attention…

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    Welcome To My World- Holliday Unit To Ferguson To Marlin & Points In Between…

    Describing my life in one sentence would be impossible although I’m often asked to do so. From juggling phone calls from clients to answering emails, addressing concerns and bouncing from one event to the next while addressing my family, the best sentence I could use would be “I’m never bored.”

    Monday while filing licenses in three counties and meeting clients at Parker and Palo Pinto Counties, I resent my credentials to Lasalle. Each year in Texas, I recertify my credentials with TDCJ as well as federal facilities. For some reason, Texas is the only state that has this particular requirement. I had faxed Lasalle last week but apparently my paperwork was misplaced. This issue has been resolved. 

    One of my clients was confused regarding “needing permission to marry at an ICE Facility.” For anyone else unaware of the process, I’m including the link- ICE Detention Standards. 

    There is a process to marry at any State or Federal Facility. An ICE Facility also has protocol and procedure in place that must be strictly adhered to.

    Arriving in Huntsville Tuesday to meet my beautiful bride, we walked in together and out of the pouring rain. Her day had finally come and her joy was evident. As usual, Unit photos are always hit and miss at Holliday. 

    The background of the wall doesn’t photograph as well as the plain wall at Holliday but due to the tables and chairs in the room, we worked with what we had. Leaving Holliday, my bride followed me to a nearby shopping center where I handed her an umbrella. The dreary day of non stop rain didn’t dampen her smile though and her beauty sparkled like a rainbow. 

    I always pack a spare umbrella. I’m adding several bridal umbrellas to our inventory for Spring. Wednesday I left Fort Worth in the rain to again nearly drive to Huntsville. This turnaround trip is a regular occurrence for me. Whether I’m in Huntsville one day and Houston the next, I’ve driven 287 to 45 so many times I could probably drive it blindfolded. There are many Units in Huntsville as well as the Houston area. 

    My Ferguson bride met me at Buccees. A huge truck stop styled tourist destination. Everyone loves Buccees including all three of my grandnieces. 

    I followed Rosalinda to Ferguson where we were screened in and escorted to the visitation area. She was nervous and worried about crying. After hearing why, I understood her sorrow. The groom was serving a life sentence. This is a heavy cross for loved ones to bear.

    As we waited for the guard to print her wedding photos, Rosalinda told me that her groom had recently been the storyline of Marriage & Murder. I had never heard of it but, I married Miguel Martinez at Hughes Unit unaware he had been featured on I’m A Killer. I don’t ask questions. Why inmates are incarcerated is none of my business. Occasionally though my clients share this information. I rarely watch TV and when I do it’s Matlock, Columbo or 80’s shows. For a few years Cindy and I watched CSI Las Vegas. But as a whole I’m not a tv watching person. 

    I cannot imagine how helpless and painful it would be to watch a show about someone you love. I cannot imagine the loneliness and isolation my clients marrying a lifer face. You will always hear me say how strong my clients are because it’s true. They are warriors. I’ve married people for eight years now. Very few people I’ve married to an inmate have divorced. How few? 3 out of hundreds. On the outside? 3 as well. 6 divorced in eight years out of over 2k weddings surprise people. But I’m a friend, a counselor, a shoulder long after the wedding. My role surpasses that of any traditional Officiant. I care about my clients.

    Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and for over a thousand of my clients it’s a day they will spend alone. There won’t be romantic dinners or expensive gifts but there will be love. They will drive long distances to visits this weekend. They will jump when the phone rings. They will also hold love in their hearts and determination in their souls.

    As usual, I’m working on one of my busiest days of the year. I will move from Green Bay to Marlin to Mercado to Belltower to the Omni. 

    I will witness the promise of love after lock up as I have hundreds of times before. I will also pray my clients arrive safely home on a lonely journey after leaving a Unit Wedding. I will worry about my clients. I will take their calls for the rest of my life. I will celebrate their victories and mourn their sorrows. They are a fabric of my life… 

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    Attitude, Aptitude And Experience Are Keys To Success.

    This morning while preparing to fly from LAX to DFW, a call from Waco, Texas came in. The caller was planning to marry at TDCJ Robertson Unit. I take calls 7 days a week from 6AM to 9PM. Robertson is slow to or process paperwork. A few of my TDCJ Units are. How do I know? I have 7 clients waiting on paperwork or dates at Robertson and others waiting months at a handful of Units. Lock Downs stop paperwork. Patience in the planning process is a must. 

    The Certified Offender ID takes weeks and occasionally months to come in. Once it does, a copy takes an additional few weeks. It’s time consuming to wait on paperwork. Occasionally for my clients, it’s frustrating too. 

    Planning your Prison Wedding requires paperwork and if you’ve never done this before, someone patient to lay out the process. I’m that person. 

    While McClennan County will allow you to purchase a marriage license with a certified birth certificate and Absentee Affidavit, there are a number of counties who require the TDCJ Certified Inmate ID. Obtaining this ID can take weeks to months. Know this “going in.” 

    For many clients, it’s by far easier to obtain a certified birth certificate but if you can’t, the long wait on an ID in Texas begins. Buckle up and be patient. 

    You can go to ANY clerks office in Texas to buy a marriage license. Remember though that you cannot buy a marriage license in Texas without both parties being present UNLESS you have a notarized absentee affidavit explaining the absence of the other party. 

    The absentee affidavit is critical to getting that license. While the option of an inmate ID or birth certificate exist there are no options regarding the absentee affidavit. 

    A few clerks offices require the ID, Absentee Affidavit and Certified Birth Certificate. This is why having options to go to another clerks office are important. 

    For a number of folks who think that ANYONE can officiate a Prison Wedding, it should be noted that only a handful of people actually can. That person must be authorized to walk into a Unit. That person should also know and follow all rules of procedure. That person should be reliable, honest and transparent. That person should also have a stellar track record. That person is me. 

    Because the planning process can easily take 4-6 weeks in Texas, there are rolling clients on my books at any given time. Because of this, I limit new bookings and I don’t advertise. I am sought after for inmate Officiant services more than anyone else in this industry. Why? Because I care and because I know what I’m doing. I also know the ins and outs. 

    A few people were surprised that LBGT prison weddings aren’t uncommon. Others offended about my diverse clients. Some of these people voice their opinions to me. Opinions are not my luggage and not my trip. 

    If you are hiring a Prison Wedding Officiant, their role involves far more than just showing up. They should be holding your hand throughout a confusing planning process too. I do. My clients are important to me.What can you wear? From pantsuits to skirts and dresses to slacks, wear what’s within the guideline and what you feel comfortable in. You can wear ornamental headpieces but we must clear the Unit. You may be asked to remove hairpieces to enter the Unit. Don’t panic I will help you redress after clearing into the Unit. Who files the license? You can but I prefer to. Why? Because a license must be filed within 30 days of me signing it. I file licenses three days a week in person or by certified mail. I’m OCD. If you forget to file your license, we can request a duplicate or amend the license but it’s a lot of trouble. It’s easier for me to file it for you and I’m happy to do so.Why do you need a certified copy? The Unit and Inmate Records require a filed copy of your marriage license. While a copy is a few dollars cheaper it isn’t a legal copy. Please request a certified copy and mail it to the attention of inmate records at your Loved Ones Unit.

    Why are some Unit photos better than others? Each Unit is different. One Unit has better equipment or a more skilled Correctional Officer taking photos. 

    You offer free photos with your extensive inventory as a courtesy. Why? Because weddings are Life Events. I want my clients to have the flowers, the furs, the tiaras, the fascinators, the signs and fun they deserve on wedding day. I want them to have an opportunity to celebrate their marriage.My clients are warriors. They make their love story last. They endure. They persevere. They overcome all obstacles placed in their path. They are the strongest people I have ever met… 

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    “Strength doesn’t come from what you can do. It comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t.” Rikki Rogers

    Last night a rather surprising text regarding wearing a costume to a TDCJ Wedding came through. While I would love for everyone to wear whatever they want, it’s something that neither you or I can “choose.” 

    Let’s review attire on wedding day once more time ya all. Shoulders must be covered. Dress lengths must be within 3″ from the middle of your knee. While costumes are not directly addressed on TDCJ’s site, I have never encountered a situation where wearing a costume would be deemed “appropriate.” 

    Why? Because we are at a prison and we don’t make the rules. Under TDCJ’s visitation dress code guidelines, there is a note that the Unit Captain has the final say. Why is this important? Because even if you are or feel you are within the dress code, the Captain can and will hand you a cafeteria smock if he feels you are dressed out of code. 

    Each state has a visitation dress code. Certain states such as Texas allow sandals and flip flops while other states don’t. 

    What to remember on wedding day at your Unit Wedding is that the majority of all of our service area states follow visitation guidelines pertaining to your attire on wedding day. what this means is that certain Units have “Allowed” wedding dresses as long as they are within the code. 

    Certain Units will not allow wedding dresses. The Unit decides not us. 
    On more than one occasion in Texas, my brides have been so closely scrutinized regarding dress lengths and cleavage that it’s best to bring an additional change of clothing “just in case.” Why? Because if someone at the Unit finds fault with what you are wearing, the Unit can insist on a cafeteria smock to enter the Unit. 

    Clothing for my male clients has never been an issue. Perhaps because dress lengths vary and low cut shirts and blouses can be deemed “too revealing,” the reasons I address your clothing being an important aspect of our visit to the Unit is to protect you from being handed a cafeteria smock on wedding day. 

    No one wants to walk into a Unit wearing a full length long sleeved button front cafeteria smock. 

    If you have doubts or wish to have a second opinion about your wedding day wear, please feel free to text me photos.

    TDCJ Visitation Dress Code Guidelines… 
    Visitors are encouraged to dress conservatively.
    Sandals, flip-flops, and open-toe shoes may be worn.
    Clothing that is tight fitting, revealing, or made with see-through fabrics shall not be allowed.
    Sleeveless shirts and dresses are allowed, but must cover the shoulders.
    Shorts and skirts no shorter than three inches above the middle of the knee while standing, capri pants, or long pants are allowed.
    Length is not restricted for pre-adolescent boys and girls, generally ages 10 and younger.

    Clothing with pictures or language that may be considered profane or offensive by current public standards shall not be allowed.

    Note: The duty warden shall make the final decision on whether clothing is appropriate. READ THIS LAST SENTENCE AGAIN. 

    Even if you are within visitation dress code, IF A DUTY WARDEN deems your attire “inappropriate,” they can and will hand you a cafeteria smock. If you refuse to wear this item, your wedding will be canceled. 

    My first encounter with the “dreaded cafeteria smock” being handed to a client was at TDCJ Torres Unit. My client initially refused to wear the smock. After a visit from the Warden in the shakedown area and a lengthy discussion from me after driving 5.5 hours to the Unit though, my client in fact did wear the garment. Otherwise, her wedding would have been canceled. Remember the Warden signs off on the I60 Request For Inmate Marriage. The Warden can and does CONTROL who CAN marry at their Unit. I strongly discourage arguing with staff at ANY Unit state or federal that I conduct ceremonies at. Your behavior is outlined in my contract. 

    My second encounter was at TDCJ Allred Unit. My client had sent a text of the dress she planned to wear to me BUT it was of a model and not her. My client was taller than the model and due to this issue her dress length and the “cut” of the dress wasn’t within 3″ of the middle of her knee. There’s a reason I ask for photos of you in the dress rather than a photo you found online. Allred Unit IS THE REASON. The photo of the model had the dress length hitting BELOW the knee rather than above it. Although her shoulders were covered and no cleavage was visible, the cut on the front portion left a 4-6″ visibility of her knee. Because I had nothing for her to change into, being handed a cafeteria smock literally upset her to such an extent that I had to assist her walking to the visitation area. 

    Clothing near misses? I’ve had a few. At TDCJ Holliday Unit, I pulled my brides tank under her tee shirt up in the front and down in the back to prevent her from needing a smock. 

    At TDCJ Polunsky Unit, my brides dress was within code in the front and out of code on the back. Why? Hips shortened the length in the back. Even after pulling the slip in the back down for the Duty Guard, the dress was still not within the 3″ guideline. Luckily, my bride had a long sweater that she retrieved to wear into the Unit. Otherwise, she would have been wearing the cafeteria smock. 

    While “pushing the limits” regarding the dress code has consistently backfired for a few people that were unaware of a Duty Captain having the final call on clothing, you should know that they have the power, custody and control to decide whether what you are wearing is “acceptable” or not. 

    Let’s review how and why I encourage you to send me photos of you wearing the outfit and not a photo of the outfit you found online. A model could be shorter than you. A model could be less buxom than you. A model can have a lack of hips that make the dress appear longer in the back. I need to see a photo of you wearing the outfit to check the length, the cleavage and the back of the dress as well as the fit to ensure it isn’t too tight or revealing. 

    At Buster Cole Unit, my bride was told her pants were too tight and revealing. Luckily, I had been to the cleaners and had clothes that would work in my suv. Otherwise my bride would have worn a cafeteria smock. 

    If your pants are too tight or too revealing, even pants can be outside the code. 

    I’m going to once again revisit that regarding your relationship with an inmate that YOU ARE IN CHARGE not the inmate. Continued correspondence from clients who feel the “inmate is controlling them from the inside” are alarming. Know your worth. Know your value. You are doing it all on the outside and you are doing it alone. 

    Leaving Belltower Chapel yesterday, a text from an unfamiliar number regarding “needing a divorce ASAP” came through. Because of this and because my client and not the inmate are my priority, I sent a link for a Pro Se (self filed) Divorce in Texas. 

    Based on your income, you may qualify for an “Indigent Filing.” What is this and how does it work? Certain instances and situations qualify for a waiver on filing fees. Remember that if you are self filing your own divorce that you are expected to follow the Texas Family Code. If you need the link from the Texas Bar Association, here it is Pro Se Divorce Handbook Texas Bar Association.

    Choosing whether to represent yourself or hire an attorney is a personal decision. Understand though that you will need to follow the Texas Code by filing in the county you reside in. 

    I’m at county jails and clerks offices today and available by phone, text, email and DM on FB and Instagram social sites. I do not respond to DM’s on Twitter due to spam and my burdened schedule. 

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    Rolling Down The Road. Estelle To Holiday To Polunsky. Love Is Like Oxygen…

    Leaving my office at 7:30AM yesterday to head to TDCJ Estelle Unit, my dog Foxy Wortham was still not feeling well and like my husband, our growing concern over whether or not Foxy will ever recover after his last round of vaccinations has caused emotional anxiety. Foxy’s quality of life has continued to decline and we are now topping $5k on vet bills to keep him alive. At what point do we make the difficult decision as to whether or not to put Foxy down I have no idea as he’s been a part of our lives for fourteen years now and my husband becomes emotional even discussing the matter with the vet. 

    My heart was heavy leaving a crying husband behind in Fort Worth. Matthew has taken on the role of President at McBee Homes AND more importantly, additional responsibilities at work. Having Foxy become ill during this window certainly is bad timing of sorts because as anyone realizes job changes are stressful. I’m returning Foxy to VCA Thursday after a morning wedding at Lindsey State Jail. Each visit to VCA “starts at $1200 for blood work and additional tests.” My husband, Matthew is unconcerned about the cost. He is concerned about how “with our schedules we can continue to hand feed Foxy and administer medication?” He has a point. Hiring a pet nanny Foxy is unfamiliar with has been an escapade in futility.

    Arriving at Estelle Unit, I call Iris. Her daughter answers. Iris is already inside the Unit in the main building. Estelle has two buildings. High security and the main building. I’ve officiated weddings in both. 

    Iris had sent me a message about bringing her two year old daughter late Tuesday evening. Panicking since I was driving to three Units alone and had no one to sit with her daughter who wouldn’t be allowed inside, I sent a text to my 2PM Holliday Unit bride to ask if she could sit with the child. This might surprise a few of you but I knew my bride was in Huntsville spending the night and about twenty minutes from Estelle at her hotel. 

    My clients are amazing, loving and an army of warriors who know how difficult finding childcare on wedding day can be. I wasn’t at all surprised that my Holliday Unit bride immediately volunteered. 

    A few minutes later though, Iris sent a text that her adult daughter would be joining her and could watch the two year old while we were inside the Unit.

    Walking into Estelle, I hoped the rain would stop. Rain is the one thing that causes problems for my mini photo shoots. On more than one occasion, I’ve used hotel lobbies “on the fly.” 

    Iris looked beautiful in a blue dress and sexy multicolor shoes with a spike heel. I haven’t worn high heels in years but always admire a beautiful shoe. 

    As we waited for her fiancée to be escorted to the visitation area, Iris placed her house shoes under the bench and I walked into the wardens office to pay for three unit photos. Bringing an additional pair of shoes into the Unit for the long walk back to the parking lot was a smart idea. I always pack several pairs of shoes and sport coats when I have a multi Unit day myself. Why? Because each wedding is special and by changing my clothes and shoes I’m walking in fresh too. 

    A few months ago while traveling from Tennessee Colony Units to Holliday Unit to Polunsky, an investigative journalist was traveling with Cindy and I. Ella “noticed” my habit of changing jackets, jewelry and shoes and asked me about it. I explained that getting wrinkled and “travel worn” from one Unit to the next was and is why I feel more comfortable “freshening up” to meet my next client.

    The groom was excited and nervous and walked towards Iris and I. The moments I spend sharing my clients precious ceremonies are heartfelt and memorable.Leaving Estelle, I have Iris follow me to the Texas Prison Museum to meet Jarzmeine for bridal photos. I’m driving one of our Jeeps and have loaded a wide array of inventory.Because I’m leaving Holliday Unit to head to Livingston and meet my 5:30PM Polunsky bride, taking bridal photos of my Estelle and Holliday Unit brides at the museum works better with my tight schedule. Leaving the museum, Jarzmeine and I have time to grab lunch at Chili’s and buy a to go strawberry cheesecake for Jarzmeine to enjoy on her drive back to Louisiana. 

    The Unit is running a few minutes behind which “cuts into my timeline” to accompany Jarzmeine to the Walker County Clerks Office to file her license.After going over the certified license and how to send it to inmate records, I hug my beautiful new bride in the parking lot of TDCJ Holliday Unit and pray she travels in Grace.

    Driving on to Livingston, I take a call from a production company. Let’s review how researching me prior to contacting me is going to save us both a lot of time. First, I started Texas Twins Events to make Life Events affordable. Any event. Any client. When it became apparent that a small group of clients couldn’t afford to book in a traditional manner, I merged Texas Twins Events and Texas Twins Treasures to create a barter option, The Pawning Planners. I do not judge anyone. I do not ask why anyone is incarcerated. I welcome diversity and have neither the time or patience to educate someone who hasn’t researched me, my life, my clients or my business. I have 5 websites and encourage anyone contacting me to review them prior to “pitching me.” Here’s the list Texas Twins Events. The Pawning Planners. Texas Twins Treasures. Texas Twins TV. TDCJ Officiant.

    Arriving in Livingston, I text my bride to meet me at an abandoned gas station. There’s a lake near Polunsky that works great for bridal photos.We headed to the Unit following the photo shoot. My bride and I walked into the shakedown area together and waited on our visitor badges.

    The groom had memorized his heartfelt vows as had my bride who had written hers just in case she became too nervous to remember them.

    As I pulled out of Polunsky Unit for a long drive home, my full day of 3 Units and 3 amazing brides was spent sharing their joy of finally marrying.

    Arriving home at nearly 11PM, my husband has waited up on me with Foxy. Our dog was declining and I knew it. Matthew knew it too. Sadly a miracle for Foxy wasn’t going to happen. He had been refusing food and water. Foxy knew he was dying although we refused to accept this reality. I wish the vet had prepared us for this but instead we were given false hope. I have no idea why. More meds. More treatments. We danced to the routine of hand feedings and hope. Records of the next medication. Carrying Foxy outside to relieve himself. We expected a miraculous recovery. We expected too much.

    I had scheduled an appointment to follow up last weeks with VCA for Thursday after I returned from a morning wedding at Lindsey State Jail. Because my Allred Unit Client was in the hospital with bronchial phnuemonia, a reschedule at Allred freed me up to take Foxy in today rather than Thursday. Since December 23rd, Foxy had been steadily declining. Foxy had bladder cancer. I heard something while in my office signing contracts yesterday and found Foxy unable to stand. I picked him up and headed to VCA early. Foxy died in my arms resting his head on my husband’s lap. 

    Posted on

    Cold Feet, Warm Hearts And Fresh Starts. The Prison Wedding Planning Process Begins Again…

    Last August, just a few days before Eric was confirmed at TDCJ Crain Unit to marry, he called me to advise me that his bride had changed her mind about marrying. 

    This was surprising but not as uncommon as you might think. Why? 1% of inmates change their mind about marrying after being given a date to marry. Not the person on the outside but instead the person on the inside? Yes. A number of factors may be the reason for this change of heart but generally months or even years later, the inmate changes their mind to follow through with the wedding which is exactly what happened with Eric. He called to advise me that they were ready and the planning process started over again. 

    Eric is a really nice guy and I know he will make a great prison husband. We’ve had long talks about the struggles husbands and wives face from the outside. 

    Marrying an inmate is a commitment not to be taken lightly. The expenses and loneliness of being married to an inmate require stamina and finances. From expensive phone calls to long drives to the Unit to putting money on the books, my clients on the outside do it all and they do it alone. Single income households struggle to make it all work but they do. 

    Strangers and even other clients ask me frequently “why would these other clients choose to marry an inmate?” This question is better directed at my clients than at me. They know what they are in for and they accept the terms. 

    For years now, I’ve had strangers email or even mail me when they aren’t commenting on my posts that “they don’t believe inmates should have the right to marry or they don’t believe in LBGT marriage.” These narrow minded folks assume their opinions matter to either me, my staff or my clients. They don’t. 

    Our clients make the decision to marry. Our clients hire my staff to handle the planning and the ceremony. By the way, I have never had a problem on site at an LBGT event OR inmate wedding. No rude guests? No drunks? No idiotic demands? It’s a fact that the majority of our favorite events and the clients weren’t “traditional bookings.” Instead, the best times we’ve had on location are with LBGT clients, inmate clients and bartering clients. This unique and diverse group of clients are not only thankful for our help but also courteous to my staff, our children and grandchildren. Keep your opinions. Opinions aren’t our luggage and they aren’t our trip.

    When Cindy and I decided to start an Events business, our goal was to make Life Events affordable to ANYONE. Rebranding and expanding to offer bartering shocked folks but reaching ANY economic level required tenacity, creativity, dedication and drive. 

    The Pawning Planners opened a window that effectively “created an opportunity for low income families who couldn’t afford to pay for services to trade for services instead.” 

    Love knows no bounds and whether my client is marrying an inmate or marrying outside of the confinement’s of a prison or jail, the variations of their commitment are often surprising to outsiders. 

    “PEOPLE that FEAR the STORM, have NEVER lived THROUGH a DROUGHT.” God Bless Us All. 

    While one bride wants a room full of flowers with the perfect music and the perfect venue, another bride is sending me photos of what she plans to wear and asking me if it’s within the visitation dress code. There are no divas marrying an inmate. There is no one who has “been dreaming all their lives of marrying inside a prison or jail.” 

    My heart is with clients marrying an inmate rather than with the demanding divas who want perfection. I become their mother, their friend, their confidant. The Prison Wedding Planning Process is lengthy, confusing and extensive. It’s not uncommon for me to talk to clients throughout the planning process as well as after the wedding. Our relationship lasts long after their event. The majority of my inmate bookings rebook Vow Renewal services upon release to celebrate their love story with friends and family. They now have the cake, the guests, the music, the dress and the joy of life after lock up.  

    I’ve been in this industry many years and I’ve also met all and worked with all types of people from diverse backgrounds. The drama and chaos of “traditional weddings and brides demanding it all or being unreasonable” isn’t exactly a “good time on location for me or my staff.” 

    I’ve worked large events as a Planner and Officiant for up to 300 guests. I’ve been on site when brawls have broken out and arrests were made. The number of times I’ve also been interrupted by dip shit “guests” attempting to object during my ceremony is staggering. Who invited THAT guest? 

    You could easily say that I’ve seen it all at this point of my career in the events industry because quite frankly, I can’t think of anything I haven’t seen. From the commando guest in a short skirt that had one too many and her high kicks on the dance floor creating a “memorable moment” to the groom stuck in the patio lights during the traditional “toss” to the witness literally running from a bride after effectively voiding the license by scribbling out and changing her address not knowing the consequences of her error would infuriate the bride who was unaware that I could fix the issue by filing an Amended License until she allowed me to explain, the chaos and crazy moments could easily fill a book. 

    Cindy and I are “the fixers.” Experience and knowledge are important. A videographer suggested putting an emoji over “the flasher on the dance floor.” I insisted on him editing the video. 

    I’m picky about who I choose to work with now. I’ve had people change their date to accommodate my schedule too. If you want it all and don’t want to pay for it though, you are wasting my time as well as your own. Move along. I’m busy. 

    By the way, if you are at a wedding to object, you shouldn’t be there and if you are trying to interrupt my ceremony, I’m going to make an example of you in front of other guests and then escort you out myself. Sit down and shut up. If you can’t, stay home. 

    I no longer work “over the top events” for “people who found me on the internet” regardless of what the prospective client is willing to pay. Why? I don’t have to. I prefer the intimacy of inmate weddings and the joy of Vow Renewals with previous clients instead. There are no drunks. There are no divas. There is no drama. 

    From The Tardy Party Bride Who Lied in order to obtain a police discount to The Bouncing Checks Broken Tooth Bride to The Banjo Playing Ex Boyfriend Who Got The Boot, not only I but also my team have had some surprising things happen on location. All of these “surprises” were with traditional bookings. 

    The Tardy Party Bride was over an hour late to her own wedding and could not provide credentials for her discount either. 

    The Broken Tooth Bouncing Checks Bride wrote not one but two hot checks. While attempting discuss this matter on location, I was asked to glue her tooth. My finger became glued to the Broken Tooth. No good deed goes unpunished. My medical expenses for the damage of my finger proved that. The bride never did make good on her Bouncing Checks or her Broken Promises.

    A Fort Worth Stockyards wedding without adequate security found me knocked over a table. Wrong place wrong time or wrong clients unwilling to take my advice? Open Bars are bad ideas. Nearly every time an event has had an open bar there have been problems on site.

    Since returning from California, my dog Foxy has been in and out of the vet. One of our SUVs has been in and out of the shop. The beat goes on. Business and family are an everyday mix for me.I juggle clients from venues, Texas Twins Events, The Pawning Planners and Prisons as well as Jails in numerous states. I regularly turn down inquiries for large events or someone wanting an Elvis Impersonator. I’m not an impersonator. 

    “REALITY checks, aren’t GIVEN, with INSUFFICIENT funds.” If you want an Officiant, Planner and Impersonator, I can find one for you but get ready to pay for it. 

    Impersonators are expensive. I’m not opposed to dressing up or wearing themed clothing within reason but if you want me to swivel my hips wearing Elvis attire, sorry buddy you’ve got the wrong person. 

    Last year I bought camo clothing after being asked by my client for a Pawning Planners Event. This was a first since I’ve never owned anything camouflage in my life but, my bride REALLY wanted me in camo to officiate so… I worked it out and found an outfit.

    Working as a planner for ONE CLIENT and spending months addressing their every whim when I can easily plan and officiate up to 20 weddings a month instead? I will take the 20 happy clients over the one problem client any day of the year. No amount of money is worth dealing with a Diva to me. 

    I don’t enjoy spending months listening to spoiled brides who “want it all”  who don’t realize that they “do not have the budget for all of it.” Princesses or Bridezillas don’t understand that everyone has limits even me. Let these folks tie someone else down while expecting them to pay for the rope because I’m too busy for Demanding Diva’s. 

    Years ago I took on problem clients but those days are gone forever. No more  miserably counting the days to their event down for me. No thanks, I have happy clients and a good time now. No divas. No demanding mothers. No midnight phone calls about what they want that they haven’t paid for. Goodbye and good luck to them. They are far too much work. 

    I’ve met plenty of Diva’s and I’ve learned they take up far too much of my time AND my patience. Time is money. Experience matters. You learn where your time is better spent. I did. It’s well spent with people who matter. Ask anyone in sales how much time and money problem clients cost them if you don’t believe me. I can assure you they will be quick to enlighten you. 

    At an event a few years ago where the client had hired an Officiant, you can imagine my shock when her mother called to tell me “you have a team. We want two photographers, help with caterers and a set up and tear down team. I’m going to need you on site for eight hours.” 

    Stunned, I skipped a beat before replying “an Officiant is on site for an hour. You have not paid for two photographers or a set up and tear down team or assistance with catering. Lady, I’m going to give you a wake up call and a bill for WHAT YOU WANT in order to WAKE YOU UP.” That lady was an arrogant idiot. If she planned on having volunteers for her daughters wedding at MY expense, she apparently couldn’t read or understand my contract or both. I don’t work without a contract.

     I’m really good at saying no listening to surprisingly stupid suggestions, demands or desires from “entitled idiots” who think they make the rules. I’ve had plenty of experience. You want 10 people on site for 8 hours when you’ve paid for 1 person on location for 1 hour? Come on! Pull out your checkbook or put on an apron and serve the food yourself or find your own “volunteers.” 

    The Tardy Party Bride and her posse literally pushed me to the limit. Yes, even I have limits. Thirty phone calls, text messages and emails were sent to me after that fiasco of a wedding and after being lied to. In part due to her harassment, I sued The Tardy Party Bride. We were on Hot Bench in 2015. I had filed the suit in Tarrant County. After being contacted by the show, we both agreed to fly to California. The episode? “Don’t Call Me Bridezilla.” Don’t act like one and I won’t. I won the case. I always “overprepare.”

    “Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.” Abraham Lincoln

    If lying in order to gain a financial advantage for yourself seems “okay to you” here’s a heads up, it isn’t. Also, late fees are listed in my contracts. Why? Because I’m busy that’s why. Your tardiness affects my timeline.

    Being a diva on wedding day and forcing your guests and your vendors to wait over an hour is selfish. 

    If you aren’t active or retired military, fire, police, first responder or a teacher, don’t lie to me to benefit yourself by receiving a 20% discount you aren’t entitled to. That’s called Theft Of Services. The Tardy Party Bride was a Bridezilla. She not only lied to get that discount but also refused to come out of the dressing room for nearly an hour and a half on wedding day. Her tardiness affected my ability to be on time and on site with three other clients the same day. Her anger regarding my request to view her credentials? Priceless. She didn’t care that her tardiness had a domino effect to my schedule or my other clients. Selfish people never do. 

    Weddings are Life Events. Regardless of where the wedding takes place. I spend a large amount of my time traveling from Fort Worth, Texas to locations hours away. Traveling is a very important aspect of my role.  Monday, I’m back at Green Bay Unit and Parker County Jail. Tuesday, I head out early to Huntsville to begin my day at Estelle Unit at 11:15. From there? Bridal photos and lunch before heading to Holliday Unit at 2PM. Bridal photos with my client will follow before driving to Polunsky and meeting my last client in Livingston, Texas at 5:30PM. It will be another 13-15 hour day of driving for me. Two cities. Three Units. Three clients. One day. Next week I have 7 clients in 4 days alone. Huntsville and Livingston Tuesday. Iowa Park Wednesday. Jacksboro Thursday. Lamesa Friday. Traditional bookings take place on weekends.

    I’m always asked about why I offer bridal photography or why I invested in creating an extensive inventory to loan our booked clients for their events and photo shoots, the photos of my happy clients speak for themselves. 

    Bouquets, furs, tiaras, fascinators and more? You bet! We bring a trunk load of our Texas Twins Treasures inventory to all of our events. Not just 1 or 2 bouquets but up to 10? Absolutely. Our clients often bring friends or family to their photo shoot and we make sure there are enough bouquets, bouteniers, tiaras, fascinators, furs and fun stuff for large groups. 

    My staff and I are dedicated to making Dream Events a reality to such an extent that I add to our inventory year round and have even loaned clothing to clients who asked. I want your day as special as you are. Finding time to squeeze in mini photo shoots with clients on a multiple booking date is tricky but worth it. Clients often tell me that their photo shoot was the best part of their day.

    Wednesday I’m in Iowa Park at TDCJ Allred Unit.

    Thursday I’m in Jacksboro, Texas at Lindsey State Jail.

    Friday I meet two clients at TDCJ Smith Unit. Raymon and Jeremy have waited months to marry. Raymond and Jeremy are also the first male LBGT couple I will marry in a Texas Prison. I’ve married several female couples in Texas Prisons but male couples are rare for reasons I don’t understand. Outside of prisons, a large portion of my clients are LBGT. For the first few years of Texas Twins Events, nearly all of our clients were LBGT. My affiliation and support of the community is well known. My clients are also my friends.

    I look forward to finally meeting Eric in person at TDCJ Crain Unit. Like Eric, I believe a happy ending of a new beginning awaits him. Prison Weddings are Rainbows In The Dark…