Crain Unit, Country County Clerks, Chaos & Coming To The Rescue? Travels Of The Texas Twins…

Last night while at the Aladdin movie with my twin sister and twin grandnieces, a text from my Ferguson Unit bride asking “if I ever give rides to my clients” came through. With Makenna telling me “turn off my phone,” I walked out of the theater to call Savannah. In my line of work, there aren’t any “off days.” Cindy followed me out of the theater. We both have tight schedules and getting a text on a holiday is a literal “heads  up Houston because we may have a problem moment.” 

I need to know what’s going on in order to plan and prepare accordingly. All of my clients realize this because I reiterate it over and over again. Keeping me “in the loop” keeps you from encountering problems. I cannot fix what I’m unaware of.  If you are sitting in your car crying because the clerk wouldn’t issue your marriage license, CALL ME. If your car broke down and you don’t know how you are going to get three hours from home to a Unit, CALL ME. If you aren’t sure about what you plan to wear being okay, text me a photo. 

On a handful of occasions (based on the distance and my schedule), I’ve driven a few of my clients to their Unit Wedding and taken them home again. 

Certain clients are also very uncomfortable about driving in the country where deer freely bounce in herds across the road. Just call me, I will pick you up at your hotel near the Unit. I work with you to limit your anxiety. Stay calm. I’m not intimidated by a herd of deer. Cindy isn’t either. 

I also have a friend that has a transportation to and from Prison Unit based business. If you need her contact information, just let me know. She is based out of Houston and owns AM Transportations. She is also happy to help you by driving you to a visit or your wedding. I trust her to take great care of you. Remember though, there is a fee for this rideshare service. 

Based on your distance from my location to you and the Unit, there can be a fee for me to pick you up as well. Sadly, there isn’t a “gas fairy” filling up my tank. 

It’s rare for me to be a shuttle driver but it’s happened before and may happen again. Be aware that I’m based in Fort Worth though so I’m not going to drive to Houston to pick you up to go to Tennessee Colony. If you are more than one hour from my location, I will need you to use public transportation to get as close as possible to the Unit. Your officiant fee DOES NOT cover transportation. I will work with you to find a solution but remember I have several clients that warrant my time and attention. 

No one “plans” car trouble on wedding day. Once I’ve confirmed a wedding date with the Unit, we really need to honor the schedule. If you are having an emergency, please let me know ASAP so that I can notify the Unit and reschedule your date well within 48 hours. 

Rescheduled ceremony dates can and do give cause to the Unit to REQUIRE a new I60 and the entire process of getting permission to marry to start all over again. There’s a reason I frown upon reschedules. The reason is that the clock may very well start ticking all over again. I strongly encourage you to show up on a scheduled and confirmed wedding date because you’ve waited months to get that date. The next date (if you have rescheduled your original date) might not be as “easy to change as you think.” It most cases, it isn’t. Also, my own schedule is quite tight. If I’ve “held a date for you only to have you change it at the last minute,” you are effectively put back in line behind my other clients waiting on dates. There is no line jumping. Confirmed dates are important to the Unit. They are accommodating us into THEIR SCHEDULE. 

Line jumping “because you’ve changed your mind regarding a date” affects everyone else on my books. Please be courteous and understand that you are NOT my ONLY client. 

I’m generally juggling 10-20 clients per month planning prison weddings in Texas alone. We also service county jails and other states as well as Texas Twins Events Clients AND Pawning Planners Clients AS WELL as venues that I’m on staff at. “Changing your mind less than 48 hours before a confirmed event” affects everyone on my books. That “particular date” could have been used for another client after all. 

A few years ago, I needed a ride from Allred Unit myself. It’s highly irregular for me to need a ride. In fact, I doubt it Kay ever happen again. What happened? An ice storm had came through North Texas. I don’t drive on ice and had decided to take a Greyhound bus to Wichita Falls. The bus station in Wichita Falls had closed due to inclement weather and effectively left me afoot. No taxis and bad luck were making it look as if I would be finding a hotel. 

Thankfully, my wonderful new bride and her mother and new mother in law gave me a ride back to Fort Worth and my SUV at the Greyhound station. 

Hitching a ride can work in most cases and only takes a certain amount of “working it out” based on scheduling. If I can’t accommodate your needs, I can help locate public transportation or AM Transportations to get you where you need to be. 

Last year, my Estes bride was coming from Houston on Greyhound and needed a lift to the Unit. We enjoyed breakfast with my family at Ole South Pancake House before driving to Venus, Texas. Estes is nearly an hour from Fort Worth and my new friend and I had a great day together. After leaving Estes, I drove to the Fort Worth Botanic Garden to get bridal photos before driving my client back to Greyhound. 

Occasionally, I’m at more than one Unit on the same day. Taking a moment to look at my schedule next week, I told Savannah “I will need to leave Fort Worth to pick you up in Dallas by 9AM. There’s road construction of 45 so the estimated timeline of 2 and a half hours to Ferguson is incorrect. We need to leave Dallas 3 hours earlier in order to arrive with plenty of time to clear into the Unit.” I’m ALWAYS looking at timelines. 

Savannah had offered to meet me in Grand Prairie which is closer to my location. However, Savannah also wanted me to meet her in Dallas the following day (Thursday) to file her license (because she was uncomfortable having me file it and the clerk mailing it to her) I decided that I would drive her to the Unit and get bridal photos arriving early near Ferguson, perform the wedding, return to Dallas, file the license with her and THEN take her home. 

Thankfully, on the day of her wedding, I’m not scheduled at another Unit. Because I’m not, I have time to accommodate her need for a ride. 

I make exceptions frequently but, my schedule is key to “working it out.” If I have more than one Unit on the same day of another Unit wedding, the client needing a lift will be spending the entire day with me. I cannot “alter my schedule” to run you home. 

Let’s review more than one Unit in one day. I call this “Unit Stacking.” If your Unit is within 1-2 hour of another Unit, I stack the secondary Unit. If there is more than one client at the same Unit, you MUST ARRIVE on time in order to accommodate other clients. 

I’m going to catch everyone up on why I send you to cities to purchase a marriage license ONE MORE TIME. Coryell County Clerk now requires you to have a birth certificate, TDCJ ID and Absentee Affidavit. 

Crain Unit WILL NOT SEND the TDCJ ID or Absentee Affidavit and much less BOTH anywhere other than the courthouse. This is ongoing issue with Crain. On yet another phone call to the law library pertaining to two of my clients needing these documents in order to purchase their marriage licenses, the clerk at Crain literally told me “we will not send an ID to anyone other than the clerks office.” 

My suggestion FOR ALL CRAIN CLIENTS is to have Crain send the documents to ANY clerk other than Coryell County. 

Since April, Gary has been to Coryell County at least three times attempting to purchase a marriage license. The combination of Crain Unit and their refusal to mail the required documents to purchase a marriage license to the grooms (or brides) like every other Unit TDCJ Unit does along with the Coryell County Circus stipulations that no other County Clerk in Texas has have continued to “hold up the prison wedding planning process.” I’ve alerted the Courts In Huntsville to the fiasco regarding Crain refusing to mail the documents necessary to buy a marriage license to the people on the outside attempting to do so. 

Traditionally, the inmate will visit the law library to order a TDCJ ID. The person on the outside will send an Absentee Affidavit which will be notarized in the Law Library and mailed to the person on the outside to purchase the marriage license. 

Why Units “change things up” I have no idea. BUT a few Units do. If we cannot overcome their process, we instead hunker down and spend months going through THEIR process. 

Thankfully, Gary FINALLY has a birth certificate. Eric and Gary, I cannot wait to finally meet you both in person and get you married. Gary it’s been a process and had Crain simply allowed Aimee to mail you her ID and Absentee Affidavit, you could have easily purchased a marriage license in Harris County without going through repeated visits to Coryell. Smaller counties continue to make their own rules.

Last year, another client arrived to meet me at the Coryell County Courthouse for his photo shoot prior to driving to the Unit for the wedding. He had driven from Austin. He had also assumed that I had a “copy” of his license. There are no copies of the ORIGINAL marriage license. Only the person purchasing the marriage license has the marriage license. There is only one marriage license. PLEASE BRING IT WITH YOU. After your marriage license is signed by me AND filed at the clerks office, you can purchase a Certified Copy Of Your Marriage License. 

Since a question of name changing being automatic after marriage “came up” last week, your name is not “automatically changed because you are married.” Changing your name AFTER marriage is a legal process. To perform the process, you will take your marriage license AFTER I’ve signed it and filed it with the clerks office to the DMV to change your name. You will then go to SS to update your name there as well. The DMV has a fee associated with your new drivers license. I.E. it’s not free to change your state issued ID to reflect your new name. 

YOU MUST BRING your VALID ID and MARRIAGE LICENSE to Unit weddings at Prisons. We are on site specifically for a legal marriage. If you do not have the documentation, there will not be a wedding. Your Unit wedding will be rescheduled. Getting married at a prison is a process. However, getting your marriage license shouldn’t be as complicated as “country clerks” and a few TDCJ law libraries are making it out to be. For years now, I’ve sent my clients to CITIES to purchase marriage licenses. Country clerks in small towns are wholly and entirely unfamiliar with inmate marriage. Unless of course, the clerk is in a town near a prison unit in which case they may be aware of the legal rights for inmates to marry but, you are taking a chance if you don’t bother calling first I can assure you. 

A few days ago, my Ellis Unit bride, Amanda went to buy her marriage license in Eastland, Texas. The clerk refused to accept the documentation that ANY city clerk would. Amanda called me. Amanda had also taken the Twogether In Texas course that waives the three day waiting period. Since she’s marrying at Ellis Unit Tuesday, I suggested buying the marriage license from Huntsville on the morning of her wedding scheduled at 1PM and then filing it in Huntsville rather than trying to convince Eastland of her right to purchase a marriage license. 

I send you to cities because I’m all too aware of the issues that country clerks have put other clients through. How? Because like you, everyone else called me when they couldn’t buy a license too. Yes, my phone rings all day long and my role is to solve problems. I excel at problem solving on a regular basis. 

If you are near Dallas or Fort Worth, both counties are familiar with Absentee Affidavits and inmate marriage as is Harris County, Travis County, Bell County and many others. City clerks are friendly and helpful. Country clerks continue to upset clients by telling them they cannot buy a marriage license unless the absent applicant is armed forces. 

There’s a reason I’m sending you to a city. A few months ago, my Hobbs New Mexico bride was having problems getting a license and called me. I mapped out the closest clerks to her location and called them PRIOR to sending her to buy the license. Lubbock County issued the license. 

If you are having problems buying your license, contact me. Officiating your wedding involves FAR MORE THAN SIMPLY SHOWING UP. I cannot stress this point enough to ANYONE planning to marry an inmate. 

Everyone it seems is hopping on the TDCJ Officiant bandwagon but, not everyone knows how to solve unexpected problems. I do. I also keep my promises. The role of an Officiant pertaining to inmate marriage can be and is all encompassing. From a mother figure to the maid of honor to a bridesmaid to a photographer to a planner to an Officiant, my role covers every base. 

I hold your hand through a very confusing and lengthy process because I’m well aware that marrying an inmate isn’t “simple” and much less cut or dry.  A few weeks ago, LeBlanc refused to Approve a wedding for one of my clients because “the inmate is already listed as being married and therefore not entitled to a marriage ceremony.” I called the Chaplain and after a lengthy conversation, called the Courts in Huntsville to overcome the issue. Knowing how to address unexpected issues is part of the prison wedding process. If you are entrusting your prison wedding to someone who THINKS showing up on wedding day encompasses THEIR ROLE, you have hired the wrong person. When you run into a problem though, you will call me. I fix problems. I know how to. I’m seasoned and experienced. I know Procedures and Policies. For everyone else assuming that officiating a prison wedding is easy and they can do it too, good luck to you and please don’t call me to tell you how to perform a task you have no idea to do. 

I’m not in the “training others to compete with me business.” I’m in the wedding and event business and I know every aspect of my job or role. No one trained me. I educated myself to all aspects of any business I’ve ever worked in including prison weddings. I’m not going to train you either. 

For a few years now, other TDCJ Officiants have asked me to refer them my clients. Sorry kids, I trained my family members instead. Two generations of my family now handle prison weddings that I don’t have time to address myself in numerous states. They are educated to unexpected issues as well because I’ve trained them to be. Nearly once a week someone contacts me to “teach them how to do what I do.” I’m not about to create competition that doesn’t exist because you took the time to ask me to do so. I’m busy addressing my clients. 

For months now, undoing a CLM status at Telford Unit in order to obtain Approval to marry was another issue. It was also one that was overcome. Hire someone knowledgeable. I can’t stress this enough. I’ve been the 2nd and even 3rd Officiant my clients hired because they initially hired the wrong person. 

In certain circumstances like Hobby Unit, I’ve been hired AFTER a client has paid “other Officiants” not once but twice. I not only married her but even drove this client from Grand Prairie to Hobby and back again! This poor lady trusted not one but two other Officiants who let her down. I AM RELIABLE and trustworthy. If I tell you I’m going to do something, you can bet that I am. Unlike “other officiants” I exceed my clients expectations which is why I’m so sought after in this industry. I also took my Hobby Unit bride to lunch and shot her bridal photos on the way back to Grand Prairie. I’ve had questions regarding retakes of Unit photos. Please do not complain about the quality of Unit photos. Guards are not professional photographers. They are doing the best they can with the equipment they have. 

Holiday Unit is hit and miss on photos. We may have good photos at one wedding and fuzzy photos at the next. If you are on Instagram looking through Unit photos on my account and not paying attention to the Unit, the reason that Estes photos are clear is that they are emailed. The photo quality of emailed photos is crisper than printed photos.

McConnell does a great job on photos as does Hodge. Michael also has great photos too but, the ONLY photos we are going to have of you with the inmate are going to be Unit photos so please do not send complaints about your Unit photos to the Unit or the Courts. 

Outdoor photos and white clothing create a glare. This cannot be overcome. Overexposed photos are due in part to the camera as well as sunlight. Certain Units like Ferguson now have a disclaimer regarding photo quality they go over with us prior to taking photos at your wedding. They are doing the best that they can. 

Poses for photos. I will pose you for Unit photos. Don’t worry about how to pose at the Unit. I know you are nervous and in certain cases like the photo below, guards will hand me the camera to take the photo myself. I’m very familiar with photography and poses and want you to have the best photos you can at your Unit wedding. 

We cannot control the quality of your Unit photos. What I can do is give you beautiful wedding photos taken with me and my inventory before or after your ceremony to ensure you have beautiful photos to remember your wedding day. I’m at several Units in the coming weeks and looking forward to finally meeting all of you at your prison wedding. While getting your paperwork and buying your license can be somewhat stressful, pat yourself on the back because you’ve finally made it through the process. 

It’s a lengthy process but, you chose an Officiant (me) who walked you through the process and held your hand for weeks or even months and in the Torres Unit case, waited for over a year to finally meet you at your Prison Wedding. We did it. You’re married now. It wasn’t easy and it took time  (a year) but, you made it. Questions about the glass continue to roll in. If the inmate is G4 or G5, there will be glass. Accept this because the glass will be a part of your ceremony. It pains me as much as it pains you that your wedding will not be “sealed with a kiss” but, it’s something that cannot be changed.

I’m back at Holiday Unit in the coming weeks and will once again go over why wearing loose fitting clothing subjects you to a search. Although tight fitting clothing is not permitted, loose fitting clothing can hide many things which is why wearing a loose fitting, flowing garment will require a more thorough pat down in the privacy of the restroom. 

If you arrive at your prison wedding in a oversized garment or dress, be prepared to be asked to go into the restroom. 

Please do not argue with TDCJ personnel regarding this request for a private pat down. It’s actually not a request. 

We are on site and the entire Unit is accommodating your request to marry at a prison. Attire is outlined under the visitation dress code. Your attire on wedding day falls under the same guidelines. If your clothing is loose, you will be asked to go into the bathroom with a guard. If you are wearing an underwire bra or corset, you will also be asked to go into the restroom. You MUST CLEAR INTO THE UNIT. 

If you are wearing a weave, clips, pins or other metal items in your hair, you will be asked to remove them. DO NOT GET UPSET. We must clear into the Unit. 

Veils are allowed but must not cover your face. Veils must be worn in the fashion below with the fabric going over your back not pulled over the front. Hair clips, bobby pins, crowns, tiaras, fascinators, wigs, weaves, hairpieces and extensions containing metal products must be removed. Please be aware of this. You will be allowed to go into the restroom and put your hair back up or on. 

If you need assistance with your hair, I can help you after we’ve both cleared into the Unit. But, clearing the machine is a REQUIREMENT. Any metal products are going to set off the machine. From underwire bras to girdles or corsets, the wires are going to set off the machine. 

Wearing white. I’ve had many questions about my Estes bride wearing all white. She also wore a red scarf into the visitation area that was removed for her ceremony and put back on when leaving the visitation area. 

Inmates wear all white. Because of this, you will need to add another color to your attire on wedding day. Whether it’s a cami, scarf, or other item, it needs to be a color that isn’t white. 

I’m on site all weekend with traditional clients and rather than using FB or Instagram messaging, request that you text or email me as I’m rarely on social media on weekends. Thanks. 

Learning Curves- When Love Isn’t Enough & Other Factors In The Prison Wedding Planning Process…

For several weeks now, I’ve been talking to one of my brides about not only her concerns but my own as well regarding marrying an inmate that she’s only “known since December.” The inmate is somewhat manipulative and controlling which highly concerns me. 

Yesterday’s phone call came while I was going down the list of calls to Chaplains and law libraries for several clients waiting on I60’s to be processed. I took a break to listen to Samantha’s concerns and scheduling at Jordan Unit. The inmate had requested a transfer to another Unit which effectively puts a “hold” on wedding scheduling. This “hold” would help give Samantha time to re evaluate marrying. 

Samantha had called me to advise me that the transfer had been denied. After twenty minutes of discussing whether or not Samantha wanted to move forward, it was decided that we would “stall this wedding” until July or August due to a number of things that the inmate was doing to control her life from behind bars. 

Let’s go over a few of these “issues” to better grasp the red flags flying high in what should be a joyous journey for the bride on the outside but, in Samantha’s situation, isn’t. 

A few weeks ago, on another phone call, Samantha told me that the inmate had her sending $200 a month “for their future.” I found this not only odd but also manipulative and voiced my concerns. I also listened carefully about other problems in the relationship. What were they? First, the inmate didn’t want Samantha to wear makeup or “look too attractive.” Samantha is a waitress and her appearance is important. Also, the inmate didn’t want Samantha to take her children swimming because “you will be wearing a bathing suit and I don’t want other men hitting on you.” The monetary demands along with Samanthas “life on the outside” were greatly being affected by the inmate who was also in a hurry to get married. The “hurry” was for the inmate to have more control. 

Slowing this wedding down was in Samantha’s best interest. In fact, canceling it would be in her best interest but, I can only give my clients advice. It’s not my role to tell them who not to marry. I carefully advise clients without overstepping bounds. I also point out things they may not realize while I’m at it. With Samantha, I’ve been worrying about her future for a month now. 

Meanwhile, my Diboll Unit bride has decided not to marry. She sent me a text last night wanting to gift her new with tags size 12 petite dress to another bride in an effort “to be part of the reason they smile on wedding day.” I found this selfless act while struggling with her own heartbreak just another reason of why my prison clients are such giving and compassionate individuals. 

For those unaware of this, the person “on the outside” is doing time too. They are pulling the wagon alone. They are paying all of the bills, raising children and making every sacrifice to make their relationship work. It’s astounding how determined and resilient they are. For Gabriella, her desire to give a dress she loved and planned to marry in herself is a wholly generous and selfless proposition. 

My clients are both passionate and perseverant. I pray that one day Gabriella finds someone worthy of her. When she does, I will marry her. 

After months of overcoming a CLM issue at TDCJ Telford Unit, I’m really looking forward to finally meeting my bride in August. CLM or CLW issues DRAMATICALLY slow the usual timelines of 4-6 weeks turnaround down. In fact, we can wait months to resolve an unexpected issue. Patience is a virtue in the prison wedding planning process. Knowing how to overcome an unexpected issue is key to moving forward. I find solutions. 

I’m headed back to Torres Unit in Hondo, Texas and looking forward to meeting two special brides who also plan to marry on the same day. My McConnell brides are too. 

Cindy and I are really looking forward to seeing Amanda again at Ellis Unit. We had met her a few months ago for family photos in Eastland, Texas and had a great time on location with my grandnieces and her children playing together. 

Many of my brides are sending me photos of what they plan to wear. This is always a great idea and I’m happy to go over your outfit with you. My Crain and Woodman Grooms don’t need to do this as they will be wearing dress shirts and slacks well within TDCJ guidelines. Please do not bring paper money on wedding day to purchase photos. Bring quarters. Unit photos are $3 each. I will buy three and make copies for you. If you wish to buy more, bring your quarters in a ziplock bag and do not bring more than $21 into the Unit. No cell phones. No paper money. No cameras. You MUST BRING your state issued ID or Passport AND your marriage license. If you have handwritten vows, hand them to me PRIOR to entry.  

I’d like to wish all of my July clients from years gone by a Happy Anniversary. I remember all too well how nervous and excited you were on wedding day. We’ve shared precious moments together on location. Meeting your families and sharing your joy is a gift to not only myself but also my staff. 

I am often asked “what I remember the most on location at events?” I remember my clients smiles, their joy and their immense gratitude at finding the love of their life. Soul mates are difficult to find but, my clients did. I remember being hugged walking up to you and how happy you were that the day had finally come. 

Weddings are and will always be my favorite events. Vow Renewals are equally joyous as are baptisms but seeing our families again for a celebration whether it’s the birth of a child or a Vow Renewal or even a birthday party is a family reunion for my Team and I. Clients are the fabric of our lives. Many people are surprised at how often previous clients rebook but they shouldn’t be. Our clients have established a bond with us. In many cases even a death in their family is a rebooking for a celebrant and planner at their loved ones memorial. 

I will always remember how joyous Burt and Deanna were on their wedding day. It had been raining in the park they chose to marry in. The tulips hadn’t bloomed so Burt planted imitation tulips. Burt paid attention to the details. Burt and his friends from Carswell AFB had also draped fabric from the trees. 

Two years after marrying Burt & Deanna, an email from Deanna trying to locate me through Gig Salad came in. “You married us and you may not remember us. We are a military couple from Carswell AFB. We need your help. We want you to baptize our baby.” Because Gig Salad limits correspondence unless the client books you, I was unable to share my phone number or contact information with Deanna. But, I easily located her phone number after walking into my home office and pulling files for the three years of weddings to locate my client records for Deanna. 

I keep detailed records of client correspondence and bookings. I quickly sent a text to tell her I would call her. She excitedly told me “we are pregnant and I wouldn’t want anyone but you to baptize our baby. Please tell me you will be available to Bless our child. We are overjoyed at this miracle.” 

Thinking to myself ” I WILL MAKE time,” I checked my schedule. Cindy and I were traveling back and forth to California as we were filming This Time Next Year but I went ahead and told Deanna that “if I needed to catch a flight from LAX to DFW on short notice I could fly to DFW and back to LAX in order to accommodate Burt and Deanna’s request.” 

I’m constantly checking distances and scheduling. The flights from DFW to LAX are easy and quick. I always leave a car at DFW and have a rental waiting at LAX. Fluidity and planning ahead are key to addressing our numerous clients. There isn’t a day that goes by I’m not checking distance from one prison unit to the next to see if I can move from Unit A to B and even C on the same day. I map out my timelines over and over again. If a Unit is within 2 hours of a booked Unit, it’s usually doable. But if the secondary Unit is 3 or more hours from the booked Unit, we must look at the next available date instead. 

Booked Prison Unit Dates are non moveable. Once I’ve confirmed a date, it’s literally “set in stone” at a prison. 

A few months later while in my home office preparing a ceremony for a house blessing, Deanna called me again. This phone call was far from the joyous earlier call. This call was drought with sad news. Deanna was crying. Baby Delilah phone had Trisomy and Deanna needed me to be able to get to Harris Hospital on short notice as Delilah was only expected to live a few short hours. I was crushed. 

In fact, I was speechless. I’d never heard of Trisomy. I grabbed a Merck Manual to educate myself. I can’t imagine how Deanna must have felt at her OB/GYN appointment during that check up. I couldn’t imagine how carrying a child with the odds of survival being so slim would affect anyone as joyous at conceiving as Deanna was could accept this devastating blow. I mourned for her. I grieved for the child that had blessed their marriage. I prayed. I also prepared. 

For a number of years, I was a volunteer hospice clergy at area hospitals. Sadly, the stress and reality of many patients facing death was simply too much for me mentally. I stopped volunteering after at Baylor and Harris. How doctors handle death daily it I have no idea.

Deanna had added “we will also need you to perform the memorial. Burt and I wouldn’t want anyone other than the person who married us to handle such an emotional and important role.” My heart sank. I knew how difficult it must have been for Deanna to place that call to me. I also knew that as she carried the baby she so desperately wanted that she was hoping for a miracle. I did too. I prayed Delilah would defy the odds. I would continue to pray for months. 

A few months later, the call came. Cindy and I were scheduled at Iheart radio in Dallas. We went to see Burt and Deanna first to check timelines of Delilahs possible birth. There was time to run to Dallas and return to Fort Worth. Cindy and I dashed through our interviews to run back to Burt and Deanna. Delilah was tiny. The smallest baby I’ve ever seen. Cindy and I were surprised by the number of Carswell military members in the room. 

Beyond Deanna’s bed were at least 15-20 AFB coworkers of Burt and Deanna. They were all crying. A room packed with crying soldiers is something you won’t forget. The sadness in the room literally sucked the air from my lungs. I tried to breathe deeply and focus on staying professional and remembering my role walking into that room and past the mourners. Hats in hand, their silent tears said it all. You could hear a pin drop and sniffles over the machines and medical equipment. 

Holding my composure and emotions inside in order to perform the bedside baptism was incredibly difficult. At that moment, I still harbored hope that Delilah would make it. Cindy looked at me from the back of the room with the military personnel to give me the “don’t cry. Your role is to comfort” pep talk as she too wiped away her tears. Cindy knew I was terrified of losing my composure. We had discussed it over and over again. 

Minutes after the above photo was taken, Burt and Deanna told me “we only have a few hours.” I was again literally crushed. I was also enlightened as to why Delilah wasn’t in an incubator. 

By the time I lifted baby Delilah to perform her baptism, my sorrow was so profound that my tears dropped silently on the child this couple had so desperately wanted. I couldn’t hide my sadness. 

A few days later, I performed baby Delilahs memorial wearing the same vestment that I had married Burt and Deanna in. Deanna had asked that I wear the same thing I had met them wearing two years prior at Sampson Park. Delilah wore a gown handcrafted from Deanna’s wedding dress. 

I remember staying up all night working on my ceremony. The details of how I had met the Villareals. The moment of Burt happily walking up to me. The look on his face as Deanna approached us. The man gently playing guitar behind us. The sun breaking through the grey summer day bringing light and promise. I remember every aspect of any ceremony that I’ve ever performed. 

Life Events are Life Moments. Saying goodbye to Delilah was the hardest ceremony that I’ve ever performed in my life as an Officiant, Planner and Celebrant. 

My role is to comfort families as a celebrant but, it was difficult to mask my own emotions. Loss always is. Death is a dark stranger but the death of a child is and always will be the most difficult role that I have ever played. 

Deanna never recovered from the loss of Delilah. I doubt she ever will. She has lost the ability to try to conceive again. Burt and Deanna are praying that they can adopt. I’m praying for them. They are wonderful people who would joyously love to parent a child together. 

The relationship I share with my clients is remarkably intimate. They trust myself and my Team to understand their journey. For some, the journey is far more difficult. Surprises. Setbacks. No one expects them but, whether you are planning an elaborate event or planning a prison wedding, there can be extraordinary circumstances that you didn’t expect. Rain at an outdoor venue. A transfer of the inmate less than 24 hours before their scheduled wedding. These things are beyond our control but, we will work through them together. 

For others like Samantha or Gabriella, they might need a kind word or even advice. I’m there for them. I listen to their concerns. I guide them. They need someone to listen. For my prison wedding clients, it’s not uncommon for them to tell me “you are the only person I can talk to.” In many cases, I am. 

Making arrangements and smoothing the path is my specialty. It’s very important to me that clients aren’t worried about things I can address on their behalf. Experience matters. I’m in the Life Events business. There are no do overs. My events are as humanly close to perfect as possible. Cindy and I give others the weddings we never had ourselves. We care far more than anyone realizes because we know how important the details are to our clients. 

I cried at Delilahs memorial and I cried at her baptism. I cried for the child my clients so desperately wanted but couldn’t keep. I will never forget the moments I’ve shared with any of my couples. 

Perhaps I’m different because I care so much but my clients are all like my own children. I want what’s best for all of them. I want them happy. I celebrate their successes and I mourn their losses. I pray Burt and Deanna find a baby to adopt and shower with love.

A special anniversary wish for my ladies who shared a friendship ceremony a few years ago goes out to three amazing ladies. 

Two of these ladies I married to each other and one of these three friends is still waiting to find the right partner. They are out there Lorraine and I know that one day you too will find a life partner.Bouncing from exclusive venues to Prisons, backyards, parks and other interesting and varied locations throughout wedding season keeps me from ever being bored. Cindy and I love to load up and hit the road on our way to meet amazing clients. 

Our Huntsville client who contacted us through The Pawning Planners several weeks ago loves her photos and is still trying to find Mr Right. We never did find a way to effectively “flip the two headed fox stole” she had bartered in exchange for her photo shoot. If you are interested in a two headed fox stole missing an eyeball, PLEASE give us a shout. We ship AND deliver. This stole needs a new home. 

If you missed the blog on the Huntsville client and the unique circumstances of her request for services, here’s the link– The Pawning Planners- Turning Trash Into Treasure. More Flips, Flops & Fun Adventures.

We have several Vow Renewals coming up over the next two years from previous prison clients who have contacted us to schedule. A special shout out of congratulations to my Darrington, Estes, Coffield, Michael, Bridgeport, Estelle, Hobby and Stiles Unit clients who have excitedly shared their good news with me. We look forward to seeing ya all again soon. 

One of my clients from Michael Unit wanted to plan her Vow Renewal for ten years away. This IS UNUSUAL. Another client I married a few months ago who asked me to wear camouflage attire to her wedding also has scheduled for ten years away. Good Lord, I hope I’m still alive. 

Ten years out is a lifetime away but, God willing, my Team and I will honored to see you all again.

From prisons to venues and everywhere in between, I’ve decided to cut back from large over the top events. 2019 will be our last year of chaotic and unpredictable events with too many Indians and not enough Chiefs on location. 

My reasons for declining future “large budget events” is based entirely on years of one surprise after another and clients opting not to hire enough security with open bars on site. From arrests to injuries on location, I have far more fun as does my Team with smaller parties of 200 or less guests.I’ve been asked about groom tossing. This tradition is fun but can also be dangerous. How so? The groom in California became entangled in the lights. He could also have fallen. Because of the liability associated with groom tossing, we ask about traditional aspects when planning your wedding or Vow Renewal to ensure that there aren’t accidents or injuries on location. We want your event seamless and worry free. 

I’m going to once again “go over” guests jumping in front of my photographers to get their own photos on location. For years now, my photographers have complained about trying to angle around guests who jump up to take their own photos. PLEASE REFRAIN from doing this. You are killing the shot for a photographer who has been hired to capture the shot. It’s often impossible to crop guests out of photos they’ve literally jumped into. 

A few weeks ago, this “guest with a phone or camera” scenario jumping into the shot ruined several photos. We have one shot at a photo on location. It’s a moment that cannot be duplicated. 

Please do not jump in front of photographers. If you’d like to take your own photo, give our photographers time to get the shot and THEN take your own photo. This isn’t a competition. It’s a Life Event. 

If you are in a photo taking a photo, it’s not only difficult and occasionally impossible to crop you but also time consuming adding more stress to my photographers during the editing process. Give the couple the opportunity to have beautiful photos of THEIR EVENT. The continued issues of people jumping into a shot roll on but, courtesy would mandate that if you see a photographer trying to capture a photo that you step out of the shot or… put your phone down and strike a pose instead. 

I’m at Ferguson, Ellis, Michael, Coffield & Green Bay Units in the coming weeks and as excited as you are that your wedding day has finally come to fruition. Please remember to err on the side of caution regarding your attire at your prison wedding.

For my California prison clients, the dress code is far more stringent. Be aware of this. If you need me to send you the dress code, I’m happy to do so. No one wants to wear a cafeteria smock. 

For my Arkansas prison clients, the wait is nearly over and we look forward to meeting you very soon at your wedding.

The continued questions regarding guests at weddings because you’ve seen guests in Louisiana at Prisons question keeps coming up. Louisiana allows guests. Texas in nearly ALL cases does not. The ONLY Unit in Texas that has allowed guests present is Sanders Estes Venus, Texas. Requests for guests must be submitted to the Warden by the inmate. BUT, I’ve never had ANY Unit other than Estes Approve a guest of guests at a prison wedding. We cannot bring rings to your prison wedding. Section K of the Administrative Directive pertaining to Offender Property in Texas specifically forbids ring exchanges. I’m sorry but, we follow ALL rules at prison weddings. 

If you’d like to bring friends or family with you to your prison wedding, you can but THEY MUST WAIT in the parking lot. They are WELCOME to join you at your photo shoot with us and I encourage you to bring friends or family with you to incorporate your friends and family into your photos. The more the merrier.Cindy and I will pack my SUV with enough bouquets, tiaras, furs, fascinators, signs and props to accommodate up to 6 other people at your photo shoot. 

I created an inventory that “rolls with me” to your prison wedding. From pink multi to teal multi to red multi bouquets and bouteniers or even mink coats and clothing in your size, my inventory is always a hit with our clients. We think of everything so you don’t have to. If you can’t wear your wedding dress to your Unit wedding, bring it with you and change clothes for your bridal photos. 

If you’d like to change clothes a few times to have a wider variety of photo options, bring additional clothing changes with you as well. Your photo location can be at a courthouse, city street, field, farm, abandoned building or anywhere near the Unit. It CANNOT be on Unit property though. We MUST leave the Unit to find a location nearby. Try to wear something without patterns on the fabric to your photo shoot in order for us to capture a “clean shot.” 

Solid colors are perfect for your photo shoot. Large, bold or busy patterns can be distracting. We have a wide array of tiaras and furs as well as scarves and shawls to add to your attire on photo shoot location events. 

It’s not unusual for our clients to bring their mother, grandmother, children and grandchildren to their photo shoot and we encourage making your photo shoot a family affair and opportunity to capture family photos together sharing your wedding day. 

From best friends to grandmothers and even pets, your photo shoot should incorporate what’s important to you. If there is someone special in your life sharing your journey from the outside, invite them along. We won’t be in the Unit for more than an hour in most cases. 

 Jozette brought her amazing grandmother to Torres Unit in Hondo, Texas. I packed an assortment of evening jackets as well as furs, bouquets and tiaras to bring fun. 

These two ladies were amazing good sports at an abandoned hotel near the Unit that I saw driving to Torres. My Coffield Unit bride loved the building near Tennessee Colony I saw driving past on my way to meet her. If you have noticed a unique old building, storefront or interesting building, just let me know. We will follow you there. 

I’ve been asked about our fascinators. Cindy and I stopped selling them a few years ago. Why? Because our clients love them. We incorporated them into our photo booth props instead. Cindy makes the fascinators by hand. I create the floral designs.  

We add to our inventory year round to keep it fresh and fun. From tiaras to furs to even wedding dresses, having everything our clients need is essential to exceeding their expectations. 

Buildings with murals also make great backdrops for location photography. My Bridgeport bride loved the unique wall art I found on my last trip to Bridgeport Unit and we found a wide array of great photo ops using the landscape of Bridgeport. Just keep your eyes open driving to visit and look for “out of the ordinary” locations. 

The best location for photos in Abilene is Jacobs Dream at Abilene Christian University. It’s perfect. If you are marrying at Robertson Unit, be sure to go by the university and check it out. Cindy and I along with the Texas Twins Events Team look forward to meeting you, your friends, your family and your inmate at your prison wedding soon. 

In unique situations, I become the mother I have never had to clients that need a friend. Samantha is reconsidering her decision to marry. It’s an important decision. Choose carefully. Life partners are worth waiting for. You can’t find the right one if you are “saddled up” with the wrong one… 

“UNLESS you have MADE the JOURNEY, never ATTEMPT to OFFER others, DIRECTIONS for their TRIP”

While going over event details with a client from my home office last night, my husband overheard me suggest hiring an outside bartender and security for an upcoming prom themed birthday party for 110-120 guests in November. My husband was getting a martini at the bar in my office. Occasionally when dealing with other vendors, I need a drink myself which is why I chose one of our three dens with an adjoining bar as my home office. True story. 

Many vendors will chase a dollar to make a dime. They lose businesses everyday over their inability to retain and keep clients. But, I don’t have the time to buy a venue and am therefore cautious with clients needing one. I ask the questions because I need the answers. My role as a planner is to make Events as affordable as possible. Budgeting is key. There are no friends in the events industry that can gain my client based on our relationship of friendship. Here’s how they can though- by offering the best value for my client. Sounds simple but, believe me it isn’t. Brand loyalty is built. 

Years ago, my husband bought not one but two Cadillac’s from me before getting the courage to ask me out to dinner. I also had advised him of ways to cut the costs of buying a luxury vehicle. I’m honest. My clients wouldn’t buy from anyone else at Cadillac, GMC or Hummer. Why? I earned their trust and whenever possible I also found and made the best car deal for them. 

My husband and I met while I was going through a divorce. It was a war. My ex had taken the car I believed he had bought in my name back and effectively left me without a vehicle. I had a son to get to school. I had to get to work. I also had to pay my lecherous attorneys. The solution? Visiting the dealership that serviced my vehicle. You know the one that I thought I owned and didn’t. I pitched myself as a salesperson. I also obtained a position within an industry that I had never worked in before. I had sold furs, jewelry, filmed commercials with Mel Tillis and worked as a high end print and commercial model for over twenty years at the time I married. 

But, I needed a car. Luxury car dealerships provided demos. I needed one. I also needed insurance and an income. Cadillac gave me all three. Building a client base required thinking outside the box. The old dogs on the sales floor had established clients. I needed my own. To overcome this obstacle, I hired my former photographer and ran my own print ads. Not just anywhere though. I ran these ads in area country clubs. Targeting consumers who could afford luxury cars. 

The same people at country clubs just like my rich and soon to be ex husband who played golf at, had drinks in the Men’s Only club at and dined at while I was effectively chasing a dime to make a dollar. 

The first ad at Ridglea Country Club shocked him. “Working as a car salesmen? What are my friends going to think? Come home and stop this. We can work it out. I will give you your Deville back. I don’t like everyone at the club seeing my wife in an evening dress pitching cars!” Hmm, I didn’t care. After all, my ex took the car he claimed to have bought me in my name back leaving me afoot with a son. He did this to force me into crawling back. Instead, I crawled away. 

That first ad sold 11 Cadillac’s, 2 Hummers and 3 GMC SUVs. I was smiling all the way to the bank. My ads brought clients in. My honesty sold them. My reputation earned me award after award. I was sought after. When people walked into the dealership holding a flyer from Ridglea, Colonial, Shady Oaks or Rivercrest Country Club they weren’t looking for my competitors on the sales floor, they were looking for me. If they didn’t have an appointment, they waited on me to be available too. 

I had also done something in the car industry no one had ever done before and I could support myself in style because of it. I didn’t need my Deville back. I needed an income, a vehicle, insurance and independence. Cadillac and my ability to think outside the box gave me all of the things I needed. My history surprises people. I’ve never been lucky. I’ve always been resilient. Did I expect to find a husband at Cadillac? No. I wasn’t looking. It was the first time in my entire life that I wasn’t worried about my future. I didn’t date. I wore my wedding ring to work and even had a photo of my ex in my office. I was all business all the time. 

My current husband had bought an SRX from me a year before walking into the dealership to tell me he hated it. I had another client in my office and asked him to wait in the lobby. I was concerned about him being upside down in the SRX and trying to find a way to save him money while closing a sale on an XLR. My solution? A demo. They are thousands less than new cars and carry a warranty. 

I brought him in and explained why I thought it was in his best interest to flip out of the SRX and into the Cadillac Escalade demo that I had been driving. “I’m not concerned about the cost. The SRX reminds me of my ex wife. Your husband must adore you and be so proud of you. I saw your billboard on the highway. You’re smart, successful, honest and upfront. He is a lucky man.” 

Snap. My faux personal life of being happily married was crushed and exposed. I started crying in my office on the salesfloor in front of all the salesmen. Damnit. My acting skills and my life were off fleek. Caught with my guard down. I had successfully created a faux personal life away from work that was so believable that I nearly believed it myself after years of faking it through my divorce. I’m a helluva actress but, Matthew broke my charade. 

I looked up and explained. “I’m not married. I’m divorced. I pretend to be married because I’m here to sell cars not find a date. It’s easier to pretend to be married.” This was how I met my husband. Shocking but true. I retired from Cadillac a year later. I didn’t need Cadillac anymore and started my own business instead. 

My new husband wanted me off the sales floor 50-60 hours a week and enjoying life with him, my son, my twin sister and new twin grandnieces. 

A few folks in the DFW area may remember my twin ad for Escalade “Got a big family? Get an Escalade.” Yes, even my family members were in my print ads. THAT ad sold the heck out of Escalades for me. Two sets of twins is a big family. My son and his equipment for sports was also used in another ad showing how much room for friends, kids and equipment the SRX had while being a crossover vehicle. 

My entire family became “models” during my years at Cadillac but, the twin ads and ads featuring me were my best car selling advertising. 

No one had ever been as creative at marketing as I was. But, poverty can define you or empower you. It empowered me. I was a survivor. I walked away from two marriages in twenty years with no money. I walked away with no vehicle both times. I would never do it again. All of my vehicles are paid for in cash and in my name. Although I can trust my current husband, I’ve learned to be independent and will never be dependent on anyone again as long as I live. My husband knows where I’ve been and understands that I refuse to be controlled. In fact, my agreement to marry years ago included a few rules. What were they? 1. I would own my own vehicle outright. 2. I would keep my own checking account and credit cards. 3. I would leave if infidelity ever occurred. 4. I would leave if violence ever entered our marriage. I wasn’t going back to where I had been and was very clear about the terms of committing myself to another husband. 

I don’t think like other people because I’ve also been a buyer. What would sell me? What would create brand loyalty? I’ve been a brand spokesperson for twenty years. I’ve pitched furs, jewelry, couture clothing and even Whatsburger. Building value in the product is essential to building a brand though and it’s difficult to create a great salesperson. Exceptional salespeople are born to sell. Although I’ve been in sales my entire life, I’ve never oversold a client. I’ve always tried to save money or offer discounts whenever possible because I’ve been on the other side as a buyer myself. What makes your product valuable? What makes buyers inclined to buy from you? Honor, integrity and treating my clients like family is why and how I outsold my coworkers in ANY industry I have ever worked in. They treated clients like numbers. I treated clients like family. I’m different. I care. If you’ve ever bought from me, you realize this. Previous clients buy and book with me over and over again. They also refer their friends and family to me. I’ve never advertised after leaving Cadillac and starting my own business. I’ve never had to. 

Kelley (a venue owner) had sent me a DM regarding renting her venue. The catch? Kelley REQUIRED using her own bartender and security. This would significantly “up the cost” to my client. Why? Because I have friends that work as bar tenders as well as retired military and police officers that work as security. Negotiating the additional cost to use Kelley’s security and bartender might or might not be a deal breaker but, due to the distance from the city to her venue, she would certainly need to be open to negotiating her “in season” fee. 

A lot of people fail to realize that there is an “off season” in the Events business but there is. Half of the year leaves venues like an abandoned motel, deserted and lonely. An experienced planner uses this knowledge to her clients benefit and, I often do. August is often too hot for anyone to book a venue with an outdoor area. October and November can be “iffy” too vecause Texas weather is unpredictable. 

Kelley was attempting to pad the bill by adding requirements to rent the venue. I knew it and she knew it too. Chasing a dime to make a dollar. This up charging was why I continued to get other bids from other venues. Kelley’s venue is remote. At least thirty minutes from Fort Worth and an hour from Dallas. 

If you have a venue in the country, lower your prices. Convenience is worth the upcharge to my clients and their guests. Seriously. I know a Burleson venue owner as well as an Azle venue owner that constantly call me to send them business. If your venue business is in the boonies though, attempting to charge the same rental rates as city venues is why you aren’t booking events. 

The client I’m planning the October/November event for has a son in the military. He’s coming home from Germany in late October to early November. She wants to celebrate his birthday and since he missed the prom years ago, incorporate the theme. She also wants a bar with beer and wine. She knows a friend with a barbecue restaurant that can handle catering. We need a building. Decorations. Bartender and security. Photography. DJ. We also have a budget and I always stay within my clients budgets. I will locate a building for her and it will be a building that is within her budget. 

Today after Estes Unit, I’m going to 3 venues. I’m also using this “venue hopping” to price out an anniversary party for August 31st for 70 guests with no bar and a budget remarkably close to the prom themed event. Meaning, the Vow Renewal with far fewer guests and no alcohol will be far easier to come in under budget on. An open bar can easily add $2k and up to the overall budget. Catering can run $12-25 per person and the Vow Renewal client is by far well within the budget he’s given. It’s going to be a stretch with the Prom Themed Birthday Party with an Open Bar and up to 120 guests. A tight stretch. A make every penny count stretch. If the client can secure catering outside of the budget she’s given me, it will be far easier to pull this off but, if she can’t, Wendy and Cindy will be shopping venues first and shopping everything else second since the largest expense is the venue rental. 

Both clients need a venue first. The venue being the most expensive investment. One of these days when I have time, Cindy and I will buy our own venue to alleviate the need to find one for clients but it won’t be this year. We are overwhelmed. 

A few years ago, Kelley called me to send her clients. I thought this was funny. Why? Because Kelley has never referred our services that’s why. It’s always ironic to me that folks who never throw you a bone want you to throw them a steak. 

Luckily though, I don’t need referrals from venue owners. I’m on staff at Belltower Chapel and have been for years. I limit my affiliation with other venues. Why? Because Belltower supports ACH and foster children. I donate 70% of my fee to ACH. 

Other venues outside of Belltower are all about the money. That’s okay. It’s business. 

But- my clients ARE MY BUSINESS and therefore, building value for their buck is why I don’t pitch them a venue just because I know the owner. Instead, I shop them. 

My clients warrant value. I don’t have any “friends” owning a venue who can supersede my clients. I don’t want any friends expecting me to pad their pockets at my clients expense either. 

Last year, another venue owner called me. “We are going to go out of business. We doubled our prices and can’t get any bookings.” I sat my coffee down to rerun what I just heard. 

If common sense was spare change, a few folks couldn’t afford a coffee. “Perhaps you should lower your prices. If a product doesn’t sell, you discount it.” The venue owner wasn’t interested in solving her own problems. “Amazingly, you have never advertised and have grown year after year. Send me your clients. We will even take on LBGT couples. We need what you have.” What the? “Take on LBGT clients?” I was offended. 

My affiliation within the LBGT community was EARNED. Also, I don’t pass around my clients like peanuts at a bar. Humph. How to be politically correct in an obviously incorrect conversation? I went to my office bar and poured myself a chocolate martini. 

This was going to be a LENGTHY CONVERSATION. “Our clients are loyal to us because we are loyal to them. Inflating your costs is why you are losing clients. This should be common sense. You cannot squeeze everything WITHIN THEIR BUDGETS OUT of them. Venue rentals are a buyers market. As a seller, you need to be affordable and when building your brand, you need to be open to other events and clients outside of solely weddings. Weddings have a season. Off season though, you can promote corporate events, family reunions, birthday parties, Christmas parties and other bookings to sustain you through the off season.” 

Of course, this “intelligent and knowledgeable advice” fell on deaf ears. As a businessperson, if you are a business owner, wake up. I can’t wake you up. I can however shop your venue in my clients best interests and budget. “Don’t ask me for an apple and expect me to bake you a pie.” 

Other vendors ARE NOT MY CLIENTS OR MY PROBLEM. MY CLIENTS ARE MY PRIORITY. If you haven’t figured this out yet, I can’t help you. Loyalty is always directed at my clients not people AKA vendors who are crazily expecting me to BUILD THEIR BUSINESS. 

This morning while organizing my floral arrangements for Michael and Coffield Units Tuesday, I took a call for Salano State Prison in California. 

Our existing bookings in California are stacked meaning finding time to travel to a Unit 6 hours from LA, San Diego, Santa Barbara or even Lompoc (all cities Cindy and I will be at during our trip to meet clients, film commitments and family) is tricky. I ran the distance several times from several cities. 

This Unit is at least five hours from any city that Cindy and I will be at in August. Normally, this could be factored in to an off day during our travels but we have two destination event bookings as well as a family reunion and meeting our sister at Magic Mountain on one day as well as filming a sizzle reel on another in LA. I.E. this is another jam packed trip for the Texas Twins. If I can get to the Unit and find time though, I will. 

Leigh Ann is taking over California Prison Weddings however, she will be based in San Diego August and September while her husband, Alex is in training at the Naval Base before moving to base housing at Point Mugu. 

California like Texas is a big state. Because of this, my stepsister, Tammy is also going to be handling Prison Weddings. 

Due to Cindy and my schedule while in California on this trip, trying to judge distance from cities on our itinerary to the location of the prison may or may not work out for me to personally officiate your Prison Wedding. However, if I can’t, Leigh Ann or Tammy can. I’m moving my bookings to predominantly Texas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Louisiana and Missouri as the majority of my bookings are in Texas. 

Because of the burgeoning schedules of Cindy and I, my son and his wife are also coming on board to address Oklahoma and Arkansas bookings as well as county jail requests in Texas. 

I’m going to go over stacking because it’s essential if you are stacked at a Unit that you are on time. Tuesday, I have two clients at Michael and two at Coffield. These two Units are within 7-9 minutes of one another. Because of this, I frequently move from Michael to Coffield or Coffield to Michael. 

However, if you are running late on wedding day, other clients at the same Unit or the Unit I’m moving to are going to be inconvenienced due to your tardiness. Please be considerate of other clients and arrive at least 15 minutes prior to your scheduled wedding time.

UPDATE ON MICHAEL UNIT CLOTHING- Dresses are now allowed but you cannot wear solid white. Why? Inmates wear white. Please incorporate color or patterns to white. Please keep hemlines not shorter than 2 inches above the knee. Please wear a cami of your dress reveals any cleavage. Please wear a slip if your clothing is sheer.

I’m off to shop venues, meet clients and looking forward to meeting all of our new clients soon at your Prison Weddings and especially excited to see our former clients at your Vow Renewal Ceremonies with Cindy and our Team in the coming months.

As always, we appreciate your trust and your loyalty. We are thankful for the opportunity to meet amazing people from all walks of life and to have the ability to finally spend time together that my career in sales as well as Cindy’s career took from us both for over twenty years. Texas Twins Events gave us the opportunity to give the gift of Dream Events one family at a time while subsequently giving us time to spend with each other. 

For all of the clients that the twins or Maddy jumping into your photos laughed with us, God Bless You. Our grandkids always thought a camera was meant for them. Maddy still does. 

When I look back over the hundreds of families and good times we’ve shared with ya all over the years on location for your bridal photos with my grandnieces hugging your leg or holding your bouquet, I’m reminded what amazing people you are. The love and kindness you’ve brought to Cindy and I as well as our children and grandchildren is a gift. Creating Texas Twins Events was a partnership. Cindy and I knew affordable options didn’t exist. Cindy was also taking on the responsibility of raising her twin grand daughters. Cindy had given up her income as a salesperson to raise her grandchildren. My twin sister is selfless. She is hilarious and she’s never met a stranger. She is also my best friend. Texas Twins Events gave us the opportunity to load up our kids and grandkids and go off to meet wonderful people who wanted a Dream Event. Amazing people who welcomed not only my Team but our entire family. People who became far more than clients. People who became the fabric of our lives. We love ya all… 

TDCJ Weddings- Work, Travel, Clients, Kids & Chaos…

Yesterday while in Palo Pinto County, a comment was posted on one of my Instagram posts. What was it about? The post and photo were updates regarding our upcoming wedding ceremonies at the LA County Jail and California Prisons this August.

Who was this hater? Someone with 2 followers (go figure) and a private account (as usual) who was attempting to redirect traffic to themselves. My first thought? “Get off my timeline!” 

This private account also featured a stock photo (how original) while spewing their arrogance while assuming that his or her (who knows since they didn’t even use their own photo in their previous file) opinions regarding inmate marriage mattered to me OR my clients. They didn’t. 

My clients, my family and I are ALL very happy. Look at the photos kids. My clients AND my family are having non stop fun. We love what we do and who we do it for. We are also having a great time enjoying our new friends while celebrating love, resilience and joy on wedding day. 

Haters are going to hate. In fact, narrow minded idiots unhappy with their own lives will almost always find a way to voice their opinions on others. 

Truthfully though, others don’t care about your opinions. “Prisoners shouldn’t be allowed to marry” among other things in the comment by the person who not only wouldn’t use their real name or photo included the suggestion that “I should get my $hit together and get a life?” Let’s examine this stupid statement and go over the cowardly idiot who posted it ONLY to remove it AFTER reading this blog. 

That’s right, I saw you closed your account after deleting your comment you screwball. First off, inmates like anyone else have the right to marry. Get over yourself. Secondly, I have a very busy life that revolves around my clients and my family as well as my volunteer efforts. You see, unlike you “troller behind a stock photo with a private account,” I give back to my community. 

I also strongly and wholly support the belief that Love Is Love. Get off your computer or phone and stop hiding behind that mask you wear and you might not be so hateful. Get some sun. Get out more often. Get a life. Don’t tell people WITH a life to get one. Get your OWN. Stop spying on everyone else’s attempting to put your negativity on them. You ARE not that important I can assure you. 

At the time this notification came through, I was planning to leave my client in Palo Pinto County and go to lunch with Cindy, Makenna, Stephaney and my son in Weatherford. 

Reading the comment, I had stopped to consider whether or not to be infuriated by a stranger who knew their idiot comment WOULD upset me and finally decided that they weren’t worth it.

Sitting in the county jail parking lot, I also reconsider deleting the comment or responding? This “scenario” has happened a handful of times on Instagram the past few years to my account on instagram. Twitter too although most bullies use email or the phone to give me their opinions. 

The illogical nature of numskulls “reaching out to a stranger” while even thinking or believing that anyone else and especially me cares about “their opinion” continues to confuse me. 

Some folks will do anything to get the attention they can’t based on their own lives. The internet is full of them. Stalkers, trollers, mean spirited and ugly hearted people who would never consider walking up to me to say the things they feel safe saying on the internet. 

News flash for the haters, no one cares what you think. Your opinion to myself or my clients means nothing to us. You are a fly in the soup. A rude diner. You are living a miserable life and want to bring everyone else down with you BUT you can’t. Do you know why? Because you aren’t THAT important. You WISH you were but you aren’t. Bullies never are important. Grow up. I’m sure you’ve heard this before but take heed, trying to run a stranger down might upset your other unknowing victims who don’t check notifications but… I’m not your victim or anyone else’s phony account loudmouth. 

Why would ANYONE out there who isn’t a client or even a family member THINK that THEIR opinion or THEIR beliefs matter to me I have no idea but, these haters have far too much time on their hands. Go volunteer. Adopt a pet. Find something more constructive to occupy your time Pal. Also, unless you are bound to me by blood or business, bug off. 

How do these haters even find my accounts? They search hashtags pertaining to inmate marriage. I.E. they are looking for something to complain about and more importantly someone to target. 

Trolls. People so miserable in their own lives that they want to find someone happy and attempt to ruin their day too. Big surprise trollers, you didn’t ruin mine. I met wonderful clients all week long and even had a great day with family and clients yesterday instead. 

Your opinion is the wind to me. Whispers of animosity spoken by those who have no voice in my life, my businesses or my direction. 

Let’s review something I hear regularly by others who (ironically) “had Religious issues” with my client bases years ago, you know who you are. You troll ALL of my social media. You subscribe to all of my blogs and you can’t believe I’m successful. “NOW you reach out to me to teach you how to do what I do?” You have got to be kidding me. Why would I create competition that doesn’t exist and why would people intent on seeing me fail who instead watched me succeed have the audacity to even ask? Trollers. God love em because no one else does. 

Since our inmate wedding business now spans several states. I’m going to address Arkansas and Oklahoma bookings first. There is a process and the process is lengthy. While Texas clients generally wait 1-2 months for wedding day, Arkansas and Oklahoma as well as New Hampshire and a handful of other states wait 6 months to a year to marry. Shocking isn’t it? But, each state is different and each state follows its own set of rules. The process to marry an inmate is lengthy and complicated. Hire someone who knows how to walk you through it. I cannot stress this enough. 

Over the past year I’ve had three clients call me regarding their visitation being revoked. This too is a process to overcome. There are guidelines and procedures censured in place that MUST be followed. You cannot marry an inmate if you cannot visit them. Contact me, we will work through it and get your appeal filed. Everything regarding marrying an inmate is a process. It’s not a process we can control. It is a process we will follow.

Since Cindy and I are traveling to California several times the next few months as well as California, Louisiana, Arkansas and Oklahoma, it should be noted that traveling with teenage twins isn’t for the faint hearted. Do you leave them home with other adults and wait on phone calls regarding chaos at home or take them with you and listen to them tell you they are  bored? 

I’m on the fence about California as it’s a working trip. Other states are generally day trips. Having Maryssa and Makenna out of school for the summer and trying to be entertaining while working requires the skills of a magician. 

Children are cute and hilarious until they become teens. If you are unaware of this, as a parent, you will find out soon enough. “I don’t want to eat there. I don’t like this hotel. I don’t want to sit by her. She’s using the charger and I need it.” 

I could go on and on here but, for our parents spending the summer with their teen children, I realize that I don’t need to. You get it. 

Cindy and I have raised two generations of children. The twins are 14 going on 40 and the youngest, Madyson keeps us laughing with her personality and energy. Maddy’s mom has no idea of how hard her move will be when she leaves her village of babysitters behind to move to California. Maddy has had Cindy and Wendy as well as Maryssa and Makenna to help take care of her. Maddy has had a village. I worry about it.

I’m on site at several venues this weekend and looking forward to meeting new clients at your prison or county jail wedding soon.

For all of our clients working through the summer and trying to be entertaining to their teen children, hang in there, we’ve got a few months of summer left. Ya all can do this… 

TDCJ Weddings & Adventures With Wendy Wortham- Green Bay To Hughes To Hutchins Unit…

I have several clients waiting on I60’s and although the waiting is the hardest part, when the Chaplain calls to schedule your wedding, please answer unknown calls as it may very well be the Unit calling. Last week, I declined an unknown call myself. Thankfully, the Beto Chaplain left a message to return his call. 

Wednesday morning as I loaded up my SUV to meet two clients on my way to Hughes Unit, Cindy and I were still laughing about the two headed fur we took in trade from Huntsville and what we were going to do with it. “Maddy thinks it’s a stuffed animal and the twins are horrified.” 

If you missed our Huntsville adventure, here’s the blog link– The Pawning Planners On Location. More Flips, Swaps & Barters.

I haven’t had time to shock my furniture reupholstering connection yet with this “latest flip.” Terry will either tell me to trash it or tailor it to remove both heads and the legs. It will be a “wait and see” situation.

Occasionally our Flips ARE Flops instead but, since we don’t limit creative requests, we certainly do have a few hilarious adventures on site at Appraisal Appointments. 

Cindy was covering Jack County Jail clients as well as Parker County and my son was at Green Bay Unit with clients while my niece, Leigh Ann was finishing editing on photos from Tarrant County Jail bride, Payton. I would be “flying solo down the back roads” with Skynard, Donna Summers, ELO, Elton John and the Bee Gee’s keeping my company today. 

Checking in with Cheyenne, I let her know that I was taking the back roads in order to meet two clients on my way to Hughes Unit who wanted help buying their marriage licenses. I map out my travels to accommodate such requests on a regular basis. 

Country towns have creative signage. One air conditioning sign had me laughing out loud remembering my twin sisters firm belief that “hillbillies are geniuses.” The sign? “Do you have a HOT WIFE? Service your A/C and cool her off.” I bet that guy was even funnier in person. 

Passing by the Dairy Queen sign, I thought about my brother in law, Steve Daniel who has fond memories of riding his bike to DQ and fishing on the river in San Antonio. I loved the “howdy ya all” sign. Welcome to the friendly and fun back roads of Texas! The courthouse I was meeting my first client at looked like a Gothic mansion with the overcast sky behind it. 

Settled in a small town with many of the stores closed down, sadly the expensive building was surrounded by smaller shops that had most likely (years ago) had been thriving with customers. The irony wasn’t lost on me. This courthouse ruled the center of Meridian, Texas. After helping my client get her license, I jumped back in to my SUV to head to Coryell County Courthouse and sent Cindy a text from my navigation. 

My Crain Unit client has been having difficulty buying his license and after numerous phone calls back and forth, I had scheduled him into my day to address his apprehension by accompanying him to buy the license. I actually do this for clients frequently by “working them into my road trips to prisons.” 

My timeline to meet my Crain Unit client was perfect since the courthouse was fairly close to Hughes Unit and mapping out meetings is essential to accommodating my schedule and my clients. 

Driving down 6, I sent Cindy a pic of a “report poaching sign.” I’d never seen one before. 

Cindy called me and asked “was that a poaching sign posted? I haven’t seen one of those in years.” I send road trip text photos all of the time if Cindy isn’t with me laughing about the things we see rolling down the road. 

My sister can name every type of cow and admire a ranch fence like nobody else I know. Why? Because while I was traveling the world modeling, Cindy was building a dairy brick by brick in Gordon, Texas. 

Cindy is far more “country” than I will ever be. We are Compensating Personality Twins as are Cindy’s twin granddaughters. It’s rare. Cindy loves “educating me” about goats, horses and cattle on our back roads journeys across Texas and Louisiana as well as Oklahoma. I think all cows look alike. But, Cindy loves to tell me what makes them different. 

I always gas up because finding gas stations can be tricky on back roads. 

By the time, I rolled into Coryell County, Christina had sent me a text regarding running a little behind which perfectly fit my schedule to meet my Crain Unit client before heading to Hughes. 

Arriving at Hughes, I let Christina know where I would be in the parking lot while fielding texts and phone calls from other prison wedding clients. My phone never stops ringing. I dabbed on light makeup as the guard tower watched me change shoes, fix my hair and finally leave my SUV to walk to the main entrance. Lipstick and tinted glasses when leaving WorthamWorld early along with a ponytail are my usual attire. Flip flops are changed into dress shoes once I arrive at a Unit. I always wear a suit to Prisons. 

Sadly, the status of the inmate hadn’t been changed from G4 to G2 which meant he would be behind glass. This upset my client but, it’s my job to calm my clients and I did. Had we known ahead of time the status change would be delayed, we could have rescheduled the wedding but, these things can and do happen. 

No one likes marrying with glass separating them. Christina didn’t either but, we overcame the disappointment of having her fiancée behind the glass and enjoyed a wonderful visit prior to the ceremony. Since Christina didn’t want photos posted, I posed with her husband and bought photos of all three of us as well as one of her and her husband before leaving the Unit for her to keep. 

Headed to Huntsville again, I thought of all the times I’ve driven to Gatesville the past two years. A city that two years ago, I had never heard of that literally is compromised of mostly inmates and prisons. 

It’s shocking how frequently I drive to Gatesville. Many of the Units house females although Hughes Unit is a male Unit surrounded by female Units. Other than Hughes Unit, the majority of my Gatesville clients are males marrying females.San Saba Unit is also a female Unit I frequently make trips to as is Hobby. 

The Hobby Unit clients booking with us are predominantly females marrying females. Since I’m always asked about this, yes, it’s legal for a male to marry a male or a female to marry a female. This question continues to confuse me. The Units I marry inmates in are located in the United States. 

I have no idea why this question comes up pertaining to inmate marriage since same sex marriage has been legal for years now in the United States. 

Tennessee Colony is also one of those towns and a regular trip for my niece, Leigh Ann or I to meet a client at their Prison Wedding. 

Beto, Michael, Coffield and Gurney are regular trips month after month. Tennessee Colony like Gatesville and Huntsville is a “city of prisons.”

I had a surprising text out of the blue from one of my former production company friends asking “are you and Cindy under contract?” I advised Kristen “no, we are too busy for film projects and we’ve expanded inmate weddings to cover several states. 

My niece, Leigh Ann and my stepsister, Tammy are going to be taking on California Prison Weddings by August 2019 with my son and his wife focusing on Oklahoma, Louisiana and Arkansas. 

Due to my schedule with traditional as well as prison clients and Pawning Planners Clients, Cindy and I will continue to travel while focusing more on Texas and Louisiana when not traveling for destination bookings through Texas Twins Events.” 

The truth is that although I’m consistently contacted regarding show concepts and inquiries, our clients will always be our priority. Cindy and I put everything we have into taking care of our clients. 

If and when we have the time to take on the task of filming, it won’t be during wedding season. The reason for this is our time. 

Prison weddings and traditional bookings during wedding season leave Cindy and I no time for Skype, voice overs, sizzle reels, conference calls and other time consuming tasks that production companies require. Flying off to pitch meetings in season is out the question for the Texas Twins. 

Arriving back at my home office and preparing my suit for Hutchins Unit, I check in with my niece, Leigh Ann who will be handling photography Thursday for Brandy after her inmate wedding at Hutchins while juggling phone calls, emails and text messages. 

In this type of business, responding quickly and promptly is essential. I respond every 2-3 hours to clients and keep them updated. Clients are anxious. The process to marry an inmate can run from 3-6 weeks or in unusual situations like Torres Unit, over a year. Inmates being moved are generally the reason. 

Bouncing from an appointment with my grandniece, Makenna at Cooks Childrens Hospital for her dermatology appointment and meeting Cindy to take Makenna back to school before parking Leigh Ann’s SUV for her to jump into mine and head to Hutchins Unit. We all have suvs to carry numerous props for photo shoots except my son who drives a 4X4 truck. All of our vehicles are black which makes it easier for clients to find us in jail or prison parking lots. 

My twin grandnieces, Maryssa and Makenna like Cindy and I have completely different health issues. Maryssa unlike Makenna had Precocious Puberty. Makenna unlike Maryssa has eczema and psoriasis. Completely different health issues is unusual for identical twins but, Cindy has had none of my health issues and I’ve had none of hers. 

Makenna is trying a new steroid cream for her outbreaks and we’ve added bleach baths to the mix after her dermatologist suggested it to Cindy and I at her latest appointment.My youngest grandniece, Madyson is a ball of fire and not a twin. Maddy is three and a half but her first two years were spent with hearing issues we were unaware of. 

Maddy has been in speech therapy after ear surgery last year and is now making great strides with verbal communication. Maddy also has wildly curly and unnameable hair. 

My niece, Leigh Ann is the only person in our entire family with curly hair that she regularly flat irons. As a child, Leigh Ann was nicknamed, Shirley Temple due to her reddish curly hair. Maddy looks just like Leigh Ann did years ago. 

Leigh Ann started photography shortly after the birth of Maddy and has worked with me for years. You can trust my niece to make your day as special as you are. 

Like my entire family, Leigh Ann treats each and every client like her only client. From officiating traditional events and ceremonies to inmate weddings and photography, Leigh Ann loves working with our diverse client bases. Maddy also often “jumps in” on photo shoots with clients. 

Did I anticipate our services as inmate wedding Officiants to expand and compromise the largest portion of our bookings? No. Who would? But, this diverse client base has become my favorite type of client. Why? Because unlike our other clients, the clients marrying inmates are far more passionate and thankful for our help making their Dream Event a reality that’s why. 

The interest by media and production companies regarding our prison wedding clients continues to surprise me but, none of my clients are familiar with television and I’m very protective of their journey. 

Standard reality contracts would take advantage of our clients who are often unaware of what the “talent” would actually be giving up if they werent educated by us about reality television and more importantly, standard reality contracts with production companies. 

Thankfully though, Cindy and I are “very familiar with standard reality contracts” and more than happy to educate our clients regarding the pros and cons of reality tv. Our clients are our priority. Thirty percent of them don’t want others to know they are marrying an inmate. In fact, we don’t publish photos in order to protect their privacy as a courtesy.

I’m a multitask expert at all times but taking on filming is simply too much “in season” for me. Cindy and I haven’t had a day off in months. 

Driving in to the guard gate at Hutchins Unit, my Hughes Unit bride called me to check on the status of her marriage license being recorded. I had sent it to San Antonio via 2 day priority mail on my way home from Hughes Unit and quickly tracked the envelope sitting in the parking lot and let her know it would arrive Friday at the clerks office today before 3PM. She was relieved that I sent it with tracking but, I send every marriage license with tracking unless I’m filing it in person. I’m OCD. 

Parking my SUV, I sent a text to Brandy from the Hutchins parking lot to meet me at reception, I left Leigh Ann in my SUV. Brandy looked beautiful. 

Going in to reception, we encountered a secretary who “didn’t know anything about a wedding today. I don’t have an I60.”  Brandy was immediately upset. Who wouldn’t be. We had scheduled this wedding three weeks ago. Once again though, it’s my job to comfort my clients and stay in control. I had Brandy sit down and told the secretary to find the Chaplain. 

Apparently, both Chaplains have retired at Hutchins which was a bit of a problem and thankfully, the volunteer Chaplain, Mike knew what was going on and where the original I60 was. The volunteer, Mike sent a guard to the law library to find a copy of the original I60 to give to the wardens office. This took nearly an hour. 

When waiting on a prison wedding, the wait can be up in the air. From our escorts to locating the inmate to moving to the location, I can be in a Unit 1-2 hours. Rarely though, I’ve waited three hours. It happens. 

When my client and I were finally escorted to the visitation area, my client was thrilled to finally see her fiancée! Although getting to him was exasperating, the wait was worth the joy I witnessed between my couple. 

The stress and setbacks leading up to a prison wedding for clients is the hardest part of the process. Once the wedding is performed though, their relief is evident. Finally, they are married. FINALLY. 

As usual though, the Unit photos were blurry and dissapointing. I had purchased 3. We left one with the Groom and I gave 1 to the bride and kept the photo below. Thanks to Texas humidity, my hair is a hot mess. I had cut my own bangs in my SUV again. Ugh. Wish I had time for a process haircut but it won’t be “in season.” 

Walking out of the Unit, Brandy and I both were surprised at her grainy wedding photos BUT that’s why I pack an entire SUV full of bouquets, tiaras, clothing, furs and more. That’s right. Brandy was going to have a great day with Leigh Ann and I less than 3 miles from Hutchins.

I believe everyone should be able to celebrate their wedding day and my photo shoot and rolling photo booth ensure that they do. Cindy and I had found the blue fur at a junk shopping after leaving San Saba Unit. The fur was a perfect match to Brandy’s outfit. 

We think of everything. Photography by http://www.facebook.com/maddieandmephotography. 

The mahogany fur stole Cindy and I found junk shopping after leaving McConnell Unit a few weeks ago. We are always shopping for client photo shoot ideas, props and fun items. 

Leigh Ann can’t wait to finish editing Brandy’s photos and I can wait to see them. When her husband is released, Brandy is also rebooking us to perform their Vow Renewal. We are looking forward to another celebration of joy and freedom long after Lock Up…. 

TDCJ Officiant Wendy Wortham Work, Travel, Transportation, Tantrums & Tiaras…

I sleep very little during wedding season. For years, my Team and I “caught a break” off season to address refurbishing trades from Pawning Planners Clients sold at Texas Twins Treasures. Inmate wedding services changed our “off season.” How so? We no longer have an off season and are booked year round. Prison weddings took the place of “off season” for the Texas Twins.

A few folks (including my competitors) wonder how on earth my first Prison wedding literally shifted our client base 300 percent?  

The answer my friends is NOT BY ADVERTISING. The answer is by exceeding clients expectations, earning their trust and gaining their loyalty. 

A few of our competitors are jealous of our success but, “you can’t profit from the harvest if you don’t plant the crops.” 

In April 2017, Misty emailed me regarding performing a Prison wedding at Sanders Estes Unit. I underwent the process to become an Approved Officiant in order to help Misty. 

I have never marketed myself or paid for advertising in the event industry. I HAVE NEVER NEEDED TO ADVERTISE PRISON OFFICIANT SERVICES either. 

Due to this new expansion of our services at Texas Twins Events, I didn’t anticipate the surge in new bookings because at the time, I was unaware that the market and subsequent demand for inmate weddings even existed. 

But, A few months after Misty’s wedding at Estes Unit in April 2017, I was with another client at Michael Unit in September 2017. 

In October 5, 2017, I was with three clients at Estes Unit. By October 7, 2017, I was with another client at Ferguson Unit. 

By December 28, 2017, I was at Darrington with a client who had originally been at Jester Unit and hired Jo Anne (a competitor) to officiate her ceremony.  

This same client told me “Jo Anne can’t officiate so she told me her sister would but the Warden won’t allow her to. I need someone to marry me.” She hired Jo Anne but now Jo Anne was telling the client her sister would officiate? What was going on with my competitors?

The Jester inmate was subsequently transferred to Darrington. I drove to Darrington and married the client who wanted a reliable Officiant after being run around by my competitor. As usual, I exceeded her expectations and provided prison wedding Officiant services. 
My goal and the main reason for starting Texas Twins Events was to help people. By helping Misty with a creative request for services, over the first year of performing inmate services, bookings continued to roll in. I didn’t need to advertise Prison Weddings. I leveled the playing field in an industry that prior to me was charging exhorbitant fees to consumers simply because they wanted to marry an inmate. While my competition was being greedy, dishonest and misleading, I was being honest, affordable and most importantly, reliable. 

Prior to prison weddings, I had been in the event business many years prior to expanding my business to include prison weddings and had never advertised our services and more importantly, didn’t need to long before offering inmate Officiant services. 

Frankly, at the time Misty contacted me to marry her, I was juggling 50-75 existing through Texas Twins Events as well as being an Officiant on staff at Bell Tower Chapel and addressing clients Bartering through my sister business, The Pawning Planners. 

I was also a consultant for GLG and under contract with my twin sister with production companies and filming numerous projects at the same time within the same window. 

I.E. I was busy but, if people needed help marrying an inmate, I was willing to find time to help them. Since prison weddings are scheduled Monday through Friday leaving my weekends free for traditional and existing bookings, I easily could take on more inmate weddings and did. 

Prison weddings were a “perfect fit” to my existing schedule and more importantly, didn’t interfere with existing client bookings on evenings and weekends. 

Although I wasn’t “marketing inmate Officiant services,” word of mouth expanded my inmate Officiant business over and over from April 2017 to now. In fact, we now cover several states. 

Jo Anne (a competitor) had began trolling my sites since 2017 and following me. Although Jo Anne had been performing prison weddings for two years longer than I have and should have built her reputation, she had disappointed the previous clients who subsequently hired me instead. 

Over two years and running now, Jo Anne also recognized and realized that she was  losing her clients to me. I didn’t steal her clients. Her clients like everyone else found me. If you lose a client to a competitor, you lost them based on your own behavior. 

With the Darrington and Stiles clients, Jo Anne couldn’t perform their weddings due to being rescinded. I called her about “this issue” myself since her previous clients continued to find and more importantly, hire me. 

Throughout this two year window, more and more clients would book with me although again it should be noted that I never advertised to generate new clients. 

Clients found me because they had heard about me or because the other Officiant they had hired let them down. Unlike my competitors, I didn’t let anyone down. I treat each and every client like the star they are. 

One sunny afternoon while I was on site with a client at Belltower Chapel & Garden,  another call (and previous client of Jo Anne) came in regarding a wedding at Stiles Unit from yet another person who had hired Jo Anne and was unhappy. “She doesn’t answer her phone and when she does, I can’t get any information. “I hired her but I’ve heard about you. Will you help me?” 

Stiles Unit is an all day drive to and  from my location in Fort Worth. However, after speaking with this young lady, I committed to marrying her myself. 

I also advised this young lady to call the Courts in Huntsville to verify whether Jo Anne was approved. The new to me client called me back to tell me “Jo Anne wasn’t Approved.” 

Due to this shocking information regarding my competitor, I called Huntsville myself. My client was right. I quickly posted the contact information to the Courts in Huntsville on my FB business and personal sites in order to warn ANYONE planning to marry an inmate in Texas to verify Officiant credentials with the Courts PRIOR to retaining an Officiant. 

Immediately following my FB warning post, one of Jo Anne’s “clown posse” called the Courts in Huntsville to “file an erroneous and false complaint” against me regarding my simply stating the facts regarding  my warning to anyone considering hiring a TDCJ Officiant. 

Of course, a false and erroneous complaint from my competitor, Jo Anne and her posse regarding my honest statement had no impact whatsoever on my stellar reputation with the Courts in Huntsville. 

Heads up folks I’m nothing if not blatantly honest. I went into this business to help people. Jo Anne HAD BEEN IN THE PRISON WEDDING business for two years prior to me. Jo Anne has had every opportunity to be a success at this point. 

I wasn’t promoting myself or advertising to TDCJ bookings and I wouldn’t need to. Honesty and client satisfaction built my Prison wedding client base. 

Obviously, Jo Anne and her sidekicks false complaint regarding me warning consumers to call and verify credentials neither impacted or impeded my credentials in Huntsville. “We have other Officiants and I’m calling the Courts to file a complaint against your post regarding Jo Anne.” Sound familiar Jo Anne? 

You know, my post about people needing to know whoever they hired was QUALIFIED to perform the job they had been hired to do in the first place? If the truth bothered you, why didn’t you advise people retaining your services that you couldn’t perform their ceremony in the first place? If you hadn’t let your clients down and they hadn’t found me, I also wouldn’t have known there was an issue with your credentials either. Think about it. 

Our prison Officiant and planning business have literally boomed regardless of the sneaky tactics Jo Anne and her “clown posse” continue to pull. 

In February 2018, I was at Coffield Unit when a call came in from someone who needed an Officiant at Hodge Unit who had originally hired Jo Anne. These continued victims of my competitors continued to find me. I knew there was a problem because my new clients told me what they had been through dealing with my competition. Unlike my competitors though, I made their former clients day at a prison seemless, pleasant and memorable. 

In March 2018, I was at Hutchins Unit with another client when as usual my site was being consistently visited by Jo Anne. 

In March, I was also at Beto Unit when my website Team advised me that Splendora, Texas continued to hit my sites. I track every visitor to all of my sites. Jo Anne began paying for placement on google. 

Cindy and I flew to California to film This Time Next Year with Cat Deeley while also working destination events booked through Texas Twins Events. I.E. we were too busy to worry about Jo Anne. In fact, we always have been. 

We HAVE never been too busy to save clients who hired the wrong Officiant before coming to us. We MAKE time for people who need help. For Jo Anne’s former clients, we’ve made time again and again. 

In April 2018 I was back at Estes Unit before travelling to Stiles Unit on April 19, 2018 and marrying  the bride who needed my help AFTER hiring Jo Anne first.  

Since becoming a TDCJ Officiant April 2017, due to the number of clients coming to us for help, we have rebranded and expanded to address the growing need for inmate wedding services. I’ve been the second Officiant over and over because the first Officiants AKA my competitors have consistently let their former clients down. These “other Officiants” could have done the right thing and chose not to. They also lost their clients to me because they failed to provide services they had been paid to perform. 

A few days ago, Jo Anne drove traffic from her own page to my page by tagging me on FB.” While booking in these new clients, I asked “how did you hear about us? We have never advertised. So, can I ask who it was that referred you?” 

The shocking answer of my new clients and how they found me over the past few days was ironically not from previous client referrals but instead from my competitor? Jo Anne. 

While Jo Anne was busy talking about me on FB as well as tagging me, she was also inadvertently promoting me. Amazing isn’t it? 

New bookings that had never even heard of TDCJ Officiant, Texas Twins Events or Wendy Wortham until my competitors couldn’t stop talking about me? Finding me due to posts from my competition about me? Increased traffic that crashed my site due to my competitors? 

Ironically, because life is ironic, my site crash and subsequent “new Prison bookings” wouldn’t have happened this week without “help” from my competitor, Jo Anne. 

In March of 2018, I decided to buy a trademark for Texas Prison Weddings. By September 2018, I realized that I had hired the wrong attorney to do so. I was never interested in limiting myself to Texas in the first place. 

I decided to abandon my March 2018 trademark filing and focus on clients in several states instead. Texas Twins Events is national so why limit ourselves? 
Since all of our services including prison wedding services are available in several states, I knowingly and willingly abandoned the trademark for Texas Prison Weddings. My competitor subsequently picked it up. 

The trademark was approved for Jo Anne a just a few days ago, my competitor aka Jo Anne cannot stop talking about me or stalking me. But, everyone is listening including prospective new bookings. While Jo Anne is busy talking I’m busy working. I don’t care about that trademark and gave it up knowingly, willingly and intentionally. 

Trademarks don’t earn you business. Only you can do that. Limiting myself and my staff to Texas? NEVER. We travel baby. 

The inept trademark attorney I had hired to file the trademark was a blessing in disguise. How so? The name would have “put me in a box of only performing prison weddings in Texas” but, fate and my ability to overcome obstacles along with a dash of divine intervention and entrepreneurship are why and how I didn’t care about a trademark or a name that would have effectively limited our audience and subsequently, our services to Texas. 

I effectively threw that “geographically limiting” Prison trademark idea straight into the trash instead. 

Prison weddings occur even in other countries, I love to travel and I love to meet new friends. Worldwide prison weddings? Count me and my Texas Twins Events Team in. We will see ya all at the prison! 

Our services are available to many states and our success has a few folks shaking their fists but, our success comes entirely from happy clients, referrals and stellar work ethics. Loyalty is earned. 

My competitors, spies and internet trolls should take a page from my playbook and treat each and every client with the same degree of attention that we do but, common sense is like breath spray. The people who need it the most refuse to use it and get up in your face anyway. Jo Anne’s hometown friend attempting to discredit me with an erroneous complaint regarding my honest FB post and subsequent warning  “advising anyone hiring a TDCJ Officiant to first verify their credentials with Huntsville” was surprising to say the least but the “clown posse” and their antics have continued and even accelerated the past few days. Who cares? I’m working with the clients my competition COULD HAVE HAD if they had bothered to perform the task they had initially been retained to provide. 

“Trust, Honor, & Integrity are the building blocks of success. “Your CHARACTER says a LOT about YOU, even IF you aren’t LISTENING, everybody ELSE is.”

Jo Anne followed up her FB tagging Wednesday morning with more trash talking of while I was with a traditional client in a meeting and preparing to drive to Ferguson Unit immediately afterwards.

While still with my client, a negative review  notification from someone who “just happened to be friends with my competitor, Jo Anne AND even lived in the SAME town (Splendora) as Jo Anne aka the “competitor.” The notification came through to my cell phone. 

Jo Anne and her friend “aka the derogatory reviewer” who’s never retained my services  or even spoke to me (although she said that I was rude in her review) both live in Splendora, Texas. Now Jo Anne and the clown posse were making up fake reviews. 

This “reviewer” who had never hired me or my staff or at the very least even had ANY degree of contact with Texas Twins Events OR TDCJ Officiant whatsoever apparently thought that “leaving a derogatory review for a business you’ve never had any connection to was acceptable behavior.” It isn’t. 

The first Splendora, Texas derogatory and defamatory review would later be followed up by a former client of Jo Anne’s. 

Jo Anne and her posse were too busy laughing with themselves to recognize that “tracking the common denominator of these fake reviews was being conducted” while I was driving to Ferguson Unit. 

The common denominator? Jo Anne and her FB post tagging me. Stirring the chili and getting her friends fired up to unjustly attempt to sully my name. 

Here’s a tip ladies, I keep records of every phone call. Every email. Every text message. Every visitor to ANY Wendy Wortham site and I had NEVER had any INTERACTION with EITHER OF YOU. 

Also, phony reviewers, you were both “late to the party” attempting to hide your friends list connecting you both to Jo Anne. 

The first derogatory and unscrupulous “review” was posted to my page “Prison Weddings With Wendy Wortham” was within an hour of Jo Anne tagging me on FB regarding that trademark I had let go months ago. 

Jo Anne just can’t help herself. She trolls my social media, visits my sites several times a day and even subscribes to all of my blogs. Jo Anne is obsessed with me, my twin and my staff as well as her previous clients smiling at photo shoots after we marry them. On one occasion, Jo Anne even called her former client from Hodge Unit after seeing that I had married her. WTF? 

Jo Anne is literally obsessed with me AND her former clients. But, unlike most crazy stalkers, this competitor and her “friends” weren’t going to ruin my day with their preposterous antics. 

Fake reviews from her own connections? The childishness never ends but, makes it obvious that my stalking competitor has far too much time on her hands. 

Before arriving at Ferguson Unit, one of Jo Anne’s former clients left ANOTHER derogatory review. This type of rampant stupidity is why 24 hours later, my site would crash due to heavy traffic. All because my crazy stalker wanted to draw attention to me? Yes. 

Who needs a publicist or marketing person when your stalker aka competitor Jo Anne cannot stop talking about you and subsequently directing traffic and new bookings to you. 

Hell, Jo Anne, if you keep talking about me, I’m going to be forced to hire more personnel. 

By tagging me on FB and effectively, redirecting YOUR own traffic directly to my services, aka Jo Anne had increased my bookings from 1-3 clients this past week to 12.  

Due to this “redirected traffic,” from FB tagging and trash talking of Jo Anne and her two cronies, my site crashed with an overflow of new business inquiries and bookings between 05-15-2019 to 05-17-2019. 

Had my Jo Anne NOT HAVE TAGGED ME, my newly booked clients might not have even found me on FB. After all, they were on her page FIRST.

I was at the Tarrant County clerks office Friday at 2PM helping my client, Payton get her marriage license and completely unaware of website issues when a call from a Le Blanc prospect that I had spoke with on Tuesday while driving back from San Saba Unit came in. 

Thankfully, my client was thrilled to get her license and can’t wait to get married Sunday. 

Since visitation is on certain days, Payton took the online Twogether In Texas course to waive her waiting period. 

My Le Blanc client had also attempted to follow up and contact me through TDCJOfficiant.com regarding planning her Prison wedding Wednesday while I was at Ferguson Unit. When she didn’t get an answer, she called me “I emailed you a few days ago and haven’t heard back from you.” 

Alarmed, I called my site manager to find out what was going on and resolve the issue. I would spend all night Friday contacting everyone that had attempted to use the contact us link at the same time. 

I’m really looking forward to meeting my latest bookings and especially my Le Blanc client who saved the day for me by giving me a heads up. 

Jo Anne has to have paid placement on google. She “has to” because I don’t need to and continue to outbook her over and over. 

My creative content and quality websites put me at top placement in google search engines. I’m there for free and have been all along. Paid placement? No thank you. 

My twin sister and I have filmed a television pilot based on our business, The Pawning Planners, we have signed with seven production companies regarding show concepts about our businesses and we are currently negotiating with other production companies and networks as well as writing a book and continuing to rebrand and expand. 

While juggling our numerous responsibilities, inmate wedding services have continued to grow beyond any expectation I could have anticipated. We now service inmate weddings in several states. 

Had my site not crashed due to this “redirected traffic” from Jo Anne, the timeline of the “site occurrence” wouldn’t be so “easy to pinpoint.” But, it was. My web designer tracks visitors and urls. The moment my competitor tagged me, my site traffic increased. Boomerang clients? You bet. What goes around comes around. 

I will (as usual) give these new clients the care and courtesy they should have gotten from my competitor who was far too focused on attempting to tarnish my reputation to realize what she was doing. 

Truth is always stranger than fiction. My reputation is why I’m successful. So successful that I’ve added TDCJ Officiants and expanded into other states. 

Client loyalty is a priceless commodity in business. Earn it and you won’t have time to stalk me Jo Anne. Stop trying to figure out why I’m successful and start trying to figure out how to be successful instead. I know, it’s a totally new concept but, try it. Stop stalking me and start focusing on you.

For those unaware of how I got started in the Prison wedding business, it’s actually an interesting story. A creative request to officiate a prison wedding a few years ago and my willingness to undergo the process to help a stranger literally changed the dynamics of our bookings. True story. 

I have never once even considered advertising because at the time I agreed to become a TDCJ Officiant, I already had commitments to my existing clients on the books from Texas Twins Events and The Pawning Planners. My evenings and weekends were booked out nearly two years and I didn’t see how I could possibly squeeze new clients into my schedule. 

I had expected my first prison wedding to be my last request for an inmate wedding because I didn’t realize there were other people who just like Misty needed a TDCJ Officiant. I wasn’t planning to rebrand and expand again. But, due to the demand,  it happened. Texas Twins Events expanded and rebranded a second time in five years to include inmate weddings.

Inmate weddings actually opened a new door and took us into a completely new direction. An adventure of rebranding and expanding with new business bookings based entirely on my first happy Prison Wedding client, Misty at Estes Unit. 

I helped Misty with her prison wedding and by doing so, I was gifted with new opportunities and a new direction. 

For those unaware, I merged Texas Twins Events and Texas Twins Treasures to create a barter option aka The Pawning Planners in 2014. As usual, Cindy and I were pioneers. No one in the events industry had ever considered bartering. We did it first. We have never been afraid to invest in ourselves or finding solutions for others. We are entrepreneurs. 

While our competitors in the events industry laughed at the Texas Twins and the idea of bartering event services, we flew to Hollywood and filmed a sizzle reel. Laughter is the best medicine other event vendors who also troll our sites. 

While our competitors stalked us, we filmed a television pilot. While others expected us to fail, we continued to expand and rebrand. WITHOUT EVER ADVERTISING! The need existed to find a way to fund Dream Events and my twin and I found a solution. The need also existed for honesty and transparency in the Prison Wedding business and again, we grew to address the requests. 

As usual, the moment other event vendors who used to laugh at our idea to create a People Over Profit based event business only to later offer a barter option, no longer laugh. We help ANY income level. 

These same vendors who thought “Prison Weddings were controversial” also thought (years ago) that being openly LBGT friendly would destroy their business are now (so they say) LBGT friendly. Better late than never ya all. 

As other event vendors hid their affiliation with LBGT clients years ago, my Texas Twins Events Team welcomed anyone from any background. Yes, we are different. We are fearless and undaunted by haters who cannot understand why our unconventional business methods are far more effective. 

How our businesses that have never advertised or paid for promotion have continued to succeeded, grow and thrive surprises everyone. Our clients are our priority. Their loyalty is why year after year we continue to grow. Surprised? Don’t be. Referrals are priceless. 

Building a client base requires YOUR dedication. Welcoming ANY client? ANY request? We have and our dedication and resilience within the events industry is a story all of its own. 

From weddings to purple unions to estate liquidation to flipping trades to prison weddings, birthday parties and baptisms, my family and I didn’t care about the people laughing. We cared about the people coming to us for help. We focused on our clients. 

We took the risks no other event vendor was willing to and we would do it all over again. We have continued to grow because our clients are family to us. They are a fabric in our lives. Our relationship doesn’t end after an event. Quite the contrary, our relationships are friendships with our former clients. 

Inmate weddings take place during the week and therefore wouldn’t interfere with existing bookings on the weekends making adding prison weddings to our services the “perfect fit.”

Since I began offering inmate wedding services, we have continued to grow based entirely on our reputation and client referrals. There is no need for me to advertise nor has there ever been. 
Cindy and I think differently than our competitors. We have never “fit a mold” and we have always educated ourselves about any aspect of any product that we have ever sold. Product knowledge is essential in ANY industry. 

My sister and I are both survivors. We left home at 15 and made our own way in life. We didn’t have friends or even family to help us. The reason we started Texas Twins Events years ago was because we didn’t have anyone to help us with our own weddings. Why not? Our mother was a heroin addict who abandoned us as children. We came from a broken family and had no friends or family to help us plan our own weddings. We started our business based on our own experiences. True story. We wanted to give people the weddings we didn’t have ourselves. 

What we DID HAVE was the tenancity to succeed. We are passionate and resilient. We are dedicated and determined. For our competitors, we are also a force to be reckoned with. Client loyalty has expanded our business year after year after year. 

For those wondering how we got here, a little background…. At 18, I was a commercial actress with Mel Tillis doing Whataburger commercials. 

When I needed nice clothing, I became a model to create a fabulous wardrobe and go into high end sales. To sell, you need to look successful and I did. To sell, you need to earn a clients trust and I did. My twin and I had no one to fall back on. We only had each other and we are the most honest salespeople you will ever meet. If we wouldn’t buy it, we didn’t sell it. 

People buy from us because they trust us and we don’t ever let them down. Cindy and I have never been afraid to roll up our sleeves or get our hands dirty either. 

The Pawning Planners (Texas Twins) can put up fences or strip, stain and reupholster trades and more. This twin team knows the value of hard and honest work. We have helped people that no one else was willing to help on more than one occasion. For YEARS. 

The broken fence (below) was a request for help from someone who had no money or barter but, needed our help. We jumped in and rented a truck to pick up free panels and poles to help someone we had never met? Yes, we most certainly did. 

You’ve never met anyone like us because we care about others. We are passionate and perseverant. Finding someone to donate panels and poles? Sure on Craigslist. 

The person contacting us for help with a broken fence didn’t have a truck. We went to Home Depot and rented one. 

The fence person came to us “because she heard we help people.” We do. Occasionally, we give insight to people in order for them to help themselves too. Cindy and I are entrepreneurs who became successful because failure was never an option. 

What made Cindy and I “different” made us sought after. We are the people we would like to meet. 

“You cannot buy a referral OR a happy client. You earn their business by dedication and exceeding their expectations. 

Throughout my life, only once have I needed to advertise and it was within an industry I had no prior experience with. What was it? Luxury car sales. I can sell anything. 

During a divorce, I needed a car and upon realizing that luxury car sales offered free demos, took a job at Cadillac. In order to gain my own client base in a wholly new career path, I used my previous experience as a former print and commercial model to run my own ads in Country clubs across Texas. This “type of advertising” had never been done before in the car sales industry but, I’m a pioneer and my creative advertising campaign paid off for me as a Cadillac salesperson. 

Direct marketing specifically to consumers that could afford to buy luxury cars was the most successful investment I had ever made at that time in my life. Even I was shocked at the success of my unique idea to market myself. I generated clients booking by appointment and I had more clients than I could handle. 

While other salesmen laughed at marketing campaign, they didn’t laugh long. Clients generated through my creative marketing campaign referred their friends and family to me. 

Within a four year window, I was awarded again and again for customer satisfaction and excellence. I retired from Cadillac “on top.” 

My reputation sold all of those vehicles. I earned the trust of my clients and their loyalty. 

After two years, I no longer needed to pay to advertise. I had more business than I could handle because I was willing to be different. To do something different. To invest in myself and stellar work ethics. I knew if I could bring clients in, I would sell and sell I did. 

I don’t fit in a box. Clients I had previously sold Cadillac’s to booked again. This time for event services. 

Former Cadillac clients book new services and ALL of our clients for Texas Twins Events, Texas Twins Treasures, The Pawning Planners and Prison Weddings ARE REFERRED CLIENTS. 

Dedication and dilligence are how we have grown year after year. Happy clients continue to refer their friends and family to us again and again. We build relationships not sales numbers. 

You can’t afford to buy loyalty or referrals. No one can. Loyalty and subsequently, referral business is earned only through building trust with a client.” 

Cindy and I stay busy with interviews. After all, there isn’t a business as versatile as ours anywhere. We especially enjoyed a radio interview together Thursday afternoon regarding people over fifty starting their own business. 

The most important aspect of any business is to expect a learning curve. I didn’t expect to rebrand and expand in order to address low income clients but the need existed and The Pawning Planners was born. I didn’t expect to rebrand and expand again to address inmate wedding services either but, a creative request for an inmate wedding is why and how Texas Twins Events rebranded and expanded again. I’m open minded. 

From rich to poor, our clients are the biggest mix of people from any background you could imagine. But, by rebranding and expanding, our services became available to any income level for any service. 

I’ve been in sales my entire life and the key to sales is building quality in the product and establishing a relationship with the client. Unlike my competitors, I have. 

Although we are based in Texas, Texas Twins Events has offered destination event services from the inception. We’ve never been limited to Texas. We have no plans to start now either. The Texas Twins Travel! 

I’m not ONLY familiar with competing businesses because at WorthamWorld, I am also familiar with competing neighbors.

Friday morning, I was kicking off my morning at 5AM, and I was surprised to see Maria (the maid next door) walking towards Foxy and I. After all, I’m trying to walk my dog in silk pajamas unnoticed. I had a long day ahead of me and wasn’t planning to deal with my entitled neighbor or her brow beaten housekeeper, Maria. 

Ninety nine percent of my neighbors don’t work. There’s a lot of “old money” in Westover Hills, TX. From old mansions to exotic cars and a 90 year old grocery store that sells items 50% or more above “traditional” grocery stores, watching maids walk from the bus to work every morning is a regular occurrence. 

I like Roy Pope Grocery and I realize convenience is expensive so, I enjoy walking to the market with a parking lot full of Maserati’s, Porsche, Mercedes and Rolls Royce vehicles. These folks could walk too but they prefer to drive and leave their cars running. 

If you were a car thief, my neighborhood is the neighborhood to “score” at. Occasionally, I will drive my Santa Fe SUV or my Nissan Rogue over to Roy Pope if I’m returning from a booking. 

My “flawless neighbors” in full makeup and fancy cars give me the stink eye though for a number of reasons but mainly because I work and they don’t. 

Also, watching film crews and clients come and go at WorthamWorld raises a few eyebrows around here. My neighbors are far from liberal or open minded. 

I occasionally pity my neighbors the same way I laugh back at my competitors who once laughed at me. The “affluent housewives” looking down on others would certainly have a fairly tough time surviving on their own should their their husband’s ever leave. I’ve seen it happen. I will see it happen again. 

I’ve never looked down my nose at anyone because I’m old and I’m wise and I happily say hello to my “Beverly Hills Wannabe” neighbors on a regular basis. 

Apparently though, my snootiest neighbor had seen me leave my driveway with Foxy  Friday morning and had sent Maria over to ask me “have you called the city about mowing the estate next door to you?” 

I (momentarily) considered marching over to my neighbors house and getting snappy but poor Maria was just a messenger. Her mistress (most likely) would take out her frustration on Maria if I had. 

A few times over the years, I’ve driven Maria home. Maria is hard working and supports her family. Maria is too good for her mistress who “likes to keep up appearances” in Westover Hills with perfect makeup and clothing to go check her mail or drive to the Country Club. She’s an Instagram neighbor. Her life on social media looks envious but, reality isn’t social media ya all. 

Insta life and real life are far from the same. My neighbor is most likely depressed and struggling with alcoholism. I remind myself daily to pity her rather than resent her but, her treatment of Maria bothers me to no an end. 

If I ever cave in and allow my husband to hire a maid, I’m going to save Maria from being under the thumb of my neighbor. The house next door to me upsets everyone in my neighborhood. But not to the point of them taking any action other than telling my husband or I to “do something about it.” They all have lawn men and could easily send their workers over but, have never done so. Instead, they complain to us to “do something.” 

A few of my “entitled neighbors” have all day to call the city but in my neighborhood,  it’s regularly expected that my husband and I do it for them. “Your husband is a developer. He knows everybody downtown. Surely he has a few minutes to take care of this for the betterment of the neighborhood Wendy.”

The rambling eyesore next door to my home bothers me to such an extent that I’ve hired yard men for years to clean it up. I’m currently on strike though as the neighbor on the other side of it has decided to pay yard men to “cut only four feet into the abandoned estate because you hire people to handle that yard.” Humph. This statement lit me up. 

Six years of paying yard men to clean up someone else’s property and the attitude of all of my neighbors expecting me to continue to pay for the upkeep are what actually led to my strike. Mowing four feet of that yard is ridiculous. When I pay yard men to clean up that estate, I don’t tell them to “just do my side and leave the other side.” 

My husband is equally sick and tired of maintaining the adjoining property with no benefit whatsoever as well as running construction on his numerous developments and dealing with the city regarding the abandoned estate next door is the last thing he wants to do although it happens to be “related to our neighborhood as opposed to his development neighborhoods.” 

My husband and I are on strike about paying to upkeep a property solely because we are forced to look at it next door. What’s wrong with that neighbor? He could sell the lot within days for easily $500k but chooses to let raccoons move in and trees to overtake the property. I don’t get it. 

I told Maria I would call the city on my way downtown and report the three home decaying estate next door to the city again rather than telling her what I REALLY thought about her boss while my haughty neighbor looked on at both of us. 

Poor Maria rides the bus every morning then walks to my neighbors estate. I see her as I’m walking Foxy. I’ve always felt sorry for her. 

Once she arrives at work, her mistress makes her change into a maids uniform. It’s belittling to her. I know she hates wearing it as much as I hate seeing her wear it. 

A few of my neighbors would benefit from manual labor and a good days work. The neighbor Maria works for is one of them. 

Often I think a few of these neighbors must be so far upside down in debt that I nearly expect to see the repo man coming over to pick up their fancy cars but, it hasn’t happened yet. 

Driving exotic cars is something that you will never see me do. We pay cash for new suvs every two years and don’t owe on credit cards or anything else. My husband and I aren’t flashy and we like it that way. 

Rich people get on my nerves but more than that, housewives who run around in tennis outfits ALL DAY while driving $400k vehicles and acting superior to anyone who isn’t driving a fabulous car REALLY GET ON MY NERVES. 

Entitled neighbors aside, I (as usual) had a jam packed weekend of client meetings and events. As my nosy neighbors watch our three suvs and a four wheel drive truck pull out of my driveway at 6:30AM after going over the weekend schedule for my Texas Twins Events Team schedule this morning, I ignored my nosy neighbor rather than giving her the finger. It’s not easy. Her opinion of our clients lights me up. 

Poor Maria is working for a tyrant over there. The fact that my idiot neighbor forces Maria to wear a starched maids outfit to identify her position at that estate infuriates me. 

But, I can’t save Maria. Her position in life bothers me though. One day, I hope Maria does give her mistress the finger one day and finds someone else to work for that treats her with respect.  

Someone needs to “knock that invisible tiara” off my “full of herself neighbors head” but, it won’t be me because I don’t have the time and more importantly, I live here. 

Last weekend my always “determined to impress others neighbor” hired valets who blocked all of our driveways for her party. I was forced to go over there and advise her that three of us couldn’t get out of our driveways. Her response? “Well, go find Maria to tell the valets as you can see I’m entertaining.” Ugh. Poor Maria. 

Rich people are often the worst clients I’ve ever had. They want everything and bitch about paying for it. Although my husband and I live well, we have always treated others with respect and kindness regardless of where they work or how they earn a living. In fact, neither of us have had to work in years now. We both enjoy our work but I enjoy it far more than Matthew. Why? Because building and development incurs new problems everyday. I don’t have his problems. I jump in my SUV and head off for good times with great people. Unless of course, they are rich people and then it isn’t always wine and roses. 

I prefer prison wedding clients. Why? Because my clients are friendly, excited and thankful that’s why. Rich people never are. I’ve limited my traditional bookings for years with affluent clients because of this fact. I turn down new booking requests on a regular basis from “affluent” clients. They are the most demanding people in the world to work with. 

When you don’t have to work to earn a living, you don’t put up with someone handing you an apron to serve food when they hired you to coordinate and officiate. Rich clients don’t want to pay for additional staff. They assume because you have a team that your team will volunteer. Wake up! I prefer to say no and move on to clients we ENJOY working with. 

Rich people think everyone is “day labor.” They assume you have nowhere to be and all day to get there. They also think they are your ONLY CLIENTS. 

I WILL ALWAYS prefer our low to middle class bookings because real people treat you like you would want to be treated. My arm has to be twisted to take on a “big event.” Big Events will always be a hassle. I never look forward to them. 

My haughty neighbor knows I perform prison weddings and LBGT events and “doesn’t approve of rainbow unions or prison weddings.” She actually stopped me one day to tell me about her opinion. I stopped myself from telling her to go F herself. It isn’t easy being me. 

I encounter stupidity from others (mainly my neighbors but occasionally, my competitors) who think their opinion matters to me on a regular basis.

This morning I’m starting my day at Green Bay Unit in Fort Worth. This is a massive detention center that I’m meeting clients at at least twice a week. If you haven’t heard of it, I will include more information and warn you that phone calls are $15 each. Do not assume that these calls are $5 each because they aren’t. 

Tarrant County TX – Green Bay Facility has a phone program where inmates make outbound calls only, you cannot call into jail. Since you are paying for those calls don’t make it a habit of accepting collect-calls, they are over $15 EACH. 

The alternative is to set up an account through their third-party phone company which charges steep fees for each minute used. You are paying for them to call you. 

The preposterous amount of money that Keller charges had one of my clients mothers calling me crying. $775 for ten phone calls? I couldn’t believe it myself. To rectify this issue, I helped Mariah and her mother draft a Letter Of Intent and report this flagrant financial abuse to the Consumer Protection Agency as well as the AG. Beware of collect phone calls ya all because it’s anyone’s guess as to what they will cost. 

The Tarrant County TX – Green Bay Facility is a County – medium detention center located at 2500 Urban Drive in Ft Worth, TX. This county jail is operated locally by the Tarrant County Sheriff’s Office and holds inmates awaiting trial or sentencing or both. 

Most of the sentenced inmates are here for less than two years. Tarrant County accepts inmates from surrounding towns, municipalities and the Ft Worth Police Department who do not have their own long-term lock-up.

There are new detainees delivered to the jail daily, the see arrest records here. Some are released after putting up bail, are released to a pretrial services caseload, are placed under supervision by a probation agency, or are released on their own recognizance with an agreement to appear in court. 

If there is no release, the inmate must wait here at the jail for their court appearance as a guest of the County, getting a bed and three square meals.

Trustees are inmates who work in the jail as cooks, as orderlies for the staff, in the laundry or in the commissary. The trustees are paid a very small amount for their time and some jail gives the trustees a few days off their sentence in exchange for their work.

When an inmate arrives in jail they are put together in a large holding cell with other inmates in the intake. While in intake they are under heightened observation. Violent and out of control inmates are segregated.

I was actually “following the groom” who had been transferred from Tarrant County Jail to Green Bay. Last week my client and I thought he was at Tarrant County but as usual, he was moved without being able to notify his fiancée. We found him again after a collect call. 

Not knowing where your loved one is continues to be upsetting to my clients. Luckily, my Green Bay client has an attorney I know well. I know most attorneys in Fort Worth and Dallas from my years spent in courtrooms as well as socially at fundraisers for Kay Granger and from Ridglea or Shady Oaks Country Club. 

Unlike my snobby neighbor who will spend her summer laying around the Country Club pool sipping martinis and trying to look sexy, I only go to “the club” for client meetings, social functions and the occasional lunch or dinner with my husband. 

I have no idea why my neighbor hasn’t died yet of alcohol poisoning with the ever present martini glass in her hand? I’ve never seen her without a drink regardless of what time it is. How do people function drinking 24/7? I don’t get it. 

Anyway luckily, I knew the attorney and called him to get me a notarized Absentee Affidavit for the inmate. I had a great call with him discussing both of our families and pitching him on getting married. For years now, I’ve asked when this attorney is going to get married? His internet date stories are hilarious though and if he were to finally meet someone and hire me to marry them, I’d really miss his hit and miss blind date sagas. 

Speaking of Tarrant County Jail, I will be back over there today to meet my Dallas County Jail client who was bumped to Tarrant County due to a warrant. Following the Groom is actually a regular occurrence. 

I’m at Rivercrest for a client meeting and lunch this afternoon and no I don’t like watercress sandwiches. My husband loves them and Rivercrest is famous for them. Yuck. 

My husband pretty much lived at Rivercrest Country Club most of his life. His father, grandfather and entire family were members of this stuffy old above 70 years old clique. 

Rivercrest isn’t the fun Country Club of Fort Worth. Both Rivercrest and Colonial are the “stuffy” clubs of Fort Worth. 

The fun folks are members of Ridglea and Shady Oaks or both. For people like me who hate golf, comparing the greens is totally lost on me. Every golf course looks the same. 

My husband could spend hours explaining the differences of the greens at Rivercrest, Colonial, Shady Oaks and Ridglea but the conversation would put me to sleep in seconds.

I’m considering cutting this Rivercrest client loose for more than ONE REASON. First, she calls constantly and when she isn’t calling, her mother is. Secondly, this wedding is at the club and eleven months from now. Nearly another year of constant phone calls? Hell, I need to bill by the call with this client AND her mother. 

It’s an ass whipping to deal with Inlaws and Outlaws in the planning process. This bride begged me to take this job and my husband “knows the family.” 

My husband and I constantly bicker the “valid points” he thinks there are regarding my consistent issues about taking on “affluent clients.” I prefer not to. 

My husband doesn’t know how difficult rich people are to work for in the event planning business but, I do. Cindy does. My husband thinks “working these larger events is a great way to expand.” 

My husband didn’t expect prison weddings to take off and even today cannot believe how successful this extension of services would be. 

A few affluent clients won’t take no for an answer after “telling their friends the Texas Twins are doing their event.” Heavy sigh. I wish they wouldn’t tell people they booked with us long before I’ve ever considered taking the booking. Now you feel pressured to commit. They realize this and then, you are under their thumb. Jeez. 

Today, I’m going to have to go over a few ground rules about these constant phone calls from “traditional clients.” Last night, my bride thought her ring wasn’t big enough. People don’t marry based on the size of the stone. I found this troubling phone call to be a “sign of things to come.” 

Occasionally, “people who have it all can never have enough.” I’ve had enough already and this wedding isn’t until next year. You get the point. I had a lengthy discussion about her finding fault with her ring, the napkins the venue the this and that and taking the time to call me to call so and so and tell them she’s unhappy. I advised her to use the phone and address the issue directly and remove calling me to call them from this circle of chaos or… start paying me by the call. I think I’ve got this covered now but, we will see. 

I’m going to once again go over the truth that guards are not professional photographers. PLEASE DO NOT FILE A COMPLAINT regarding UNIT PHOTOS. Guards are doing the best they can and often with less than professional quality equipment. 

Certain Units have the worst photos and we can’t change the outcome of a bad photo. What we can do is accept that it’s not going to be an amazing shot an move on. 

Hodge and Estes take amazing photos. Seriously. The lighting and everything is as close to perfect as you can get in a Prison.  Coffield is hit and miss. One day the photo might be okay and the next it’s hard to even identify myself in a Unit photo. 

But, these are the only photos we are going to have of the inmate so, let’s keep it light and lower our expectations of high quality photography at your unit wedding. 

I reviewed an interesting request yesterday while in the parking lot waiting on my Mercado Event Center client. “We are looking for a female officiant that is non-denominational with zero religious agenda. Although we are a man and a woman, our ideal officiant is someone that has performed same sex marriage ceremonies in the past or would be willing to in the future. For us that’s a screener right there.” 

The only thing I was uncertain about was being liberal. Was I? I’ve never thought about it. I’m open minded and always have been. I decided to ask my husband. I’ve never put a label on myself but, my husband was roaring with hilarity at my question. “Oh my gosh! You are the most liberal person I’ve ever met in my life. I have to play down how liberal and non judgmental you are on a daily basis to conservative people who begin a conversation with “I saw you wife on the news or such and such show. I heard your wife on the radio. Your wife goes to Prisons? Doesn’t she have enough clients to address? Your wife shouldn’t be working she doesn’t need to work. Tell her to go learn to play bridge at the club.” Wendy, the description of liberal should have your name in it. Lol. The definition is actually: open to new behavior or opinions and willing to discard traditional values.” Hmm. I guess I AM LIBERAL!

Go play play bridge at the Country Club? I would rather jump off a bridge. F that. 

I decided to go ahead and take on this new booking because I love curious and interesting propositions. They weren’t LBGT but were interested solely in someone who performs LBGT Weddings? What the? I’m interested. It’s difficult to surprise me but this guy did. 

Between Willow Lake Event Center, Villagio and Belltower client meetings yesterday, Cindy and I had two radio interviews. Both were fun but Cindy and I especially enjoyed Karen’s. Her story of meeting her husband on Match and not realizing until buying their marriage license he had lied about his age by 6 years was hilarious. Normally, women lie about their age but, the way she told that story was absolutely hilarious. We loved talking with Karen!

I’m meeting my Goree Unit bride this afternoon at the Tarrant County Clerk to hold her hand buying the marriage license. My Crain Unit Groom made the same request. Buying a license if you’ve never done it is scary for my clients. When I don’t have time to accompany those needing someone with them to buy the license, my staff does based on who is available. Don’t be scared. It’s just a process. 

No one in Tarrant or Dallas county is going to be rude or confrontational with you because you are marrying an inmate. You will be just fine. But, if you would feel better having someone with you, just let me know and I will make arrangements. 

I’ve had several inquiries for California Prison Weddings so I will elaborate on requirements. For the past year, I’ve stacked inmate weddings to work in travel expenses. It’s not an problem to stack inmate weddings. In fact, I regularly stack in Texas and Louisiana as well as California. Beginning August 1st though, Leigh Ann will be handling California inmate weddings and the need to stack will be removed. 

My son and his wife will continue to handle “Houston runs” to county jails in adjoining cities. 

Cindy is joining me as a TDCJ Officiant due to the number of requests. We will continue to travel as a team wherever we can because we love our road trips but, in an effort to help everyone, bringing Cindy on board to Officiate prison weddings is a necessity. My son is more comfortable at county jail Weddings as his wife. 

Hoping you have an amazing day and really looking forward to being back on site at Villagio… 

TDCJ San Saba Unit To Ferguson Unit- TDCJ Prison Weddings With Wendy Wortham…

Driving to meet Joel yesterday, I felt as if I had known him for years. His journey was one of resilience and faith. Joel works with veterans struggling with PTSD. A few years ago, Joel was one of those vets himself. He now also works as a DJ on Road To Hope Radio discussing topics pertaining to veterans as well as being an outreach coordinator at the PTSD Corporation of America. 

Joel is dedicated to making a difference and changing the lives of veterans struggling with PTSD. 

I could relate to Joel’s passion as my brother, Jerry was in several wars during his twenty years in the Navy and my brother in law, Steve Daniel spent eight years at Camp Anaconda as well as being one of the fuel tank drivers under attack during the Good Friday roadside bombing in Iraq. 

At the time, Steve had only been at Camp Anaconda a few short months. Delivering jet fuel in Iraq was far more dangerous than trucking groceries across America but, work for truck drivers was so slow in 2003 that Steve felt he had no choice but to take on work in Iraq with his hazardous materials truck driving credentials. I spoke with Joel about my brother, my brother in law and my niece, Leigh Ann’s husband, Alex who is currently preparing to station in Oxnard, California after a few months training in San Diego this July. 

Joel had a smile and excitement that was contagious. While driving to the Unit, rain and lightning were the furthest thought I had on Tuesday that started out beautifully in Fort Worth but within 30 minutes of San Saba the weather changed quickly and dramatically for the Texas Twins who were as usual traveling together to a Texas Prison. 

Our road trips are fun, full of adventure and always interesting. There’s nothing we enjoy more than “hitting the road.” From junk shops to out of the way cafes, Cindy and I love having the time together that 30 years in sales took from us while working for different companies.

Joel had sent me a text that read “hope you brought an umbrella.” We were seeing light drizzle and lightening miles away but completely unprepared for the sudden downpour that made it difficult to see clearly. 

I had Cindy answer Joel for me “I not only brought an umbrella for me but one for you too buddy see you soon.” I plan ahead. I’m “everyone’s mother.” If my SUV doesn’t come well stocked with whatever I need hours from home, it’s difficult to find the one thing I forgot. Because of this, I make detailed lists. I don’t forget anything because I’m OCD. 

Rolling into the visitor lot at San Saba, it was a hike in the downpour to get to the Unit but, Joel and I laughed and jumped puddles together to get there a little soaked but ready to “get the wedding going” he had waited for. Planning a prison wedding can be a time consuming process. 

Joel’s rainy day wedding was literally a “Rainbow In The Dark” on a cold and dreary day. 

Joel loved the boutenier I had created with bling and pink accents to coordinate with his shirt and jacket. 

I had a wide variety of other props but due to the rain only chose a few to keep him from getting drenched outside my SUV parked next to his. I commissioned a wooden “Mr” sign as a surprise gift to send him with his wedding photos. I love surprising and delighting my clients with unexpected gifts. Joel’s fiancée was beaming as she entered the conference room and a bit nervous as three guards watched the ceremony. She was beautiful and excited. I love my clients and making their day special. 

By the time we finally meet whether it’s at a venue for my traditional clients or a Prison, I know a lot about them and they know a lot about me. 

More often than not, my clients and I have spent weeks and occasionally even months on the phone or texting when not emailing updates to each other up to wedding day. Leaving the Unit, my happy new clients both gave me a hug. The relief at finally being married after the long and arduous prison planning process is always evident with my clients. They are finally married and finally through the process. 

Joel is looking forward to planning their vow renewal upon the release of his beautiful bride with my team as am I. 

Vow Renewals are a literal celebration of freedom, resilience and strength for my TDCJ clients as well as my other inmate marriage clients. Whenever possible, I meet my former clients on release day at the Walls Unit. It’s truly a celebration. Driving back to Fort Worth, I check in with my Ferguson bride about timelines to meet her today. I had three clients at three Units in the same day. My first was at Ferguson some three hours from my location but, my client meeting held me up this morning getting me off to a later start than I had planned. 

I was planning to arrive an hour early at Ferguson to handle bridal photos before heading to the Unit at 1PM but didn’t arrive until 12:30 at Ferguson for my 1PM wedding. No matter, we headed in together to clear and get ready to meet the Groom. 

My bride looked stunning in white slacks and heels. I wore heels years ago as a clothing, print and commercial model but these days prefer flats. 

While waiting, my bride told me she was nervous as the guard told us both “we aren’t professional photographers.” I laughed as did my client since I’m well aware that guards are doing the best they can regarding inmate photos.

The Groom couldn’t stop smiling. He was thrilled and excited. I love what I do. The happiest moments at a Prison are releases and prison weddings. 

Posing for photos was so much fun with my newly married couple! The love and the journey to finally get married are often emotional for my clients. The Groom touching his heart and reading his vows was a sweet and precious moment for the bride and I although at Ferguson Unit our “backdrop” were open cages and scattered chairs. Moving away from the cages used for non contact visits in order to “cut them” from the wedding photos, my clients nervously held hands. 

Contact is within strict guidelines. Holding hands, two closed mouth kisses, one hug. Inappropriate contact is strictly prohibited. 

I love handwritten vows and creative input from clients making their wedding as special as they are. 

Finding good lighting inside a Unit for photos is difficult but, I think our guard did an amazing job quite frankly. 

Leaving the Unit after waiting for our photos to print, my bride followed me to my SUV for a wide array of prop options. 

My rolling photo booth changes frequently and I’m constantly adding or replacing inventory. The sequin veil was an instant hit as were the tiaras and fascinators. From lanterns to signs to bouquets, flower balls, banners and more, my SUV is often a treasure trove of fun items that make photo shoots as creative as my clients imaginations are. I love an opportunity to share the joy of clients on wedding day. Jumping back into my SUV to head over to Huntsville, Texas to meet my next client, I ran over a retread that had come off a semi and luckily didn’t blow out my own tire doing so. My suvs are road warriors. 

I’ve had a few escapades on back roads to Texas Prisons and once even hitched a ride after hitting a deer with a truck driver in Tennessee Colony. Nothing and I mean nothing keeps me from showing up for my clients! Whether it’s with a buzzard sticking out of my broken windshield or the horrific smell of an errant skunk I was unable to keep from running over, my clients know they can count on me. 

Backroads are full of semi trucks throwing rocks, work boots, tires and more. Staying alert while fielding calls from my Texas Twins Events Clients as well as my TDCJ Clients usually takes a copilot but today, Cindy was working Parker County Jail. 

My son and his wife were covering Louisiana prison weddings and my niece was still editing photos from last weekend. Two weddings on Mother’s Day with family photos thrown in had her swamped and everyone else was at another booking. I don’t mind driving alone I simply don’t answer emails or texts until I’m in a parking lot and off the road. 

Leigh Ann’s family photos were as usual hilarious with our family. My husband was busy dealing with one of his developments and Cindy’s husband was on the road in New York so, as usual the lone male in our family of females on Sunday was my son. He’s a bit of a ham. 

My youngest grandniece, Madyson adores my son though and my son has decided not to have children since he “has four dogs and will have twins like everyone else.” 

The truth is that twins run on both sides of our family and my son isn’t too far off. However, his wife does want children and one day this “baby discussion” is going to come up again for my son and his wife. My niece, Stephaney is doing well and back on track again. We’ve paved a tough road with my grandnieces mother but, once again, we’ve got her back on track. 

Photos with the twins mom the last 14 years have been rare as normally Stephaney preferred to be anywhere other than with us. That’s changed now though and family time has become a priority. 

With two sets of twins, young Madyson, Leigh Ann and her younger sister, Stephaney, my son was more comfortable behind the camera than in front of it but, we managed to get a few photos just the same. 

I’m off to Green Bay Unit and Palo Pinto County Jail tomorrow and as usual, back at venues all weekend with Hughes Unit, Hutchins Unit, Robertson Unit, Torres Unit, Allred Unit, Beto Unit and Stiles Unit over the next few weeks. 

My niece, Leigh Ann will handle both Texas overflow inmate clients as well as photography, notary services and predominately California inmate weddings after July 27th. 

Cindy and I will continue to handle mainly Texas based inmate weddings as well as traditional bookings and county jail requests based on our schedules. We will still take on prison weddings and destination weddings in other states but, book early as our schedules are often burdened. 

Traditional events can run up to 2 years out for my calendar and short notice bookings or requests will be bumped to my son and his wife who work as a team and handle booking in several states as well as traditional requests for an Officiant/photography team. 

My twin grandnieces, Maryssa and Makenna are available as princess characters at birthday parties as well as flower girls and are both studying videography and photography. 

The twins work together as a team on location as do Cindy and I. Maryssa and Makenna both enjoy working with younger children on location and have been on site with my Team since they were two years old. I’ve had several model inquiries regarding Maryssa and Makenna so it should be noted that they are both currently already under contract with an agency and not interested in signing with a new company at this time. Please check back in 2020 for model or promotional inquiries for Makenna and Maryssa. 

Young Madyson is also a model for several brands and managed by her mother, Leigh Ann. For inquiries, please use the contact us link at Texas Twins Events regarding commercial or print booking information.There will as usual be more road trips, rest areas, memorable clients and great times in store for the Texas Twins. We are now handling prison weddings in several states but, our main states will continue to be California, Texas, & Louisiana although destination inmate services are still available upon special request.  

I will be offline Thursday for Iheart radio interviews with Cindy then radio interviews with Silver Linings Inspired Radio before running to Palo Printon and Parker County bookings as well as in and out of venues Friday through Sunday night. 

It’s Wedding Season and the joy of love is everywhere we go. The best job in the world? The Texas Twins would have to say “you bet!” we love what we do and do what we love for our amazing clients.

If you need to speak with me or anyone on my team about your inmate wedding, traditional event or media inquiry, please leave a detailed message or email me wendy@texastwinsevents.com we look forward to meeting ya all soon… 

The Unsworn Declaration. What Is It And Why You Cannot Obtain A Marriage License In Texas With It Instead Of An Absentee Affidavit…

My Ellis Unit client had contacted me last week regarding the law library informing her fiancée that “we are no longer notarizing Absentee Affidavits.” 

I quickly reviewed TDCJ Access to the Courts, Councils and Public Officials as I was all too well aware that an Unsworn Declaration would not substitute for an Absentee Affidavit. Thankfully, the problem of the Unsworn Declaration was effectively solved with a phone call to Ellis by me and my beautiful Ellis Unit bride now has both the Absentee Affidavit and ID ready to buy her marriage license. 

This “shift” of not notarizing inmate documents is a problem for not only the inmate but also his fiancée. Why? Because the county clerk will not accept an Unsworn Declaration in exchange for an Absentee Affidavit. 

Communication is “key” between TDCJ personnel and myself. Thankfully, I have built a stellar reputation of good relationships with TDCJ staff members when encountering a “hurdle.” Today’s blog will address the “unforeseen issues” of clients wishing to marry an inmate and the hurdle of purchasing a marriage license in Texas using an Unsworn Declaration. 

CIVIL PRACTICE AND REMEDIES CODE TITLE 6. MISCELLANEOUS PROVISIONS CHAPTER 132. 

Sec. 132.001. UNSWORN DECLARATION. (a) Except as provided by Subsection (b), an unsworn declaration may be used in lieu of a written sworn declaration, verification, certification, oath, or affidavit required by statute or required by a rule, order, or requirement adopted as provided by law.

(b) This section does not apply to a lien required to be filed with a county clerk, an instrument concerning real or personal property required to be filed with a county clerk, or an oath of office or an oath required to be taken before a specified official other than a notary public.

(c) An unsworn declaration made under this section must be:

(1) in writing; and

(2) subscribed by the person making the declaration as true under penalty of perjury.

(d) Except as provided by Subsections (e) and (f), an unsworn declaration made under this section must include a jurat in substantially the following form:

“My name is __________ _________ ____________, my

(First) (Middle) (Last)

date of birth is _________________, and my address is

_____________, ____________, _________, ____________,

(Street) (City) (State) (Zip Code)

and __________________. I declare under penalty of

(Country)

perjury that the foregoing is true and correct.

Executed in _______ County, State of ________, on the ________ day of ________, ________.

(Month) (Year)

____________________

Declarant”

(e) An unsworn declaration made under this section by an inmate must include a jurat in substantially the following form:

“My name is __________ _________ ____________, my

(First) (Middle) (Last)

date of birth is _____________________, and my inmate

identifying number, if any, is __________________. I

am presently incarcerated in ________________________

(Corrections unit name) 

in _____________, _________, _______, ____________. I

(City) (County) (State) (Zip Code)

declare under penalty of perjury that the foregoing is true and correct.

Executed on the _____ day of ________, _______.

(Month) (Year)

____________________

Declarant”

For the many people wishing to marry an inmate who assume the above Unsworn Declaration “is the same or similar or can substitute for an Absentee Declaration,” the Absentee Affidavit specifically states that the clerk “will not accept an Unsworn Declaration” ON THE TOP PARAGRAPH of the document. 

Let’s use Tarrant County for an example and note that although inmate marriage has been legal since July 28, 2015, that Absentee Affidavits at county clerks offices in Texas have yet to update the AA to reflect the use of this form pertaining to inmates. “Unsworn Declarations are not accepted.” 

The reason I’m pointing the significant variations of an Absentee Affidavit versus an Unsworn Declaration are specifically to advise you that trying to substitute one for the other will not allow you to purchase a marriage license in Texas.

Yesterday, my client from Hobbs, New Mexico planning to marry at Bridgeport Unit sent me a message upon leaving Anderson County, Texas that read “they won’t issue the marriage license because he isn’t here.” Checking the distance from Hobbs to the nearest major city in Texas, I found Lubbock to be an hour and forty five minutes from my clients location and contacted the clerks office myself while in my SUV at Green Bay Unit. 

Let’s “go over” what NOT to say if you encounter a clerk who is unfamiliar with inmate marriage. Do not say that the inmate is military. If the inmate isn’t military, the inmate still qualifies as being absent. However, many clerks (especially in smaller towns and sub courthouses) are completely unfamiliar with inmate marriage and the use of an Absentee Affidavit. This is why you need someone experienced and educated in your corner as your TDCJ Approved Officiant. 

I called Lubbock and my client is purchasing her marriage license as I write this blog from Parker County. As a person planning to marry an inmate, you may face challenges from clerks who either “don’t approve of inmate marriage” or worse, “have no idea that the same form they are familiar with can be used to purchase a license for an inmate marriage.” Rather than becoming upset or argumentative, it’s best to contact me.

A few months ago, my Michael Unit bride encountered issues in Denton County. Why? Because her Absentee Affidavit “was from another county and we can’t use their form in our office.” My Michael Unit client had called me upset about Denton County and to solve the issue of a clerk unfamiliar with inmate marriage or the use of an Absentee Affidavit, I instructed my client “to go to Tarrant County.” Since I was meeting a client at the Tarrant County Jail, offered to meet her there to purchase her marriage license. I married her at Michael Unit several weeks ago. 

Being in another state and marrying an inmate in Texas can be trying. My Florida client was married by me to an inmate at TDCJ Holliday Unit but, the process wasn’t easy. If you live in another state, I strongly suggest taking the Twogether In Texas Course online. Why? Because if you are flying to Texas, the three day waiting period can and will pose a problem to your travel arrangements if you are on a tight window. Not all of my clients can afford to take an entire week from work to marry in Texas. 

I’m including the link to Twogether since I’m well aware many third party providers are selling it at an inflated cost– Twogether In Texas Online Course. This course waives the three day waiting period and discounts your marriage license fee by $60. 

Why was House Bill 2865 passed? House Bill 2685 increased the marriage license fee to $60. However, the fee was be waived for couples who complete an eight-hour premarital class, and those couples can forgo the 72-hour waiting period to get married. 

AUSTIN – The Texas Health and Human Services Commission (HHSC) is spreading the word about a new state law, which took effect Sept. 1, 2008 that encourages couples to take premarital courses in Texas. This course began due to an increase in the cost of marriage licenses due to House Bill 2685. 

The state’s initiative, called “Twogether in Texas,” promotes marriage education classes that provide eight hours of training on communication skills, conflict resolution and other elements of a healthy marriage. Any couple who complete the class will receive a certificate that they can take to their county clerk when they apply for their marriage license. The certificate is good for one year and serves as proof that the couple is eligible for the discounted marriage license fee. The online class allows you to stop and start. The ONLY requirement is that you complete the course. You will then print your certificate. You will need to take the certificate with you along with the notarized Absentee Affidavit and TDCJ ID as well as your own ID to buy the marriage license. 

For clients encountering a “CLM status to anyone other than them” trying to get Approved to marry an inmate, the consistent issues of “this piece of paper” continue to be a horrifying surprise. Let’s first go over why any inmate who was granted contact visits by notarizing an Informal Marriage Affidavit obviously knew that it “wasn’t just a piece of paper.” TDCJ recognizes an Informal Marriage Affidavit as binding. If you are attempting to marry an inmate who is listed as being “informally married to someone other than you,” I strongly encourage you to have a serious discussion with the inmate regarding his or hers honesty relating to the issue preventing you from marrying them for a number of reasons but mainly because dishonesty isn’t the way to begin your marriage and secondly, because you have a very time consuming legal battle ahead of you. It’s also something you were wholly and completely unaware of. 

Outside of TDCJ, such Informal Marriage Affidavits must be filed in person by both parties at the clerks office. Use of an Absentee Affidavit is not allowed pertaining to an Informal Marriage Affidavit. 

The wide misuse of an Informal Marriage Affidavit in Prisons is astounding to me. For anyone signing this document unaware that doing so in the presence of a notary is a deliberate misuse since you obviously aren’t living with an inmate inside a prison, beware of the ramifications of signing such an instrument. Inside TDCJ, you CANNOT marry anyone other than the person on the Affidavit without providing TDCJ with a divorce decree. 

I am attaching a photo of the Declaration And Registration Of Informal Marriage for your review as well as the warning regarding falsifying documents. 

WARNING: IT IS A FELONY TO FALSIFY INFORMATION ON THIS DOCUMENT. 

If you are attempting to marry an inmate who has this document on file with TDCJ or any other prison, it’s a problem. It’s not a problem that can’t be overcome but, it’s still a problem. If you are a client, contact me to go over what will be required to move forward with your Prison Wedding Planning Process. If you aren’t my client, good luck. 

Outside of prison, an Informal Marriage Declaration once filed, legally binds both parties. A divorce is required to dissolve the union. 

If you are from another country planning to marry an inmate in Texas, neither I nor anyone on my staff will conduct your wedding ceremony. Immigration Fraud is a crime. We will not make exceptions to anyone for any reason.  

The end answer regarding Unsworn Declarations is that while they may be effective outside obtaining a marriage license, they are still ineffective in obtaining one. Only the use of a notarized ID and Absentee Affidavit will substitute for the inmates presence at the clerks office. 

If You DON’T Focus On YOUR Journey To SUCCESS You Will End Up WORKING For The Person Who Did…

For a few months now I’ve been pushing off a press release for an award I was presented. Why? I don’t have time to sit down for a one to two hour interview. My work takes precedence over anything else in my life with family running a close second. 

I’m frequently asked how I became so successful by others who readily realize that I have never advertised or needed to. The answer is by exceeding my clients expectations. If everyone else in the sales industry would put forth the effort with each and every client they too would see amazing results but, sadly we live in a world where sales are similar to taking a number. Once the number is taken, it’s thrown in the trash. 

Relationships outlast the initial sale. I don’t treat clients like sales. I treat them as individuals and make their needs my priority. I’m different because I actually care about my clients. 

My Beto client last week touched my heart. Her journey hasn’t been easy. Both of her parents were sentenced to prison when she was only one year old. She had also just given up her apartment and had her car towed a week prior to her scheduled wedding at Beto. Hearing this news days before the wedding and knowing she had a two year old son touched my heart. How could I find her help for a very stressful situation? I quickly went to my contacts at Womens Haven and Union Gospel Mission as well as deeply discounting my fee and even offering to drive her to Beto myself. 

At her photo shoot, I asked her “what her plans were for her and her son?” My bride had family in East Texas but, her son attended school in Forest Hill and my client didn’t want to pull him out of the school she had fought to get him into. Her son’s school took precedence over any decision she would make to find a new home and job to support herself and her young son. 

It’s not well known but, my twin sister and I were residents at Women’s Haven ourselves at fifteen years old. Homeless and alone, Cindy and I both lived at the center until we could get on our feet again. During my divorce, I worked 2-3 jobs to support myself and my son while paying his Ad Lidem attorney and my own attorney. Without my twin sister helping me by taking care of my son, I have no idea how I would’ve afforded childcare back then. 

I’m driven and determined because I’ve always had to be. I’m compassionate because I’ve learned that caring about others journey is rare but, I care far more than anyone realizes. 

Yesterday as I was driving back from Dallas North Tower and the county clerk, my Beto bride called me regarding filing the license. An issue she faced was that she no longer lived at the address she had given when purchasing her marriage license. If I filed the license for her, it would be mailed to the old address. I spent some time going over a few alternatives with my client that included going to the post office to put a hold on her mail at her old address as well as getting a P.O. Box or filing the license in person. 

If I file a wedding license, it’s mailed directly to the address given by the couple. If a client files the license in person, the license is recorded and handed back. I suggested this option to ensure the license wasn’t lost in the mail and put gas money in the envelope containing her wedding photos to be sure she wouldn’t run out of gas getting to Dallas. I hadn’t heard from her prior to running to Dallas myself yesterday morning and assumed she had filed the license herself last Friday. Otherwise, I would have driven her to Dallas myself to spare her the trip and the expense of gasoline. 

This morning as I prepare for a call from Kate, a journalist on my way to Tarrant County Detention Center, I wonder if my bride has been by my office to pick up her wedding photos and gas money? I wonder if she has found a place to stay or a job and I wonder how the burden of expenses involved to be a Prison wife will affect her life? I worry constantly about my clients. I can’t help myself.

There’s a stack of mail in my office awaiting my attention. There’s also a five page questionnaire for Power Woman Of 2019 awaiting my attention. I have 172 emails to answer and I have a text from Cindy. My day is off to a “roaring start.”

Cindy now has both of her adult daughters and all three of her grandchildren living with her. I’ve talked to Adult Protection Services in Valdosta and Texas. The “Stephaney Situation” is finally blowing over although I may need to testify in Valdosta, Georgia regarding how my niece wound up there and how I realized that there was a problem while at Wynn Unit with my client in Huntsville, Texas. It’s a long story.

Cindy is overwhelmed at “trying to make everyone else happy in my home other than myself.” Cindy does it all and without my help, Cindy would be doing it alone. Maryssa and Makenna argue incessantly and Leigh Ann has a chip on her shoulder regarding her sister, Stephaney moving back home. “Five females fighting” is an ongoing rerun at Cindy’s house. Arguing over the bathrooms, arguing over the chores, arguing about each other. I could go on and on here. Cindy lives at Camp Chaos. Don’t let the happy smile you see Cindy wearing fool you. Cindy spent seventeen years caring for our selfish grandmother. My sister finally snapped over our grandmother and kicked her out after nearly eighteen years. I would have never moved her in. I’m far less tolerant of moochers and morons than Cindy. My twin has the soft heart regarding our family that I possess regarding our clients. It’s a fact. 

Cindy has spent her entire adult life caring for her children and grandchildren and Cindy needs a vacation. Cindy loves leaving her fighting family behind to jump in my SUV and head off to meet clients. Who could blame her? At home, chaos and more chores await my overworked twin sister. 

After listening to Cindy nearly crying while I sat in my SUV at the Tarrant County Clerks Office preparing to file licenses before walking across the street to the county jail, I butt in and suggested “laying down the law. It’s your house. Your adult children are guests. I’m highly concerned about Leigh Ann’s husband, Alex coming to stay from July to August and bringing more chaos. You need to establish rules and guidelines. If you don’t, I will.” Cindy knows I will and it will be far less confrontational if she would snap and start putting her own needs first. If she can’t though, I certainly can.  

My Beto bride sends a text asking “are you home?” I’m twenty minutes from home but at least an hour from attending to filing licenses and meeting my Tarrant County client. I suggest meeting me for lunch at the 7th street Starbucks in an hour after she picks up her wedding photos and gas money. I’m highly concerned about her and her child and have a list of suggestions for her to get back on her feet. I have plenty of time to get to Jack County Jail and Parker County Jail to meet my afternon clients before heading to Willow Lake Event Center with Cindy at 4PM. Leigh Ann will pick up Maryssa and Makenna at 3:30PM and after their incessant arguing this morning on the way to school, Cindy could use a break from the twins and Leigh Ann quite frankly. 

Yesterday, Cindy and I were with our clients at Taylor’s rental looking at bar height tables and chairs for a June graduation party when Leigh Ann sent a group text to Cindy and I regarding Stephaney. I was instantly lit because when my family know we are with clients, the last thing I need are to be blasted with family bickering but, Leigh Ann consistently and repeatedly makes her problems a priority to her mother and I. “Maddy had milk on her mouth and I asked where that milk came from? I went into the living room and Stephaney was eating cereal and had been sharing it with Maddy. I’m so furious about this that my hands are shaking!” 

I walked out of Taylor’s to call Leigh Ann. While she attempted to interrupt me, I interrupted her. “Listen, we are on location with clients. We don’t care about your problems and if Maddy wasn’t hungry she wouldn’t be asking Stephaney to feed her. You need to go feed your daughter and stop disrupting us with stupidity while we are working. We don’t care how mad you are. Now we are mad you bothered to dump your problem on us. Grow up.” I then hung up and practiced smiling in the parking lot before walking back to my clients and sister. 

I abhor disruptions to my carefully orchestrated agenda from family members and everyone realizes it. And yet, the consistent disruptions from my family are a regular and consistent occurrence in not only my life but my twin sisters too. Dash it all. 

What Leigh Ann should have been doing was feeding Maddy first and finishing the Sunday rehearsal photos second. But, explaining prioritizing to my niece is an escapade in futility. 

Meanwhile, my Bridgeport bride had sent me a message on FB that would have to wait until choosing tables and linens and my Allred client wanted to know about the Absentee Affidavit while my Torres client was concerned “about the glass” and my Eastham client wanted to know “how much longer the I60 would take?” My phone never stops ringing and bleeping alerts. 

Preparing myself to text back and answer emails from the Taylors parking lot after happily waving goodbye to my June clients, I turn to Cindy and say “about the California back and forth situation, I’ve come to a decision. We aren’t telling any of our adult children when we are leaving or arriving in California. We need a few days of fun without being drug into drama in San Diego with Leigh Ann, the twins and Alex. We won’t check in on FB. We will pretend we are still in Texas. Wink. Wink.” 

Cindy is shocked by my “plan.” I’m not. I need a break from my family and whether Cindy knows it or not, she does too. My sister is thinking. I jump in before she can respond (as usual) “listen, we are exhausted and overwhelmed. We have a podcast with Karen and then the Twyce Twins, a press release for Power Woman Of The Year, a follow up interview with Kate, and we are juggling 29 clients with new clients each and everyday. We need a vacation and I’m booking us into The Beverly Hills Bungalow for three days of spa, shopping and fun before we hit the bricks on that August wedding in two cities. It’s going to be an ass whipping and if we don’t catch our breath, I’m afraid we will be in the hospital from pure exhaustion. We are bouncing from Louisiana to Arkansas to Oklahoma to California seven times between August and October. It’s time to put our needs in the “front pocket” in order to be camera ready and refreshed for our clients. Our families and their chaos are killing us with stress Pal. Unlike our clients, they dont appreciate our sacrifice today, tomorrow or ever. With them it’s me, me, me, I, I, I. We must hopefully before our 55th birthday in November, learn to put our demanding kids and chaos on the back burner.” 

Warily, and probably feeling guilty (as usual) my twin sister agreed. Traveling gives us the opportunity to enjoy each other’s company but, thanks to cell phones, our family is always a text or phone call away from screwing up the day. It’s a fact.

My son and his wife have been traveling together as an Officiant and photography team the past 4 years. When my son and his wife get into an argument, everyone in my family hears about it. My daughter in law “I can’t drive with him in the car. Nothing I do is right and he makes me nervous.” My son “Stephanie doesn’t pay attention. She’s either driving too slow or driving too fast.” Me “you two are married and work together. Try to stop bickering and work together on learning patience.” Cindy “Robert and Stephanie Hafele are arguing again.” Me “I cannot stop what’s coming. Those two think they are communicating when in fact they are arguing.”

When I’m on location with Leigh Ann as I was last weekend at one of my rehearsals, I’m called “The Boss.” I instruct Leigh Ann on locations for photos and how to pose the wedding party. I wonder how Leigh Ann will handle addressing clients in California when I’m not there telling her what to do? It’s a valid point. I recognize that more flights to California to “save the day” await the Texas Twins. Our adult children are needy and often demanding. Heavy sigh. 

For two years now, I’ve been bouncing between states for inmate weddings. It was essential due to my burgeoning client base to add Leigh Ann as a TDCJ Officiant and to bump county Jail Weddings as well as traditional requests for an Officiant/photographer to Robert and Stephanie. 

Cindy and I are both stretched to the limits. My traditional bookings are now three years out. Weekends and evenings that include holidays are taken up by traditional clients. 

Trying to find a day off is impossible during wedding season. As usual, my anniversary will be bumped into my birthday this year when things slow down. My husband accepts my overwhelming schedule. He knew when he married me that I was an overachiever and accepts it. He’s also fifteen years older than me and turns off his phone from 6PM to 8AM Monday through Friday and altogether on weekends. 

Matthew is “off work when he is off the clock.” We have very different views regarding client needs. I never turn my phone off which may be why my husband is “tuned in” on client needs and family chaos. He hears it all. 

My husband doesn’t have any family to burden him with their problems. I cannot imagine what a worry free blessing that would be to not have adult children or grandchildren and their problems dumped in your lap like my husband doesn’t. Seriously. My husband as well as Cindy’s husband don’t have children which is a remarkable comparison to Cindy and I with our “carnival of chaos kids and grandchildren.” Opposites do attract. Our marriages are proof of that.

I’m going to go over the certified marriage license to address questions about the process of changing an inmate status from single to married. While we are inside a unit, often there will be a copy of the marriage license filed with inmate records. This is not a certified copy. 

What constitutes a certified copy being available has a few caviats. First, the license must be signed by the Officiant AND then filed at the clerks office either in person by the client or via certified mail from me to the clerks office BEFORE a certified copy of the license is available for purchase. 

The certified copy bears a seal deeming it as certified to be true and correct. While the original marriage license (after being signed and filed) can be used for the DMV and SS Office, it CANNOT be used for a change of status to inmate records. 

Only a certified copy of the marriage license can accomplish this task. You will purchase and then mail the certified copy to inmate records at the Unit your spouse is incarcerated at. 

You have 30 days from the date I married you at the Unit to provide a certified copy. You will then need to change your name (if you intend to do so) on your state issued ID for visits to the Unit.

The reason that Units NOW REQUIRE a certified license is to prove the marriage license was filed and is legally binding. 

Apparently, several people were “going through the motions to get married” but, by not filing the license, were effectively not legally married. Due to this issue, certified marriage licenses are now a requirement at many if not all Units.

Reading a text from one of my Coffield Unit brides was truly good news today. The inmate has made parole and will finally be coming home. I cannot wait to Officiate their Vow Renewal with family and friends present to celebrate their new journey of freedom and promise together. God Bless my amazing couple and their resilience. What a blessing.

My Beto bride and sit down together to “go over her plans for her son and their new direction to move to East Texas.” Visiting for a little over an hour before running off to Jack County, I also prayed that this trip would bring my client a new job and positive direction although removing her son from school was somewhat troubling to her. At two years old, her son is resilient enough to change schools now as opposed to being older. I will order her certified license as the Officiant and forward it to her to send to the Unit. 

Since there are many questions about certified marriage licenses, I’m adding a photo of the questionare for Dallas County for your review. 

The cost in Dallas is $10. The cost may vary by county. Tarrant county charges $21. Unlike Dallas county, there is no form online in Tarrant county. Here’s the link– Tarrant County Certified Marriage License Request.

Juggling incoming emails and text messages while sitting in the parking lot of Jack County Jail, my husband sends me a text telling me he loves me. It’s the little things but the stinky skunk development problem is finally over and Matthew is relieved! Thank goodness. We’ve had a month of brain storming to solve the skunk issue and, it’s a month too long. 

I miss my happy go lucky husband. Matthew is actually hilarious when he isn’t stressed out. Cindy and I are looking forward to road tripping to Stiles, San Saba, Crain and Huntsville Units before heading back to Louisiana in May. We love getting away for a day or two and hitting the junk shops together. 

My husband prefers long walks with my feisty Beagle, Foxy Wortham along with the Golf Channel or NASCAR and a dry martini. 

Cindy’s husband left for Canada today so she has 5-6 days before Steve Daniel is back home for a 1-3 day “staycation” at Camp Chaos AKA Cindy and Steve’s house. 

With five females fighting over the bathroom, I’m guessing Steve was “ready to roll.” Fighting for a bathroom isn’t fun at Cindy’s house. I drink a lot of water and coffee and it’s not uncommon for me to stop at Petro on my way to her house to effectively “stand in line.” 

Things will get worse when Alex comes to stay for a month before leaving for San Diego with Leigh Ann, Maddy and the twins. A summer in San Diego will do them all good and an empty house will be a Godsend to Cindy as we bounce all over the place to client bookings. 

In fact, I’m looking forward to Cindy staying at my house for our slumber parties and spook movie nights.

My Saturday clients are so much fun that Leigh Ann and I can’t wait to see them again. I love it when clients at outgoing and spirited at photo shoots.We love our LBGT clients and I’m looking forward to seeing the rest of the rehearsal photos for Brokk and Ruben. 

Since I’ve been asked, I do stop and start blogs between bookings. I just leave my WordPress app open and pick up where I’ve left off. All of my blogs are typed with one finger on my iPhone. Often, while waiting on a client at a Unit or venue. I spend a lot of time waiting as I’m always early.

I reviewed another email regarding someone else blogging on one of my sites and will once again go over why I have no interest in “guest writers.” First, my content is entirely my own and based on my experiences with clients and my family since they are both combined. 

Secondly, I have no interest in sharing my platform with others. 

Thirdly, I do not allow back links on any of my sites. Sorry, but, I’m not now nor will I ever be interested in having a guest blogger.

I’m off to the Parker County Courthouse and looking forward to meeting all of my new clients in the coming weeks… 

“Everybody Clings To Their Own Fear. Everybody Hides Their Scars” Moving On Down The Highway…

Wednesday afternoon while headed to Willow Lake Event Center, my TDCJ Beto Client called me while exiting Santa Fe towards the venue and my “traditional clients.” Sitting at the red light watching semi’s pulling out of Petro, I hit “accept” and wondered where my brother in law, Steve was driving since I hadn’t heard from him since Monday and if my niece, Stephaney would get the waitress job she had applied for at Petro? My mind never stops.

Apparently, the Warden at Beto had called my bride which is somewhat unusual. I shifted my attention to her to find out more. “He will be behind glass. The glass upsets me. I was hoping to hold his hand or hug him but, we will be separated. I’m terribly upset about this.” Dang. I was rattled myself. “The glass.” No one loves the glass. 

Since I was thirty five minutes early for my appointment at Willow Lake and only twelve minutes away, I pulled into Petro to attempt to calm down my client. 

I should note that the majority of my “upset client calls” will always be my Prison Wedding Clients. Why? Because they are not in control of a lengthy process that often confuses them and occasionally even scares or angers them. I’m the hand holder. I’m generally the go between and I’m usually the one talking to the Warden. 

The glass is something no one is ever comfortable with. Behind the glass, the inmate is also handcuffed. At Ferguson Unit, the inmate was also locked into the cage behind the glass. 

Ferguson was also the first time I would encounter an inmate behind the glass and effectively, shocking to me. I didn’t expect the glass although my client was prepared for it. Occasionally while inside the visitation area for a wedding ceremony, I will notice the glass cracked or writing on the wood. I asked one guard “how did the glass get broken?” 

The answer surprised me. “Well, Miss Wendy, the inmates get angry at visitors and hit the glass.” Hit the glass? To the person that drove all the way to the Unit? Waited in a long line. Went through the screening process? I was shocked. The wiring under (also sometimes above) the glass was how my client and I communicated with the inmate. It’s essential that the inmate can understand the commitment aspect of the wedding ceremony. 

I was more than a little nervous about the inmate hearing and subsequently, understanding me but, he could easily hear and understand the ceremony. 

The wedding photo above thrilled my client because the glass “merged them together.” Walking back to the parking lot, I hid my silent tears from my client and “braced myself” for smiles a few miles from the Unit for her wedding photos. I didn’t want her to know how rattled I was about the glass and the wedding photos. I hid my sorrow intentionally. She couldn’t touch him. It pained me. 

As a mother, the aspect of marrying an inmate is a lonely life of isolation for many of my clients marrying an inmate that is often serving 20, 30, 50 years or even life. My clients may never see their spouse on the outside. It’s not an easy path. They may never touch them. 

I worry about my TDCJ Clients and on occasion, have even talked a few out of marrying the inmate. It’s a rare occurrence but, it has happened. The “Coffield Unit Con Man” who attempted to control my client and her money needed the boot and got it. 

On my fourth phone call from my emotional Coffield client, I had suggested that she consider what the inmate was bringing to her life. If the only “gift” was strife and argument, it was a gift that she needed to give back. 

It took a month but, the Prison Wedding Planning Process isn’t “quick or easy.” If one of my TDCJ clients wants “out,” they have time to effectively “hit the highway.”

Mary was determined to marry Lester. Her path wasn’t easy. It would take months. Mary would never touch Lester. The glass would always be separating them from one another even on their wedding day. 

The glass didn’t make Mary uncomfortable as it hadn’t made Nikia uncomfortable. Mary and Nikia were prepared for the separation. I was the only one uncomfortable with the glass and the inability of my clients to touch their new spouses. It always saddens me. 

It’s difficult for me to accept that for a number of my clients, they will never touch their spouse. The glass will be a part of every visit they make to the Unit. It will be a permanent “barrier.” 

The glass is something neither I or anyone else can  change but, it always saddens me nonetheless. It’s something I must accept ascmy clients have. It’s also something “I’m working on.” G4 and G5 inmates are always behind the glass. Lifers are too. I’m never really prepared mentally to Officiate a ceremony that won’t be “sealed with a kiss.” My heart hurts. I have had hundreds and even over a thousand “other couples” to compare my wedding ceremonies to. 

From my couples “on the outside” to couples “on the inside,” the differences between both sets of my clients is significant. 

While one set of my clients worries about the perfect dress, the perfect cake, the perfect venue, the guest list, the DJ, the photographer and more, the other set of clients drives several hours to get to the Unit, worry that their clothing will be within the visitation guideline, and try to remember to bring quarters to buy low quality wedding photos for $3 each if they are even offered at the Unit. Private Units do not offer photos. 

I had finally calmed my Beto client down “about the glass” before pulling out of Petro. It wasn’t an “easy conversation” it never is when a client is upset. 

Mentally, I prepared myself for the first “behind the glass” ceremony at Beto. I wondered if they would have the phones Allred did that no one could hear using? I hoped my bride wouldn’t cry seeing the inmate behind the glass. 

I recalled my Coffield client vomiting in a trash can beside me when we walked in to find her beau behind the glass. The shock rattled her to such an extent that it took several moments to calm her before proceeding with the ceremony. She also “nearly ran” from the Unit following the ceremony. I was forced to chase her down because I feared that if she left the Unit upset, she might have a car accident. Luckily, I had plenty of time to talk her through the shock of the glass and explain to her that it was something neither of us could control. 

Normally, I leave one Unit to head to another. On the Coffield Unit day of “the glass,” I wasn’t due at another Unit for several hours and had plenty of time to spend with my client. She was so upset that she skipped doing bridal photos and I bought her lunch instead at the infamous General Store in Tennessee Colony. 

Thursday morning at 6AM, I checked in with my Beto bride. I was juggling several other “traditional clients” on my books for rehearsals Wednesday evening, Thursday evening and Friday evening for wedding ceremonies at venues on Saturday and Sunday. I was also apprehensive about how my bride would react to “the glass.” 

In fact, I was so worried about my bride that I offered to drive her myself to the Unit. This is rare but, it’s happened. My Estes bride didn’t drive and took a bus from Houston to Fort Worth. I picked her up and took her to breakfast before driving her to Sanders Estes for her ceremony and upon leaving the Unit, had a great time with her at the Botanic Gardens getting some fun bridal photos for her. 

I’m different. You will hear me say this over and over because it’s true. I care about my clients and their journey. It’s not an easy journey for TDCJ clients.

At 9:30AM Thursday, I had already been to the post office to mail photos and contracts to clients, filled up my SUV, hit the bank for quarters, met with my Saturday client to go over vendor details and driven through a Starbucks for egg white bites and a non fat latte. My Beto bride was to meet me at 9:30 and leave her car at my home. 

The drive to Beto could run two hours and fifteen minutes to two hours and thirty minutes based on traffic and road construction. 

Sitting in my SUV and responding to emails regarding Roach, Darrington, Hutchins, Bradshaw and Garza East Units while sipping my latte, I checked the time, 10:01AM. Alarmed, I sent a text to my bride to ask where she was? 

A few minutes later, she responded “my son was late to school and I need to leave him with my inlaws. They live in DeSoto.” I quickly checked the distance from DeSoto to Beto and DeSoto to my location to Beto. 

There was no way my client could get from DeSoto to me and me to drive to Beto and arrive by 1PM. Because of this, I suggested meeting me at Beto. I would arrive first and if my client was runnng late, explain her tardiness to the wardens secretary. I also immediately left my driveway headed for Beto.

With my preselected stack of cd’s beside me, it would be a day of music from artists with the first name of John. I noticed this before jumping on 20 to head to 287. Usually, I just grab a stack from my case and apparently, my husband had organized cd’s in the order of the first name. I thought I was OCD lol. 

From Johnny Cash to John Cougar Mellencamp to John Denver and John Fogerty, I opted for Fogerty and thought about the hearing and lawsuit he had won regarding being himself. For those unaware of the irony or the story, here’s the link– John Fogerty Plagiarism Suit 1988. Plagiarizing himself? How could he be anyone else. The case went before the Supreme Court. 

With “Here We Go Rocking All Over The World” blaring on my radio, I jumped onto the highway. I would be “on the dash” because I had planned to leave at 9:30AM with my client. I operate on strict timelines that allow a “cushion.” I’m not a last minute anything type of person. 

The drive through Waxahachie is often time consuming due to traffic but, I was making good time and checked in with my client on her GPS estimated arrival time. 

Taking several phone calls during my trip, Cindy and Stephaney were at her second interview at Petro. Steve was in New York. 

My son was in Arkansas and my husband was back at the “Stinky Skunk Development In Springtown.” Leigh Ann was editing photos for three clients. The skunk development has been an ongoing escapade. Everyone in my husband’s office questions “why Matthew is handling it himself?” John, the builder had never encountered a problem of this magnitude. In fact, no one had. My husband has tried everything to get the smell out of the house and if he can’t, will be the person forced to deal with the homeowner returning from Japan May 4th. The same day I’m out of town with clients and my team. Ugh.

Driving through Eureka, Texas and thinking to myself “there should be an exclamation point after the name,” I check back in with my client. She’s due to arrive at Beto at 12:47PM. I’m rolling in (according to navigation lady) at 12:32PM. 

I changed my cd to Elton John and paid attention to the words as I sang along to “let us strive to make a way to make all hatred cease. There’s a man over there. What’s his color? I don’t care. He’s my brother. Let us, let us live in peace” as I rolled on over a long bridge with a peaceful lake that no one is ever using on my trips to Tennessee Colony. Why doesn’t anyone use that lake? I wonder this on every trip across the bridge. 

Twenty minutes out from the Unit, I call Cindy before popping in John Cougar and laughing about his “hey, hit the highway!” Its funny to me because I’m always hitting the highway and “finding a lover that won’t drive you crazy” while stating that you want them to “hit the highway” is somewhat offensive and blunt to say the least. It’s also funny. John Cougar is a real character. 

The joys of road construction in Tennessee Colony continue. Now the “follow me” truck has moved from Coffield/Michael to Beto/Gurney. Jeez. I call my bride. She’s about ten minutes behind me. I remind her not to speed and get pulled over. 

As I stand in the parking area looking for my client, I decide to go to the entrance and alert the tower of my arrival. She arrives a few minutes later looking beautiful in slacks with blonde hair. I wonder if she had colored it since I had last seen her? I love the cut. As usual, I consider growing my hair out and trying to go with a new style but, who are we kidding here? I constantly try to cut my own hair and lack the patience to grow my hair out. 

Walking into the Unit, we screen in and wait. As usual, my bra sets off the metal detector and we take a seat. I’d skip the underwire but, I’m far too busty. One day, maybe when I have time, I will get a reduction.

My friendly guard comes to escort us and asks “how is your twin doing?” Cindy’s basement has flooded yet again from heavy rain and I’m headed to Parker County today after filing licenses in Tarrant County to help her mop up. The Daniel Diva house consistently floods in the basement. We’ve had twenty years of flooding at Cindy’s. It’s an ongoing escapade.

Walking in, I look for the phone or a hole under the glass. There isn’t one. The steel mesh above the glass is how the inmate will hear us. It’s difficult to get a clear photo with the glass and the area we are in is somewhat cramped. My client is doing well under the circumstances. She’s not crying or upset.

Leaving the Unit, I suggest stopping at the General Store for her to use the restroom and offer to buy her a cola. I was surprised to hear that she doesn’t consume caffeine and bought her a cranberry juice instead. 

We head to my favorite new abandoned building outside Tennessee Colony on the way back to Corsicana. I love the peeling paint and forgotten “look” of this building right off the remote back roads.My bride is joyous the wedding is over and she can now have some fun. Most of my clients have the most fun with me on location photography shoots. As I go through my rolling photo booth switching out props and changing areas, my Saturday client, Brok sends a text to confirm Saturday at 3PM. I answer “my team and I will be there with bells on.” 

Brok responds “we are so excited!” My team and I are too. I’ve been looking forward to this wedding and celebration for a month now. They are incorporating hand fasting into their ceremony and I love creative input. Brok and Ruben are so much fun. My bride loved the props I had packed and I asked “how much gas do you have? Do you have to stop for gas on your way back to DeSoto?” She did so I handed her an extra roll of quarters from my SUV and gave her a hug as I headed on to Hodge Unit to meet my next client. 

I want only good things for all of my clients. My TDCJ clients often face a difficult journey because they are effectively “pulling the wagon alone.” For many of them, the inmate faces many years but, for my Beto bride, the inmate is due for release in three. I’m happy to hear this because at the very least, she will have an opportunity to experience married life “on the outside.” 

A very large percentage of my clients will never have the opportunity. My heart is heavy for the journey they will face without ever having an opportunity to hold their partners hand. Their passion and resilience is unmatched by most couples. The sheer dedication of my clients is amazing. They don’t give up. For them, live isn’t only a four letter word. It’s their life. Love believes all things and bears all things for my TDCJ Clients. 

My husband sends a text from his office that cracks me up near Corsicana. The staff had sprinkled powder and purchased a stuffed skunk to surprise him. It’s hard to laugh about the skunk that’s caused so many problems but, my husband did.Hopefully, in the coming week, the smell is resolved before the homeowner returns. My husband saw an Elk near the new home and was amazed at the wildlife out in Springtown. I remind him of my encounter with a black bear on the patio of the lake house in Arkansas. I’m not a “country person.” If I never encounter another bear, I’m “good with it.”

Rolling back onto the highway outside Corsicana, I pop in Melissa Etheridge and “Everybody Has A Hunger No Matter Who They Are.” Melissa is right. I’m hungry for dinner back home and looking forward to sharing supper with Matthew before running off to Marty Leonard Chapel to meet clients. 

I hope my clients and connections enjoy a beautiful weekend of sunshine and enjoy a few good times, great music and Spring weather…